|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|13 Oct 2007||Carly||I don't know whether I suffer from depression, or whetheer I just get very sad.
I'm 30 now and it has happened for as long as I can remember. From nowhere, the darkest cloud imaginable decends over the valley inside my mind. Positive thoughts cease to exist. I can almost see myself from the outside in, and I will know that I am only entering a "down" time. But I can't help but ignore any sense that I have left and I just sink lowere and lower into a depression.
I can't function. I'm usless at work and dread interaction with people. I question my ability. I convince myself over and over again that I have no friends, no future and no point.
The first time I tried to kill myself I was around 9 or 10. I can't remember why, but I remember isolating myself and feeling very lonely. Luckily, at that age I didn't understand how to kill myself and nothing came of it. I have entertained the thought ever since, but with age I also gained a conscience and now matter how low I have gotten since, the thought of putting my family through a never ending nightmare will always stop me from commiting suicide. I feel like that will always leave me in sort of perpetual hell, but there just isn't anything else I can do.
While my adult years have seen more depression than my teens, some days I feel like I am on top of the world. Perhaps if one day my entire family all die in the same plane crash, maybe I will finally kill myself. Or maybe I won't. Things I see or things I feel keep me going and you never know what is going to happen next. When I was 15 I thought I had seen everything. I thought life would only get worse from then on. But it isn't like that, it becomes immense and infinitely opportunistic.
Try to be a little stronger. See if it helps. See if it gets you to the next day and then see where that takes you....
|11 Oct 2007||Mr Nobody||sometimes we all wonder what it would be like, sometimes i do, like the sarvo, apparently the message i tried to post earlier did not get through as usual, but sometimes i cry when i try to think about it.. ending your life.. permanently when sometimes there is no need.
but its not always the way.
most studies show that alot of kids today have suicidal thoughts and are depressed, usually they just need someone to talk to, some one to relate to..
|09 Oct 2007||Mary||Just wait. You can always kill yourself at any time but you can never take it back. I've been plagued with daily suicidal thoughts for many, many years now and I can't take it anymore either but I do know that it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem. If nothing else helps, know that life is temporary and we will all die someday. I'm very sorry you feel so bad. So do I.|
|08 Oct 2007||rebelliouse||i've tried killing myself 5 times, and never have been capable. i started trying to comitte suicide at the age of 10, i'm not 13 and i've realized that i'd rather live then die, that i don't know who loves me or who trusts me, but that i want to see what's out there in the world for me. i can't say that i know the best way to kill yourself because i've fail 5 times all different ways, but i can say, that all it's goign to do is leave the ones who do love you behind very upset, you wont ever get to see what your life would have been like if you kept living it! I'M NOT GIVING UP YET! BECAUSE COMITTING SUICIDE IS ONLY GIVING UP AND TELLING THE WORLD YOU DON'T WANT TO FAIL YOU WANT TO GIVE UP! I REFUSE, AND I HOPE YOU'LL REFUSE WITH ME!|
|04 Oct 2007||listen alot of you may have remeber ken he wrote here quiet a bit well this is his father his last message was that he had enough with life and tonight he was goiing to end it well he wasnt lying about 3 days after that he took his hunting rifle and shot himself in the head ending his life so what i am say is this dont kill yer self it is not worth it because the pain you fell now is nothing compared to what your loved ones will feel after if you want to think about that then i cant stop you but i think it is not a good idea if you like to talk to me about yer isssues or about ken you can email me at kens email firstname.lastname@example.org
take care all
|02 Oct 2007||rain||i dont know the best way to kill your self.i dont think there is a best way. i think thats what everyone needs to realise. that we dont need to be the best, we dont have to succeed in everything.
i think you should try to take life a day at a time....dont think about the future...ignore what everyone else does or says.
im not saying im right...but i know that tkaing life a day at a time has helped me.
i think about killing myself everyday..but i never do, beacuse i dont have the guts.
and if you dont have the guts...then rmember it can be a good thing.
