|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|16 Aug 2002||Tessa||Whahaha, I was just looking for a songtext when I found this page.
I don't know what the best way is.
When I was 11 I tried to slit my wrists with a knife, but I got scared, started thinking how people would react if I wasn't there anymore. (at the time children called me names and stuff for over a year, i got sick of it, and they hurt me really bad).
When I was 12 we moved, things were fine. Then when I was 15 things got bad again. Somebody died, school, me, just things that happened in the world.. I started to slit my wrists, now for real, not with a knife, but with cissors (how do you write that word?) The first one was at April the 13th, 2001. I stopped at a point, because I wanted to give myself a little more time, there was a concert coming up, my first one from the band that I still like. Their music saved me in some kind of way. But in another way it destroyed me more. I didn't quit slitting my wrists, I just always stopped when it started to bleed. Maybe I didn't really want to die. I was depressed then.
Someone told me that I should talk to professionals, but I didn't want to. To me those people are people who pretend to know everything about it, but they just can't if they haven't done it themselves, if they haven't lived trough the same things as me.
Now at this time, my life is great except of the bad things that always happen when I have a good time, so I can hardly allow myself to have a good time, because I am afraid of what might happen.
I haven't slit my wrists for a while anymore, I've got now more than 8 beautiful scars. There are I guess 2 or 3 people who know about this. Not even my parents, they are too busy with their own things.
I don't know if I will ever try again to kill myself, I know I can't promise not to.
Maybe this is a good way to try, maybe not. If you do, you have to cut very deep (and good).
A few years ago I read a poem about cutting wrists (sorry, can't find it). It said that you have to sit in a warm bath and then slit your wrists, because of the warm water the blood will keep flowing.
Actualy I hope that you don't follow the advice, but it is your own decision.
Now when I'm down I write about it (stories and songs) and it helps to talk to someone. (I tell different things to different people, so they never know the real me). Maybe you can try that too.
(I'm 17 now, and still alive. I gave myself another year and see how it then is, so maybe I'm gone next year)
|25 Jul 2002||Velguader||I've tried killing myself as well. First was the wrist slitting (doesn't work) then gas (doesn't work) and then I tried hanging (got busted). Right now... my life still sucks and i would prefer death. But wouldn't you know it. A month at a child psychiatric centre and I've lost my nerve. I keep a bottle of pills hidden in case I ever face a great tragedy and I regain my nerve. I'm 16 now. I bumped into this site when I was 14. I was looking for a painless method of suicide. Anyways, I've sort of changed my life. Instead of following the shitty depressing path of going to a hard school with people that don't like me, I've just stopped altogether. I live in my room and read comics and play video games. I guess I sort of have commited suicide. All you might need to do is find out what's bugging you and get away from it. I got tired of being in a fucking sausage factory of a life. I hate shallow petty assholes that were my "friends" just so they could feel better about themselves. Maybe the answer isn't suicide. Maybe it's eliminating the OTHER part of the problem. You have just as much a right to live as everyone else. Do you take the nitrogen or the gycerine away?|
|15 Jul 2002||sad and suicidal||This morning I woke up with a bad feeling in my head, once again I'd woken up to depression, on and off for the last year I have turned myself into a pin cushion.
I'm 15 too right, my body is scarred and many a time I have tried to kill myself, but for some reason I can't, it never works, I took an overdose and had my stomach pumped, I've repeatedly slit my wrists but I've always had people helping my. What I dont understand is, if I wanna die, why cant I? Why do I always have people trying to stop me? I know they love me but if they love me enough they would respect my idea to do it, I'm slightly worse this month, it's coming up to the anniversary of a close friend's death who commited suicide almost a year ago.
I dont know why I'm writing this, it's not worth it.
|13 Jul 2002||Annette||well yea im here to complain again. i tried sooo hard to think of how i should stay alive and it just doesn't work. if anyone of u had a friend like i do then you'd wanna do it also. and a life tha i do trust me you'd be tempted veeerry easily to end it. and i've even tried EVERY possible way. i lost track of how many times of attempted. well i guess tomrrow is prob just gonna be another attempt but maybe 57 pills would work good. bye bye|
|06 Jul 2002||Gary-17yr||k...
