|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|29 Jul 2005||Grandma Goth in Killer Heels||I don't know what brought me back to the site today - I went through a brief period of being fixated with it about 18 months ago. Thought it was for real and ended up having nitemares about kids committing suicide and stuffed animals with striped penises... I always did have an overactive imagination but dropped out of art college to "go on the road" after a term!!!
I stand by what I said about there being some middle aged bloke behind this orchestrating the whole thing. BUT I've yet to see the film "Mouchette", and I know exactly what it's like to be so touched by a piece of art you want to go on to create something of your own.
I'm a writer and work from life, but believe that art imitates life (and maybe vice versa) so it all evens out somewhere.
It's difficult to think of the kids when the kids are only thinking of themselves. But anyway, peace love and empathy to all. Hope we all get better soon, huh?!
|25 Jul 2005||Why should they care when I die, when they never cared when I lived|
|15 Jul 2005||Lucy Cortina||Chorus:
I'be got brains in my boobies
I've got brains in my boobies
I've got brains in my boobies
Mouchette put them there
He now controls my boobs,
after a little operation.
The can float, they can inflate;
they're the world heavyweights.
Everyone is jealous,
cos Mouchette's inside my boobs.
He now gets all his pleasure
living inside my boobs
*repeat chorus x 2*
The world cries "where is Mouchette?!" "where is Mouchette?!"
Nobody knows, nobody cares,
for his brains are in my boobies, my boobies boobies bobies.
Mouchette is here, there's nothing to fear,
for his brains are in my boobies;
and my boobs will go on..and on.....
*chorus x 2*
My boobs want to explode,
when Mouchette is having sex.
No one knows how he does it,
he has a lovely pair of brains!
They could destroy the world,
so must must stay inside my boobies
Mouchette's brains are too big
so they must stay inside my boobies
*chorus x 2*
His brains must stay incide my boobies.
|02 Jul 2005||Guest who||i have also been intimadated by people every where i go:
to frighten or threaten someone, usually in order to persuade them to do something that you want them to do:
- They were intimidated into accepting a pay cut by the threat of losing their jobs.
frightened or nervous because you are not confident in a situation:
- Older people can feel very intimidated by computers
- The campaign of violence and intimidation against them intensifies daily.
making you feel frightened or nervous:
- an intimidating array of weapons
- an intimidating manner
- She can be very intimidating when she's angry.
also i have been
unkind words or actions that make someone or something look stupid or worthless:
- She was treated with scorn and ridicule by her colleagues when she applied for the job.
- He's become an object of ridicule (= a person that everyone thinks is stupid and criticizes or laughs at).
to laugh at someone in an unkind way:
- She rarely spoke her mind out of fear of being ridiculed.
- At the time he was ridiculed for his ideas.
stupid or unreasonable and deserving to be laughed at:
- Do I look ridiculous in this hat?
- Don't be so ridiculous! I can't possibly afford to go on holiday.
- It's ridiculous to expect a two-year-old to be able to read!
- Hotel rooms in the city are ridiculously overpriced during the festival.
|29 Jun 2005||THIS PISSES ME OFF||Mouchette, why the fuck aren't any of my answers in your favourites section???!! I have worked so damn hard on those posts and I have done everything I could possibly do to contribute to this fucking sick and perverted site. If I ever see you, I will flatten you like a waffle with my fly squatter you dirty freak!|
|26 Jun 2005||Rare-Me||in indonesian language..S.o.r.r.y..
