|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|05 Jun 2003||jen||Ender..
don't do anything rash.. you sound like an intelligent person... I think you can rationalize this out... I was about to indulge in the pill popping side of this.. and actually everyone on this post helped me.. I was in the middle of taking pills and reading your stories made me understand there are other people out there like me. this is the first time i have been on this site and shit .. i think we ALL need help.. and my computer just froze twice . so I have had time to think about what i am saying and to re-write this many times and so i had to re-think it every time I wrote it and i am still in agreeance with myself (ha) but seriously i think that we need to to use this website to talk to each other for support.. cause now that i see the extent of it suicide may not be the answer i always thought is was.. I thought life was shitty and then shittier and that's all that happened.. but then all of a sudden there was hope.. and for sure.. you guys were my hope tonight apparently!! .. or else somethign may have happened..
and if anyone ever needs to talk please e-mail me!! I know things may seem hopeless but things pass, feelings pass. emotions pass, moments pass..
and to quote my favorite quote..
"I know all things are dfferent, that the things of the night cannot be explained in the day, because they do not then exist, and the night can be a dreadful time for the lonely people once their loneliness has started--
|30 May 2003||faaye||if anyone on this site wants to talk to someone who will genuinely care about you and will listen to everything you have to say then you can email me.|
|22 May 2003||Felicia - Your advice person||2-May 2003 -
Response to Liz.
Thirteen is a young age to think of suicide. But no matter, young or old, you should not think about this. Being a teenager is horrible, nonetheless. You are going through changes, mingling with peers, having to live to everyone's standards by being popular. Visualize yourself in the next five years after you graduate from High School and realize at such a precious age you have so much to look forward to. As for me, which was twenty two years ago, I had to struggle to get by in Junior High dealing with pesky 8th graders. It was horrible having to school everyday without the support of parents or peers. I was completely on my own, until I got involved in a music program with the school marching band. Yes, so it may seem geeky to some folks, and I am not advising you to join a marching band on the account of me, but there are so many programs to get involved in your school and so much counseling sessions to go to. Am I asking you to seek the assistance of professional help? No. But there are cheaper alternatives to deal with better subjects that involve outdoor activities or more.
Suicide is not the answer. It's only a false solution.
|06 May 2003||tonkin||right got to tell u all one thing. pills are most painful way to do ur self yeah. they destroy ur liver and u are still alive you will slowly die a painful death because ur body cant break down the poisons. well u think they can knock me out wrong. to those to take affect they have to go through ur liver to b prosseced through the body and with a fucked liver well pain pain pain... jump of a buildin u have fun fallin
...just tryin to help cos im not sucidal me just b very carfeull. and if you jump blow yourself up and that. think about the people who have to clean the mess up look at www.rotten.com to see the results on wot you look like when u commit suicide and wot mess they have to clean up. think of others than just yourself.
you want me to tell you wot happen when you commit suicide eg the pain involved and that like the pills and wot cleanin up and that mail me email@example.com dont b daft cos when u die there will always b pain
|03 May 2003||Anonymous||I'm not under 13 either but i have experience with suicide, i know this is not my place to say but suicide is not a good way to solve your depression.
I've tried different ways to kill myself and they're all painful, there is no painless way in the world to ever die and remember that.
please talk to someone about your problems if you can't seem to find a way out. and you really have to remember that your sadness will go away; you will never ever feel this bad again once you learn how horrible death will actually feel.
death is painful, there is no higher pain.
|02 May 2003||Felicia-Your Advisor, The Next Dear Ann Landers||Dear Depressed 24/7
You know, if you feel you are leery about being infected and money is not the option at the moment, please go to the nearest Planned Parenthood center for a diagnosis. This will clear your conscience through your horrible crisis, and give you back your sense of self worth. Violence in the streets is ever so prevalent in this world as well as at home. Feeling entrapped or entrapment, the feeling of being caught between the devil and the deep blue sea can drive one to deep depression. I support you through your hardship with sincerity. Please be gentle to yourself, and for the both of us, give yourself a hug. Realize that with every gray cloud in the sky, there is a silver lining.
