|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|04 Aug 2006||muriel||hi there.
I've read almost all of the messaged that have been posted on this site. Some people approve of this site and others don't, but people will always have different opinions on almost everything.
Ever since i was 12 i have had suicide thoughts. I thought about committing suicide and i even dreamt about it. Now i'm 16 and 2 weeks ago i was so desperate i slitted my wrist. I had had a fight with my boyfriend and i had just received a message on my cellfone, coming from my best friend's parents, telling me that he had died that very night in an accident. after reading that i could no longer think reasonable and i went straight to the kitchen where i picked the biggest and sharpest knife i could find.
the next moment my clothes were covered with blood and so was the floor. I started panicking because this was not like the usual cuts i make. I could not stop crying and my boyfriend wanted to take me to the hospital because i could bleed to death... he was so upset =(
then he bandaged up my wrist so that there would be pressure upon it. 2 hours later i felt very weak and at that moment his dad came home. Luckely for me his dad was a nurse and he stitched my wrist so i didn't have to go to the ER.
The first thing my boyfriend said when he saw all that blood and my wrist that was literally sliced open was that it was over, that he broke up with me. he said he had warned me many times before that one day i would go too far. Afterwards he told me that he had only said those things because he was angry at me at that moment and that he loved me so much and didn't want to lose me.
But still... i was shocked.
shocked by his words and shocked by what i had done. This made me realize i didn't want to die and it's sad that it had to come this far before i realized it =( so please... and i'm saying this to everyone who's reading this right now.. it may look like you have nothing left to live for, but just think that if you're feeling bad now, it can only become better... if you need somone to talk to.. i'm here, you can always add me on msn or send me an email.
I'm not saying i don't want to die anymore, because i still do and i don't know if those thoughts will ever fade completely, but all i can do is try.
i'm thinking of all of you.
-*x*- muriel -*x*-
|01 Aug 2006||Terri||1.Suicide hotline number e.g. Samaritans
2.Chocolate (makes eveyone feel better)
3.Number of a close friend.
4.A few stories written by the families of those who have commited suicide.
Anyone who wants to "play" suicide needs to seek help. It's not again and it destroys more than one life.
x x x
|27 Jul 2006||Pete||I am a police officer and have seen not only the effects on the person involved when they dont succeed but the family when they do. You dont want to do this, it hurts and it affects everyone. You, your family and believe it or not, everyone that has to pick up your dead and empty body, no life, no soul, nothing. Do you know what they do to your body when they do a post mortum? Life is important, there is nothing after this life, so make it good and make it worth it NOW!|
|25 Jul 2006||Bob||I'm 43 and tried to kill myself several times over the years. At age 10 I would pray to god to let me die. I did get that prayer answered and it came by way of hiv, and of course I tried killing myself afer that but I'm still here. I guess I'm writing because I'm bi-polar and so was my neice, I say was because she killed herself 6-6-06. She picked a dozey of a date. Her birthdate was 12-6-78. She like me and likme most of you on here feel hopless and or feel nothing. I promise you, as someone who has lived through the attempts and losing someone that I love so deeply, you will make it. Hold on hold on hold on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You never know what the next day will bring. I thought I'd never find love, especially with hiv but I did at 42 years old I got married. I thought life was forever going to be wonderful but then my niece took her life. I could kill my self real easy right now but it want bring her back and it might not put me with her but it would kill everyone I love and that loves me just as a large part of my heart has been killed by her death. If you can't feel consider yourself lucky. I wish I couldn't feel but I do and I don't want to die today cause I know I Will die one day and I can rest till then I'm giving the good fight. I pray for you all and I still pray for myself cause I'm always at risk of falling. That's why I've created my own living death escape. I have fixed a closet just for when I need to escape. It has a pillow a blanket and anything that I might want to have. I sometimes take in a teddybear. Close the door block out all the light put in ear plugs and close my eyes and just float. Try that the next time you feel you need to escape after all thats what killing yourself is all about, escaping. If we really where going to kill ourselves we would do it and we would not be here asking for ideas. Your reaching out, showing your pain and in doing so will releive some of it. But always HOLD ON. You ARE worth being here!!!!!