|30 Sep 2007||Andrew||I'm seventeen, I guess. I don't know if I want to kill myself. I want myself to want to. But I don't know if I do. I don't feel things anymore. I'm disgraceful. I think I will.|
|25 Sep 2007||Chris||Honestly, I'm not going to sit here and type about how all high and mighty I am and judge your point of view. Who am I to tell you to " get over it " or " grow up, everybody has problems "? I think thats not only ignorant, it's irresponsible. Someone who wants to commit suicide quite obviously doesn't need someone making them feel worse. I was suicidal from the age of 11, it's instilled in me a hatred for the number. Very recently, I have found the love of my life, and exponentially, my condition has gotten better. I never expected this to happen, but i guess that's the beauty of life. You just never know whats going to happen. So my only advice is this. Please don't try suicide, it's fine to think about it, but if you go through with it, there's no turning back. If i'm giving you this advice, me a total stranger, just stop and think about all the lives you would ruin with such an act. Please, fight for them, fight for us. And just...live.|
|23 Sep 2007||Me||I will say that I am shocked to have found this page while doing a search for helping children deal with the suicide death of a parent. Its been a little over a year now that my partner of 10 years turned our lives upside down. we have 2 boys ages 9 and 4 now at the time 8 and 3. This happened a week prior to my oldest sons birthday. and the destruction thats it has caused is beyond description. I dont think people actually realize that the life you live isn't yours and yours alone. its a part of everyone you know and everyone you've met. and thinking that your demise will make it better and others just sad is a huge understatement. it makes the lives of those left behind stop. There left feeling empty and numb. The things that were important are no longer. Its my belief that those who succeed in this die once, and those who live, the ones who have to attempt to pick up the pieces to try an create some sense of normal in there everyday lives die over and over again. My life nor my childrens,his family as well as mine, we'll never be what we were. The person I was doesnt exist anymore. And wondering the what ifs drains me that much more. I think its important to talk to someone and if the first person doesnt listen find another theres always some one who will. Im only writing on here because I can relate to both sides of this. The intense guilt Im plagued with now sometimes has had my thought twisted. I think we all need to tell ourselves and eventually believe that were important. And that we matter. Take into consideration there is nothing to be gained and that life can be a beautiful thing , And the down points some of you have are points in which most everyone has felt and someone can relate to . its a matter of how you deal with them. As I said a few lines up find someone that you can confide in and trust, and the talk. Get it out, the more its bottled up the harder it will be to deal with. I wish for hope and happiness to find you all.|
|23 Sep 2007||Jordan||Im not 13 but 16 but age is nothing. When you look for the day its not there.
I thought alot about suicide I use to cut myself but all that did was get me in a mental hospital! That was the worst. It made me want to kill myself even more. Im not like anyone else (or it feels like it) I drinked smoked dope, had horrible friends who were bad.
Didnt go to my classes (Mc minn county High) The only reason was that I was afraid people wouldnt like me. I had to be moved out of the school or be sent off. I had a horrible tobbaco problem but recently I quit cold turkey that was horribly misserble. Now Im 16 and home schooled no friends absolutely 0! IM lonley and I dont do my work.
You probably would say get over yourself you fuking idiot (sound like my dad.) and do your work but Im so depressed I coundnt find the will to do anything exept sit and get even more deppressed. I almost blew my brains out with my shotgun He he That would be wierd seeing my brains and not finding my mind. Mind is nowere to be found or blamed. I read that the only way you can truly die is your ego. When you die
Physically your body just goes right to the earth again. A never ending cycle life is there is no end. Exept your mind thinking theres an end.
Not even death is an escape for me exept sometimes I want to go numb and drop dead but I go back wondering how I got here. Death is going to hurt physically or mentally hurt. I figure just zoning out in meditation and then there is no me. The only me is the me looking for the me and thats endless.
Thanks for reading
|19 Sep 2007||Broken||Well, i dont know the best way to kill yourself when your under 13, i would say its the same way you could do it when your under 100. I want to do it, reading this site has in a way helped talk me out of it a little.
But when your contemplating suicide, some days its "i dont want to die" other times its "i cant wait to die..and soon!"
Just a small comment to those who think suicide is dumb, stupid, selfish or whatever other insults you want to say..it doesnt help, it makes me feel worse, i want to do it more.. Hows this.. I feel like a failer because I chicken out in committing suicide-- I do think of friends and family who will get upset, my dog, what will happen to her? But then I feel like a failer while I am alive. So either way I feel like a failer.
Im not a rich kid, but rich kids get sad to, I have been thin and fat, felt pretty and ugly, been a captain, champion, leader, popular, and been teased, abused, and scared.
