|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|02 May 2010||Shanelle||I would say if you wanted a painless way to go, just swallow a bunch of pills and go to sleep, or I've heard drowning is peaceful. But the thing is, I want a painless way to go and that is why I haven't done it yet. I've tried the hole pill thing and strangling myself and even swallowing chemicals. Nothing has worked for me. When I tried to strangle myself my body just made me let go of the cord and I dont think I passed out but something happened. When I tried the chemicals my boyfriend came in and put his finger down my throat to spit them out. and the pills... I just dont think that method works because I've tried that twice and I must have a reeeallly strong stomach (lucky me.. rolls eyes) My boyfriend says it doesnt work because I don't truly want to die. He thinks I'm too scared of death. Which is sort of true. its like this, I love him more than I could ever love anyone (besides my brother but in a different way) I was a virgin before him and He was my first and only love. but now (I still love him the same) I hate him and I don't really think I want to be with him, but I dont want to live life without him because There is nothing for me here. So I am sad everyday. I also am scared because its like, what if there really is a hell? or what happens when you die???? If only I KNEW. and as a response to something someone else said on here... No, God doesn't give you whatever you ask for dumbass. I've prayed for a fatal disease, for him to take it away from someone who wanted life and give it to me, but no. I have to stay "alive"... >:(|
|30 Apr 2010||Marilyn||pardon me, but i've always felt that broken hearts are less painful than empty hearts.
pain... it's all the same at the end of the day, isn't it? contradictory as it may sound... but then again i am already used to contradicting myself. all my life, it's what i've constantly seem to be doing.
sometimes late at night, when everyone in the household is asleep, i like to climb over the gates and have a little walk. it's so peaceful, save for the occasional passing vehicle. but it's all good. sometimes i like to make believe potential rapists or vampires lurking by... waiting to devour me. my soul, perhaps. "carve the pain of my life, into my soul..."
i guess i just like to place myself in dangerous situations, because it sure beats being stuck in a rut, like i have been all my life. i never really belonged, but then again, we never really do, do we?
when i was 11 i saw a dead cat on my way home. i doubt i can ever forget how it looked like, and the odd, unfamiliar sound it gave off. it was dead, and there were flies surrounding it. and all i could ever think then was, "how lucky. even when it's dead, it is still of some use." i guess what i meant then was that in the very least, it was still of some use to those flies...
i am never useful and i know i never will be... but what i hate about it is that i don't think i will ever be able to change that fact. and then i hate myself for being so useless, so lifeless... now the hatred has faded, and my existence has since dulled a great deal.
the best way to kill yourself, regardless of your age, is to live. i am no counselor, but really, by living, it already is a torture which will kill you, perhaps even consume you, day by day...
|28 Apr 2010||no name!||Over the past 3 moths Ive been thinking about commiting suicide, the mere thought of it is present in my everyday routine. Btw, Im not 13, Im 21 and Chilean. During these last 4 years of my life Ive been through a lot of shit. My so called big family are all dead, some of my friends commited suicide or got killed while street racing. Of course that was a huge strike in my life, and I mourned their death for a long time, I even thought about killing myself too, but somehow I managed to overcome it. Then, I had a gf whom i spent 3 ½ years with, but we had to mutually break up cause she was moving to Argentina. In those times, we made the promise that we were going to move on and find someone else to love. She was lucky, and found a guy who treated her good enough, but after a while he was unfaithful and he would even emotionally/physically mistreat her. Of course we were bff by that time and I was worried about her. Then, some time later I received a call from her dad, he told me she had commited suicide because she fell deep in love with that argentinian bastard... but it was weird though, I cried all that night, and the next day I felt some kind of relief. Anyway, then after a year a pretty shy girl entered the college Im currently studying. I immediately thought she was the one. I was too scared that year so we would communicate by email or fotolog. Then the next year after that I finally made up my mind and asked her out; it took us some months but we ended up having a beautiful 5 months relationship. Then, the day she broke up with me, my world started to shatter again. She told me I was the perfect guy she always had wanted to have but somehow, and since I was her first bf ever she said she didnt love me and that she only loved me as a good friend. Reluctantly I had to accept her terms to be friends. We decided that we were gonna try it the next year and that we should take the 3 months summer breaks to think it over. Our friendship was fine til someday she stopepd answering my emails (we were at our respectives cities b4 coming back to college again) without apparent reason. We didnt talk for a long time and then when I finally got to see her again she had changed. She was colder and indifferent, I was debastated and pissed off at the same time so I behaved just like her. Then