|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|23 Jun 2004||lace||Iv been thinking about suicide for so long, but i never go through with it. Im so unhappy in my life, im at college but i cant seem to get on with the work and even if i try so hard i always fail my exams. My mum always shouts at me, tells me im useless,and that im never at home, which is crap, i spend most of my time sat on the internet trying to find someone to talk to. Its not that i dont have friends, its quite the opposite, but non of them really understand how i feel, and mostly just tell me to get over it. My bf is unhappy because he thinks me being like this is somehow his fault. I cant stand to see him like it, and its tearing us apart. I drink alot, i sit on my own watching the television and just drink for hours. I dont want to die, its something that scares me more than anything, but i cant carry on living like this. I feel like living is making everyone else miserable, my mum cries all the time, and blames her own unhappyness on me. It really gets me down and i wish there was something i could do to stop me causing all this pain. Is suicide my only way out?|
|23 Jun 2004||dee||I'm not 13, but I have been dealing with so many problems that I am ready to give up with life. What is so great about it anyways, i'm suffering right now. It's like when your grandma is so old and sick and she is suffereing, everyone knows in their minds that it is better for her to go so that she no longer suffers. That is how I feel. I feel like grandma. I am only 21, but i feel like I am 97. I do have the strength of a 21 year old, but my stress level and mind is like that 97 year old which wears down my strength to try. For the past 9 years I have been a FUCK up. I mean I have made so many wrong decisions that I just keep getting in trouble or pushed back with life. I hate it. I decided that after I get that call from my insurance company regardless of the result. I am going to do what I planned. I am ready. I am tired everyone telling me that I never learn. I tried to look at the good sides by reading the cards my girls and sister gave me for my graduation. It helps but not enough. I know they see potiential in me. But I don't. All I see is a fuck up. Someone who just makes the wrong decisions. So in 3 days I will finally be relieved from all the stress and suffering.|
|19 Jun 2004||Krysti K||I am not under 13. I am 3x's that age. I grew up in group homes when my mother died and never thought i would make it to 35. Now thats just around the corner and I have made up my mind that waiting all this time is fruitless. I'm going to do it in the next few days because life is bleak. Im a loser with no career, no job, no light at the end of the tunnel, one family member that is selfish, (guess you could say that about me too) and a fiance who is clueless no matter how much I tell him I am hurting and need him. Its too late for me....hope not for you. Oh and my shrink of 3 years gave me her cell phone number which I will not use cuz i dont want anyone to know and find me in time. I'm relieved it will all be over soon.|
|17 Jun 2004||heather||hi, i am 15 and i have been sucidal for 3 years now. i done every drug you can think of, and i m a cutter. i feel as if this world that i live in is not reality anymore. i have no feeling and no emotin for anything or anyone. i was with a guy for 26 months. even no he was 4 years older than me we were perfect together. about a month ago he told me that he had slept with my best friend. that broke my heart and i was already suicidal. when i had found this out i sat down to think and the best thought that came to my mine was death. i was already really unhappy and the fact that i had just lost my boyfriend and my bestfriend in day just set it off.i sat down and i wrote letters to all my close friends and my parents. 3 days later i planned to do it. i cleaned everything i put all of my clothes in boxes and was ready for death. my ex-boyfriend mark had noticed that i was acting alittle strange and ask me what was goin on with me and i told him that was not happy and that i wouldnt have to worry about it in a few days. and he told me that she wanted to hang out. so the night i was goin to do it i went to his house and we talked for like 6 hours. i went home that night and i was ok withit still and i was ready to die. so i sat down and i slit my wrist and took a whole bunch of pills. for some reason mark came back over came back over and found me half dead. he took me to the hospital. 4 days later i was releast for the hospital and i got home and i wanted to die more then anything. i felt as if i was so much of a disappointment to everyone that i should not live adn i should show my face anywhere again. my ex boyfriend mark came over that day and he has been here ever since its going on 26 day and he hasnt left once with out me. i i dont no what i would do it i had the chance to be alone.|