|24 Jul 2006||Jemma||There has never been a good way to commit suicide! And there never will be! I have tried many times to do it and I have always failed! But now I have slowly come to relise that yes it takes guts to commit suicide but it also takes guts to stand up and say that I will not go without a fight! Life is what you make it out to be! I fought bullies every year at school! i eventually dropped out because i couldn't take the pressure! They laughed and hurt me and dragged me so far down that I did not care about what i was doing to myself or friends/family around me. I wanted to belong so badly, but made myself an outcast! I cut myself, hurt myself in ways that caused so much pain to myself and others, that I felt ashamed! I hid my life and hurt my life, but i am bouncing back! Suicide is no way to go! I am now a football coach, i have 4 beautiful nieces and 2 handsome nephews who look up to me. My best friend sees me as strong when times get rough! I broke my family, but i am now repairing it slowly! Suicide is no way forward! Is is an end to a challenge! So don't stop fighting the challenge! Goodness eventually comes to those who wait! It came to me.....|
|21 Jul 2006||gina||Please Kids I beg you as a person who is still suffering from the things I have done to my body don't do. I have try many different things from drugs, pills, and even poisons. I remember I time when somebody would hurt me and I would go somewhere, get a knife and cut myself and alot of you think I am stupid but it would make me feel relieved so kind of why. I was fat, ugly, I was told I was never amount to anything I father left me at the age of 7, sisters, mother,brother would beat me. when I turn 13 mother left me to live with her boyfriend. I was molested when I was 8, so I struggle with a homosexual desire. that was some more for kids in school to pick on me about. the reason they found out was because they caught me stare at a couple girl with short clothing on. I mean I thought I was these sick, monster. I the age of 15 I got into witchcraft thinking to myself this is where I belong. while I worked but it made me become evil. I started steal, and doing to people or their food or so on. I thought I had this great power. I ever got deep into sucide. I thought I was powerful than an God into one day when all the the pills, poison, and alcohol had taking its control of me and I was dying I knew I was going to Hell everything start happening so fast.I felt I didn't want to died. but any I will have to go into details for you another time but away I got saved. and now I am a mother with four kids in college and loving being a christian I know this is hard to believe but the people who knows me would say diffently|
|20 Jul 2006||ForeverPhoenix||I have been looking at this website, and trying to think of a good answer to this question, and i have come up with this.
If you are having feelings like this at the age of thirteen there is obviously either
1) a deep upset in your life caused by trauma or abuse
2) OR (as in most cases) You aren't getting the attention you need and this is the only way to deal with it.
I have been a self harmer from the age of 15 (I'm now 20) and made a crappy attempt at cutting my wrist when my life just got too much.
Looking back, i can tell you how i feel.
I FEEL LIKE A FOOL
You (myself included) cannot know what your whole life will be like according to your school days. It is a naive attitude, and for people who are so into their own mortality, quite narrow minded.
My best friend tried to kill herself unsuccessfully last year, and the night she went to hospital, part of our friendship was abliterated forever.
SUICIDE IS SELFISH!
So people dont like the way you look?
Lots of hollywood movie stars were bullied at school for being 'ugly'
So your parents are shit to you?
I bet half of you are lucky enough to have parents that are still together.
AND! the worst reasoning i have seen
the boy at school doesnt like me / my boyfriend dumped me by text message.
Just. grow. up.
At the end of the day you may not be lucky enough to have faith in anything, but i know there is someone in your life you look to for support. Go to this person and seek whatever you need. Whether it be a quick cuddle, attention, or maybe just going for a walk to cool down.
If you havent any of these things, then ignore the self rightous people on this site that glorify suicide, and do me a favour.
Take the time to grow up a little bit.
Not only is it worth all the amazing things life can throw at you, getting married having kids, making friends, and numourous adventures with people you care about.
AND MAYBE, one day there will be another lost soul who found their way like me, who can look back and say..
How stupid was I?