I'm about to do this right, and-do it now.
I'm here in arken-red-neck-vill.... I can't take it, I figured I'd do some reading about suicide before all of this, and I found this site, and so I just wanted to give my last words and a bit of a story about this.
My name is Gary Linton, I was born and lived for 9 years in a town in Missouri, and then to where I am now. My parents never listened to me, especially when my uncle forced me to give him oral sex when I was 7. I was beaten by my father for "degrading a respectable man" FUCK HIM!! My parents neglected me when I was a child, never giving the time for me, all they cared about was... was their stupid fucking jobs and money for a real house.... Hitting me when they had a problem with something not even related to me.
I just hate life in general and I have read what a lot of you have said.. You're right. Fuck those who don't get how shitty life can be, fuck those snobs down the street with the $100 shirt, hat, shoes and pants that are all pre-worn. Fuck my uncle who got away with something no one even believes me for. I don't fucking give a shit!.... heh, Dad finally left the gunrack unlocked....
You'll reading this, maybe even mail me and say "funny message"... well, I won't be here to say "thanks" back. I'm hitting enter, and then blowing my brains out, I suggest if you're under 13 then you can do it too.
count to 10 starting now... Bye
|05 Jul 2002||Hopeless, Useless and High||I'm 15 years old, from the USA and I think life sux! No one understands me, my parents think I'm crazy and that I say I don't wanna live just to get attention. Fuck attention! I just want out. I've seen too much, done too many drugs and know too much. I've got too many problems to keep on living. I can't find a good bf, I spent all my money on concert tix and weed so now my phone is about to get turned off and I owe money on all my credit card bills. I grew up watching my parents and ppl I didn't know doing drugs and committing countless crimes, two of my parent's friends committed suicide and although my parents always talk about how they took the easy way out, I think it took courage and I admire them for going through with it. If only I could get the courage to do it. But I figure I should use the time I have left to fuck around, skip school, not listen to authority figures and just drink and do as many drugs as possible, if i cant find a way to kill myself I'm sure that if I keep these habbits for a while I'll die soon anyway (and have fun in the process)
Peace Out fellow suicidal ppl
|18 Jun 2002||Nurse Betty||Ahhh Mouchette, what do you think? And 13, really? The French must be so advanced from us American Barbarians! I am tired of seeing so many people botch the job of trying to kill themselves. So tired. The new bride, who married on Friday and shot herself in the temple on Saturday...body alive and donored out 5 days later.... The 60 yr old after drinking Whiskey and taking Valium who missed his brain but blew out an eye and will have permanent sinus problems...the many, many vegetables who linger in rest homes with brain injuries from pills that only cause oxygen depletion to their brains, but not death. Was I suppose to answer your website without my name or email? What people choose to do with their life is not my problem. If one were to read your site, suicide would be delayed quite a long time don't you think, Mouchette? One can not encourage something like suicide. Each decides for theirself. Have I answered your email to your satisfaction? Good Luck with your Kit. Do you think Mattel will Market it?|
|17 Jun 2002||phsyco#777||i was thirteen the first time i tried to commit suicide and clearly it didn't work. i stole my mother's vp commodore and went to my dealers house and scored $100 worth of pot, i smoked that down to the last crumb, i drove around for around 24 hours and then i decided to finally do it while i had the chance.... so at 210 kmph i slammed myself (and the car) into a cement wall. the wall collapsed and i was stuck in the car ALIVE. i fell into a coma for three weeks, i was then assesed by a psych doc and i was locked up for three years of my life. now during those three years i stole the hospital car and slamned the fucker into a steel pole at high speed (fuck those air bags). i slit my wrists, hit an artery and passed out in the shower from blood loss. i hung myself from the tree in the court yard and passed out. i swallowed a razor blade in the hope that i would cut all