As for the life of your two year old, please understand that contemplating on killing yourself is not a solution. A two year old needs his or her mother. A two year old without a mother is the greatest sadness in the world. Whether or not you have a disease, doesnt mean life should end. If you are unable to handle life in general, seek the help of a friend or close relative. If all options are unavailable, come back to this site and have a talk with me, or talk to a suicide crisis center, because living the pain of living life on your own can be very scary. Hold strong to your convictions that all misery will soon pass and believed that things could only change for the better only if you allow it to
Being isolated from friends who believe you have something contagious were not friends to begin with. A friend is one who sticks by you no matter what the circumstance is. Make new friends; get involved in organizations that support the less unfortunate. I found that volunteer work helping others has opened my eyes to other possibilities, and gave me additional help by just word of mouth, especially with your circumstance. If this is not for you and you feel there is never time, suicide should not be your option. Stare the fear out and have faith in yourself. Dont believe the negative jargon that you hear, but stay with the positive. Stay away from negative people from now on.
This is not the end, but the beginning.
- Sincerely - Felicia
|30 Apr 2003||Felicia - Your advising Angel||Dear Ender Wiggen,
Thats no problem. Im glad you had the chance to stop by. I guess you read a few of my posts and realized that I gave more than my fair share of advice. If not, then you probably read through some funnier material in the favorites section of the Mouchette boards involving Lucy Cortina and Billy the Freak. But for you to come here for some suggestions, I am going to lend a pair of open eyes seriously.
When you feel pent up it is always best to talk to a stranger. Especially the ones who have experienced your situation.
Its ironic at times. It seems that psychiatric help is just going to meeting sessions and pouring out your heart. Then you pay the listeners for listening to you and they give you medication for it. One or two hour sessions are not enough to eliminate your pain. Now I am not saying that psychiatric help is hopeless, I do agree that it is alright to have therapy, but you need to be picky by going to a trusted professional with great credentials. The same goes for looking for a great mechanic. Chose your helpers wisely and remember not to always give handouts to those who hunger for your loose change sad to say, its not always the homeless that ask for handouts or value meals.
Dont down yourself out in being a geek. I think geeks are cool. Many beautiful men and women like the sophisticated smart types. Sci-Fi games and science looked down by "normal" or "cool people"? I know of a drug dealer who loves to watch Star Trek, Star Wars, and Quantum Leap. He also plays Dungeons and Dragons for all hours of the night, and is still a bit of a shady character. His friends consider him cool and normal. As for me, I think he is a narcissistic sociopath with a cool smart guy appearance? I once dated him and he broke up with me because I was like a sheep to him. He changed his name to Scott. (Apologies to Scott Bakula) I have a nickname for him.... Scott Evil.
My suggestion though. Dont get evil. Its the silent, smart types that worry me.
And the people that scoff at you for being a typecast geek. Tell them they have issues that they should tend to themselves and to M.T.O.B. Some people never take the time to gather their thoughts and throw judgment to others and themselves way too quickly.
Drugs, even prescribed, can sometimes be hazardous to our system, even if it starts to makeone feel good. The main cure for all these disorders is exercise, eating well, and running with the dog on the beach (Well, thats only if you have a dog.). If you are sitting in front of a computer terminal too long, blood starts to coagulate; you lose brain function through blood loss and have a tendency to get really depressed.
The blood and your engine need to get moving. Endorphins, nature's natural drug can do wonders every time. I swim in the pool every morning and run. My therapist gives back rubs and great tips on health. Okay, so it sounds expensive, but you can run for free and it doesnt cost a dime, except for the expensive pair of Nike Running shoes and sore muscles. Honestly, they are cheaper than prescriptions.
Stay away from the placebos and use them as decoration in the office cube. If a fellow office workercomes about and is curious about them, have them take a few, and tell them to come back for more if there are no results.
Dont consider that your friends that never contact you are unkind. Friends are really hard to find nowadays. Hmmm Sounds like a Karen Carpenter song. Well if your friends never returned your calls just consider it their loss and concentrate on you.Perhaps they have issues to deal with and are too involved with other new things in their lives. Make new friends because you cannot have too many friends in this world.
Its only natural that it takes time to get to know people. That proves that you are not fake. Getting to know people is very wise in the health department and money smart. Just a note, if you first meet someone, such as a blind date, and they try to borrow money from you right away from them flee flee... far away.
I worked for a large company too and got laid off. Dont blame it on yourself that the economy is bad.