dari umur 11 tahun saya ingin bunuh diri karena merasa terasing dan tersiksa secara fisik oleh orangtua sy. Penderitaan saya bertambah ketika seseorang yang saya sayangi meninggal. Saya tidak mengenal arti cinta kasih dari manusia di dunia ini. Ketakutan menghadapi dunia luar setiap hari dan kebencian bila bertemu orang tua saya membuat rasa sakit di hati dan pikiran saya semakin besar dan meradang hingga sekarang. Setiap hari,bila rasa sakit itu datang,dengan membayangkan menembak tepat ke kepala, saya merasa lebih baik. saya ingin punya pistol sesungguhnya,karena dengan memiliki itu saya merasa kuat karena bisa benar-benar mengontrol sakit saya. Saya tinggalkan teman-teman terdekat saya karena mereka tidak bisa memahami saya. Saya sendiri dan hidup menyendiri di dunia ini.Saya tidak memiliki suatu hubungan yang berarti dengan semua orang yag ada di sekitar saya sekarang ini. Saya sungguh ingin mati. Mati dengan menembak kepala saya. semakain lama sakit yang saya alami semakin menjadi. i need a gun..
|18 Jun 2005||life is not all I hate.||I hate every activity I do throughout the day. right down to posting this thread. i am so self loathing and just plain miserable. i am so depressed i dont even want to kill myself. why even get up out of bed. why get dressed? why eat? why cant I just DIE?
someone please email me and tell me if you feel like me? firstname.lastname@example.org
I hate myself. i hate my mom and my whole family. and i fuckin hate this salad i am eating. who the hell is cesar anyway?
|07 Jun 2005||LIFE: AIN'T NO CAKE WALK...||TOP 10 REASONS FOR NOT KILLING YOURSELF:
1) YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO WATCH PARIS HILTON GROW OLD.
2) YOU WON'T SEE HOW MANY TIMES BRITNEY SPEARS GETS MARRIED...
3) YOU'LL NEVER KNOW IF THE BACK STREET BOYS REUNITE..
4) YOU'LL MISS OUT ON THE NUCLEAR HOLOCAUST, IE: ARMAGEDDON
5) YOU'LL MISS OUT ON ACTUALLY GETTING OLD, (THINK THINGS SUCK NOW?)
6) YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO FALL IN LOVE...
7) YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO HAVE YOUR HEART BROKEN BY THE ONE PERSON YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD COUNT ON.
8) YOU'LL NEVER KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE YOU HURT WITH THE AFFLICTION YOU LEAVE BEHIND...
9) YOU'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO REALIZE HOW MANY POOR SOULS FIGHT FOR THE RIGHT TO LIVE, WHILE YOU CAN'T SEEM TO MAKE UP YOUR MIND...
10) YOU'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO LOOK BACK ON YOUR LIFE AND SAY, "IM A SURVIVOR"
|26 May 2005||jago||One day i became a little girl. I loved my life as her, i would play and play with my freinds making funny jokes and seriouse games too.
It makes me sad to feel this is all gone.
I am sad for my friends old and new, i am sad for me. but mostly i am sad for her.
Why was my Little fly taken from me.
will i be her again
can anybody help me?
|22 May 2005||Sad But Not that sad||Well, being 13 is a bit young. Perhaps the kit should actually be opened and reveal that they "should" wait until their 18, 21, or maybe even 30. In other words, give it a few years to reflect. It's certainly not something to be rushed into.
Sure, there are several people that have responded very negatively to this; however, it also reflects their unfamiliarity with the mental status of the person wanting to commit suicide. They should understand that there is certainly an underlying problem. Rather than bark out terrible comments, it would appear that a kind ear and attempt of understanding should be made to understand why. In understanding why, they could have helped that loved one who took their life, or a loved one in the future.
I'm no doctor but I think I have a heart. I've thought about suicide a couple times in my life (since a kid and occasionally still do), but also understand that the basis behind it could probably be fixed with a prozac. But the fact that I acknowledge the problem and realize that I'll get over it, eventually, just leads me to another road.
So, to answer your question, the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13, is to wait til you're 18 to see if things get better, then 21, then 30, and hopefully you'll see that life has it's ups and downs. Down today, up tomorrow.
It's ok to feel sad and want to end it all. Just, please, sleep on it, and give it some time to sink it. Don't be to rash with your decisions. Give it some time...
|17 May 2005||'Scors-b'||"When things are bad, we take comfort in the thought that they could always be worse. And when they are, we find hope in the thought that things are so bad that they have to get better."
