|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|19 Nov 2007||Dypthericholy||To all who meander about on the earth, searching for the meaning to life and humanity...This is it: We eat, we shit, we fuck, and then we die. There is no afterlife, there is no God. Hope? Make it yourself. Purpose? Make it yourself. My name is James and I have attempted suicide many times. My arms are scarred, and I know intimately the taste of charcoal, and most days I still don't know whether or not I'd be better off dead. But if you want my anti-suicide advice it is this: Wouldn't you like to continue eating, shitting, and fucking? That's all there is to life, after all. If you can love that, you can make it. You certainly don't have to love yourself. I don't.|
|17 Nov 2007||I am a suicide survivor. My son committed suicide and I just want to die. Last week I put a belt around my neck and I almost killed myself. I miss my baby boy so much more than anything in this world!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why did he do this to me? The pain is so horrific I just want to be with my baby boy. I will never never be happy again in my life until the day I die.|
|16 Nov 2007||witheld||I find it hard to go out, Im 31 and married. I dont expect anyone to understand that, so thats fair enough. But occasionally the thought of ending my life does cross my mind, although Ive never tried. It would be so much easier than living like this. I have the woman-from-hell living on my street, who really does make my life hell whenever she sees me, snide comments, nasty looks, half-threats etc. Id expect that of a 12 year old, not a grown woman, even though she IS a chav. I live in a tiny village, so cant blend in like in say, London. I dread going to get my kids from school, knowing I'll see her there. I cant see my life getting better.|
|12 Nov 2007||tina||hey. i came to this site like years ago, man. mouchette has been 13 for the past few years. who is mouchette? no idea. i've gone through abuse, was mentally unstable, and suicidal. got locked up in a psyche ward for a week. life is what you make of it. suicide is weak. its basically telling everyone you give up. but really, think about it. what is it that makes you so depressed? or angry? figure out what it is that makes you feel that way and overcome it. that's life. that's strength. i still live with an abusive father, but i'm working on it. i have a case filed out and hopefully my therapist and social worker can help me move out. you only get one life. if it's fucked up, don't whine about it. nobody can fix it for you. find support. find help. get yourself back in your game. find out what makes you tick. suicide can really eat away at your insides and make you feel like total shit. i know, and i've been there. you're too tired. too empty. and you feel alone. find reasons, and the small things that can pull you free. you only get one life, and be anything you want. seriously. that was me right there. life can't get me down, because seriously, i'm winning. you can email me if you need somebody to talk to.|
|09 Nov 2007||Casey||I wish my sister had known how beautiful, smart and talented she was. Everyone else could see it- But she still chose to end her life before she'd even left high school. In the year that followed her death I watched my mother age 20 years in one, I would cry so hard I would vomit, and my daughter will never know her wonderful auntie. Bad stuff passes- and your left with the wonderful . I know my sister would regret her decision so much now when she's missed out on everything. When it feels like no one would even care if you're gone in reality you will break at least 20 peoples hearts. Just take one day at a time and I promise it will get better.|
|09 Nov 2007||Jammy||It made me cry reading these answers. I tried it 3 years ago and I assure you it was terrible. I ended up having to see a Psychiatrist and its taken me 3 years to feel better. The feelings creep up on me every now and again but I go and talk to my doctor about it and she is really helpful. Please seek help and don't suffer.|
|08 Nov 2007||lisa||If you are seriously thinking of killing yourself, then you MUST talk to someone. I was very suicidal starting at age 13. In my early 20's I finally told my mother and she got me a Christian counselor. This counselor talked with me every week for 2 years. during the time I spoke to her, she had me tested to see if medication would help me. I went on the medication and I have been on it ever since. I'm now 30. I have not had one days worth of depression or suicidal thought since then. Some people don't have enough seratonin in their brains. If they don't, they will be very depressed and unable to cope with their problems. You may be one of these people. Don't kill yourself until you find out. Good Luck!|
|05 Nov 2007||brad||hi its me again and i just want to let mouchette know that even thought maybe ur life is dreadful and painfilled...ur lucky that u have life so many of my loved ones have died and i really dont appreciate that u want to kill yourself when ur fine u dont have cancer or anything at all so quit complaning this is not funny suicide is no joke at all so stop being so stupid u are all blessed because u guys are fine this note may not mean anything to any of u but i am really mad that u guys are thinking of suicide enjoy life! (its so short)|
|05 Nov 2007||brad||well there is endless ways to kill yourself....and sometimes life is just not fair and hatefull.i dont recommednd 4 som1 to kill them selves but who am i to tell them right?so if u want to end ur painful life nice and easy without pain at all u can leave the stove on and let the gas fill the room and u will die nice and easy because of overdose on gas chemical..i know this because i almost ended my life and my best friend actually died because of this i was in a coma for 3 years.once again im no one to tell any of you wat to do but if u like take my advice.=)|
|05 Nov 2007||BaZaaR||Trois personnes que j'aimais énormément se sont enlevé la vie au cours des 6 dernières années.
