Date	Name/email Nom/email	What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13? Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
08 May 2004	Felicia The Great	Hello Mouchette, Lucy Cortina, Billy the Weeping Freak, and all the new members... I have been on hiatus. I really apologize for not coming on this site as often as I should. But I have a poem for you guys that would give you a thought to ponder. "An Empty Heart is Filled" By Felicia A. Floresca "There is only one way to fill your empty heart. The only way to fill your empty heart is to have LOVE FOR LIFE. Without LOVE for this ONE LIFE, you feel that nothing around you exists. You have to realize that each portion of your life, whether good or bad, is a gift in which TIME can no longer take away from you and all this leads to happy or sad memories. We must allow ourselves by remember this... ...that allowing ourselves by remembering that LOVE FOR LIFE is the epiphany for living for EXISTENCE." Hang in there folks because "Today is the first day of the rest of your life."
31 Oct 2003	A friend	Lucy Cortina. She thought she wanted to die. But she wanted to kill.
27 Sep 2003	Felicia	I did see Lucy Cortina on the Tranny website. My GAWD! The boobs look so real. And they are bigger than mine. Shall I trade for some new ones?
25 Sep 2003	Dr. D. Breast	Dear suicidals. Welcome to the lesson for the day: "There's a Lucy in all of us". I am quite sure you all know Our Lucy, a fine specimen from the new Psychology texts. All humans have thoughts, feelings and ideas that they dare not express. All humans have the potential to be evil. All humans are the same. The mentally ill are no more "freaky" than the average dull-looking person. They are just a lot more magnified if you like, or "enlarged". The crazy, maybe even disturbing thoughts that lie undiscovered behind the 'sane' persona can sometimes build up to toxic levels, which is when you are declared "insane" and sent into psychiatric care. Now dear people, do not fear, there is a solution! and the solution is very simple. Do a Lucy. Yes, you heard right. Do a Lucy. Use our new invention called "Lucy Cortina" and get the outrageous, maybe even disturbing thoughts out of your system. Write them down, make a diary. Post them on suicide forums. Post them to the Queen of Austria... This will lead to a rich and sane life, with all demons expelled. Mental illness will decrease dramatically. And people like me won't have to choose a career which makes us as crazy as our patients.
20 Sep 2003	Phil	Why am I still here Steve? Well, why is anyone still here, posting on the suicide kit? I have my reasons for being alive still, and they are nothing to do with this website at all. I do have a life, even if it's not much of one. I have been suicidal for a while and soon, let's just say soon, I may be dead. I think it's ok for me to post here still in my days before my demise. Lucy Cortina is dead, at least in name. I have to go now cos Beyonce is on the TV, shaking her...um.... breasts. Yes Steve, I'm gay, but have some strange obsession with breasts. I don't actually understand the point of them - they're so soft and gooshy and just lie there, doing nothing. And yes gay punk, I may have been posting as someone before, lets just say. My boyfriend has changed his name now though, so don't worry about that ;) And Naomi, we do care, more than you could imagine.
15 Sep 2003	Felicia	Lucy Cortina, I am real. Real as you can ever be. Don't leave the world yet in such a dramatic fashion. I have been submitting manuscripts to publishers, which is more suicidal. All the coffee in the world does not make me a better writer. In fact, since my brain is empty, which is more often than usual, I can tell you that indeed I'm all flesh and bones here. If you are leaving for sure, be sure to email me. And Billy, if you know a few one liners, send more to make the world chuckle and laugh. Lucy Cortina, please I don't know you, but all of us in Mouchette love you.
31 Aug 2003	Lucy Cortina	I can't get away from it! I'm on a special lesbian-detox, and what happens? I see Madonna snogging Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera on my mini portable battery operated TV last night. It's all so disturbing to me. I reported Felicia last week and she got sent to a special home because she attempted to commit suicide after I told her I didn't love her. I might go in and see visit her now. I might take her a few copies of Housewives Without The Husband, to cheer her up. And maybe a copy of the latest newspaper. There's a lovely picture of Christina Aguilera turning up at the VMA awards, dressed as a pink feather duster. That should cheer her up.
03 Jun 2003	Lucy Cortina	A friend of mine was discussing with me last night, apart from "boobies", forms of suicide. She thinks that getting a gun and shooting yourself will work. Then she paused and said, "But won't you go to jail for attempting to murder... YOURSELF?!" Stupid, stupid, I know! Then her mummy said "You would be locked up in a secure mental hospital". So there's my answer, huh. Oh Felicia, how I feel for you. But I won't be feeling for your boobies. It's always been said that the American population (bar actors/resses, popstars and TV presenters) are officially obese. Obese boobies, however, is a great thing. It's a pity that Icecream wasn't injected into them instead. When I was anorexic and my arms got very thin, I just replied: "Missy Elliott sat on them!" As for Billy, alas. Face down chanting "...and then they hit me!" (meaning my.. er, 'bombs') in a pub is no doubt his current location.
31 May 2003	Lucy Cortina	If only you could die laughing. If only that way of suicide worked. I have just seen an old lady in one of those old-lady-buggies die a horrible death. She was whizzing along the pavement in her buggy, when it got out of control. It got faster and faster until the wheels caught on the pavement and it flew into the air, did a summersault over the hedge, and the old lady landed in a field on her back and died. All the people from the local church were rushing to her rescue, crying, and praying. I just walked on and started laughing and wheezing once I had got around the corner.