I think this has to be the most true thing I have ever read. Take another look. This pretty much sums up why I'm still alive, and maybe it also does for you. No matter how bad things are, there is always hope. Hope is the most important thing in the world. Without it we would all be doomed - hope is what makes you study at school, take a job interview, try out for a team. Hope can make you get up in the morning and I suppose it can also keep you living a life that you really wish you never had.
For me, it feels like just whenever I'm maybe about to find the one thing that would make it all worthwhile, it just fucks up. It fucks up so much that I wish i was more than dead... because right now i can't even explain the pain and frustration. It's maddening, like a beautiful summers day.. but then the thick black clouds come rushing in from all four corners of the sky and fill the chest with deadening pressure. Uncontrollable, like something eating away at you from the inside. I just don't fucking like it. Get it out, before it eats my soul.
I just wanna be me and feel like thats ok. I just wish I could get to know 'me' before I keep trying to get to know 'you'. I just wish god would stop fucking around and just let me out. I wanna be free. So stop the fear and the pain and unlock me so i can get out. Let me out, i wanna get out.
Maybe if there was one thing i have learnt, it is that you have to look after yourself. Because no-ones really there looking out for you.
"No-one except yourself that is,
No-one except you"
So be kind with yourself (but not unforgiving) and remember that there is always one thing that can keep you alive- hope. Pretty shit I guess but then if you can accept this and forget everything else that you are living for life should be a damn sight easier.
If you've read this far and can see any sense in this post, email me.
|15 May 2005||john doe||I wont encourage or discourage any of you-since only you know your lives best. In my life I know I'd leave a very big hole-many people (family/friends) count on me. The trouble is, I have found very little happiness (and a lot of suffering), though I've tried. I wont take up too much space here, but I will say for those who are serious about suicide, research and find a fail-safe method, what you guys described sounds very dangerous. You dont want to end up paralysed or disfigured by trying something that doesnt work. Till you find something that works, love yourself and your body-there's no need to live in agony, while you're looking for a way to die. One method is to breathe compressed helium gas for 5 minutes (read up on it). Its painless and displaces oxygen, so you dont panic when you die. There are drugs that you can overdose on, but I dont know which would be most effective yet. Its not wrong to want to die at any age, but be certain that its a wise decision for you then follow through (or else you'll continue to suffer in misery). I know for instance that I can make the world better, even in a small way, so it would be a loss to humanity to lose good people like me-so its one of the reasons I wont kill myself yet. I plan to try to make changes while I'm around (when I'm in a position to). Otherwise I feel some of my best years have been wasted already (I'm in my 30s now). I've thought about suicide almost every day since I first realized my life really sucks (guess around 12 or so), the misery got 10x worse through university because I took a very difficult program (got pushed into it by my dad-yes I really hate both my parents with a passion). There are suicide clinics in europe and euthanasia groups with smart people on the net. So lots of info out there-check it out. Anyways, hope you all are able to find your peace, in whatever way you choose to find it.|
|12 May 2005||Ayesha||Hi I am Ayesha, originally I am pakistani but my parents were in the UK so now i am here and in my first year of university. since my early childhood, I have considered several countless times to commit suiside but every time I tried commiting I thought about people who really love me though there are only few but when some one really loves you, you can not think of hurting them in anyway so it always stopped me from killing my self. things have never been good for me. as I am the eldest daughter no brother ,I have all these worries of taking responsibilities, I am a full time student but I have two jobs on the top, I work my ass off and have not a single day off when I come home before 9pm , I feel fed up of everything, I do not want all this financial and cultural stress, sometimes I wish I was never born. and some times I feel like I am a strong person and these are minor things because people go through alot more than i would have in my life time. But then everyday it's a same story. same people who pretend to be friends and that they care but they do not, and it really hurts specially when you yourself is a genuine down to earth person, on top of everything when your own boy friend does not trust you and you end up in fight every other day. this all sometimes gets to much for me its not physical but emotionally . So I still several times