|13 Jun 2004||ryan-beth||the first time i can clearly remember wanting to die i was 7. i saw something on tv and the person said that if you wanted something bad enough u could will it to happen. i immediately went to my room, layed in bed and tried to will myself to die. i have tried other things throughout the years also.i tried slitting my wrists. that landed me 3 months in the psych ward. pills i tried several times and just got sick for days. tried to hand myself and the poll in the closet broke. i am now 24. the last time i tried i was 17. i spent 10 years trying to end my life. only the last time there was something i didnt know...i was pregnant.i had tried to slit my wrists again. now i have 3 kids. i do still have times where i think of suicide. think everyone would be better off without me. then i realise how many people would be lost with out me. especially those 3 kids. they are worth living for, they are my life. i had a horible life. that is now ok. you never know what is comming in your future. so choose wisely. death may solve your problems but only creates more for others.|
|10 Jun 2004||ronny-ron||im not even under thirteen. (girl called "Beccy" email me if u want. i cant get urs 2 work sorry) anyway im seventeen. i feel this shit all around me, pressing in on me everyday. There's no relief, just the same thing everyday. There's no change, no love for me. All i have is my room and greyness surrounding me. This isn't natural. No one should feel like this. i pretend that i'm happy and no one knows i'm not. perhaps they dont care. i have been living at home since i was fifteen, doing home school. Surely they must realise somethign is worng. Why the hell do i hide in my room every day? i cant even talk to my friends anymore. To be honest i dont know why im writing this. i guess it's good to get it off ur chest.
How did it start? When i was thirteen and began smoking pot. When ur young that shit fucks wiht ur mind. it is the worst drug in the world. it has damaged me, but in such a way that no one notices except me. Now i can even defend myself. if someone calls me a name i just look away. If someone tells me to fuck off i just go. I become really hurt to, but i cant say anything. If i meet someone face to face that i don't know like the back of my hand i become terrified. My mind freezes i'm that scared. I'm also failing at my school work. i dont care about it that much, ubt my family all think i am normal and smart, when i'm really brain dead and fucked-up. I want to be an author, but everyone around me tells me that's impossible. No one makes enough money to survive from what they right! Holy fuck, as i want to hear that! i just want to curl up into a ball and die. i feel tears welling up in my eyes becuase i realise how fucked i am and how it's never going to be better. I mean, we all know it! everyone here knows that this shit just presses around you worse every day. You say go on antidepressents? You have no idea how much shit my family would give me if i did that! They would tease me every moment fo the day. My mum would check the amount of pills every hour in case i took one extra. They woudl ask 'if i'd taken my happy pills yet?'
fuck that. that would make my life ten times worse. all i want to do is write, but even that is forbidden to me.
|07 Jun 2004||sucidalmonkey||" get over it" you have no fuckin clue so go screw your self!!!!
I am 16 and i am an adopted kid of this old lady who says she cares but puts me to work like a slave. She even calls me that sometimes her "slave" so don't tell us shit ok? "get over it", were you too afraid to give your email address ?????????????????
|27 May 2004||Kat||Well shit where do i start ???... I cannot remember a time where there was happiness in my life. Since I can remember I have some kind of abuse in my life. I remember when I was three (yes three) my father making my mother stay up with me while he made me sit on the potty because I wet the bed. My mother fell asleep and I remember him beating her...
My mother never wanted a daughter, she only wanted sons. Well I have 4 brothers I am the only girl. She tryed to kill me as a child and was hospitalized two times. My mother ended up putting me and my two brothers in Foster homes where I lived for 7 years, till the age of 13. My father was the one who took us out of foster care system. It took him 5 years to find out where we were.
Well you think it would get better for me but it turned into a living hell, being beaten , raped, told you are ugly stupid, being told no one will ever want you, I thought so many times through out the years about kiling myself, I tried a few times, taking pills, but always woke up (damn!). I left home for a little while and ended up getting pregnant , my father threatened the guy and i ended up moving back with him (my father) where i lived with my daughter until i was 21. The day he treatened to hurt her, I left my car and my things and moved to cali. Well, things over the years never seemed to get better , more abuse and put down more, I am told I am stupid, no good, fat , no one will ever love me or want me. My current b/f has abused me so much i feel worthless, broken noses to busting my ear open, to my head broke open, smashing everything in my home, I ask him to go but he stays, he does not work or help me, I am supporting 4 people on an 8 dollar an hour income, i am to the point were I can not take it anymore. I hate my life and everything. I look at my children and feel so heart broken that they live in poverty, without food or money, bills piled up, because this asshole will not go, the police came here and told him to leave but he waited two hours and came back , said " honey i'm home " never left. I live in my house like a prisoner, no family or friends, no one to help me, my children would be better without m , they can live with their father, (well my son's father) he has money, a nice house, he can take care of them.