The economy is bad, period. I decided to go for freelance writing and getting published and doing part time work here and there. The only way you can make it big is buying stock (which I dont think is wise right now) or thinking up an invention or a song lyric that comes to your mind. Look at some of the groups nowadays. They write musical lyrics with depressing words in it, and later, it becomes a big hit. Dont ever think that you are not musically inclined. At 34 going on 14, I am thinking about taking piano lessons.
My friend you are not alone in this world of woes. It seems that suffering is an ongoing process which never stops. I for one can understand that even if you are succeeding, something always steps in the way. Just now I got a rejection note from a part time job in the mail. And a rejection note from a publishing company, and more rejections. I can write forever about my failures and rejections.
1.) I got rejected from Macys because I was too over qualified.
2.) A 30-year-old drug dealer rejected me.
3.) I once lived with a bitchy roommate and had to spend time taking care of a feisty, geriatric mother. Now I dont live with the bitchy roommate.
4.) My car registration needs a change of address.
5.) I need an oil change.
6.) I feel bummed that I gained back ten pounds.
7.) My Micrel stock is plummeting.
8.) Im a starving artist.
9.) Applied 100 times, replies 0.
10.) I telemarketed for a garbage company and recently got canned.
11.) I am not in love with the guy I am with and love somebody else.
If you feel that you are at the end of your rope. Try this method. Dont over analyze your life. Never conform to the standards of this world. Just be you. Take the time to walk and gulp in a breath of fresh air. Look at the stars at night and remember that billions upon billions of these stars are both over our heads, and the shooting ones are the ones you make wishes upon. If you are way too analytic and not into this mushy stuff. Write a journal of your thoughts and begin with I have every right to be here as much as anybody else and there is so much to life that I didnt experience and never go to do". Think of that one thing that means something to you and do it, despite the boundaries. Suicide is not the suggestion though but living life is.
Never be sorry about your lengthy post. It is okay to fear the unknown and be reassured that loneliness can be broken if you start opening up to theirs.
Things to do if you want to begin (These are just suggestions):
1.) Take up piano lessons.
2.) Fold Origami
3.) Take up surfing (Dont drown)
4.) Skydiving (Have a good parachute)
5.) Learn to cook
6.) Clean the house
7.) Read up on a good science fiction book
8.) Think up an invention
9.) Help an unfortunate one
10.) Adopt a pet
11.) Learn to fix cars
12.) Update your hard drive
13.) Set up a goal list.
16.) Take a nap
17.) Glass blowing
19.) Setting up an e-bay account
20.) Listening to positive music
21.) Good Spiritual cleansing
25.) Swimming (Dont drown please!)
26.) Sun bathing
28.) Take classes
29.) Call your parent
30.) Eat at your favorite restaurant
31.) Go to Tower Records
32.) Build a Model rocket kit
33.) Buy a telescope
34.) Burn cds
35.) Throw away your weight scale
36.) Join a marathon
37.) Go on dates , be a mentor, and the list goes on.
I hope this advice helps you along the way. Good luck and think positive. I remember that you are trully are not alone in this world.
|14 Apr 2003||Mr Mystery||Hey everyone, I've been getting a few responses for help, that's great.
If you want to talk, or just have someone to tell your story to and give advice, give me an e-mail.
|14 Apr 2003||mark||Hey, life is a journey. We all have a personal legend that we can follow if we choose to. Most people don't want to deal with finding out the truth of life because it can be scary. The truth is the scariest thing for everybody. The truth that i'm talking about has nothing to do with what kind of person you are, if others like you, etc. The only truth that makes sense is that there is no good and bad in the world. Only our judgments make things good or bad. One of the greatest ones is that no one else has any power over our lives. We are the only ones who can decide to do or feel anything. We have just grown up in a society that has approved blaming other people for our unhappiness. We are the ones in control of our lives. It is hard to admit it, it is easier to just blame others for our shortcomings and unhappiness than to persuing what we really desire. It is ourselves that make life look impossible, not anyone else. If you would like to find out more about living life in a whole different way, e mail me. I support you in what ever it is that you want, because any dream or desire you have is open for your taking. Thanks for reading what i wrote. I am going to be in the Colorado area next year so talk to me. maybe we can go play in the snow. --Mark|
|09 Apr 2003||MrMystery||Staciey, aka sai, you're e-mail is full, I want to talk to you.