|19 Jul 2006||ant||i am still a teen now like but when i woz like about the age of 10 i tryed 2 kill my self. i had a loveing famly and all that but the 1 thing that i cud not cope with woz what i woz goin on at school. i woz getin bulled by about 8%of the school. so after about 4 yr of this i try 2 hang my self by looki ma grandad came in as i woz about 2. he maned 2 talk me out of it all and he sed 2 me " ant ur goin 2 be lafin at all of them in 2 10 yrs when they r all bums" and just gim sayin that maed me feel so much beter. i am so glad that i did not do it no and forall u ppl that r thinkin ofdoin this just think of what u can have goin 4 u and all of the loved 1s that u r goin heart and now lookin bk at this i no i cuz no do this 2 the ppl that i love!|
|15 Jul 2006||liz x||When i was a teenager i tried to kill myself by slitting my wrists because i was an alcholic and i hated my life. I was sexually abused by my step father and made to believe it was my fault. I've never met my real dad which has flung me into depression like a yoyo all my life, and to top it off my boyfriend dumped me by txt msg! Looking back i cant believe i was so messed up that i was willing to let what other people have done to me make me risk my own life, to do so would be to let them win, but thats what drink does to you. when your drunk you become a different person and that person becomes addictive, you want to be that person all the time, so you drink some more.I was having suicidle thoughts anyway and i turned to drink to help me forget my tattered life, but it just made me dwell on my past and present situation even more. At my lowest ebb i also took an overdose as i felt i had nothing left to live for. But then one day i met my new boyfriend and he introduced me to Jesus. I know some of you are probably reading this and when you got to this part were realy dissapointed but please carry on reading, because for alot of us the thing we desire most that drives us to the brink of suicide is a desire and need for love. And i want to tell you about the greatest love there is. When i became a Christian my life was a huge mess but through prayer my heart has been healed. The self loathing i once felt for myself and the hate i felt for many others has gone and been replaced with a love that i have never experienced before. Its not just a family love though the church does become as a special family to you, its not a sexual love or any other kind of human love. Its a divine love that heals your mind body and soul and can pull you out of the deepest pitt in your life no matter what if you have faith that God loves you. Some of you might be sitting here thinking God could never love me because i'm a horrible person and not worthy of anyones love but your wrong! God loves you no matter what. God even loved adulf hitler! He hated what he did but as Robbie Williams says so wonderfully, "Hate the sin not the sinner" Please try and understand that Gods love is for everyone no matter what you've done, where you've been or who you are, and if you you want love and to be loved, then right now where your sitting look inside yourself and tell God what you see and what you dont want to see anymore. Ask him to show you his love for you, ask him to come into your life and heal it. I dont expect you to take my word for it so please ask God to prove it himself. Dont expect this to happen in a flash, for some it is a gradual process because you would'nt be able to handle the change in you that God will bring straight away and only God knows when you are ready and he will never rush you or speak angrilly to you. He is a God of love and only love.
If you want to know God tell him you are sorry for the bad things you have done and ask him to come into your life and help you change.When you pray ask of it in Jesus' name, and put amen at the end of course :o) Thankyou for reading my story if you let it i promise it will help.
|14 Jul 2006||Sam||Im 15 ive been counciling now for years ive been suicidal for long i don't belive in quick answers or all that normal people bullshit they treat us like we're abnormal but we're not we the normal ones if u need help or just someone to chat bout how fucked up life is or answers to ure qeustions contact me firstname.lastname@example.org|
|14 Jul 2006||Axel||It's up to you. Don't wait for something to fall in your lap and instantly fix everything though-nothing will do this, not even religion. Happiness and self worth is something you choose.
No matter what position you are in you have the ability to make someone else feel like they're worth something though--a long time ago I thought "my life sucks, but maybe I can keep someone else from feeling this sad" and tried to be happy and giving for the sake of other people--whose lives still mattered to them. I surprised myself by discovering this made me happy, and was also surprised to find I could be of value to others. Try to find someway to help someone-and you'll find worth.
And what does life achieve? Joy
|12 Jul 2006||mark||Honestly....at 13 years old, suicide is not an answer. You have not lived enough of a life to know what lies ahead for you. You are still in school...or should be. You have so many opportunities to change your life, don't tell me it can't be done. Take the energy that you have to end your life and focus it on doing something with your life....what do you want to do with your life....what do you want to be in life...you have so many years ahead to make mistakes and learn, so much time to meet the person you are meant to be with. At 13, you just don't have the knowledge of life that allows you to make such a decision. What are the main reasons for a 13 year old to commit suicide? I can't find anyone to love me, nobody likes me...keep in mind, as you grow older, those people will slowly fade from your life, and new ones will enter...people who have the same problems, people who are more accepting of others....you will have chances...choices.....yes, things will not always be perfect...you will make mistakes, things might not go the way you want them to, but you never know what can happen. My cousin was a nobody....just hanging out, snowboarding, doing typical teenage stuff..someone saw him snowboarding...next thing you know, he has been on a TV series and made a few movies...and it just happened out of nowhere....so you never know. Give life a chance...it might suck at 13, but you have not even begun to live life...wait until you hit 25-30 years old and see if you feel the same way. I am 46...and I am on the verge of "going to sleep"....have felt this way since I was very young...but someof the thiongs I have done in life I would not trade for anything...yes, I am desperatly unhappy with myself and the way things have turned out for me....I put my heart out for people and they have used it for a doormat....I have lost everything and screwed myself up for doing it. But even at 46, I know that if I choose to, I can make things better for me.....problem is I am tired and just want to go to sleep. So I am struggling with this right now....and when I cam across this website....I just have to say.....give yourself time....wait til you are out of school and give the real world a chance. Get a job....move from where you live...once you ebter the "adult" world you will see that so many more doors are open for you.....got a dream? Follow it...ya never know...you might just catch it if you try..but if you are gone, I can tell you that you never will|
|09 Jul 2006||QUEENB||i wanna die to releave me pain,
i wanna die with alot of pain.