after a couple of fights we managed to keep the friendship but nothing was the same, she didnt feel like talking to me and recently I stop putting my endevours on the line. I just dont fucking get it, all i did was loving her and all i receive is indifference, she really doesnt seem to give a shit about me and even though she said she loved me (as a friend), she does nothing to prove it. Of course there are more details, but i wont tell them just not to bore u more. The fact is that we broke 3 months ago and the feeling is killing me inside. This time around I feel like Ive reached the bottom and that i can no longer reach out. Life sucks, I have no gf, no friends to rely on and the worst thing is that I have to fake and pretend that Im ok.... Then my parents, I always fight with them, they dont understand shit and they are not helping at all, they just want me to get good grades at college and stuff. If i commit suicide I wont give a shit about them or anyone, I mean i do love them, but they dont know the pain Ive endured these past 4 years of my fucking life! Im their son and they dont even know my true personality!!! I was always the strong guy who would overcome any shortcoming without even worry about it, like a happy-go-lucky person but since I met this gir Ive become weak. I have noone to talk to... besides nobody wants a friend who is always in pain, lets face it, ppl are so damn busy with their miserable lives living in their fantasy worlds that they dont have time for the others! I always have time to be there for someonw but all I receive is a cold treatment and ppl getting away from me coz I already helped them... Fuck, the society we live in nowadays sucks! The media seems more important, the vampire stuff, everything is more important than love! C´mon ppl!!!!! why is it that hard to find someone who cares about you, when its so easy to find someone who looks down on you?.... Oh, and let me tell you something about god.. Im a believer, but I give a shit about religion. Religion is just something the churches created to give ppl something to believe in. Theres nothing worst than a person praying to good to help them... cmon god is not gonna help! And if u asked good to be successful and u succeeded at that, its not because of god, its coz of ur personal motivation!!! god wont come down here and fix ur problems, so dont even mention that cruel bastard!... I would rely on music to reach out, but nothing seems to help, i dont enjoy doing anything and I hate my current situation... plz dont say everythings gonna be ok coz it wont... i dont really care if after my death ppl or my parents are gonna result hurt, I wish that happened so that way they could undergo what Ive been through my whole life. Why ppl have to w8 til some big shit happens to realize they could have done something?... probably they would say oh he was in pain, and I didnt realize it or shit, he is my ex bf and i screw up, I shoulnt have to stop talking to him or whatever!..... Im mature enough to know what the pros and cons of this action are, and I really hate the situation Im into right now. Theres no turn around here, i mean obviously noone cares, I can see that everyday!!! my mail is now empty, during classes nobody notices me, thats shit!!!!! Ive overcome this suicidal feeling b4, but now its the bottom line, the point where theres no return! Im just waiting for the right time to do it while I continue suffering because of everyone elses behaviour towards me..... The method Ill use is drinking paint thinner (diluyente in spanish), I once heard that an old retired man would drink a small amount of that mixed with lemon, he said it was good for ur health but if u put more paint thinner than a little bit u would die; some day he had a habg over and he miscalculated the amount of paint thiner and eventually died... Fuck life ppl!!!! I dont really want to keep on living like this, suffering and death surround me everywhere I go! Fuck off, if nobody cares, then Ill just take the ticket to nowhere and get the fuck out of this miserable life!|
|21 Apr 2010||brnt||I have tried to kill myself before. Cutting, and mainly burning. I used to lock myself after having a shower. Turn off the lights and cry.I had and still have uncontrollable emotions. When i didnt want to cry i'd ball my eyes out. When I wanted to cut so badly because honestly its indescribable to amount of times i wants to put a massivly deep cut in my left arm. but I havent. Not that often anyway. When I didnt want to cut I just did it. I cant get help I live in a shitty town my sister whos now seeing a coucellor - for attension like she likes. And Im the one who needs help. As much as Id like to say some of these comments sound like u dont know how the fuck it feels like tht. And saying that there are people worse off. HELLO> that doesnt change the fact u want to to die so bad. Its not omg. I hate maths i want to die. Its omg I cant live this life anymore. I need help. alot. get help. try. because you'd have a better chance of finding help. 3 weekends from now. Im going to book a ticket to go to somewhere bigger and im going to see the one I love the most(family) and im getting his help becuse he understands. So jus try. even if u have to run away, do it for urself. If ur like me and ur mum says ur a drama queen. Killing urself. I just wanna cut. But i think hanging urself is pretty wik....... HELP ME PLEASE IM GOING INSANE WITH. The only way I show it is through alone by myself(self harm) drawings or just full on squriming around ccrying feeling like ive just been shot hiding in my room, Help.|
|18 Apr 2010||ditsy||After reading everything Im thinking of driving off a bridge.
