|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|03 Nov 2006||EmMa||hi im emma (age 13) i cant take it any more pleaz help every 1 hates me i have no friens when i come home from sleepin all day at skool where every one teases e for bein different and willin 2 speak up i get straight on da pc or i go do drugs and shyt i hate it i dont give a flyin FUCK about life noone will go out wit i asked 1 guy out and he almost fuckin peed his pants 4 laughin god I WANT TO FUCKIN DIE (AND I HATE GOD DAMN THERIPISTS) HELP MEEEEEEE T__T email me wit help pleazzzzz and no god damn docters pleazzzzz (firstname.lastname@example.org) ps im fuckin adicted wit myspace >_< damn it my life suxxxxxxxx|
|03 Nov 2006||k8y||dont do it find someone who loves you for me it was my frends coz my parents dont give a fuck and think i do drugs but hay just live life to the full!!!!|
|03 Nov 2006||kate||my name is kate and im a 14 yr old aussie... just dnt do it ppl life is worth living ive lernt that the hard way after waking up after taking 3 panadol with 1/2 a bottle of voka ive lernt just get some frends who love you and who dont judge tou and who just take you for who you are live life to the full its the only way to go wven if you fell like shit theres always something to keep you going ... my somthing was a guy called called eric he was always there no matter wat ppl sed... even after i got kickd off skool camp for drinking and after evry1 thort i was on cocain he was there ... always just there no matter wat|
|02 Nov 2006||Desperate Anonymos Girl||I'm 13 and I just don't noe I want suggestions myself I've tried making my life happy I tried asking out ppl I tried so many things I worked hard and not to brag but I'm really smart but I can't stand it it's always my fault my parents don't make it any better I lost my best friend for nothing I can't deal with now what started out as trying to make myself happy has turned into preocupying myself so I don't think of these things now everything turns into slow plotting a slow daeth I can't go on It's really hard and as for heaven and hell I don't believe I gave up a long time ago I haven'thad hope in a real long time no guys like me anymore and I do my best not to show my low self esteem and as for cutting myself yea I used to that then I realized thats pointless drugs too though I'm still for drinking I wannna die Help
comments answers suggestions anything
my s/n is seenfromamirror
I've tried everything It's not working
|02 Nov 2006||painful_deseption||IM 16 have tried 3 seperate time i have tried it all and nothing works first i tried hanging myself but mom walked in.second time i slit my wrists but i unforchantally missed the viens and all i got was stitches my most recent attempt was shooting my self but dad found out and took my rifle away.|
|01 Nov 2006||Katie||I am 18 yrs old and like most of the people here want to die. my life lately has been one blow after another. i feel like i have no friends and nothing to live for. i have never really tried suicide before. the thing i am most afraid of is whats next if i only knew i would end it all. so here i sit on my bed crying my eyes out because i just dont know what to do. i have so many people in my family but i feel like no one cares to relize whats happening. i am failing at college, i cant get a boyfriend because im fat and disgusting and i just dont want to live like this anymore.in high school i was at the top of all my classes and now college is so hard on me i just dont know what to do with my life. i finally realized that all my "friends" are the fakest peole i ever met and i hate everyone of them. so yeah u all say to find someone u trust to talk about these things well guess what i dont have anyone that i trust. so i keep it all to myself and it just builds and builds until lately its become to much for me to handle. so please i just want someone who doesnt know me and cant jusdge my to help! because i have probably told my mom 100 times that i need to talk to a therapist but she doesnt take me seriously. i know this would devistate her if she knew i felt this way but how can i help that i feel my life isnt worth living anymore? i just had to get this off my chest and it feels good to know that someone knows how i feel even if i dont know u!|
|01 Nov 2006||Colette||Okay... so ive made a posting before but i still have more things that i want to say... Yesterday i tried t kill myself again. I climbed to the roof of a tall building. I swung my legs over the side... But there were people down there... So i thought, what if i fall on one of then and fall them dead? Or what if i die in front of them and they get so down that they kill themselves as well... So i couldnt. But i am going to do it. I do want to fucking die!!! Just in a different way that doesnt impact other people so badly. Maybe i will get rattex or something like that. I dont know. Just know i am going to fucking do it becoz i am truely and totally worthless|
|28 Oct 2006||why god why?||im abot to kill myself and im 14. life is a living hell.my parents dont give a rats ass about my and have been hurting me out/inside for as long as i can rememer. there is no one in my life who hasnt betrayed me. ive also turned my death into an experiment. whil in heaven im going to try and respond to this! also, when peple say tht suicide is a sin because ur choosin ur deth instead of god. MABEY suicide is gods chosen death for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!|
|27 Oct 2006||steve||plz help mi some one the person i love is trying to over dose its driving mi to doing it as well please hellp i dont want her (email@example.com)my name is steve and i love this girl please help her to stop mi email is firstname.lastname@example.org
thanx help before its to late its happenin now
|27 Oct 2006||Phoenix||I just wanted to make a correction to my previous statement regarding the mixture of ----. First of all it does not release a -------- gas, but instead releases a deadly gas that irritates the lungs, causing them to fill with fluid. In effect causing you to drown.
