|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|07 Jul 2003||crystal||truthfully, when asked, it's hard for me to come up with direct reasons for wanting to commit suicide. it's a mixture of fear, confusion, rejection, and loneliness. and you all know how that goes. i've always been the type of person that wants to please everyone but it's so goddamned hard to do! and the fear that permanently resides in me can not be explained. it just is. people wonder how i could ever think about killing myself with all i have going for me... i am engaged and have a pretty bright future. but they must remember that i have been diagnosed with clinical depression and sometimes the urge cannot be helped. my fiance worries about me constantly... he's counted pills to make sure that i don't take too many and also locked me in our bedroom at night so that i couldn't leave when he was sleeping. i know i should be glad that he loves me and that i have loving and caring friends and family but i'm so fucking confused. one minute i want something and the next minute i want the exact opposite: example: sometimes i want to marry my fiance asap and sometimes i want to wait a while. and i get mad at him for not knowing what he wants! how can i expect from him what i can't do myself? i am such a goddamned hypocrite. i've attempted suicide twice by OD and i know that if i succeeded it would be again by OD. it seems so easily accessible (esp. with my array of medications) and it goes so fast. if any of you have any words of wisdom, gimme an email. thanks.|
|02 Jul 2003||Phil||when someone helps u Will, give me a bell... I wanna die too..|
|30 Jun 2003||will snow||can someone help me. i wanna die.......|
|30 Jun 2003||cate decaney||i'm 14 and i have had enuf i want to kill myself yesterday my step had hit me cause i had a argument with my mom and now i have just had it i am not looking for attention i hate my life when my step dad was beating me my mom just watched him and did'nt do a wor he hates me and i wish that it was all over so please send me some idea's that are short and sweet not a lot of pain i just want to be out of this world asap|
|30 Jun 2003||will||hmmm, im feelin really depressed again. i hate feelin like this:( i feel as though im sinkin in a hole. its kinda weird, but then i am........|
|30 Jun 2003||will||aarrghh, im feelin real low again. i look in a mirror and i see my horrible dad. hey, if i was rich, i could have plastic surgery. hmmm, on second thoughts, i might end up looking like Wacko Jacko! gee, im so ugly..........|
|28 Jun 2003||mute invert||almost one year ago, i met this girl in a chatroom. i fell in love with her just after ive talked to her a bit, even before i saw her what she looked like, which is beautiful. we never even met, but i know i love her. she said she loved me, until two months ago, when she became distant, and when i told her i love her once more, because i thought it was something i had done, she just replied that love is such a strong word. i didnt realize what that meant at first, but then it finally came into my cynical mind that she didn't love me anymore. i kept talking to her, mainly because that was the only thing that acually made me happy. ive cried a lot even. i told her still that i love her and that she was the only girl i love and that i would wait as long as it would take for us to be together. she said she didnt want to wait five years just to get a boyfriend. i asked her if she wanted a boyfriend, because i would be okay with it if she did, but she said she doesnt want one. three days ago, on tuesday, she just popped up and said "guess what, i got a bf". i tried to act as though i was okay with that, but i instantly lost all that was left of happiness in me. she said she didn't want a boyfriend, and she lied, thats what hurt me so bad. i still talk to her, since she is my only reason to live anymore, or more like the only reason i have to live is hope that we will end up together, but even though i know she will never love me again, if she ever did love me, i still think it possible, defying all logic. but not all the time i talk to her, i just feel like crying, and sometimes i even do. i dont know why i still love her. i act cheery when i talk to her, so as to not appear jealous, but i am so very much so, when my one true love is dating someone else. the only song i can listen to is kim, but its only for some unknown relief, i would never hurt her. in my whole life i tried commiting suicide four times, strangling, but i can never do it since im a fucking pussy. since she stopped loving me, i wanted even more to kill myself. i swear i would have if i had a syringe, by injecting carbon dioxide in my bloodstream, a almost painless death. i think about cutting my wrist all the time i dont talk to her, but im too scared of the pain, so i instead scratch my wrist frequently, again for a type of unexplained relief.