Im not 13 Im 53. Im tired - so damn tired. My son has no time for me and my brother, after screwing my mother out of money and breaking his promise to my father on his deathbed, doesn't talk to me anymore. I got sick with bowel infections - had a collostomy, and then a reversal....and then got cancer. Went through chemo and lost my job - im "overqualified" for everything I apply for and so Im broke.
I would love the answer - I love going to sleep at night and so often wish I could just keep sleeping and not wake up
|16 Apr 2010||Charlotte||I dont even know what to say my heads a complete mess im 18 (turn 19 in may) and my life....well i wouldnt even call it a life is a constant nightmare. I suffer from depression and anxiety to the MAX i have Madd mixed anxiety depressive disorder,im on medication for this im sick of life everyday is pain pain pain felt like this since 12yrs old i didnt finish school due to this i dropped out of college due to this and i cant get a job because this i have EXTREME social anxiety when im around people i get chronic stomach aches and sometimes puke up because of my nerves i also slur my words and get severe sweaty palms around people i dont know why me? Why am i like this? I dont have a friend in the world if i died tomorrow id have about 4 people at my funeral and thats family i have cut my arms i now have scars up my left arm i mean why am i alive whats the point my father has bi polar disorder so to add to my crap life i live with somebody who has more ups and downs than a yo yo god i just wish i get the nerve i need to end my pain...|
|14 Apr 2010||Katiee||Im Katiee Miller i am 14 years old and i have tryed killing my slef many times!
i have tryed and thought about killing my self since i was 12 years old! pretty young.
i have never really tolled anyone in my family that i have wanted to do this.
because they may think that i am fucking crazi!
i have asked my mom what she would do is i tryed to kill her and she freaks the fuck out,its pretty funny i think!(:
i tell her how i i will kill her and where i will put her body and every thing! But like i can see in my mind waht im going to do to her and where im going to put her body and shit!
i have asked my mom and dad and my boyfriend if they have ever thought about killing them self or other people my mom and dad said hell no,but my boyfriend said that he has!
so i know i am not alone,and after i found this web sight i was like oh shit there are other people like me to.
I have cut my self for ever i have always coverd it up and no one on my family has ever seen it bt people at school have and i try very ard to hide it bt its really hard when it bleeds alot!
people have goon down to the school people and tell them that i cut my self and shit and that just pisses me off even more!
i have had to go to the ER for shaking and panic atacks and shit like that!
i dont know it i am like depressed or what.
well here is my story. email me is u can help hee please!
|14 Apr 2010||Oliver||I'm sitting in my room, there is a noose in my bathroom tied to the shower rail and I've been trying to work up the courage to kill myself, guess I'm just apprehensive of the 10 min or so of excruciating pain it will take to asphyxiate myself.
Its not a new problem for me, I am 23 and I have been clinically depressed for about 5 years, I've never fully attempted suicide but i've come close many times. Recently I have become so introverted and hopeless, I've always had high hopes for myself, I wanted to be a filmmaker and/or a musician and/or an artist, I've spent years cultivating the technical skills for such endeavors, but my own obscurity and insecurity has ruined my chances of doing anything with these skills. I just dropped out of art school for the second time, and I am bound to be evicted since im in student accomodation, my student loan has been cut and I've got no job and a lot of debt, also dont have any real friends and the one person I loved says she has never hated anyone as much as me and is glad i'm miserable. If anyone can tell me why I shouldn't kill myself please email me: email@example.com
|13 Apr 2010||Ed||I think of killing myself daily and at night just pray that it's my time to go in my sleep. My life has completely fallen apart the last two years and it's just a mess. My teen years were horrible, my 20s were a mess, I lost my job, lost my apt because of it, can't find work, living unemployment check to check and now basically ran out of money. I'm 11k in debt and had to move back home and hear nothing but shit from my parents on a daily basis..Life really isn't worth living, is there a point? No, I don't think so. Some people were born for greatness, some are just put on this planet for no reason. I can't catch a break. I just can't get that one chance I need. Life truly fuckin sucks, it is true..when your down you just get stepped on..The rich get richer, the poor poorer. I'm just so sick of it all already..One day I will have the balls, I just hope it happens naturally or in a car accident first. If shit doesn't get any better...I really don't know anymore. Life is so unfair, how are some people happy and some never get an opportunity...I'm such a loser|