Here's my message to you:
"You say you are afraid of people, then why share your feelings on the internet, with 100's of 1000's of people online at all times.
I think inside you want to talk, and that you don't want to kill yourself. So I have an offer for you, talk to me and in return I'll tell you the best painful / not painful way to die.
Fair trade, give me a chance :) "
E-mail me: firstname.lastname@example.org
|08 Apr 2003||MadMan||No serious, suicide is a bad thing to do. I knew wrist slitters, and pill poppers, and a guy that tried like 10 times! Okay.
You want to talk, then the best person to talk to is a stranger, but a nice one, not some crazy stalker dude. Just find some guy / girl online and just talk to them, most people are very nice an open online, and can help you deal with problems just by giving advice.
So gimmie a hollar if you need help, by the way, make the e-mail subject something with a key word like HELP, or TALK TO ME, all in uppercase, or I may discard it with the millions of junk mail I get.
Peace, live life to its fullest, and enough every moment even on the worst day of your life.
|05 Apr 2003||sarah||suicide though however glorious or right it might seem, in the end, will never amount to what you're trying to do. if you're doing out of vengence, what the point if you're the one suffering in the end. if you want it for yourself, when you're alive, at least your mind can help you escape, but in death it's an eternity that may be far worse than what is here on earth. why bother, live out your life and prove those assholes who put you down wrong. they are not worth it. you're the only that matters!!! and OD is a very bad idea. if you don't die, the hospital and so called mental help is a bitch. all they do is sedate you till you die on the inside. get real help if you need it, but don't make a decision when your upset. im me if you like or email me at email@example.com i be here, i might not be able to help you, but i'll be here if you want someone to listen|
|13 Mar 2003||Alan||Look, dont do it. Get angry. Every single human being, no matter what their status.. when you get angry you can change things. That doesn't mean you have to go kill some innocent people, it means you have to get fired up, to not hide away, to get out, get pissed off and tell people exactly how you want things to change.
Rob a bank, steal cars, rip-off hotels, stow away on ships, become an illegal alien in a different country, find a partner... do anything but end your life, you won't get another... shit, people! It changes, it gets better, it's not all bad.
Even if nobody loves you, fuck 'em, you don't need people to love you. No one has ever loved me in my life, I've just been shit on, used, ignored, laughed at, but I don't care anymore. I'm doing my own thing, turning things around... trying things I never thought I could try. Like motocross. I was nearly 20 stones heavy at one point, now i'm just over 14 and riding motorbikes is an amazing thing for me. I get to do lots of things now, I still have next to no money, but I'm working on that as well.
You don't need other people to feel sorry for you. If someone you loved has left you, why feel sorry for them? A guy I knew, so in love with his girlfriend that when she left him he killed himself. Her response? Well, no remorse, she was more concerned with how much she could get for his mobile phone and belongings! A man, a human being with a mother and father, dead... took his life in a final act of love and she JUST DIDN'T CARE. So what was the point? Maybe now, a year later, he would be over it, met someone else and be living a LIFE his mother gave him. Not buried somewhere and forgotten about while she shags around.
I came close to suicide, contemplated life, how crazy this fuckin world is, how people always have a knack of bringing you down, being arrogant. Then I realised, that *is* life, it's a game and I LOVE games. So now I play the game and it's FUCKING FUN! If I ever get really down I will just rob a bank and go crazy (not hurt anyone because now I value other people's right to life whoever they are). But man, if I was going to go out, I would do it in style and not just roll over like a wimp.
Sometimes we all want a bit of attention, a cuddle, love, friends... and they are all out there no matter who you are, black white gay str8. My body... it's a wreck, I have stretch marks all over and I dare not be naked around people- it probably means I will never in this life be in a relationship with another person. Ok, that's bad, I kinda hoped I would be in love and live happily ever after... but I'm over that. I can work on close relationships with other people, enjoy my life through them and their families. If I get success I will help kids and people like myself in any way I can. Love, it comes in many different forms you know- for me, I wanted to die because I needed love, I found someone who i thought loved me and I let myself go for them emotionally, but it didn't work :o(
I'm a big boy now, I'm so glad I didn't end it. Please don't you do it, if I said to you that I would do anything to help you bring your life around would you believe me? Because I would, every life is sooo damn precious, can't you see?