2001 - Mon père
Je crois que la maladie mentale a eu raison de lui. Parfois, il se sentait suivi, épié, regardé ; souvent, il se sentait seul ; par moment, il devenait une autre personne ; un jour, une chose le faisait rire, l'autre jour cette même chose le faisait pleurer. Il était pris dans un monde de contradictions où il ne semblait plus trouver sa place. La mort fut son choix. Sa vie, il n'en avait plus le conrôle. Il a cependant eu le contrôle sur une chose : sa mort.
Son kit de suicide : barbituriques en quantité monstre.
2004 - Mon ami A.
A. avait connu de graves problèmes à l'adolescence. Il ne voulait plus manger parce qu'il se trouvait laid. Il croyait que pour être aimé, il fallait être mince. En même temps qu'il maigrissait, il commencait, petit à petit, à changer d'attitude envers les gens : mentir sur sa vie, sur son alimentation, sur ses fréquentations et sur son usage de plus en plus marqué de cocaïne. Mythomane professionnel, il cherchait l'amour dans le mensonge. L'amour, il l'a cherché, mais ne l'a jamais vraiment trouvé. Des relations multipliés, des relations physiques, sans plus. Je pense que personne ne l'aura jamais connu comme je le connaissais... Sa vie, il la racontait différemment à chaque personne. C'était sa façon personnelle et particulière de devenir important au yeux de quelqu'un. Un matin, je reçois un appel de ses parents. À ses pendu dans le garage durant la nuit. Un mal d'être inguérissable pourrait-on croire... Un geste irréfléchi sur l'effet de la cocaïne ? Je ne crois pas. C'était pour lui sa façon de se détacher de ce corps qui s'était dressé comme un mur de béton entre lui et l'Autre.
Son kit de suicide : un cable électrique accroché au plafond du garage.
2005 - Mon ami M.
Mon ami M. était avec mon ami A. le soir de sa mort. Tous deux en quête d'amour dans un nightclub, ils s'étaient séparés en fin de soirée alors que, fidèle à son habitude, A. devait quitté la discothèque parce qu'il ne se "sentait pas bien", parce que tout-à-coup il voulait disparaître du regard des autres qui lui était insupportable. M. laissa A. retourner chez lui et retourna faire la fête dans le club. Nous étions tous un peu habitué aux réactions soudaines de A.
Le soir là, A. est mort et M. ne s'est jamais pardonné de l'avoir laissé partir seul du club ce soir là. S'en est suivi le départ de M. pour une autre ville afin de se faire une nouvelle vie à Montréal. Bien que nous étions proches, je ne connaissais que peu de choses sur ces états d'âme. Il était toujours souriant. On m'avait pourtant dit qu'il pleurait souvent. Moi, je ne l'avait jamais vu pleuré. Il semble que la mort de A. l'avait affecté à un tel point qu'il lui était impossible d'accepter la mort de son ami. Son déménagement nous a éloigé.
Un an plus tard, bien que nous nous sommes parlé à l'occasion, M. Revient dans ma région et pour une dernière fois, nous avons été prendre un verre et discuter ensemble. Il me semblait bien triste et il disait ne pas savoir où sa vie le menait. Un mois plus tard, M. est retrouvé mort dans sa chambre, chez ses parent, pendu lui aussi. À son poignet, le bracelet noir et blanc que A. portait le jour de sa mort.
Son kit de suicide : une corde toute simple.
Et moi là-dedans, et bien moi je n'ai jamais jamais oublié le corps mort de mon père lorsque je suis allé l'identifié à la morgue. Son corps noir et bleu, le sang séché qui lui était sorti du nez. Malgré cette image d'horreur, je voyais sur son visage une expression de quiétude et de délivrance. Il avait l'air bien. Je n'oublirai jamais le corps embaumé de mon ami A. qui semblait si peu naturel, comme un mannequin de cire, lorsque nous sommes allé le voir au salon funéraire, mais que j'aurai aimé voir se lever de son cercueil pour qu'il puisse constater à quel point il était aimé de ses proches. Je n'oublierai jamais ce que le prêtre à dit à la fin de son discours sur mon ami M. lorsqu'il a dit "Ton ami t'attend en haut, tu vas enfin pouvoir le rejoindre.".
Je suis probablement l'une de rare personne en se monde qui ne condamne pas le suicide. Je crois que ces personnes ne se sont peut-être pas senties assez armées pour livrer le combat de la vie et qu'elle ont décidées, à leur façon très personnelle, de chercher quelque chose de mieux pour elles. Quelque chose qui n'est pas corporel, quelque chose qui n'est pas matériel.
