What is the best way to commit suicide when you're under 13?

Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.

Date Name/email

Nom/email
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?

Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?

19 Oct 2004 Shaolin Monk 1)Pretend you are Goatse and stick a knife in your butt sex device.

2)Do a Fatality by repeatedly cutting your throat and your wrist. Do it quickly.

3)You shall die, and see the words "Game Over. LOL PWNED!! XD"

19 Oct 2004 Joe Momma tie a rope around your neck and then tie the other end to your father's car and then ask him to go pick up a bag of Doritos from the grocery and just sit on the front porch while watching the rope play out.

Yeah, that one is always pretty good.

19 Oct 2004 theroyalnonesuch Obviously, if you want to kill yourself when you are thirteen, you are going to want to involve as much wallowing, self-pitying, and attention getting as humanly possible.
First, you need razor blades for the token, "I tried to slit my wrists and take my life, but really only made a red welt" deal. Actually, on second thought, just throw in some rubber bands and a red pen.
Secondly, you need a re-fillable fountain pen and some anti-coagulates so that you will be able to write letters to your best friend in blood.
Thirdly, you need a bunch of trashy fashion magazines so you can develop an eating disorder, just for good measure. Also, some gallon-sized ziploc bags so you can leave bags of vomit sitting around for your old sister and mother to find.
Then you need some dashboard confessional and mae. You put the dashboard in your significant other's locker along with a bloody love note. Then, put the mae in your discman, and swallow the entire month of your mother's birthcontrol pills and use your puking and crying skills to show off to all the cool kids during passing period.

It's sure to put on a good show.

19 Oct 2004 mike SEPPUKU!

Step 1 Get a frisbee from the store or friend.

Step 2 Clean the Frisbee.

Step 3 Make sure your parents aren’t around

Step 4 Put something slippery on it, like butter or cream.

Step 5 Get really super pissed.

Step 6 Fold the Frisbee hard (this is crucial)

Step 7 Keep folded and insert Frisbee into mouth hard.

Step 8 Push hard until you can’t see it.

Step 9 Wait.

Step 10 Die.

For more information, refer to:

http://www.realultimatepower.net/index3.htm

19 Oct 2004 crazycarl go to the very top of the Sears tower. Tie one end of a VERY long rope to the top, and the other end to your penis. jump off. after a couple stories down, you wont mind hitting the ground as much.

19 Oct 2004 Get one of those lawn chippers like in fargo. you know what to do.

19 Oct 2004 Serious about death I think I would prefer to drown in a septic pool of my own urea and defaction gathered over the course of a few months, but that's just me.

18 Oct 2004 Sharing is caring Cop assisted suicide. Don't just end your misery by killing yourself, make someone else misirable too !

18 Oct 2004 Shit Eater I would drown myself in my own Urine. If I failed to die then I would plug up my nostrils and throat with endless amounts of human feces.

18 Oct 2004 JimmyTango Why not let someone rape you? That way you win because your whining, angsty, altogether annoying cunt of a self is dead, and some middle aged japanese businessman gets to fulfill his twisted desire of having a child deficate on his face while he jacks off with tabasco sauce.

18 Oct 2004 Joe Louie Tie a length of piano wire around your neck, and a slightly longer rope to your waist. Super-glue your hand to your head, and jump from a bridge at night. In the morning you will be found hanging and holding onto your own head. If you are feeling adventurous, replace the rope around your waist with another piece of piano wire and glue your other hand to your hip.

Guaranteed to get plenty of attention.

18 Oct 2004 Robert I think if you killed yourself while masturbating really hard woul dbe the best way, especially if you could shot the cum right when you die, die by either hanging yourself or jumping out a really high window/building and cumming right befreo you hit the ground would be really awesome

13 Oct 2004 idOcrEatING go out with style! grab a knife (or any weapon) and hold your worse teacher hostage. when the negotiators think you are about to let the teacher go, slice (or shoot) (or cave in) their head. Then proceed to the school toilets and repeatedly flush the chain to help drown yourself

05 Oct 2004 Jess play doctor and cut out your intestines for a regular checkup, it's fun and by the time you get them all back in you will have bleed to death