I am sorry for not being the person people want me to be, I am honest caring, never been in trouble with the law, i work 4 plus hours a week and take care of everything , but it seems it is not good enough ,
i am tired of trying ,
Thank you for letting me write here ,
peace out ,
I am in a living hell what more is there?
|26 May 2004||I_want_a_shoulder_to_cry_on||Everyday I look at myself and laugh. I look in the mirror and want to smash it up because the reflection tears up my insides. I look at my body line at the over hanging bits of skin here and there. I cry at those. I seem to be close enough to tears everynight now. From the days when I would come home and pose in the mirror now I look with hatred. Around a month ago I found out that my life was over. in my head this is. So now everyday without fail I cut some place on my body to remind myself and to let a little bit of the dead me out. When I bleed I smile as I am satisfied and happier with the outcome. My wrists have become my main target area over the past few days, I get a real thrill when I see a mark on them because I know I got that nearer giving up to be happy. I look for a shoulder to cry my painfree tears away but no one comes to my rescue. As I look around the people seem to get further and further away. When I die you will get back into view and I will remember you all - because I want to be the person I was yesterday. the person I was when I was happy. So cut your wrists if you want to die. that's were my happiness begins.|
|21 May 2004||Brittney||Well I'm only 14.. but let me tell you suicide isn't that easy. I mean I'm going through so much right now I just want to die!!! And your prolly thinking OmG ur not only hurting urself but ur loved ones... what if i have no loved ones.. or nobody to care.. exactly. I just I need a way to kill myself. I tried pills i took 40 then i went to sleep it doesn't work i just woke up and was really sick and had to go to the hospital... I ended up injuring my liver tho.|
|18 May 2004||cody||hey im really sorry about the letter i wrote on november 9th 2003 i said all of that shit about killing my self but now iv figured out that it wasnt everyone around me that was making me like that i didnt really think about it but now i know that it is just fuckin retarded to kill your self so please dont do it know matter who you are there is always someone who loves you and would hate to see you die so just think about it not just once or twice think of all the good things in your life try skateboarding thats what i did and it stopped me from trying to kill my self cause i actually was having fun and i had no time to think of all the bad memories cause i was making good memories|
|26 Apr 2004||suicidal terrorist||im older than 13, but am so familar with depression and worhtlessness that its all i can feel. ive been a junkie. i am an alcoholic. i have my own family, and thats the only thing that keeps me here. i couldnt imagine abandoning my son on this earth. it actually depresses me dearly that i was thoughtless enough to bring him into this evil world. im getting older, fatter, balder, meaner, and more despondent. i pray for the apocalypse. email me if you you want to help it transpire.|
|17 Apr 2004||kat||all my pain, ive blamed on life. but after years of the same shit maybe the problem doesnt lie within life and what is around me but rather within me. i am the problem. the only person to blame for all my pain is ultimately me. so do i kill myself beacuse i dont know how to handle life or do i live and hate myself every waking moment, trying not to escape to the pleasures of my razor? i am nothing. i dont matter. but there are people in my life who dont want me to die for their own selfish reasons, they dont want to take responsibilty and they dont want to feel pain. so the reason for my life is to spare everyone else from guilt? when i cried out for help no one came and even now nobody answers, eventually i will have to give up and then they will feel bad and nod their head and go poor girl she was so messed up. when the entire time they could have helped me, couldve given me a shoulder to lean on. the point is in the game of life i LOSE. i give up. you win.|