tried to commit suiside but then I realised its not worth it just see we get this gift of life once only once then why throw it away, why not fight back ... fight back everything. things which happened to me while I was a child as I can not see from one of my eyes (lazy eye) and I used to feel very inferior about it also when I was 3 I broke my leg because some guy pushed me off the slide, I was in the hospital for a whole year and I still have that metal which sticks the fracture together in my leg I cant run it hurts later on and I dont swim cause I feel anxious about my scars from stitches. but then now when I read this web site I realised there is so much more happens in your life which leaves you shattered into pieces like glass, which cant be put together but still they dont loose their shine so instead of thinking about committing suiside , why not Fight Back , work hard because you lot are only 13 and one of you could be a doctor , an artist, an engineer lawyer or much more so be some one and make a difference when you are matured, to the lives of those kids who will be of same age you are today so be independent , do not be some body Be what you are who you are!!!! help those who are in a worse condition than you are, Pray to God , Pray for your peace of mind do voluntary work , help people who are very old just get busy see other peoples pain and forget yours in theirs cause there is much more we have not gone through.....which others have I have so much to say but I have my final exams now so I need to revise you all take care and remember that everyone of you is beautiful inside and precious to me....|
|08 May 2005||Iris Geldo||One of my constant preoccupations is to understand how other people can exist, how there can be souls that aren't mine, consciousnesses that have nothing to do with my own, which, because it's a consciousness, seems to me like the only one.
i accept that the man standing before me, who speaks with words like mine and gesticulates as i do or could do, is in some sense my fellow creature. But so are the figures from the illustrations that fill my imagination, the characters i meet in novels, and the dramatic personae that move on stage through the actors who represent them.
No one, i suppose, genuinely admits the real existence of another person. We may concede that the other person is alive and that she thinks and feels as we do, but there will always be an unnamed element of difference, a materialized inequality. There are figures from the past and living images from books that are more real to us than the incarnate indifferences that talk to us over video-rental counters, or happen to glance at us in the nightclubs, or brush against us in the dead happenstance of the streets. Most people are no more for us than scenery, generally the invisible scenery of a street we know by heart.
i feel more kinship and intimacy with certain characters described in books and certain images i've seen in prints than i feel with many so-called real people, who are of that metaphysical insignificance known as flesh and blood. And "flesh and blood" in fact describes them rather well: they're like chunks of meat displayed in the window of a butchershop, dead things bleeding as if they were alive, shanks and cutlets of distorted Destiny.
i'm not ashamed of feeling this way, as i've discovered that's how everyone feels. What seems to lie behind people's mutual contempt and indifference, such that they can kill each other like assassins who don't really feel they're killing, or like soldiers who don't think about what they're doing, is that no one pays heed to the apparently abtruse fact that other people are also living souls.
On certain days, in certain moments, brought to me by i don't know what breeze and opened to me by the opening of i don't know what door, i suddenly feel that the corner grocer is a thinking entity, that his assistant, who at this moment is bent over a sack of potatoes next to the entrance, is truly a soul capable of suffering.
When i was told yesterday that the employee of the tobacco shop had committed suicide, it seemed like a lie. Poor man, he also existed! We had forgotten this, all of us, all who knew him in the same way as all those who never met him. Tomorrow we'll forget him even better. But he evidently had a soul, for he killed himself. Passion? Anxiety? No doubt....But for me, as for all humanity, there's only the memory of a dumb smile and a shabby sports coat hung unevenly from the shoulders. That's all that remains to me of this man who felt so much that he killed himself for feeling, since what else does one kill oneself for? Once, when i was buying cigarettes from him, it occurred to me that he would go bald early. As it turns out, he didn't have enough time to go bald. That's one of the memories i have of him. What other one can i have, if even this one is not of him but of one of my thoughts?
i suddenly see his corpse, the coffin where they placed him, the so alien grave where they must have lowered him, and it dawns on me that the cashier of the tobacco shop, with crooked coat and all, was in a certain way the whole of humanity.