People dont want to live for many different reasons, and no persons reason is less worthy of suicide then the other. Because im no expert but when it comes to suicide, everyone is in the same boat, all in a dark place, suicide taking over the brain day and night, thinking if you ask for help it means your not that serious about doing it.
I just want the pain to stop, so if its not going to stop while im alive, i hope it will stop when im dead.
|17 Sep 2007||Jamie Malinowsky||Ok listen.. killing yourself isnt the way to go.. my father just commited suicide and he left me and my 2 sisters on the streets.. you want to kill yourself? so than take a look at the people who love you and what you will do to them. Killing urself is a choice that you hold, but if your only fucken 13 years old, you have ur whole life ahead of you. why would you want to kill yourself when your life hasnt even started yet. I watched my sister suffer from cancer and watched her die right in front of me.. she didnt have a choice to stay alive and your going to take it for granted.. have u ever heard of the quote, " i felt sorry for myself cuz i had no shoes, until i met a man who had no feet" .. this is getting ridiculous, seek help for crying outloud.. suicide isnt something to fuck with, and if ur that selfish than maybe u should die and let a cancer victim live.|
|16 Sep 2007||ohhh i like secrets.||you are soooo totally not reading this right now. you are dreaming. in this dream you feel trapped. when you wake you will find yourself frightened and laying in a warm puddle of freshly despensed urine. upon closer inspection you realize it isnt urine its sweaT. you are just feeling all kinds of fucked up shit because you took a shit load of pills trying to kill yourself and ur in the hospital with all kind of tubes hooked up to you. later that day you find out you have been in a coma. for a week and a half. at this point you feel like a failure because you cant do anyfuckingthing right. even tears wont release the pain you feel inside.
now i could keep going. but i think i have illustrated enough. what im trying to say here is overdosing on pills isnt just something you can say oh lets take some of these and these. oh and these too. no. it dont work like that. cuz if you fuck up like i did you could be typing a post on here like me. one handed. i had a fucking stroke and now half my body dont work cuz the nerves are dead or something. oh so go ahead take what you want. now i cant even stand up to get to the pillz to try again. i cant even kill myself. i guess im lucky i can still wipe my own ass.
i guess theres always starvation.
|02 Sep 2007||Sara||Honestly, it's not worth it. I know that if you're going to kill yourself or has thought about it, that you've heard that line, and it pisses you off because you belive it is. but trust me - from one suicidal person to another - it isn't. when i was 14 i walked out of my house with a noose in my hands. my parents didnt know, and neither did either of my siblings. i went down to a tree where this other kid had hung himself. i went there because i had gone down there a lot to visit with the kid (yes wile he was dead, i would talk to him, pray for him, stuff like that) and so i thought that maybe if i did it there - it would make him and i closer. i understand that his spirit isnt there and that the person that i talk to is only a matter of my deranged mind. however, i had gotten into position and everything and kicked the cross that was holding me up, yes, the boys cross, over and my brother and his friend just so happened to be walking down there to get to the river a little bit more south and they saved me. i again tried after a few months (once i was able to handle rope and everything on my own without being watched) i almost had it but the spot i put it on was rotted a little bit and i didnt notice it. i fell down and hit my head on a rock... and was passed out for about 4 hours. after not being home to check in my sister came looking for me and found me with the noose around my neck. considering i wasnt going to try something like that again, because 2 fails and i'm done, i dont belive in 3 times the charm. i had decided to drink poisen... and my dad for some reason had come home from work early and found me half dead and called poison control. so yea - it's not worth it cuz if you try it something is just gonna fuck up your attempt anyway. so - it's been a year since my last attempt. i'm not allowed to have any sharp objects, which makes no sence to me because i'd never cut myself, i'm not allowed to have any kind of ropes, i'm hardly allowed to touch belts. scarfs i cant use - even in dead winter. and when i clean a bathroom or something i'm to be watched. they dont understand my state of mind. in my bedroom is a computer, my bed, a tv, a stand to hold it up, my guitar, closet, dresser, a stereo, and my nightstand. now - i can kill myself with any of these items. trust me - i could think of some sick way to kill myself with a peice of paper if i had to. but they think that with those things - i'm save. but honestly, i'll never be safe. and i'll never get my old happy life back. for now - the only thing i have to live for are my two nephews julian and deandre. shall they ever get taken away by my sister i of corse would die inside a little bit more, but i want kids because of how sweet and cute those two little guys are. so seriously - just try to look on the bright side of everything -weather it be your closest family member dieing or anything else that makes you so upset that you cant take it anymore. because if you look at the little things, you realize that life IS worth living.|