|16 Apr 2004||i need a hug||i dont think i want to commit suicide... i just dont like myself to be happy... theres no reason for me to be like this... im naturally smart have some good friends im not ugly... i did have a lot of close people die and i cry about them a lot but still i dont see why i should die... but the feelings always here... ive cut myself when the pain was really bad which i seem to do all this in the shower... like just a girl i guess something about being in the water just makes it easier and more secret it seems... broken razor blades work well theyre really sharp... also burning helps it seems... also i think im kinda schizophrenic... when im alone my mind tells me there are people around me trying to get me and kill me... its some of the worst fear ive ever felt in my life... almost like knowing you are going to die right in that instant and having no control over it at all... i dont think i will kill myself but i dont feel like lifes worth living... i dont understand why im here and like why am i me and not someone else... and why do i matter if as soon as i die ill be forgotten... if not as soon as then eventually... my parents dont know anything about me... just today has my mom started to notice something was wrong but then she just asked if someone was being mean to me at school... they just dont get it... i see plenty of reason to live and i think thats the only thing that changes my mind when i get so far gone... but watching the blood drip down my leg just makes me want to do it more... its like one cut isnt enough... like i shouldnt be feeling the way i do and i should be punished for it... i wish i had medication or something but i cant tell anyone... they wouldnt believe me... ask for a psychiatrist? i dont think that would work either... i think it would hurt my parents... like i was not right or something... and i try to make myself be happy but it just makes me feel worse... like itll work for a while but then ill need to make myself sad again... i have made myself throw up before but i didnt enjoy it that much... the only thing that makes me happy is being with someone who i love and loves me back or being with someone whos just cool haha... and i like getting away from everything but sitting on my own and thinking sucks cause then i just think about all thats gone wrong and i cant help it... i feel crazy... i just need someone to talk to who understands... and a hug...|
|13 Apr 2004||The Little Kiss||Lost dude, why don't you try anti depressants?? They have worked miracles for millions, including me. You say you want to know the meaning of life, and you want to die at the same time. That't doesn't make sense. you don't really want to die. Why don't you want to see a therapist? What do you have to lose? Your life?? You're thinking of killing yourself for God's Sake!!! Just go to a friggin therapist and try some anti depressants. It's really not that bad.
I don't believe there is anything wrong with suicide. I plan on killing myself, but not until I can no longer take care of myself. There comes a point when life just becomes a chore that isn't fun anymore..... but like I said, it doesn't get like that until you're old and can't function without 24 hour care. That's when I think it's time for me to go.... or if I'm in some horrible accident and I get brain damage I've asked people to kill me. When I am really old, I plan on first taking drugs to completely numb my body, then crushing some LSD, and slipping in to a freezing cold bath, letting my life slowly fade away while I have incredible LSD visions.
The easiest way to kill yourself is just jump off something high and land on your head. You don't even need to jump off something very high as long as you land on head. Hell, even jumping off your own 15 foot roof could do it. I STRONGLY disagree with the dude who said that overdoese is the best way. WRONG! Overdose is the WORST way because it fails the most often. And people almost always take the WRONG drugs. By wrong I mean either drugs that will not kill them, or drugs that cause extremely painful deaths.
But, even though jumping and landing on your head is the easiest, most accessible, most painless, and instant way to die..... you should give life more of a chance. Try anti depresssants!!!! They really can completely change your entire world. Suddenly those suicidal thoughts you are plauged with just aren't there anymore and you won't believe the new world you live in.