15 May 2003	just a girl	Mouchette! i am shocked! what on earth is a girl like me doing in your 'favourites' list?? oh do tell.. after all i am.. Just a girl :P (and where has that lucy cortina gal got to? i'm missing those stories i live for.. o dear...)
10 May 2003	just a girl	well mouchette.. i am very thankful for ur website.. although i must suggest, u should really change the name... UNDER 13? mmmm at least let the little kiddies have a childhood before we open them up to our hatred of life and love for suicide answers... perhaps change to... for teenagers? as most of ur readers are teenagers, not many under 13.. thank god.. but still i must thank you for ur website.. it has helped me in my dark times.. instead of crying in my room with my music so loud i didn't have to hear the rest of the world, wallowed in my self pity, i come here and read fabulous lucy cortina's wild stories.. so thank you lucy... by the way who are you? how old are you? and how have u managed to stay alive for this long? ... mouchette's website i'm guessing? and your boobies? who knows.. but still write back to me if u feel like a chat... im 16 yr old girl.. and just wanted to join in on ur fun.. oh and who is mouchette? byebye for now...
29 Apr 2003	Chris	LUCY CORTINA- I know you're always fussing about your enormous breasts. So here it is, I've found you a job where you can use your breasts at maximum capacity. Why don't you become a (drum roll please)... prostitute! Men (including me) love large breasts and in case you are thinking that yours are too enormous to handle I have found you a solution also. Recently in a newspaper dated Tuesday, April 8, 2003 I read this article, which if you are interested you can use. Here it goes.. Hanky Panky sex school The former madam of a Dutch escort agency has opened a Hanky Panky school for prostitutes to teach the world's oldest profession how to make more money. Elene Vis-whose frank autobiography "Escort Queen with Turbopower" made her a Dutch tabloid darling-opened the school last week in a luxury Amsterdam canal house to offer prostitutes exclusive sales training to boost their business. Come on Lucy. Apart from the standard "up the ass treatment", "through the cunt treatment" and the "blowjob treatment" you can offer "wobbly breast suck treatment" or "hide and seek, try to find your hidden dick between my breasts treatment", and other Lucy specialities. If you are thinking about the SSSS missions don't worry. You couldn't do better than become a prostitute. When men are having sex with beautiful girls with large breasts, you'll be surprised how easy you can suck out information out of them. They are high, they don't know what they are doing or saying and they will tell you anything you want to know. Come on Lucy, you know it makes sense, you will make more money, your breasts will find peace because they will realise that they are useful, it helps the SSSS and the prostitute school bill is on the SSSS. See ya in a brothel!
12 Apr 2003	Raija	Lucy Cortina, please email me.I am Danny Keaton's mum. I need to talk to you.
11 Apr 2003	Raija	Lucy Cortina, Please contact me. I am Danny Keaton's mum.My ICQ # is 145614610
10 Apr 2003	Riah Hilton	Lucy Cortina, I am Danny's mum. please contact me on icq #145614610.
20 Mar 2003	Lucy Cortina	Idiot - I've never been serious about killing MYself, I dunno about the others. But if I need to read another post like yours, I probably will be.
11 Mar 2003	Michael Mackellar	MY PULSAR ~WOW!! i read about Pulsars this morning (also referred to as spinning, magnetic-neutron stars). My birthstar may be one of these instead of the Blackhole i felt it must have been when i was little. Did you know the magnetic field of My Pulsar is about 100 billion times as strong as the magnetic field of the Earth?? Actually, i'm exaggerating a bit. It is only 1 billion times as strong. Most pulsars spin once every second or so; the slowest has a period of about 4 seconds, but the fastest yet discovered (which happens to be mine) spins on its axis more than 600 million times a second. Actually, i've just caught myself exaggerating again. It is only 600 times a second, but we're working on making it more impressive. Imagine a ball of stuff the size of Lucy Cortina's left... Novelty, yet containing as much mass as our Sun, spinning once every 1.6 milliseconds and there you'll have some idea just what My Pulsar is like... ...Once again i've managed to exaggerate the facts and for that you have my apologies. You would only have to imagine a ball of stuff the size of Mt Everest... nothing so immeasurably gigantic as the aforementioned... Novelty. By the bye, Roger Blandford, of Caltech, has estimated that there may be more than 100 million isolated blackholes across our Milky Way galaxy... and that the nearest one may indeed be much further away than we'd all like to hope it could be.
09 Mar 2003	Lucy Cortina	Swallowing chunks is no problem for me, it used to be how I made my living. It's just that I'm not quite as inter-lectual as some people here. And I do believe that Danny Keaton of Super Sexy Spy Sex is tracking me for my new mission... I'm on the run, don't you know.
09 Mar 2003	Mouchette	And if I may add something to what Lucy Cortina just asked you, please Michael, put some returns in your text, so that we don't have to swallow such big chunks in one piece.
09 Mar 2003	Lucy Cortina	I've only just swallowed my medication Michael, I can only understand things in Teletubby terms at the minute. Could you maybe write in larger letters, possibly with some colourful pictures, just for lil' me? The girls (the girls being my boobs) would much appreciate it too :)

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