Please don't do it :o( And I'm not some do-gooder tree hugging fucker, I'm quite the arsehole actually heheheh, but deep down I guess I am soft, I just wish everything would work out for everyone and I'm sure it could for you too. E-Mail me if you want to try me for size, I'll do what I can... I really appreciate life now.
One guy once told me when I was a teen- life is about experiences, and it really is, both good and bad. Once you realise that you can take either as they come.
Good luck, I know it's shit sometimes listening to people like me rant about positive views when you just are soo pissed off with the tedious bullshit this world dishes out. And believe me, it's is a fuckin headache- but that's other peoples jobs to sort out, politicians, mayors, councillors. Our job is to have a bit of fun and let the rest of it go to shit. Hey ...if we end up getting vaporized in a nuke, well... life's a bitch, not many people can say they got nuked... stick that in your pipe n schmoke it fuckers!
|11 Mar 2003||Kate||Trust me on this... trying to overdose on pills or anything else is probably one of the most painful ways you could possibly die. I've tried it before and if you're looking for a painless way out that is not the way to go... I'm just posting this because I don't want anyone to have to suffer. Contact me if you'd ever like to chat or anything...|
|04 Mar 2003||Felicia - Your Guardian Angel||Dear Lydia,
I know that in life, we feel entrapped by discouragement and despair in this world. Because the economy is so bad, its even too expensive to ask for Dr. Kevorkians much needed assistance and its hard to find which pill to end never-ending turmoil. We all live through these horrible feelings each day and its maddening. Watching, reading the news, and countless evenings viewing American Idol doesn't help either. Living life under the scrutiny of a not so understanding family environment, unsupportive peers with toxic thoughts, is entrapment and emotionally draining. There is only one option that you and I can seek. That is to have peace amongst ourselves. We try to go through life trying to seek the approval of others but we shouldnt let it go too far by contemplating on taking our own lives. Its a family or friend issue that must be resolved and misunderstandings between you and them should be nipped in a bud. As you know, feeling hopeless and incompetent results from the lack of communication.
First, find something in your heart that means something to you, like your goals and dreams by making it happen. Second, observe your surroundings, such as purchasing a personal journal or scratch pad, hide it under lock and key, and remembering to write down good thoughts: Lifetime goals short term/long term, positive quotes, pros/cons and future dreams. Refer back to it whenever you get depressed, just to lift your spirits. Throw in a few funny comics, pictures or write positive or true to life quotes from your favorite book, our your very own poem. Make jewelry. Start a fashion design trend, take pictures of the boys you like, first ask for their permission though, if they refuse, go to the next boy that you like. Have many positive contacts and friends overseas, but be sure to choose your chat mates wisely.
Don't react. Think first and take a deep refreshing breath of fresh air outside. At this time, get busy and occupy your thoughts with positiveness, by observing the beauty outside that surrounds you and within rather than being negative and being down. Because... in the future you will find someone to love and they will find you. Give that special person a chance, and first begin with you.... Always.
This day is the beginning chances are always blessings.
|20 Feb 2003||Michael Mackellar||Kim might find the help that is needed by listening to SLEEPING PILLS by a band called LONDON SUEDE.|
|19 Feb 2003||Felicia - Your Guardian Angel in Disquise||Dear Suicide Note XXX,
I can relate to the pain you are going through when you feel life isn't worth living. Take for example my mother. She lives life everyday being feisty and old making everybody's life a living hell. Unable to take her med's and being incontinent doesn't help either. Anyways, when you don't know what is going on and have no clue why you are here, there are two things that you need to figure out. One, you are either losing your mind because of a handicap that you can't help, and two, you are pushing yourself to lose your mind by telling yourself that you are a failure. Number two is your category my dear and that you can help, and please forgive me if you feel that I am being judgemental. To be honest with you, you have too much time on your hands. Get busy and do something instead of wallowing about killing yourself. Have you ever thought of volunteering in helping those who are unfortunate? Believe me, these people have nothing to live for and need a helping hand. They have nobody... nobody at all. There are no family and friends visiting, except for the physical therapist, the occasional doctor, and the nurse. That is why I am visiting and taking care of my mother, because she has nobody to take care of her, except me, my brother, and my mother's brother. Through countless arguing and ranting and raving, we care about mom. Besides with all this talk about war, the world can end tomorrow. So you see, why kill yourself? Live everyday like it was the first day of the rest of your life, and if it is hard to bear then think about helping others. For this you reap tons of friends. Gosh, you got me and I haven't even met you yet. Okay, how about this, I am going to yell at you. STOP THINKING OF KILLING YOURSELF! YOU'RE NOT CRAZY! YOU HAVE FRIENDS!! STOP DRINKING SO MUCH, IT'S BAD FOR YOU!! DON'T KILL YOURSELF BECAUSE THERE IS A PURPOSE WHY YOU ARE HERE.... STOP IT!! Stop thinking of killing yourself... Stop it, stop it....Stop it!!!