05 Oct 2004 Soul Searching For Relif look i seriously want to die if you have a good meathod plz contact me if not i will pay someone to off me we can arrange it so you wont get caught i have plenty of plans worked out i know its not much but ill be able to pay around a hundred in cash and leave out my atm card and tell and write the password so you will have acess to about another 1300 i have in my acount im just weak and dont have a reason to die but if i could have someone else do it that would be better plz contact me if you have good way to die that dosent take a lot of self will or if your willing to kill me or your just desprate enough for money plz hurry becuase im becoming more depraved everyday so rember if you waatn to help, need some easy money , or have a sugestion e-mail me at SRSsum1ne@hotmail.com plz only reply if your serious about helping me and if in the letter u want to put in the letter your joking to cover yourself incase sumones watching than thats okay but plz i hate life enough dont yank my chain thaks and hope you have a good life , or death if thats what you aspire to like me

04 Oct 2004 Cola a.k.a Ya know Have your friend pull you down a big hill with no cloths on and make sure the hill have alot of glass on it.

04 Oct 2004 Esteban Salmon Have sex with James Bond and contract every STD known to man, and a few others like Bond 1 and 2.

03 Oct 2004 Missie tie an extension cord to a post on your top story deck and tie the other end around your neck and sit on the railing and accidently fall over.

30 Sep 2004 suicide is funny the best way to kill yourself is definately by fucking a dead horse.

AHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!

why would that kill you?? well, it probably wouldn't, but GODDAMN I would laugh if someone actually did it!!!

Alternatively you could beat yourself with a giant tuna fish until you die... this may be difficult, becuase giant tuna fish are becoming rarer these days. Killing yourself with animals in general is a good way to go, because you might get on that show "when animals attack", which would be awesome!!!
Try molesting an angry rottweiler and see what happens. AHAHAHA!!!! It would bite your winky off!!! AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!
Hill-freakin-lerious!!

Suicide can actually be quite amusing really. Oh yeah, if you are going to kill yourself and you're pissed off with everyone around you, climb a powerline.
That way everyone around will lose there power after they go... that way when you die you get your revenge. Simple.

29 Sep 2004 muther fuckers The best way to kill yourself involves a fork, two teaspoons of salt, a blow up rubber sex doll, two tickets to Hong Kong and a large floppy black rubber cock.
However, as you are under thirteen, I can't tell you how to do it, as you are obviously too young. Have fun experimenting and trying to work it out!!!!!