i know some people have problems way worse than mine, who have managed to cope with them, but i really dont care. i love her, shes the only girl in my world.
|27 Jun 2003||Karla||I think that I need major help. AAAHHH my shrink all my meds EVERYTHING DOESNT HELP AHHH E-MAIL ME GOD DAMNIT|
|26 Jun 2003||will||ummm, i was laying on the bed listening to my music with the earphones, & i started thinking about hanging myself again. im desperately trying to be really positive about life, but scum like me, just shouldnt exist. i was never planned. i believe that my sisters would never have been sexually abused by my dad if i hadnt been born. my dad had a disability which he passed on to me, so he took out his anger on them, although he did physically abuse and mentally abuse me. but that doesnt matter. perhaps he should have sexually abused me so as to protect them. i wanna cry. if you dont hear from me after friday, you know ive hung myself. im really really sorry :( love Will xx|
|23 Jun 2003||pierre||I can't face it anymore, you just can read how pain grow up, I tried to go tchating with, but she did not write back and I kept waiting for a letter, I think I will use an empty needle,read in your site il less painful than hanging, this probably the last word you ever got from me, you know, life is a whore and i am a fuckin teen with no money to feed her, no weapon to face the difficulties i hope it is better upstairs, really hope i could see them crying over my grave, regreting what they have done to me. But it's too late now, too late to help me, cause now I don't need any help, just some mor courage to go trought.being a lonely people for the rest of my life no thank, I'd rather write a bye bye letter so they could understand how deep my pain was.|
|23 Jun 2003||pierre||just a few word to say that sometimes I just feel like crying, and knowing no one could help me is so sad.
In fact during three years i have been insulted, treated like shit by my classmates and that's why I ran away with a rope in my bag, just in case.
But I was too young and missing courage, so I waited during three years from 14 to 17 and know I am really ready for the great trip, ready to see if life exists after death.
I think suicide is the best way to finish your life when you know that those two fucking sister sadness and cries will be around you forever. I hope that life will be happier on the other side
|23 Jun 2003||pierre||I am just writing this mail because i feel so alone, and know it will be the same during my whole life, that's why I prefer to end up now and hang myself.
I really wanna die because it is the only courageous thing I could do.
In fact, no one really knows me and I don't trust people enough to talk to them, that 's why I prefer to die, to keep all the things that hurt inside of me and don't care for the others like they do to me. You know, suicide should be taken seriously, and not as a fuckin joke, death is important so don't make suicide a way to attract attention on you because after you may not be taken seriously and people would keep telling you: well she just wants to attract attention, he is very disturbed these days.That's why hanging yourself is one of the best way to die
|23 Jun 2003||leanne||in the past 8 days my body has digested: 31 paracetamol 13 ibuprofen 10 aspirin 37 laxatives and 23 diet pills.. achievement: fuk all. last of my 4 most important ppl 2 me has jus exited 2day: best m8 (3yrs) jus moved 2 the other side of england. we were bulimics 2getha all throughout highskool, she kno's virtually my lifestory; recently made the mistake of tellin her of my suicide attempt (jus the 1) she cried 4 a wile, told me it was a big cop out & it wasnt the answer.. rite.. 'so wot, my dear friend, is the answer? told her i was ova it so she can move away feelin guilt-free & worry-less.t he biggest lie ive eva told! we1st met wen i noticed her sittin in the cafeteria wiv no tray. i approached her &found common ground. 2nd person.. nxt door neighbour who i really fell 4 & stil hav not gotton ova. we met wen i moved house a yr ago. sittin outside in my garden@1am, came&spoke 2 me. startd pissin down wiv rain. we stayd there drenched chattin nonstop. howeva, i made anotha mistake; opend up 2 him & poured my tales of woes. l8r he sed he cant b wiv me coz my mind is 'in a messd up place' & i 'need 2 sort myself out' .u c, poor old him couldnt cope wiv my probs! neva spoke 2 me again. he moved away 2 university.
3)my 3 big bros...1 moved 2 australia, otha 2 moved away & we hav v. lil contact.