i want to see blood and feel its pain,
i wanna hert in such a different way.
i dont wanna live ive given up,
i cant handel the pain ive had enough
enough is enough its all i can take
people wisk my emotions like baking a cake.
living on energy god knows were from,
guaranteed i wont live long.
to hard but i have tried
tried to mend my hert inside.
i wont to go slow with so much pain
i dont wanna live another day,
on a lonly one sided emotional train.
that was me at 18 now 22 after 4 years of counselling im finally happy and can deal with things in such a different way. im now studing to be a suicide counsellor .PLEASE LIFE HASENT EVEN STARTED THE GOOD DAYS ARE YET TO CUM, PLEASE GET SOME HELP OFF A PROFESSIONAL NOW ITS NEVER TO LATE TILL THE DATE!!
|08 Jul 2006||tasha||when ur under 13 life sucks! all the posh girls trying to get the boys attention picking on u cause the biyz like u 4 who u r not cause u straighten ur hair, do ur nails, worry about wat u wear. its all sad. live sucks sumtimes cause people themself make you feel so low. they pick on u 4 no reason. just cause ur urself. dont make urself 2 be anythin ur not it just aint worth it. believe me ive been beaten up 6 times by boyz brought through hell an back also tried 2 commite suicide|
|07 Jul 2006||I'm me and thats all I'll ever be||Less than 1% of all people who try to overdose by painkillers or sleeping pills will actually die. Most will vomit, some will not. All experience a massive amount of pain or discomfort.
People who die from painkiller overdose die from liver death. This means their liver stops functioning. It takes days or weeks, sometimes even months. It is a truly horrible way to die.
Overdose is not the way, unless you have a lot of medical knowledge. Jumping from a bridge or building, 12 stories or more, will always be the quickest and easiest way.
Even if you don't know it, there is a god, and he feels your pain. Don't give up. We only ever do our best in life, and that's all anyone can ask of you.
|06 Jul 2006||ryan||a letter from my best friend and lover,
Some of you are probably wondering why I ended my life, some of you are probably angry at me, and some of you probably don't care. I think it's pretentious to write a suicide note, but it seems to be the thing to do. I don't possess the literary ability or vocabulary to adequately express the pain and hurt I feel inside and have felt for many many years -- this letter will just scratch the surface.
I woke up in a motel room in Moscow Idaho about two months ago with the realization that my life had strayed very far from how I always imagined it would be and that I didn't know how to correct it. I'm not exactly sure how I came to this point but I'm sure that it happened very slowly over a long period of time such that I didn't notice the changes.
I've thought of suicide and various points in my life since I was 15. My experiences in high school left me deeply scarred. I came away from those years feeling fundamentally broken and not good enough. I always thought I could shake those feelings in adulthood, and have learned various techniques to distract myself from them, but they still haunt me. As much as I've tried to rid myself of certain feelings I can't shake the idea that I'm not good enough and that I am unlovable.
I have never liked myself. When I look at myself in the mirror I see only flaws. When I am out in public, I compare myself to everyone I see and never measure up. I feel completely and totally crippled by my insecurities. Why would anyone ever want to love me when I can't even love myself?
In the last month and a half, I've woken up every morning and cried. I cry partly because I wake up at all and partly because I am in so much emotional pain. When I've thought of suicide in the past it has been more of a passing thought -- just an option. Two months ago I began to think about it again but more seriously. I spent a month searching for a reason to stay alive, watching people, traveling, thinking, trying to distract myself. I couldn't find a good reason and began to feel like more of an outsider as I watched happy people going about their happy lives. I spent the next month planning the details of my suicide while trying to appear as normal as possible. I simply began to disengage from life.
I have always been a stupidly optimistic person. I have always believed that people are fundamentally good at heart. I've always believed that love could heal me. I've always believed that I would find the "one" that I would spend the rest of my life with. The last few years have treated me to a series of incredibly painful experiences and disappointments with a few moments of pure joy in the middle. As I look back on those years I realize that I have only myself to blame. I am the only one responsible for my life and for my actions. The optimism I always held onto so proudly no longer exists within me. I feel like I have failed at so many things lately.