|10 Apr 2010||Sarian||y just under 13....im 24 n i feel i have nothing in my life...ppl around me think i have everthing going on, sum even go to the extent of extreme jealousy...but i feel, i am all alone. had a fe w BFs but the last one i was with, gave him everything...that i became so dependent on his love n approval...and just a few weeks ago, he said he hates me n doesnt care and love me anymore. i know this is a small deal for a lot of ppl, but to me, its a bog deal, because i was never accepted for who i really m....i never felt comfortable w any1, except for him.. and now, he says thinkg like he doesnt care or respect my feelings anymore, he wld rahter lie n spend time w friends than even c my msgs...i feel so lost in this world, i wish i cld take my life away (the only thing i have control off) but i can;t when i think of my mum, and bro and my dogs... i canl;t help falling into depression and crying each time i think abt how low i have gone...i hope i get tht strength to help me come out of these toughts..|
|07 Apr 2010||twiggs||I cant b r e a t h e. I dont want to. I dont understand: what did I do to everyone to make them resent me so much? I didnt mean to hurt anyone, if I did. I just want to know w h y everyone hates me. I guess its just because Im here in general. Its not my fault I was born. Its not my fault I loved him. Its not my fault that he left me. Its not my fault that my friends forgot about me. Its not my fault. He left me a year and four months ago. Almost a fucking year and a half. Im not even strong enough to let go. He doesnt love me. He didnt love me, even when he said he did. I still think about him e v e r y f u c k i n g d a y. for a god damn year and a half. Why does everyone leave? What did I do wrong? Im tired of always blaming myself for everything. Ive been thinking about it a lot, and I realized that its not my fault. Its everyone elses fault. Its their fault that I hurt so badly. Its their fault that Im alone. Its their fault that I have to put on a smile and lie every day. Its their fault I cant just end myself. End my pain. End my loneliness. Why cant they let me? P l e a s e. just let me die. I am so sick of this world. Theres nothing worth living for here. So why dont they let me? They just want me to hurt more I guess. Wow, I didnt know they hated me THAT much that they cant even let me die. The just want me to suffer. Im tired of sobbing silently; without anyone knowing. Im tired of keeping my pain all to myself. B u t, no one wants to be a burden. I dont want anyone to go through what I go through. To feel what I feel. No matter how much I hate them. Thats why I dont just end myself. I try to hold on for my family, whether they want me to or not. My dad killed himself. The year that he did, I started getting suicidal as well. No one knew about him & no one knows about me. So, you know that theory about how energy never dies but it just goes on from one form to another? [like when an animal eats a dead one and gets energy from it?]. well, what if the same thing happens to emotions? What if when you die, your emotions or energy goes to someone else? What if because my dad killed himself, his energy didnt die: it just went to me? Oh, god. I sound like a lunatic. Well, I kind of am one. Im high as hell and depressed as fuck. This should be fun.. (:|
|05 Apr 2010||laura||ok this is not why i came on here. I'm 42 yrs old- both parents suicide- my age 13 and 38. I feel seriously bad at the moment. I would appreciate contact from others who feel shitty and even suicidal. No one understands- let's help each other.|
|30 Mar 2010||mrxphatman||Why at 13 are you even considering this. I am married and have been for almost 16 years now, my marriage is falling apart, I am in debt so much I can't see the wood for the trees. My partner is taking our two kids back to her home country, she tells me she wants me to move out so that she can have her space. All this and I am so in love with this women that it destroys me when she tells me she cant stand me touching her. Trust me, I have and still am contemplating it as I can't see this pain ever ending. Right now I just live each day as it comes as I have no hope for my future.|
|21 Mar 2010||tom||you know that is my exact question and sadly i'm not joking i might be 15 years old but i don't think it makes such a diffrence, i'm looking for help.. for answers for my specific life maybe some one else can relate...|
|19 Mar 2010||todd||end my life i have lived all my life with learning and spelling disability all have for the rast of my life been suffering from depression im on a diabily pencehn all its had for be to do things like makeing my meals keeping my self clen any many more things been like this all my life and i am so tired of going on like this so my only way out of it is to end my life I have been whating to end my life for over 10 years and fell its time to and it all all be so happy when my life is over i know this what i want to do .as i post im 47 years old thank its a good time for me to die . need a good way to end it all|
|18 Mar 2010||Christine||I have no idea. I came here, trying to find out. I'm turning 15 in a few months, and my life seems perfect.
I have a beautiful girlfriend and loving friends.