my guts open and die of internal blood loss, it just came out in my shit! i tongued all my meds i collected around 200 sedatives at 10 mg each and all that happened was ...i got a stomach pump (charcoal). they put a tube down your nose and pump you full of this black shit. oh and i'll tell you some thing else .. if you want to escape the whole hospitalisation thing then all you have to do is tell them that you are feeling fine now that you now appreciate your life and that you want to live life to the fullest or some bullshit like that . but NEVER under any circumstances do you tell them that you want to die, they'll lock you away, and believe me once your in there it's so fucking hard to get out. it makes your desire for death become a need|
|07 Jun 2002||Ruler Asiatic||The best way to kill yourself is not to. Everything happens for a reason and that reason is for over all good. You may not see it now because depression and pain are such blinding emotions that blur the underlined purpose. There is not one person on Earth who has not felt the pain and suffering you have felt, because that is part of being a human being. The people who have suffered the most pain in their lives and the most rejection end up becoming the most successful, Why? Because after all they suffered, and all their hardships, it made them stronger and immune to pain and enabled them to set out to do what they had to without fear of failure. My father was jealous of me and hated me and tried to say I was dumb, and said I wouldn't amount to anything and abused me. And I believed him. I did not want to live, this example probably pales in comparison to what some of you are going thru, but I understand your desire for suicide. This year I just graduated from Florida Southern College the top in my class and made my father look like an ass because he said I couldn't do it. And when you really think about it, when you commit suicide, YOU are not really killing yourself, you're allowing THE PROBLEM or the PERSON who is driving you to have these thoughts to do THEIR WORK. Don't eliminate yourself, eliminate the problem!!!|
|03 Jun 2002||Lisa||Pills, I committed suicide last February '02. The best way to do it is to drink as much as you can, Midol, Cough Syrup, prescription medicine, tyenol, advil... glip down with some alcohol, it works. See, what it does is that it makes your heart beat super fast & you feel like your heart is gonna explode. People think pills are for whuss, yeah right. If you unfortunately survive... this is what happens, they stick a tube up your- (girls) & 1 up your nose & pumpin' pumpin' pumpin'. You'll have the shits for days, some say a month, & it's blue/black (it's called "charcoal"). They take you to the mental clinic, I was in there for 1 week, but for those who are under 18, I dunno where you go. Other then throw yourself into a meat grinder or put a bomb on yourself... make sure when you do it, YOU DIE. Cuz if you don't, if they take you to the hospital "unfortunately" on the nick of time & you survive, I'm telling ya, it's hell & more, worse than the reason why you attempted suicide in the 1st place.|
|14 May 2002||Hang In||Hey..... don't kill yourself. seriously. i've been in hospitals and all. I'm 17. my arms are cut alllllll over. it's shitty, but once u get the rigt kind of help your life can turn around. No joke. Come on, just try to hang in there. Your filling out theese shitty forms from the sicko who made up this gay website as a cry for help. none of u truly wanna die. Trust me. i know. i've attempted many times. it's really not worth it. Think of one thing to keep u going. I know, i used to have nothing at times, but then something would keep me going. Try to do something in ur spare time like a hobby. Later.|
|08 May 2002||someone powerful in 10 years||I am 19 and I can't remember I felt a prolonged period of happiness. I am not like most on here in any sense, I have never had a drink, never done drugs, waiting until marriage and mind you this is all by choice, but my life could be very different morally right now if not for a few unfortunate things. My father's death a couple of years ago caused me to become more moral, not religious, but not allow anyone to know me at all. I don't think I have had an honest conversation with someone since that event occured. I am a master of deception, I can put on a facade of nothingness, blocking out the pain and leaving the mystery about me. I have been blessed with a lot; I have a future, and everything most could want. BUT I have an emptiness within me. I AM CONVINCED THERE ARE A FEW MARKED HUMAN BEINGS THAT HAPPINESS WAS NOT MADE FOR THEM TO REALIZE. I am one of those people that will be eternally void of love and contentment, but I have accepted it. The pressure put on me for grades, ect.. have caused me to not cause anymore pain to my family. I do have a drive, but that is out of necessity to better others, not myself. There is no hope for me, although my life will be filled with fame and power on the highest of political positions one day, I will always be the one person no one can know or ever will know.|