|31 Aug 2007||Kira||I grew up poor. My sisters, brothers, and myself were all molested or raped. Incest was a big part of growing up for me. My mom, my stepdads, and her boyfriends all physically beat us. From the age of twelve, she slept with her husband and boyfriend, so that made me look at women badly(even though I am one). I do look at men worse than women. I was considered a genius, but when you grow up being told you're worthless, most of my abilities were wasted. To the person that said," Quit being stupid and call someone," I'm offended because my siblings and I called many times. Nothing long term was ever done. They would investigate, but my mom was a good liar, and they would ask the questions right in front of the parents, so most of the time we were too scared to answer them. After a while, you start to be really sarcastic. One time, I told the social worker,"I'm bloated, constipated, I got a boil the size of a walnut on my ass, and the last sex I had was with a halloween pumpkin. The few times they took pictures, we would move before the investigation was done. We lived in our car for a while after one incident because my moms crackhead boyfriend lied and said he had land in Alabama for us to live. That was just to get us to run from the cops with him. I moved out at sixteen, at first with friends, and then with my boyfriend. I graduated with honors, and I have no idea how. I've struggled with thoughts of suicide my whole life. I even tried to kill myself. As an adult, I had to drop out of college, lose my place, car, and I pawned most of my stuff because of a drug addiction. Anyways, after all that I'm off drugs, and I have a career in clerical administration. I'm with the same boyfriend that I was with when I moved out seven years ago. I am so glad now that I didn't kill myself because there are so many things, I would be missing out on. I am going back to school. I'm the only one of my siblings that graduated from high school, went to college, didn't get married at sixteen or eighteen, didn't have a kid by sixteen, and there is only one other that isn't on drugs. I hope you can get through this now. Also, I wasn't saying not to call the cops. In fact, I hope the abused do call the cops, I was just saying I understand why some don't.|
|28 Aug 2007||medicated||i know maybe where u are its illeagle. but when i want to blow my brains out i smoke some marijuana. kinda takes the edge off.
i would also like to say that anything harder than puffin on the green will just make it worse.
but seriously it works for me. cuz i got problems. dont wanna go it to it. but i can actually THINK now cuz it calms me down.
maybe puffin on the tasty treats isnt for you. but you need to find out what will help you THINK. it only takes three seconds of openminded thought to change your mind to a positive non suicidal state. this has been tested and proven. three seconds. versus u aint comming back. well im gonna get me a bowl of ice creame and take a nap now.
much better than brains on the celing.
|26 Aug 2007||hanging on||I've been suicidal since i was bullied at school for guess what??????? being pretty! i tried everything and even tho im not like totally over trying to take my life, I KNOW its not the way out and at 13 you really only just need people to talk to...i dont have anyone who understands me..i never really have but trust me if i can live this long knowing each day when i wake up that i have no one n so many problems then u can. I suggest (if u can't talk to ur folks im assuming) u try to get an appointment with a consellor of some sort and just let everything out, and even though u never go back to see them..that one day can help u live through the problems ur having. Like someone said before, u have someone even if its just one person in this whole world that actually loves you please hang on to that.
You probably have a great future ahead of u...most people from my former school who were bullied like me are now popular teens that everyone just wants to hang out with. Life's like that, u could be the king of the playground in kindergarten and a street sweeper as an adult, and in most cases the bullied, no friends, standing on the wall unnoticed kid in skul becomes mr/ms so successful as an adult.
I know i sound hypocritical as i am suicidal myself but i must know life gets better coz im still here...n planning to be...
|26 Aug 2007||Everyone's Mom||I am a 41 year old mother of 3. On 8/16/07 (Thursday a week ago) I went to check on a friend that did not show up for dinner and found she had committed suicide. It was HORRIBLE beyond anything I've every experienced myself. I will NEVER be the same. She chose a violent end to her life, the big F-U to everyone. It has changed my life in so many ways but all of them are for the better.