4)my father. he neva wantd me as a daughter, wantd me 2 b sumfin else 2 him. visit him once a wile in his flat. hadnt seen me in ages (few months ago) & he made comments; how much ive grown in2 a 'sexy' young woman & i had a gorgeous body. jus bout 2 go bed wen he makes an offer 'leanne,wanna sleep wiv me 2nite?' dnt 4get i was alone wiv him & an 1hr's train journey from home. ofcourse i refused, lockd the door & went 2 bed-nite seemd 2 last 4 days. no longer speak 2 him. he tried 2 justify himself, using the excuse of lovin me 2 much. told me not 2 tel mum. wen she found out, he calld me a liar.
ur all probly wonderin y i seem upset bout no.4.well, the truth, i feel nothin but pure rejection. not only from the guy i liked whom i poured out my heart 2 & gave me nothin in return, but also that im not good enuff 2 b a daughter. feel cheap, dirty & no amount of showers will scrub it off.. worst part is a month ago, afta i'd lost contact wiv him & my bros were 1st 2 kno, my fav bro calls me up & nite, tells me all 3 hav been sexually abused by him yrs ago&.. so was i, wen i was 2 young 2 remember. mum knew xactly wot a sik bastard he was, yet she married &stayd wiv him 4 more yrs. she knew wot he dun 2 my bros, they knew wot he did 2 me, yet they wotched me go 2 his house alone 4 yrs wen i had no idea. it cld hav bin prevented, nun of them protected me & told me 2 stay away from him. howeva, mum has no idea i kno i was sexually abused by him: bro sed not 2 tel her. so im livin in anger 2wards mum & i cant even argue it out.
sory 4 typing 2 much. jus wana say 2 all ppl out there wiv abusiv ppl in their lives.. dont fall 4 their petty xcuses or u'l bcum a victim &a sucker 4 bullshit. nothin can justify wot they did & im sory it happend 2 u. keep tlkin through it ere wiv every1..so much eazier tlkin 2 a bunch of strangers.. we r the least likely group of ppl 2 past judgement & disgust unlike the rest of bastard society who r all livin in this fuckin fantasy world. love u. xx
|21 Jun 2003||leanne||GOD, those bastards still aint visited.. not even a fone call-thats the last time i eva invite those invisible friends round. dont u jus h8 it wen ur non-existent friends neva show!! havent stepped out of my house 4 a record of..13 days now. the only contact i've had wiv the outside world so far, was last nite wen i sat out in my garden @ 3am, marvelling @ the clear sky, feelin the cool air kiss my skin so gently, listening 2 nothing but the silence stirring wiv lite breeze. i look a state, legs still unshaven, eyebrows unplucked, hair unwashed, stil wearing the same dirty pj's and dark circles remain so stubborn under my tired eyes, despite doin nothin but sleepin during the day and emerging from my bed @ nite 2 log on.apart from that, time is spent swallowing pills (ibuprofen, paracetamol, nytol etc), while my eyez remain fixed 2 the glow of my tv. wots the point.. ive nothin 2 do, nothin 2 say and no1 2 c. i swear...
if we cried blood, i'd already b dead........ 4 i lose about a pint a day.
my mother along wiv the rest of them remain knowledgeless of my ed.. how could she understand.. that woman called mum merely flirts & dabbles wiv the latest diets, whereas i have a full on long-term relationship wiv mine. slite distinction there, wouldnt u all agree?? i've been killing myself slowly wiv ED's whilst trying 2 end it quickly with OD's. oh my life is fulfilled with excitement!!! anyway, just a girl, it seriously worries me wen u stay quiet 4 this long. oh and molli.. sorry 4 spellin ur name wrong earlier. peace&love all round.. xx
|21 Jun 2003||Jackie||Nothing is going right. My life is soooo shitty i tried 2 audition 4 sratz in therir eyes kidz got a call back but my mam stoppes me then called me tarty. I am bullimic and still v.fat I got carp exam results and need sum 1 2 talk 2|
|20 Jun 2003||molli||okay this is the third one I have written in one nigth and I don't care bout that but ya I have said alot tonigth and everything is unorganized...
but ya where to begin how about age 5..