|29 Apr 2002||amandahlynn||I tried to kill myself last year, I took between 20-30 Paxil, painkillers, sleeping pills for 6 days straight. I didn't sleep, I didn't eat, I shook violently, I couldn't write, I couldn't read, and I wound up in the emergency room and institutionalized. From someone who knows, you don't want to wind up like that. It's not worth downing a 16 ounce cup of CHARCOAL to coat your stomach to keep the drugs from entering your bloodstream. It's not worth seeing your mother and your best friend with their eyes bloodshot from crying, sitting across from you in a hospital room. It's not worth the monitored phone calls, the nurse that stays with you 24/7, and it's so not worth the $11,000 hospital stay bill. Because after you die, people around you miss you, and you're not even around to tell. My friend committed suicide, and she never thought her parents or friends cared until after she was gone - then she should have seen how many came to her funeral, how many of her friends gave eulogies, and how many people cried when her coffin was being put in the ground. But she wasn't around to see any of that - because she thought if she ended her life, then HER pain would stop. HER pain just lived on in other people. She hung herself, and you know how painful it is to see your friend hanging from an eletrical cord from the basement ceiling, with blood streaming down her stomach from where she stabbed herself? Do you know how painful it was for my parents to get a phone call in the middle of the night saying their daughter was in critical condition because of an overdose? Don't put others in a position like that. I can understand suicide, I really can, but I just want suicidal youths to know there are other ways even though it doesn't feel like it. I started my life over again. I've had lots of slip-ups but now I'm doing better than I ever was. I still cut - still overdose - but I'm trying to stay away from positions where I put myself out to be hurt.|
|26 Apr 2002||demonic angel||(responding to "in search of an answer")
hey i have an idea: run away from your problems, u say you have an abusive brother, run away to covenant house or some other place, it's better than killing yourself, you don't really have that many reasons to anyways, ok? And so your mom's a bitch and she wants you to be the best... HELLO!!! THAT MEANS SHE CARES ABOUT YOU!!! AT LEAST YOUR MOM DOESN'T MAKE FUN OF YOU AND SAY THAT YOU'RE THE CAUSE OF HER PROBLEMS!!! (that i'm not sure of, though) my mom nearly died of alcohol poisoning and she blames me for it! She beats the crap out of me sister who is gonna turn 12 soon while my brother (6) is screaming bloody murder at her! oh and at least you have a dad! he may be in a wheel chair but you have one! my father walked out on me and my mother, she was so mad at ME for that, that she left me with a schizophrenic grandfather! And you know what he did when he found out that i wanted to kill myself? Instead of giving me help the motherfucker yelled at me! So you think you have problems? Have you ever had to live off the street? Eat out of fuckin garbage cans? When i ran away form home i went 1 week withought food! At the end a half eaten wendies hamburger looked good enough to eat! One week all i had was an open bag of peanuts i found behind a dumpster! and i didn't kill myself, i just went with it even when i got cought stealing some food at a mall and i got arrested i didn't kill myself. Thing will get better for you and if your brother bugs ya again let me know i got fucking connections around here........ if you live in Toronto i can help you.... and if not just run away, or get a fuckin swat team after him! You can charge the bastard for assault! Tell everyone you know and you're not a piece of shit! Think better of yourself and things will get better, they sort of for me....