My first grade teacher once told my mother that I was the most creative child she had ever seen. Remembering that comment makes me smile and then makes me sad. I've used it as a measure of my life and feel like I've failed that teacher and myself. At one point I possessed a creativity that has been all but destroyed by my own insecurities and self-doubt. I used to believe that the creativity would return if I conquered those demons, but I'm now 32 and am haunted by the same things as when I was 22. I am a decade older and have very little to show for it.
I am incredibly sorry for any pain that I've caused anyone because of this. Not wanting to hurt my family and friends has kept me alive for a long time, but my pain has become unbearable. Please know that I have finally found the peace that I've been searching for for 17 years.
I am grateful for everyone who has been part of my life. Notwithstanding the pain, I've
had a pretty good life. I've met incredible people, I've fallen in love, and I've traveled
May he rest in peace!
|27 Jun 2006||joemonday||For all you kids here is my story. I am in my 40s and since the age of 13 I also wanted to commit sucide. I dont drink, dont take drugs and dont hang out with the wrong group. I am married and have no kids. I was doing a search on google and came across this site because at present I am having those same thoughts because I feel like that I am not needed by anyone. My job situtation here in canada is bleak. Working a low paying service job is pathetic at best beccause prior to sept 11th I was in a High tech field. Many of you may wonder why I have not attempted sucide long ago. I suspect its hope and the fear of what may happen to my soal after I leave this earthly place. For any of you who are kids and want to consider it find somone who CARES! Dont go to your friends. Thay are not trained professionals in this area. Teenagers will often ignore your situation. Trust me being a teen is one of the hardest times in your life. Life does not get easier. I relize there is different forms of depression. Mine is mostly event driven ie, loss of job is my big one. Seek help and especially from somone who cares....thats the most important aspect. DONT hang around people who are a negative influcence. If you friends are into commiting crimes, putting people down getting into fights then change friends.
Again I cannot emphisis this enough...stay away from people who are a negative influence and epecially those who take drugs.
|15 Jun 2006||Kelsey||Im 19. I tried to kill myself Feb 28 2006. I slit my wrist and cut 6 tendons and my median nerve and I can't feel my fingers any more and I can't use it like normal ever again. I am in an abuisve relationship with my boyfrind that I'm still with. We got in a fight one morning and I said I wanted to die than be there. So I got a big knife and hit my arm with it like 5 times and the last time it sliced my wrist open like 3 inches. I freaked and we went to the hospital. The bills are around $$$60,000!!! I figure if I'm gonna die somebody else better do it, cuz now Im more fucked up than I was before I slit my wrist.|
|02 Jun 2006||natisha||Look whoever that audrey person is...dont bloody listen to her shes no help at all! she makes you more depressed!!..me and my brother tried to commite suicide together 8 months ago...we both took 145 tablets each...my brother ricky died...i lived...he gave me the tablets that didnt matter if i took 1000 of them they wouldnt make any difference and he took all the 800g tablets his body couldnt take it..i only vomited.. and i had to sit and watch my brother die...he was only 17..(im 15)i tried to save him but it was too late and now i have to live with that everyday of my life...but im guessin that he knew something i didnt...because a month ago i gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby girl called latisha perez( im half spanish)...and that means at the time me and my brother commited suicide i would have been just 2 months gone...i know my brothers looking down on me and latisha everyday...i thank god everyday for latisha but i cry everyday for the uncle she could of had...theres always other solutions rather than suicide.. you dont have to think about the ones taht will hurt if you die... becuase your pain is the most important but think of the future when these problems have gone and what you can have and if its over an ex or a boy or even a girl...the father of latisha left me when he found out about my brother...and he hasnt ever seen latisha but im in love now...with my fiance and hes a great father to latisha and has helped me threw all the bad times so just remember when theres nothing left..maybe its becuase your looking to hard...sometimes you just have to sit back and wait in life...everything comes together in the end..dont listen to the people that put you down or laugh at your problems...they dont know you...smile lift your head up and show them that your strong enough to rise above them...dont waste your life ..because in a few years you can show people that your worth more than they are and that youve made it through...be strong and think of the things youll miss out on..people come and go in our lives but its up to us whether we're srtong enough to let them go...xxx|
|01 Jun 2006||Beck||ma mate killed herself about a year ago and i really miss her and want her back but it is really saddening to see or hear about someone killing themselfs we need to help people over come it.|