I haven't met you, but you're well liked so get over it. Besides who am I going to write to?
|15 Jan 2003||Felica - The Guardian Angel||Though I've pointed out that committing suicide is stupid and tried convincing others that they would be missed would not apply to everybody, but I know for sure that killing oneself is a pseudo-solution and the effect of this action on others is a stark reality, as well as a fact.
As far as being different, whether it is a sexual preference, a lifestyle choice, or you committed a heinous crime, we all know that it is simply not right to be judged at all. Nevertheless, we have to think of the consequences, whether it'd be good or bad, and how it would effect whatever happens in the present. Since individuals like you take the time to look into this website for relief, you definitely know the difference between good and bad. We are old enough and intelligent to realize that whatever we choose or chose to do, we are held accountable and are indeed responsible for our own actions. Mostly, we can blame our parents for our downfalls and take it out on the injustices of this society by "doing away" with ourselves. But realize that being born into this "world of woes and the fear of the unknown" is not our fault. We are born and put in this world for a purpose, and whether or not you do not believe so, ACCEPT IT! You have every right to be here like everybody else!!!
In taking responsibility for the caring of others, whether it be sibling, parent, friend, relative, spouse, loved one, or even foe, it may seem that those who need us and who are supposedly "hanging from a thread , need our help. We cannot help those who are clinging to us for dear life if we are not emotionally healed ourselves. Our burdens on ourselves are way too big to handle and it is emotionally draining... especially, ESPECIALLY, if we live with unsupportive parents or families.
Before you decide in attempting your destiny and finding pseudo-solutions to kill yourself, stop first... On a clear night, go outside, don't forget to take a jacket, look up at the sky and stars, take a gulp of fresh air and exhale slowly. Remind yourself that you count just as much as those stars above you and again that you have every right to be here whether you believe it or not. If you are confined in a cell with no outlet of the sky whatesoever, think of the night sky and stars because they are still there. Even if you took a life of another or attempted murder, though I don't condone it (that's my opinion) you still matter. Though you feel as though you need to be punished for the injustices that you done, you still matter. Even if you chose a different mode of living and have a different lifestyle, you still matter. If anybody, friend, parent, foe, sibling, or loved one, thinks otherwise, and they verbally and physically abuse you, tune them out, BECAUSE, that's not what you are and that is their opinion, not yours. If you are entrapped by these people under violent conditions, take refuge immediately because that is not love. Report this to the authorities and ask to seek shelter in a safe place. I am not convincing you to be a runaway either, but if you are being verbally or physically abused and entrapped or confined, this is not a form of love, it is an act of manipulation and violent behavior. You shouldn't be harmed in any way or form and you shouldn't have to live in that hell hole. Don't have people tell you that you're hopeless and be subjective to hurtful words. Again, don't believe it, and understand it is not true. You are who you are, believe in you. Take that first step, rather than killing yourself. Save yourself first... Please!!! You only have one body in this lifetime and think of the opportunities and memories you would jeopardize if you do such an act. Your reaction is "Don't REACT so suddenly!" Think first! Ask yourself a question in why you are doing this, write or type it down, and again, think! Exhale, enhale... BREATH. Write or type down a list of "pros" and "cons". Find ways to resolve the "cons". Don't hyperventilate and dwell only on negativity. Get busy! Occupy your mind with other things that make you happy (I do not require drugs or booze, okay?!) rather than committing a selfish act.
And remember, whether you believe it or not... you are loved.