It was only a flash. What's clear to me now, today, as the human being i am, is that he died. That's all.
No, others don't exist....It's for me that this heavy-winged sunset lingers, its colors hard and lazy. It's for me that the great river is shimmering below the sunset, even if i can't see it flow. It's for me that this square was built overlooking the river, whose waters are now rising. Was the cashier of the tobacco shop buried today in the common grave? Then the sun isn't setting for him today.
But because i think this, against my will, it has also stopped setting for me.
|07 May 2005||kyra||i am so fuked up . im not tring 2 get atenshon but my lif is shit my mum is a contole freek n my dad n mum hav just split up n my mum wont let me c my bruva. i hav just got xpeled from skule n pepul fink im psyco coz i tried 2 kill sum1 n im not sorry , but i cant make myself b . i dont lov ny1 at all n my m8z just make it worse n sumtimes i wanna kill evry1 n i reely wont 2 luv sum1 but i cant . i h8 so much even im scared . i cut my arms n i fink im turnin in2 a vampire, not wiv teef or nyfin but drinking my own blood i bet u all fink vats sik . i h8 myself i hav tried 2 kiil myself 2wice but it didnt work n i lie all da time i fukin h8 life .
|05 May 2005||guy||Pour le suicide du suicide il faut leur dire cela et de le faire quand il seront adultes: "je prends tous les jours le remède que l'incomparable Dickens prescrit contre le suicide. Cela consiste en un verre de vin, un morceau de pain et du fromage, et une pipe de tabac". Vincent van Gogh.|
|01 May 2005||Cody||Tips on Writing Your Suicide Note
Your suicide note will be the last thing people have to remember you by.
Your relatives, friends, police officers, and others, will read it. In some cases, suicide notes, or parts of them, even get to the media. You might think that suicide notes would be the most carefully crafted documents, however in many cases, they are written carelessly and hastily.
The following tips are provided for people who want to leave a real impression.
Note: if you are not actually committing suicide because you want to die but are just looking to get attention, do not bother reading this. Your note will mean nothing once the doctors are done treating the scratches on your wrists or pumping the 2000mg of Advil out of your stomach. There are better ways of getting attention anyway. I suggest you try one of the many services for people who are only crying for help.
Getting an early start is important. If you can, start a few days before your suicide. Make sure you're in a clear state of mind. You do not want to try to write your note while waiting for the pills you took to kick in, or have to rush through it before you bleed to death. Giving yourself enough time to write your note will help eliminate the most common mistakes.
Don't try to say everything.
There are probably a lot of things you have on your mind, and you need to take some time and sort them out. Decide what is most important to say and leave out things that don't matter. Decide now what you want your readers to come away with after reading your note. Eliminate those things that distract from that point.
Handwrite your note if you can.
A handwritten note is a lot more personal. However, if you are worried your letter will not be understood, or you are physically not able to write it by hand don't worry about it. The important thing is that you get your message across.
Write the way you would speak. A good suicide note is personal, not formal. Don't get out the thesaurus and look for the biggest words you can find. Be yourself.
Filling your note with phrases like "Goodbye cruel world" and "no one understands me" will make your note feel less like your thoughts and more like a form letter. Too many cliché's and it can look like you are just going through the motions or that you are leaving a note because you feel that you should, but without having anything to say. If you want to say something but it sounds too cliché, try to re-word it a little.
In general, use first person.
It creates a sense of intimacy and makes it easier for a reader to see things from your point of view, if you want to use a different viewpoint, be sure that you stick to it throughout your whole note.
Don't use your note like a will.
You might want your best friend to get your stereo but your suicide note is not the place to express that. If you want to leave certain things to certain people you should setup a will ahead of time. Just because you write it down does not make it legal, and it can be easily dismissed by the claim that you were not of sound mind when you wrote it.