at age 5 I had a best friend and her and I would play all the time. well one day she was playing a game that we both knwo how to play, it was where u tied a rope to the top of a slide and then to your waist. well on friday when we were riding the bus my friend (Kelly) decided to tell my not to tie the rope to loose because when u slip u could die. well that weekend we were both playing outside but she was at her house and I was at mine when an ambulance came down the roade and kelly was in it, she had died... she slipped, her rope was too loose and she hung herself. most say it was an accident but I never heard her scream or anything and how would she know that a rope to loose would kill u, I think she killed herself and she was 6 years old.... after that I was traumatized and it was what caused and triggered my deep depression.... I spent year in counselling after that .... in between the ages 6-8 I had half of my family die and also my mom lost everything. she became sick and she also lost both her parents in a matter of 2 years and also had a baby on the way (my sister which we adopted her name is alexis) she lost it and stopped being the mom when my sister came we lost track of who played the role of mom, me or her..... if that was not bad enough at age 8 I was also raped by another girl... all of this only made my depression worse. I was so little and scared and I never told my counsellers so they never knew. by 9 I started drinking and also started cutting my wrist and arms at and I became an addict to both.... with this I had earned an eating disorder I became blemic (sorry can't spell this things too well) and anerexic... plus I was trying to raise my sister because my mom was too stressed and sick.... my dad was always working since my mom didn't work he had to support the family... So now I am living with guilt 2 addictions, 2 eating disorders, damage from a rape, I am trying to raise a kid and also trying to find parents besides going to school and I am only 9 at this time!
By the age of 10 I gave up I was done with and I didn't want to live any more so for the next three years I was going to try to kill myself. during this time my mom had another kid and it was my brother his name is joshua, he is now the second child I have to raise. Life was rough and now at the age of 14 and living throught that hell everyday for 5 years I am finally getting help and finding my way out but this will take years and so that is my life story though I am still thinking about suicide sometimes and cutting and drinking and I still have a few eating problems and I still send out my cry for help along with trying to answer others cries too.... I hope u listened and learned and yes I am only 14
|20 Jun 2003||molli||once again sorry for all that shit I am just so scared my life just keeps getting fucked up and shit and no one knows the secrets of my life I don't know if I will keep living because of all the damage I have done to my body already I mean I keep fainting and stuff and my parents don't believe me any more when I say I think I migth be really sick and that first nigth on here I was upset scared and the last thing I wanted was to find a site with blood dripping down it and a site that asked me the question of what is the best way to suicide and that nigth I wanted to cut cut cut and cut some more so bad but I couldn't and after all of this I am still shaking and crying and I wish some one would understand me love me hold me and believe me. why do I have to be so alone?
listen to me these are my cries for help!!!! please some one :'(
|19 Jun 2003||Kyle||AHHH...... all I know is I really hate living this life!!.... my life was pretty good until i was in the 6th grade... I finally came back to reality... and i woke up to a depression... i want to die so bad... but whenever somebody finds out they just start crying about how much they care about me and shit... well if they care about me so much how come they can't act like they do around me??... How come they didn't start to care until they realized i wanted to die?..... what's wrong with people... my friends ditch me for this stupid guy... who all he wants to do is get in bed with them... i really just wanna OD..... so please just tell me how much advil or ibeprofen i would have to take to die!!...|
|18 Jun 2003||Genevieve||PPL don't understand how hard it is to kill yourself and everyone wants the easiest way. I don't have a gun to shoot myself, I'm not sure how to hang myself exactly, but I have only one question... does any kind of drug work to commit suicide by a drug overdose? I really need that fact on overdoses and poison because when I do it I want to make sure I don't live to have to try again. Please tell me everything soon! My life totally sucks and nobody cares, if you want to help me, tell me how to die by an overdose... that easiest, fastest way to die. I want it over now. I can't take any more shit.|
|11 Jun 2003||Karla||Please guys- this really makes me sick when i think of my family and suicide and reading some of these stories out here on this site makes me sick too. Hey i wanna commit suicide but i dont know how to because my family goes crazy if i say i want to be dead. I dont want them to be devastated and never go on with their life thinking about f*ckin me.|