-Read below under Felicia - The Guardian Angel for more input.
|30 Dec 2002||Felicia - Your Guardian Angel||What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13? What is the best way to kill yourself when you are 25, 35, or 59 years of age? My advice, don't try. I myself have tried to commit suicide with Geritol pills at age 14, but something was holding me back. In a span of five minutes, my parents knocked on the door to check up on me. Feeling foolish, I spat the pills out. Down the road of life, which was soon extended after I spat out the pills, I've seen people kill themselves for pure enjoyment to get back at the world, to die because life was an unjust cause and they rather not live in it. To be brutally honest, there was some people that I knew who were convinced to do themselves in, and I didn't care. I labeled them as messed up, drugged out, or "demonically possessed" to some degree, but after they attempted it, I felt lost. For some reason, these people did matter to me. The cause of them killing themselves was usually over the main reason, rejection over a guy or a girl, an abusive parent or sibling, drug usage, a lost loved one, or the worst enemy, money. In talking about this, lately I felt like doing myself almost a week ago over the rejection of two men. But I ask myself, "Why?" I keep telling myself this that no guy or girl is worth your time if they treat you like crap or never give you the time of day. Does it hurt them that they left you? Sometimes, but who cares what they think? We're focusing on you and me. Let's continue. I went back in time I witnessed my best friend's brother kill himself slowly with alcohol or distilled spirits over his ex-wife. I saw him lying on the hospital bed with his eyes open, laying dormant and stiff in a vegetative state. Surrounding him were his family and friends. My best friend told me "if only" she could have spent more time with her brother and shared her drawings of Palm Trees with him again. I'm not joking. They both loved Palm Trees and paintings of them, but unfortunately it was too late. I sat in the lobby seeing all the relatives cry and friends, true friends of him. Did I burst out in tears with the rest of them? No. I hardly knew the guy. But underneath, I felt the sufferring, the harshness of someone killing themself slowly. What was worst was seeing everybody, especially my best friend crying incessantly, and singing songs my best friend's brother wrote. Everybody was anticipating the outcome of this musician. There were incidences that I heard from the doctor that my best friend's brother was bleeding from the lungs and losing his liver. His inner organs were damaged. Did it bring satisfaction? No. It hurt knowing that someone I hardly knew was clinging on for dear life and I couldn't do anything about it. That's when I began to care. My best friend's brother died seven days later. That was a week after Thanksgiving in 1999. It didn't make me feel good. It haunts me to this day. Just last year again, my best friend's second brother committed suicide by hanging self by a noose over a girl. What's this? Another escape? No it's not. It leaves others like myself and my best friend wreathing in pain after a death was unnecessarily committed. While you sit there with that knife, that noose, or those pills, or even a razor blade, you're not only killing yourself. You are also killing everybody that you love or those that love you. That's why you and I need to think! Just think first! As we lay on our beds and start breathing, even though the pain in our chest and our body aches from the deep hurt we must live. Before you decide to take your life, come back to this website and send an email before contemplating your own destiny. The mouchette.org/suicide people will try their best to respond or give a few words. Or give someone you love a hug. If no one is around you to give you a hug, hug your lap top or computer, because the other person behind the wire that wrote this is me. I am real and I am not phony. If I feel a sudden force of warmnest, I know it is you. Just know that you are loved at this very moment.|
|28 Nov 2002||Rodrigo||Some things are beyond words, beyond comprehension, beyond forgiveness. I use to think that once i had succeeded in ending my life that no guilty conscious could possibly exist, so why not just do it and get it over with ??? I still mourn the random death of innocents; the death of innocents and the death of innocence. From the day i first drew breath, i stood alone, seperate, without love, without family, without hope. Nothing is more unpredictable as life, and change can strike like lightning. I always wonder about the life i've missed.... bravery just isn't enough is this world.
I'm not going to be the guy you blame for ruining your life, your choices are your own, the future is not fixed.
Things don't always turn out the way you plan, no matter how hard you try and it's sometimes for the best, even if it means sacrificing a little beauty, to safeguard the beauty that already exists.
It's so hard to find the strength to do what's right, but my resolve is greater then ever.
I find that u people have all the potential in the world and not the first idea how to use it
So go ahead and do whatever it is u want to do to yourselves, i can't stop you if that's what you really want.
"A LITTLE DARKNESS NEVER HURT ANYBODY"
It's funny how u can see someone everyday but not really see them
Dying is easy, Living is hard
Believe me, i wish i could just wish away my felings, but i can't. This is the only thing i can do for you people.
SO the question is how long are u people going to keep running away from ur problems ???????? firstname.lastname@example.org