I imagine that a --- death is similar, whereas your body is deprived of oxygen by the destruction of the red blood cells... Either way you suffocate to death.
I don't know what I believe in as far as god goes, but since I last shared I went through a terrible depression and am feeling quite numb.
The endless drowning in emotional pain has subsided, I feel like I've been given an emotional novacain. I don't know if someone else read my plight and had me in their thoughts, or if just sharing helped to bleed the poison, or if my mind just had enough.
Anyway, I hope that whoever else is looking for answers can find them, or at least the peace of numbness until the pain passes.
DON'T DO DRUGS! Drugs are bad, m'kay..
|26 Oct 2006||cory thomas||i fink the best way to die is in ur sleep, no lies ders been many times wer i wanted to kill myself bt i cant get the gutts to actualy do it, also i have a girlfriend dat i fink is goin to try an harm her self, bt i dnt want her to i love her so much, bt im torn between dis ,if she ever killed her self i dnt fink id b able to live wid it therfor i fink it wud make it much easier for me, den mayb dat way i cud be wid her for ever|
|26 Oct 2006||garrett DiVincenzo||i am 15 and life is already fucked for me i kno i have no future i kno i have no life ahead of me and its sorta sick but i wanna put a hole throw my head just to see the next world well by wat i have siad so far i bet most of the people that r reading this think i am sick in the the head no i am not wen ur mom disowns u but not ur sisters u got time to think y did she do that i was only 3 i did nothing and wen ur da beats u soo badly wen u fight back he gets a bat then beats u agian wen the cops don't balieve u wen u have to call the emergency room every other night cuz ur not like ur sisters or wen if a teacher calls from school u go 2 weeks with out food or a bed and if u try running away u get cought cuz u got a fucking tracking device implanted in u cuz u decided to run away wen u were only 6. i would never write somthing online this personal or any thing only if one reason if i would kill my self. so in about 5 mins witch is 6:35 10/26/06 i will put a bullet in my head so i say this kids that think they r suicidel well guess wat im doing it in 3 mins so i hope u all don't turn out like me|
|25 Oct 2006||grace||my name is grace and i lost my best friend/bf when i was 12. he just left one day with out a goodbye. it took me forever to move on but i found someone who loved me more than i ever thought that anyone could love me. problem was that i was too wrapped up in my death to see this love. and now its too late. after 11 attempts and at least 9 hopsitalzations im still here. after addictions to e, lsd, pot, painkillers and sleeping pills. i just wait for a slow death from a destroyed liver. ive fought through a broken family, a broken heart, three major addictions, four car crashes, eleven attempts, nine hospitalizations and an eating disorder. why isnt god letting me just die?|
|25 Oct 2006||Danni||Ello ive tried 2 kill miself by taking an overdose. i find life really hard i have been bullied all my life and noone really likes me. No1 seems 2 understand that i dnt want to live... i h8 life. y iz it evry1 iz 2 faced and stabs you in the back. i feel like i cant trust any1 please help me x|
|25 Oct 2006||colette||im not under 13, but i am suicidal... Have been for a very long time. If i can remember correctly it started when i was 9. Reason is being molested by those who should have loved me. i truely hate myself. im 27 now. ive been raped as well. ive seen 5 or 6 shrinks in my lifetime. Therapy doesnt work. i cant talk. i just wish that i was dead... that i could die as quickly as possible. ive tried to kill mysell so many times. i cut myself a lot. i want to fucking die!!!|
|23 Oct 2006||Jacob||My name is Jacob. I have been depressed with suicidal thoughts for 4 and a half years. im 14, 15 on the 18th of april. if you want me to give you some advice just email me - email@example.com|
|22 Oct 2006||Phoenix||Hello. I've read a few of the plights here, and as I sit here typing with tears in my eyes and heaviness in my heart for the pain I see in [all of] your words here, I hope that I have some thing to share that will help you find strength to go one more day.