|12 Apr 2004||lost||I think about killing myself everyday, no joke. No, it's not the best thought in the world, but it races through my mind every day. I tried killing myself by taking a bottle of pills, but I only through them up. I tried suffocating myself, but i chickened out at the last minute. I ask why I am here. I want to know the point of life. I don't know what to do. Every time I am about to kill myself, I chicken out. I cut myself a lot and I don't want to go to any therapist. I just want to die. Please help me.|
|10 Apr 2004||Joyce||Ok, there is no good sure way to kill yourself. Had friends who took pills and ended up mental cause it was caught in time to leave them a veg. Then a gun, blew half his brain out, left a veg and worse off. Then rat poison, left them with stomach problems - someone always seems to find you in time it seems, the car turned on with the tailpipe steaming - no the neighbor is too nosey. It won't work if God has a plan for your life - if he plans to use you as a garbage can or something like he does me. There is no abuse or pain that I have not suffered from my fellow man. I am bankrupt, divorced, remarried, abused, laughed at, sick, handicapped, you name it. I don't think you are weak if you think about it, I think you are a good person no one cares about. I am very pretty and talented and have 5 kids, but my husband is abusive and everyone around me is selfish and uppity. They all mock me out and tell me how to run my life. It's lonely. I just sit most days, go to work where I don't get paid in the greenhouse cause it is a pipe dream of my husband that it'll pay off someday. I come home, work more, and it ends with sleep. I wait I work, I sleep, I pray God will just take me that is how you commit suicide for REAL - give up and let God use your life for whatever he decides, which my purpose is a toilet for other people to crap on.|
|04 Apr 2004||bt||I'm not 13. Actually, I'm just over 15, a male, and my life is pretty bad (at least I think so). I was diagnosed with anorexia about 6 months ago, and I've been recovering *extremely* well. I was the one who initiated help, and I really worked hard to get better. But, a few months ago, a was diagnosed with depression. I'm on my third type of anti-depressants, and on a pretty high dosage. Soon after that, I started cutting.
The cutting was pretty bad, but I've been challenging myself to see if I can stop, and I've been luckily able to. My legs are pretty scarred up, but there's not much I can do.
With me, I find it hard to go on because I don't see the point in living. I have great relationships with girlfriend, parents, family, friends, etc. But, even with that, I cannot see the point in living. I keep asking myself what the point of life is, and I don't believe in religion. I'm an unofficial anarchist, and I think that religion is stupid -- but that is *solely* my opinion.
I'm also asking myself and seeking answers to questions about the universe, who humanity/galaxy was created, who I am in this world, etc.
I've had suicidal thoughts the last few weeks. Not very bad, but a few times I have started planning. But, after I informed my psychologist that I had these thoughts, we made a promise that I have to call her if I am thinking of doing anything.... which I will live up to.
But, anyway, other than that I just felt like adding my story. Thankfully, I have a *fucking* wicked psychologist, who is really helpful. This might be just because I was lucky, but if you are thinking about suicide, get a psychologist -- and one that you like. I know, sometimes it's not possible, but she is who has really saved me.
Anyway, if there is anyone out there who just wants to relate to someone else about what they're going through, I'm here. I'm going through a tough time too, so talking to other people is always good. Thanks.
|28 Mar 2004||A Confused Girl||I am 14 now and I live in California... I never really thought my home life was that bad so I never realy considered killing myself, but ever since 8th grade started I have been getting into a lot trouble... drugs... grades... alcohol... and friends.. I was grounded almost every other day and it sucked. I am one of those people that always thinks ahead and one day it just came to me, while i was crying over my boyfriend dumping me that i had so much more shit coming in my life that I wasn't ready for. I have only been suffering from depression for around a year but it's getting worse, i've already cut my self, but just once to see what would happen. I often get nightmares about death and suicide and it freaks me out... i never know what the dreams mean. Lately I have been thinking more and more about suicide... the more I thought about it I realised that I never could think of anything I wanted to live for... actually I considered doing it tonight and that is why I am telling all you strangers... I guess you could call this a good bye... Thank you for listening to me... you are the first to do that.... i hope your lives go better than mine... these are my last words... good bye!!!!|
|21 Mar 2004||Christine||In the first place i would like to ask... Why do you want to do such a thing? I am a mother of a 7 yrs old boy who lost his father to suicide when he was only 18 months old. I to this day am in a new relationship but still suffer from this awful thing called suicide. My son to this day asks questions about his father and cries every night to have his father near him. You don't just hurt yourself doing this you also hurt many people who love you after you end your life. I till this day miss my son's father and have many unanswered questions that can never be answered. I am also depressed and is on antidepressants but that would never make me end my life. I have thought about it when i was younger but now i relieve how much it hurts the people you leave behind. So please don't ever commit suicide before you even think about it go get help please.. Do it for the ones who are left behind when you would be gone....|