|19 Apr 2002||oh,.,,||today is my birthday, im 19 now,., i love this question and these answers,.,,, like small words get filled up when all these people explore them,.,,, i dont know why i look at this site all the time,.,, i cant say i like anyone's answer in particular,., i dont want to be alive a lot but i cant say i relate to what anyone here has had to say,.,,. i look around on the internet a lot when im sad because there's so much to see and plus i feel pretty alone and i try to find at least one other person that could think like me,.,, it hasn't worked yet but i think the internet is the wrong place to look,.,, anyway,., i just felt like celebrating my birthday here instead of anywhere else,.,, becoming part of all this other unfulfilled muck that can only find its strength and meaning from people's constant amendments to the way this website looks,.,., i feel like i should answer the question simply because it's there,,.,, but im very good at making music and i constantly look forward to a day when im famous and i can set up a video camera and cut my wrists pretty bad but not enough to kill my tendons and tape me playing piano and see how long i can stay conscious,.,, i think that right now that is the most beautiful thing i can give to this world,.,, i would play my prettiest song and anyone could watch me dying spitting out the best my mind can do at trying to react to life,.,,,., i spend hours and hours a day making up songs on a piano and a lot of the time im thinking of how perfect it would all be if my wrists were pushing out my blood and i knew i had to do the best i could because those would be the last notes i would play,.,, and then to have it on tape to show other people like me so they can cry like life really is this bad,.,|
|09 Apr 2002||Karlynn||hi i'm 14 and i attempted suicide around 10 times, once i slit my wrist damit it hurts that's not the best way, the other time i took a tylenol because the docter said that i have a 50/50 chance of dying. All that happened was i got vilently ill. other times were pretty much the same.|
|26 Mar 2002||Richard Manfre||Whatever you do don't try using bleach. It only eats away at the inner lining of your esophagus and if it even gets down your throat into your stomach it only eats away at the lining of that too. Bleach is not something that is able to be kept down by your body. I'm not sure why. But it just doesn't. I've tried it before. I drank almost a full cup of it. All that happened was I vomited it up and ruined my mother's carpet and my clothes. I tried this when I was 17. I am now 19. I'm thinking of trying something else again though....|
|20 Mar 2002||It Really Doesn't Matter...||My confession: I'm 23. I have lived my whole life doing right - never did drugs, slept around, helped my single mom out by taking a job and always working to help her and my younger siblings. My point is I discovered it really does not matter in the end what kind of sacrifices you made. Life does not reward you for being decent or a good kid, student or person. No one will come up to you and tell you that you did a good job resisting peer pressure. I have discovered in my 23 years that the bad guys or the people who live it up turn out just as fine as the ones who struggled for the basic. My point: it really doesn't matter. Sluts wear white on their wedding day, adulters funk around all week then go to church on Sunday, and it's the good guy that will get fucked in life. Why bother to live in a world where you did everything right by everyone's standards, only to discover that it really doesn't matter... if God was so concerned about good and evil God would do something about it. I for one have decided to end this bullshit life for myself.|
|19 Mar 2002||Riley||I used to love myself and my life. I've always been someone who other people could talk to. I was good at listening. Then one day a friend of mine came to me for help. He was thinking about killing himself and wanted someone to be there for him for a change. I listened for a long time until he was finished talking. Then I talked. I told him about all the reasons he had to live. I told him that there was people who actually cared about him and that it was all in his head. After that we would talk a little everyday. He was slowly getting better. A while after that I started actually thinking about what I was telling him. I slowly began to realize what I load of shit it was. I began to relate to everything he was telling me, then I started realizing that there really wasn't much there for me and what there was, was just too painful. I realized that before I was living a complete lie. I am ugly. I am stupid. I have no future. Why should I keep living in the pain of knowing that everyday? I dont want to go back to living that lie. The only reason I'm stil here is cuz i want to keep my friend from killing himself. I know that sounds odd but I do care about him much more than I do myself. I want to be free of this. All of it. The pain, the want, the guilt of knowing I will never be good enough. I want out. After all, a little bit of pain is worth complete freedom, isn't it?|
|18 Mar 2002||Ben||my biggest problem is that my brain constantly works. i wish you could stop your brain from working, at least in certain areas. im addicted to pills an alcohol, oh yea that helps i guess. but i find myself thinking more in depth on how my life sucks, how my hate is growing and my love is rapidly leaving me. i dont want to die without pain. i want to die slowly and painfully so i can cry again. man im not even sure when is the last time i truly cried. crying use to feel so good, but i guess that's when i truly felt anything. well i dont go around saying go ahead kill yourself, but if you feel like its the only way, its up to you. i dont want to better myself any longer i no longer wish to wake up everyday. i just want it to stop for me. ive never been selfish in my life... and if this is selfish then its been 21 years of unselfishness, its about time i had my due.|