I've alot to say, and I'll answer the question the best as I can, but I must first beg you to find your passion in life. You have one, we all do, for me its dancing.
I'm a 37 y.o. gay male that has been living with HIV/AIDS since 12, when I was raped, beaten and left for dead in the desert. I was raised by Jehovah Witness mother and step-father, both of who either hated or dispised my existence in thier secret hearts.
I could never tell them what happened, just as I couldn't tell my mother I was molested by my foster parents when I was 3. My parents thought I had ran away for a few days and came home bruised and broken from the wicked world out there. To this day, they are still clueless to the events of the rape.
I knew I was infected, the asshole told me he infected me, and even if I were to live, I was going to die of AIDS. I hid this from my parents, and I don't think they even know today.
I eventually escaped their controlling abusive behavior; I haven't seen them for nearly 20 years now. I've spent most of my life praying and begging w/ all my heart, all my soul, to die. I admit, there are times the dark clouds disappate and life goes on, but those times are becoming more and more scarce and last even less time.
I have recently lost all my friends, the truth is if I died right now, the only person to know would be my landlord. I've also just recently lost the only person who ever treated me with any respect and love, when I realized he was ignorant of my HIV status. I told him, knowing I would loose him, and haven't heard from him since. I love him, I have hurt so many people in my life (either through my short experiment with drugs, or the way I've treated the ones I love), never meaning to hurt, or harm anyone, just trying to live life like everyone else.
It seems I'm cursed to have nothing, and live in perpetual, never-ending remorse, shame and self-loathing. I cannot imagine loathing myself any more then what I do.
I was a short term (1 year) tweeker, and in that time lost all my self built friends/family that mean the world to me (Thomas S, Tommy S, Tony M, Gena M, Tracy A, Tim O, and all the rest). I lost my car, my savings and everything I owned to my tweeker boyfriend during that time who tried to kill me 9 times and failed. I didn't really mind, I wanted (still want) to die.
I've lost any and all chance of ever being able to be a dancer. This hurts as much as anything else, for dancing is my sole. I hear music in my dreams, I dance myself out of bed in my sleep, I dance through the grocery store, in line and on the street. Music is the only thing that possesses me and drowns out the pain, suffering and torment I live with.
But now, my grief and guilt over the misunderstanding of my HIV status drowns out everything else and I can't bear to laugh. I have to drone out the overwhelming self-hatred and pain with anything that can occupy my mind.
That only lasts so long, for as soon as I have to sleep, or am given a single moment of a happier state of mind, instantly I remind myself of the possibilities that await the guy I love, and my part in it.
Although he never asked, I never volunteered. I assumed he knew, everyone knows, I don't keep it a secret. I should've made sure he knew, but you know what kind of mood breaker that is even if he did know.
Anyway, I now realize that I have nothing left in life. I have never really had anyone (not even mother or father) love me (although I have had a alot of guys chase me), I have no friends, no job (too sick off and on to hold one down), no money (still waiting endlessly for SSDI to approve my application for assistance), no future (I've been HIV postive for over 20 year and full blown AIDS since 2001 - my cd4 fluctuates around 45), no hope, no prospects, no chances and lastly no more chances to dance.
I think the easiest and possibly a painful way of dying is with home-made cyanide (bleach and ammonia). The vapors are extremely poisonous cyanide. Cyanide has no chance of survival. It is a free radical that destroys red blood cells.
A free radical means that there is nothing that will react with it to nuetralize its effects, in other words, once introduced into the human body, if not removed (if introduced cutaneously, it could be cut out instantly) it will continue to destroy your red blood cells until there were non left.
You would die of metalbolic failure, cell death, suffocation... I believe this method would be quite painful as you would quickly die in a cell by cell death. However I don't know if it would be painful or if the release of death would be worth it.
DO NOT attempt blowing your brains out with a gun. You can live through it if you don't do it right. For example, a little known fact of Kurt Cobain's suicide, he had to blow his head off twice.
The first time, he missed and blew half his head off, passed out, and came to realizing his error. With half a head he finished the job.
One of my lost friends/roommates was a ICU Nurse for over 20 years and told me of some of her patients who attempted suicide with a gun and only blew out their spinal column and lived. Forever condemned to a life as a quad, never being able to end it, forever hooked up to machines keeping them alive against their desires.