Taking the time to set up a will will also help keep you from giving away your stuff in the months/weeks/days before the suicide. That's one of the most obvious indications that you are thinking about killing yourself and will likly get you "saved", or at least make the process more difficult.
Your note will be one of the last things you give the world to judge you by. If you include things that others can disprove, it can discount the entire note. Besides, there is not much reason for lying at this point, is there?
Don't reveal your methods.
This is most important when taking poisons and pills. Telling everyone what you took just makes it easier for them to give you the treatments needed to revive you. Alternately, you do not want someone to find the note that details which bridge you're jumping off of before you get that chance to jump. They might be able to stop you. People will find out how you did it once the autopsy reports come in anyway.
Don't say anything you might regret.
There is always a chance that you will be found and "rescued". Suicide notes are not the place to rip into people, give away other's secrets, or confess crimes. The last thing you want is to end up in a hospital bed, facing the people who read something you would never have told them while alive.
Don't try to persuade the reader.
You do not want to spend your time trying to convince the reader that you are right. In most cases nothing you can say will change they way they feel. Your purpose is to express your point of view. It doesn't matter if the reader shares your point of view or not, only that they understand it.
Proofread your note.
Re-read your note at least twice. It's easy to make a simple mistake that distracts from the overall feel of the note. When reading over your note, there are a lot of things to look for. It's better to read it several times, looking for something different each time then to try to remember it all while reading it over once.
Make sure the point you wanted to get across when you started writing is clear. Don't be afraid to made edits, but be sure to read your note over again when you do.
Make your note easy to find
Take some time to consider where to leave your note. If you can't leave it near you, be sure to leave it in an obvious location. Even if you want someone in particular to read your note first, avoid sending it to someone by mail. There are too many things that could go wrong and once you send it, it's gone. Your note could get lost in the mail, or worse, it could reach someone before you can go though with it.
Check your note for flow.
Your note should progress rather then being a loose connection of thoughts and feelings. People reading your note should see that it is going somewhere. If you're having a hard time, start with a sentence or two that sum up the point of the letter, and then end with a summary of the same topic. Every paragraph in between should support that point.
Make sure it's not too long.
There is a reason it's called a suicide note and not a novel. Try to keep it around two or three pages at the most. Avoid the temptation to mention or leave a little note to everyone you know. Not only does that get dull fast but you're certain to leave someone out.
i hope this helps...
|12 Apr 2005||Ms. Kara||Its been a while since i was thirteen, and dear Mouchette you've been 13 for at least the last 6 or more years. Thank you for continuing to offer this resource for crazy, suicidal, and highly emotional people to tell their sad life stories and go on about how valuable life is. For those of us who have a sense of humor, this sight is delightful. Thanks Mouchette for the many years of enjoyment.|
|09 Apr 2005||For Lucy Cortina From Felicia The Great||To Lucy Cortina in regards to the oldest profession in the world.
No, I am not into that stuff. But last night, I had a horrible dream that I was
a skanky hoe. There was these two fine latino dudes in the kitchen who were waiting for me and I stood them up. Since I couldn't come downstairs, they left me an apology note and said that something came up but will meet me later.
And guess who was the pimp?
Well anyways, you told me that I had to find a way to make money (OR ELSE!) and
that we were running broke.
The dream scarred me the rest of the day because I sang "Dim All The Lights"
by Donna Summer and never stopped.
......oh what a horrible thing.......
Write me soon dear.
|28 Mar 2005||ronwelthy||en effet, je pense que le meilleur moyen d'empêcher les jeune de mettre fin a leur jour, c'est de les laisser s'exprimer sur le sujet, qu'ils dédramatisent ce qu'il ressente et ainsi se libère peu a peu de leur tensions..
Ce site est fait pour que le suicide ne soit pas plus un simple objet de fantasme, d'idéalisation, mais qu'il prenne une forme réel au travers des témoignages et des conseil (rares) qui sont donnée.
Je pense que la parole est au contraire plus importante que tout les tabou sur le sujet ...