|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|09 Aug 2004||GOON||Move to California. West Nile is spreading like crazy here|
|03 Aug 2004||The best way to kill yourself if you are under thirteen is insert your penis (works best if you, in fact, have a penis) into a pencil sharpener and start humping it!!!!
AHAHAHAH!!!! The joy and agony of it!! Oh, the bitter, bitter irony!
Conversly, you can pretend you have mind-over-matter powers and go out onto the freeway and try to stop a truck with your mind. This could be quite amusing in the right circumstances.
|01 Aug 2004||kaniya||put a leather belt arond your neck make sure its on tight and pull and just keep pullin dont let go|
|30 Jul 2004||n/a||Wait until the person that has hurt you the most's birthday. buy a birthday card. write your suicide note in it. bring a cd player and play their favorite song on repeat. slit happy birthday into your wrists and hang yourself from a tree in their front yard|
|22 Jul 2004||Anarchy||Well, I would suggest walking into the school cafeteria, shooting everyone (make sure you get more than 20 people dead) and then blowing your head to bits with a 18-gauge shotgun. If you live in America, this stuff will be easy to get a hold of.
Oh and remember to tape the whole thing whilst broadcasting it live on the internet. Go out with a bang!
|14 Jul 2004||Mindy the fucking one who is your death||haa you fuckers want the best way to kill ur self under 13 okay... rip the beak off a fucking platapus embed it in ur chin, shove an adrvark up ur ass, take alot of clonapin thats pills u under aged fucks they blast macy grey music and pretend your a wonderful pretty pretty kiddie while performing open heart surgery on ur dumb weak ass replace ur heat with a piece of a camels toe if ur still alive why hasint the music killed you yeat... haha then come to realize your immortal and u cant die so u can live the process of killing yourself over agian. HOW SWEET!!! OH YEA U COULD FART ON THE POPE AND OFFER HIM A LEPER SANDWICH THAT COMES STRAIT FROM THE ISLAND OF DAECAY THEN TURN CANNIBAL AND EAT HIM< THAT WOULD CAUSE AN AWESOME RIOT FOR THOSE GOD FUCKERS!!!|
|12 Jul 2004||Harry Potter||Another good way is too take all your clothes off and run around going "look I can cast magic on my penis! It's grows!!"
Rub it against some old people for the best effect and tell them it's your 'magic wand'.
|12 Jul 2004||Harry Potter||The best way to kill yourself if you are under eighteen is go to the top of a building wearing a blue nightgown and pointed hat and put a broom between your legs and yell out "I'll get the damn Quaffle this time!!" and jump off!! Hil-fuckin'-larious!!|
|11 Jul 2004||dinesh||just put a pin or any metal in an electric socket, u will enjoy it|
|07 Jul 2004||AlreadyDead||Get naked, lay on the ground and pretend that you're a boat in the middle of the ocean while large whales are trying to attack you. After a while you'll realize how miserable you are and later you'll commit suicide so easily, smoothly like nobody before.
Good luck !
|07 Jul 2004||kill your self 420||run it to a wall and try to kill ur self and have ur mouth open!|
|05 Jul 2004||The best way to kill yourself (if you're a male) is to take a whole ton of viagra and then start drinking beer. Sooner or later your bladder will rupture and you will die!!!
Take photos!!! AHAHAH!!!!
I would piss myself!!! Get it?? "Piss" myself!!!
|05 Jul 2004||not for everyone||Tie yourself shut in a trash bag. Make sure you're at the curb where the trash people will pick you up. Or, Tie yourself shut in a trash bag, and just stay in there.|
|03 Jul 2004||Suddenly Susan||Botox over and over and over again, yeah! It's the right way!|
|29 Jun 2004||Anonymous||tell your brother you want to see how long you can hold your breathe. Tell him to hold you down no matter what you do.|
|28 Jun 2004||Tanen Kiriyami||Go look for spongebob square without scuba gear...forgetting to come up for air|
|27 Jun 2004||Tuba Ruba||Here's what you do. Go to Niagara Falls and jump over the falls. If you die, you die and you're happy. If you live, you'll be famous for surviving and you'll get lots of attention and shit. Niagara Falls isn't your cup of tea??? Do some other crazy ass impossible stunt, then if you survive, you'll be famous and whatever. So going out in a blaze of insanity is the best way to kill yourself, especially if you're under 13 because people will be even more amazed by your fucked up self if you survive some crazy ass stunt.
|24 Jun 2004||AlreadyDead||Always look on the bright side of life!
Don't worry, be happy!
Laugh at depression !
If you kill yourself your parents will cry because a funeral is very expensive.
Drink a glass of urine to attain instant-enlightment today!
|14 Jun 2004||CYKO-DISORDER||Suffocate yourself in a sandbox! oh oh oh! what about a nice plastic bag? ((SARCASM))OMG dude! your freakin sick! who would do that!?|
|11 Jun 2004||Robert Hamburger||Seppuku with a frisbee
Seppuku is the ancient art of killing yourself if you get super pissed and cant find anybody else to kill. Ninjas use all sorts of crap to kill themselvesguns, ropes, knives, lasers, spears, etc.and dont even think twice about it. These guys would kill themselves for just about any reason and often for no reason at all: thats why we there are so few ninjas today.
But if you want to commit Seppuku and youre like me, you dont have access to stuff like lasers. But theres hope. I tried to kill myself by swallowing a frisbee a couple of timesand believe me, its pretty cool. The only catch is you have to be really super pissed to do it.
Step 1 Get a frisbee from the store or friend.
Step 2 Clean the Frisbee.
Step 3 Make sure your parents arent around
Step 4 Put something slippery on it, like butter or cream.
Step 5 Get really super pissed.
Step 6 Fold the Frisbee hard (this is crucial)
Step 7 Keep folded and insert Frisbee into mouth hard.
Step 8 Push hard until you cant see it.
Step 9 Wait.
Step 10 Die.
If you succeed, everybody will be like Holy Crap!