Pills, if you try and fail, too many things can go wrong. Someone may find out, if you live and they know, your life as it is, gets worse 10 fold. Even if noone finds out of the failed attempt, the subsequent side-effects can have permanent effects such as:
-Toxicity (causing organ death/failure) try living w/ a colostomy bag hanging out your ass, or hooked up to a dialysis machine (not that I can imagine an overdose failure ending in a colostomy bag, but...)
-Brain Damage (hey, this might solve the suicidal behavior, a do-it-yourself lombotomy)
All of these will end w/ someone knowing of your failed attempt; and although it might get you help (probably just a lot of psycho-bable bs) you'll be forever classified a 51/50 and if you ever overcome the suicidal times of your life, you'll always be labled mentally ill.
Jumping off a building/high place... U want your remains to be roadkill? If you don't care about that, do you want to live through that and be like the poor bastard who tried to blow his brains out and failed, forever consigned as a quad?
Try the noose, and if you fail, you can have a tell-tale scare around your neck. Or, if your lucky to break your neck but unlucky and live... again a quad.
Face it. The fact is we are meant to be tortured and tormented. Why play into it, why make it stronger. Why make it worse. Life sucks and will find a way to SCREW you over every time, and if you try to beat life, I fear a guarantee that it will rise up and really make things worse.
I know how stupid that sounds, but think about it. If it wasn't true, why are you reading this, why are you so miserable. Your reading this, your at this page because your spirit longs to be free of this mortal coil, this hell; and you KNOW life hates you, and does anything it can to make your life miserable.
Anyway, like the 31 yo w/ wife and kids (for your kids my heart dies, because of your pain and where I fear you will end up; for you my hear bleeds, your pain is unjust; and for your wife my heart hates, her apathy and attitude are tantamount to murder) I have muscle relaxers, and a few months worth of HIV cocktail that I plan on o/ding on. I've tried these last 20 years to not take any meds hoping to die quicker, but I'm just unlucky and am one of those doomed to live with it, forever sick.
I don't know when I will finally finish this, I know there is still something left undone, something I have to do. I just hope I have done it by writing here, passing along some tidbits of knowledge that may help others.
Anyway, feel free to post my email, or edit my message for content or length as you see fit. Anyone who responds to my email address while I still persevere I will attempt to answer.
Anyway, blessed be all. ONA and Sigma Pi forever
Delta: Duke of Hurl of the Eta Iota Chapter
|18 Oct 2006||Emily Hope||Help please! I'm only 11 years old and my brother rapes me. My Dad stabs me and they're both drunks! ive tryed cutting myself but they just got the idea i like the pain they're giving me so they do it more and more now.I've tryed to run away. I found my sister that way, but my brother found me, so ive been thinking about suicide latly, but i dont want to. I want to someday meet someone and fall in love. but thats probally never going to happen. and I dont want to call child serveses again. I dont want a diffrent family...i love this one...please help..|
|17 Oct 2006||Rae||Hey my name is Rae. i'm 18 years old. i tried commiting sucide several times. here are some nifty ideas. you could stop eating for 3 days and stop drinking water too. that will kill you. you could cut your wrists and you can die that way. or give your self a thousand paper cuts. any way possible i'm gonna be dead i hate life and it sucks.|
|17 Oct 2006||sara||hey ive had a terrible life i hate it and thats all i can say im 14 and dont feel it can get any better but alot worse! my familt gives me everything i want and need but i am always depressed i feel like takin my life but just dont have the guts to do it. thinkin about my family if i was dead and how they feel makes me feel so bad for them. i had to go to a counciller when i was 12 as i dreamed about things a 12 year old shouldnt dream about such as my parents dying it was realy hard for me when i woke up cryin! also school is the worst times for me ive moved schools alot and just cant take it my secondary school i got bullied alot and its not like i cant stick up for my self its just im not the type of person that likes school and i left that school a couple of months ago as it got to much and had to move in with my dad leaving 3 sisters and one brother and mum and a step dad which was hard as ive never left them before expecially my mum as ive been with her all my life! its was very hard leaving my 4 year old sister and 2 year old brother as im realy close to them i finally settled down but had to get a new school i now do have a new one and im hating it as its a new school making new friends and its just not working people in year 10 seem to have their own friends own groups and so on i dont no wot to do and at this point in my life im thinkin about commiting suicide ive already cut my wrist and wrote death letters i dont no wot else to do please help im desperite!|