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Date	Name/email Nom/email	What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13? Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
19 Oct 2004	Shaolin Monk	1)Pretend you are Goatse and stick a knife in your butt sex device. 2)Do a Fatality by repeatedly cutting your throat and your wrist. Do it quickly. 3)You shall die, and see the words "Game Over. LOL PWNED!! XD"
19 Oct 2004	Joe Momma	tie a rope around your neck and then tie the other end to your father's car and then ask him to go pick up a bag of Doritos from the grocery and just sit on the front porch while watching the rope play out. Yeah, that one is always pretty good.
19 Oct 2004	theroyalnonesuch	Obviously, if you want to kill yourself when you are thirteen, you are going to want to involve as much wallowing, self-pitying, and attention getting as humanly possible. First, you need razor blades for the token, "I tried to slit my wrists and take my life, but really only made a red welt" deal. Actually, on second thought, just throw in some rubber bands and a red pen. Secondly, you need a re-fillable fountain pen and some anti-coagulates so that you will be able to write letters to your best friend in blood. Thirdly, you need a bunch of trashy fashion magazines so you can develop an eating disorder, just for good measure. Also, some gallon-sized ziploc bags so you can leave bags of vomit sitting around for your old sister and mother to find. Then you need some dashboard confessional and mae. You put the dashboard in your significant other's locker along with a bloody love note. Then, put the mae in your discman, and swallow the entire month of your mother's birthcontrol pills and use your puking and crying skills to show off to all the cool kids during passing period. It's sure to put on a good show.
19 Oct 2004	mike	SEPPUKU! Step 1 Get a frisbee from the store or friend. Step 2 Clean the Frisbee. Step 3 Make sure your parents aren’t around Step 4 Put something slippery on it, like butter or cream. Step 5 Get really super pissed. Step 6 Fold the Frisbee hard (this is crucial) Step 7 Keep folded and insert Frisbee into mouth hard. Step 8 Push hard until you can’t see it. Step 9 Wait. Step 10 Die. For more information, refer to: http://www.realultimatepower.net/index3.htm
19 Oct 2004	crazycarl	go to the very top of the Sears tower. Tie one end of a VERY long rope to the top, and the other end to your penis. jump off. after a couple stories down, you wont mind hitting the ground as much.
19 Oct 2004		Get one of those lawn chippers like in fargo. you know what to do.
19 Oct 2004	Serious about death	I think I would prefer to drown in a septic pool of my own urea and defaction gathered over the course of a few months, but that's just me.
18 Oct 2004	Sharing is caring	Cop assisted suicide. Don't just end your misery by killing yourself, make someone else misirable too !
18 Oct 2004	Shit Eater	I would drown myself in my own Urine. If I failed to die then I would plug up my nostrils and throat with endless amounts of human feces.
18 Oct 2004	JimmyTango	Why not let someone rape you? That way you win because your whining, angsty, altogether annoying cunt of a self is dead, and some middle aged japanese businessman gets to fulfill his twisted desire of having a child deficate on his face while he jacks off with tabasco sauce.
18 Oct 2004	Joe Louie	Tie a length of piano wire around your neck, and a slightly longer rope to your waist. Super-glue your hand to your head, and jump from a bridge at night. In the morning you will be found hanging and holding onto your own head. If you are feeling adventurous, replace the rope around your waist with another piece of piano wire and glue your other hand to your hip. Guaranteed to get plenty of attention.
18 Oct 2004	Robert	I think if you killed yourself while masturbating really hard woul dbe the best way, especially if you could shot the cum right when you die, die by either hanging yourself or jumping out a really high window/building and cumming right befreo you hit the ground would be really awesome
13 Oct 2004	idOcrEatING	go out with style! grab a knife (or any weapon) and hold your worse teacher hostage. when the negotiators think you are about to let the teacher go, slice (or shoot) (or cave in) their head. Then proceed to the school toilets and repeatedly flush the chain to help drown yourself
05 Oct 2004	Jess	play doctor and cut out your intestines for a regular checkup, it's fun and by the time you get them all back in you will have bleed to death
05 Oct 2004	Soul Searching For Relif	look i seriously want to die if you have a good meathod plz contact me if not i will pay someone to off me we can arrange it so you wont get caught i have plenty of plans worked out i know its not much but ill be able to pay around a hundred in cash and leave out my atm card and tell and write the password so you will have acess to about another 1300 i have in my acount im just weak and dont have a reason to die but if i could have someone else do it that would be better plz contact me if you have good way to die that dosent take a lot of self will or if your willing to kill me or your just desprate enough for money plz hurry becuase im becoming more depraved everyday so rember if you waatn to help, need some easy money , or have a sugestion e-mail me at SRSsum1ne@hotmail.com plz only reply if your serious about helping me and if in the letter u want to put in the letter your joking to cover yourself incase sumones watching than thats okay but plz i hate life enough dont yank my chain thaks and hope you have a good life , or death if thats what you aspire to like me
04 Oct 2004	Cola a.k.a Ya know	Have your friend pull you down a big hill with no cloths on and make sure the hill have alot of glass on it.
04 Oct 2004	Esteban Salmon	Have sex with James Bond and contract every STD known to man, and a few others like Bond 1 and 2.
03 Oct 2004	Missie	tie an extension cord to a post on your top story deck and tie the other end around your neck and sit on the railing and accidently fall over.
30 Sep 2004	suicide is funny	the best way to kill yourself is definately by fucking a dead horse. AHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!! why would that kill you?? well, it probably wouldn't, but GODDAMN I would laugh if someone actually did it!!! Alternatively you could beat yourself with a giant tuna fish until you die... this may be difficult, becuase giant tuna fish are becoming rarer these days. Killing yourself with animals in general is a good way to go, because you might get on that show "when animals attack", which would be awesome!!! Try molesting an angry rottweiler and see what happens. AHAHAHA!!!! It would bite your winky off!!! AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!! Hill-freakin-lerious!! Suicide can actually be quite amusing really. Oh yeah, if you are going to kill yourself and you're pissed off with everyone around you, climb a powerline. That way everyone around will lose there power after they go... that way when you die you get your revenge. Simple.
29 Sep 2004	muther fuckers	The best way to kill yourself involves a fork, two teaspoons of salt, a blow up rubber sex doll, two tickets to Hong Kong and a large floppy black rubber cock. However, as you are under thirteen, I can't tell you how to do it, as you are obviously too young. Have fun experimenting and trying to work it out!!!!!