As a teen, young adult and even as long ago as a month ago, I had considered this same path for myself. I WAS WRONG! There is NOTHING in this world worth leaving it. Tomorrow is a better day and if not the next day gets better. I've stood in my front yard screaming at my friend for leaving me with this horrific image in my mind to carry, alone for the rest of my life. My children have had to watch me hallucinate and sob for days over this but as I come out on the other side, I realize, and I have shared with everyone around me, that there is KINDNESS in this world. There is beauty in EVERY step we take, every breath we breath, every tear we shed.
My friend was consumed with rage, anger, hopelessness. She bathed all of us in it with her passing. If she had thought with the part of her that cared for others she NEVER would have left this burden behind for the rest of us. She left me a note. Her soon to be ex-husband won't give it to me because he's a jerk (one of the reasons she chose this path). I refuse to let it bother me. I refuse to let this man make me miserable the way he did to her. I know she loved me.
If you are considering leaving this life, please take a moment to think about your future. You can and will escape those that have wronged you in the past. Especially if you are young. The BEST revenge is to live well and prosper. You can, but you have to make the concious decision to do so. You are worthy of this life. You are here for a reason, you have hope and beauty whether you believe it or not.
I've chosen to channel my grief into making sure that EVERYONE who crosses my path knows that they are WORTHY of life and value. The fact that you are here means you still have the chance to make a difference in the lives of society. Hang on to your future. There is HOPE.
I came to this site hoping to find a way to cope with my own loss and I see that there are others that have shared my own pain and thoughts of leaving this world. Now that I have been touched by someone who has I can tell you that IT'S NOT WORTH IT! You will never be able to "SHOW THEM" from the grave. You CAN show those who have caused you pain by walking away from them, step by step into the bright light of THIS world. Don't leave us. Whether you actually feel this from the people close to you, there are those of us that truly understand your pain. We have had those moments of despair and RAGE. Ending your life will not exact revenge on those that have hurt you because they still have life. They will move on. Stay here, with us. SHOW them that you are of value. I don't even know you but right now as I sit here I'm telling you that YOU HAVE VALUE! Go outside, look at the full moon. Look at a sunset, look at your child, look at yourself. Words and hurtful actions of others cannot bring you down. There's someone out here holding on for you and you don't even know it.
Please, please, please, don't leave us. This life is worth living and your are worth living it. Whether or not you realize it you are loved, you will be loved and life will go on.
|24 Aug 2007||john paul||i have ben reading this site all day to find out that killing your self is not the way to make things better event thow some times i dought my own words .i have lerned alot from here one of the many things i came to realyze is every one here is alone and it feels like no one understands u no one loves u well as hard as it is i em going thought the same thing u guys are going thourght right now and i came to the conclusion that in a way we HAVE EACH OTHER BECAUSE WE KNOW THE PAIN IN EACH OTHER VANES this site is very powere full in a way it can be nagative or possitive depending on how u try to face it but honest le this site is perfect for thouse seeking help because u look on how to kill your self and u see other people testemonys and how they try and try and how they share but who knows maybe that is what we need to now from each other because DEPRESSION IS EVIL AND IT CAN AND I WILL KILL U if u dont evercome it so realy look at your selfs and think of things u can do to change who u are because its not easy and i will never be easy if you dont try to fight it and if u thing people dont love u because of the way u are maybe its time to take in some consideration and changing who u are for the better but death is never the awnser i em still learnig that fell free to email me if u feel confortable and i will be there to listen and try to understant but dont forget YOU ARE NOT ALONE BECAUSE WE HAVE THE SAME PROBLAMS AND THAT MAKES US UNITED!!!!!|
|24 Aug 2007||El Cid||If you are under 13, and wish to kill yourself, it can be done. But understand that one experiences the most emotional and philosophic time of their life at this age. It is traumatic, but as fire to the phoenix you emerge brilliant and worthy of awe.
If you are young and wish to die, I humbly submit these alternatives: angst. contempt. honor. defiance. courage. grace. duty. indifference. respect. allegiance. spite. bravado.
There is no better way to tell the world to fuck off than to spit in the face of adversity. Suicide is an admission of defeat. Why fall on the knife when you can twist it in another's ribs? Figuratively speaking, of course...