My parents are constantly abusing me, emotionally now. They stopped physical a few years ago. They call me a whale. A freak. You name it. I'm not perfect. I may be heavy, but it's all muscle. I'm a fucking athlete.
My girlfriend drinks at school. She doesn't seem to care about me now. Once we were perfect. Once we actually talked. Once we cuddled, kissed, loved. No more. My friends do LSD at school. As much as I love helping their problems, they never listen to me anymore. When I need help, they dont care.
I have no one to turn to, no one to love. I want to die. I want to die. I want to die. I want to die. I want to die. I want to die.
Please. Help me find a way to stop this awful suffering.
Life's ticking by. Grain by grain. Tik. Tok. Tik. Tok.
So help me now. PLEASE. I'm desperate.
|18 Mar 2010||Maria||Hi, I am 16 and a female. I have been thinking about suicide from time to time ever since I was 13. It has increased during my 9th and 10th grade in high school. It went away for awhile but since November it has increased. Ever since I had my miscarriage on November 16th. I have never told my boyfriend about my suicidal thoughts. Nor my family, my dad suffered depression and had suicidal thoughts of his own. I have never talked to a psychiatrist either, I don't think I can tell my loved ones about this. I also do not think I can ever actually go through with the suicide. I have cut myself a lot when I was 13 and once in awhile during my current age. Little arguments with my boyfriend or mom can trigger these thoughts and cutting. This is not a pity story nor am I looking for sympathy. I just want help, without my loved ones knowing. I know this would destroy them. Please help me. I'm tired of feeling depressed and hatred of myself.|
|17 Mar 2010||rotten garbage.||i am rotten garbage. everything i've done and everything i'm doing and everything i'll ever do will always fail. because i am a failure. i cannot to anything properly. not even help people i love. i am just waste of space and oxygen and time. everything i touch turns to shit. every dream i try to make real, withers away before it's even conceived. every goal i try to reach leads me to another brick wall. every soul i attach myself to, abandons me. i am rotten garbage. just a heaping pile of rotten garbage. and people keep adding their trash to it, and it gets bigger and stinkier and more and more repulsive by the second. each breath i take is in vain. morning brings suffering. night brings anguish. i fogot i hadn't even the right to dream. i forgot my place in this world. for a little while i began to feel that there was hope for me...there was happiness for me....peace, love, comfort, warmth. lies. all lies. there is no love, no warmth, no comfort, no peace, no happiness, no hope for me. i will never be touched, never have my eyes looked into, never have my hand held, never have my forehead kissed, never be hugged, never be caressed, never have anyone to talk to, never have my hair tucked behind my ear, never whisper secrets in the dark, never come home to anyone, never be wanted, never be needed, never be given a chance, never be given a second chance, never be given a third chance. there is nothing and there will never be anything. i am rotten garbage. taking up space and oxygen. wasting people's time with my face and my voice and my mere existence. when i look in the mirror, when i open my eyes in the morning, when i lie in bed at night, when i hear my name...i will always know that i am garbage. i am rotten garbage. someone please set me on fire.|
|17 Mar 2010||jonathon||you should NOT (please don't) kill yourself if you're under thirteen. that said...i am 28 years old and am thinking about dying. a lot of people say that life has something to offer if you just keep waiting and keep fighting. but i feel so alone and resentful. often, i really wish my dad were still alive. he died when i was aged 23. it's strange how much i've grown since then, and yet i still feel like a child inside. i really wish my dad were still here so i could have some idea of who i am. yeah.
maybe i'm scared that i'll never be good enough to have a family one day. I always assumed I'd be dead by my mid-thirties (probably from suicide) so I haven't done much planning.
|17 Mar 2010||cloud||I cut myself last night. but as you can see ,it failed. i used a pen knife at first,but it soon appear to me that the skin is much thicker than i thought. after a while i used my scissors, which obviously wasn't sharp enough. but when i felt blood rushing down,i started to write a will and left my left hand bleeding. i tried to sleep it off, but i couldn't and thats when i realize the blood isn't flowing anymore. i gave few more strokes and move higher to the elbow.soon ,it was rushing down again. my dad found me after unlocking my door. im a female,17 ,athletic figure ,good grades, wide circle of friends. i think back when most of my frens said they wish they were me,and i don't understand why. in the hospital,the doctor questioned me like i was a criminal and said it was a crime to hurt yourself and would hand me over to the police if only i wasn't underage. my advice if you really confident and you know you will never regret it, do it hard and make sure it works, or you'll end up like me,dressings on my hand, lookin at website tryin to do i don't know what.|