Il y a des blessures qui ne guérissent pas, quoi que l'on puisse en dire. Moi, j'ai fait le choix de vivre et d'accepter le choix de la mort de la part de ceux que j'aime. Ma vie, je veux la vivre avec ma joie, mes peines, mes blessures, mes plaies ouvertes et cicatrisées, mes petits bonheurs, mes regrets, mes souvenirs, mes morts, mes désirs. Je ne crois pas que ces expériences soient plus ou moins des motifs valables de choisir la vie que ceux qui ont fait le choix d'aller voir ce qu'il y a ailleurs, après la vie, telle qu'on la connait.
Je respecte le choix de ces gens que j'ai aimé. Je ne le comprends pas, mais qui suis-je pour les juger ?
|31 Oct 2007||Toni||To the 13-year-old that wants to kill him/her-self: DON'T!!! I felt that way for years. I grew up believing that no-one loved me, and that I was better off dead. I'm 27 now, and I still look at suicide pages to see if anyone thinks I'll still go to heaven if I commit suicide. I've never been picked as anyone's favorite person or BFF, but I'm sure you have a best friend, which is more than some people have. Sure, your mom seems uncaring, but I think she feels that if she ignores it, it'll stop you from thinking about it, or wanting to carry it out. That doesn't mean she doesn't love you, she's just in denial. Baby, you've got your whole life ahead of you, and you'll still meet so many people who'll get to know you and love you just as you are, so, please, don't give up on life yet till you've experienced all that is coming to you. What I think you should do now is try to get to know and love yourself, cos no one will love you if you don't love or respect yourself first. Please try.|
|28 Oct 2007||sarah||become an overweight White middle class American kid with conservative parents and a big room all to yourself so you can sit in it everyday after school alone and drive yourself mad with selfpity and sel hatred all in one. Then do something stupid and self and never realize how huge the world is and that if only you had waited to grow up a little you would've been old enough to watch American Beauty and Girl Interrupted and felt better about the fact that pain is beautiful adn we all deal and that's how we connect in the first place with one another. Pointless?? Only the old man on his death bed can truly testify to that. So go ask him, see what he says.|
|26 Oct 2007||rana||I have been into this site like a hundred times and I've read alot of the comments,feelings and issues people have. Yeh maybe suicide is stupid, maybe it's wrong, maybe it hurts others. We might all be here for some reason or purpose or maybe not. Suicide could be a solution or could not. The truth is what everyone is saying is just words. Just their opinion and what they think. Yes I have good days, bad days, days when the world needs me, days when everyone would be better off without me. Most of all what I've noticed when reading everyones thoughts is a recurring theme. You've got people who just write what they write just to pass some time. You've got the potential suiciders who are blaming little or big reasons for their suicide attempts or feelings. Whether it be people around them, the way they look, what someone has done or said. You've got the good samaritans trying to save the would be suiciders. Then you've got the anti suiciders who are just pissed off. Why, only God knows. It's not like they will change anything by being pissed off.
I have all these feelings that the potential suiciders talk about. Sometimes I surprise myself that I'm still here. I think I'm too chicken to do anything like committ suicide, although I think about it all the time. Or maybe it's just that I don't really want to do it. I might not be at that point where I can't take it anymore.
Basically I belive depression is a disease. Nobody can tell you it's right or wrong because you can't help the feelings you are having. It's an illness that eats away at you until you can't take it anymore. This leads to suicide. There is no right or wrong in this situation. There is no accurate description or solution. There is no one treatment and there is not one person or situation to blame. Everything that we find to blame is just a catalyst. Words are words and opinions are opinions and nothing more.
When you get to this state of mind and you want to end it all nothing makes sense and nothing is real and whatever anyone says it just doesn't make a difference. What each person needs to decide is what they will do about it. If a friend tells you they want to end all are you going to get pissed off and not understand. If you think it's all over are you going to end it all. Or maybe you can recognise it's an illness and try and get some help. At the end of the day if the help you get doesn't work then you always have the option of ending all, but you never have the option of taking it back.
I totally understand any decision any person makes because at the end of the day it's their life and they know how much they can or can't handle. For anone who is against suicide let me tell you this. There is nothing in the world worse than waking up and feeling dread.Not being able to look in the mirror. Hating every word you speak or someone else speaks. Living in a bubble where nobody understands you. Hating yourself or the world to a point where you don't want anyone looking at you, talking to you. Feeling like you want to crawl out of your skin. The rotten feeling in the pit of your stomach or the feeling of dread in your heart. Sometimes you can snap out of it if things are really good, but as soon as something goes bad again he feeling returns with a vengeance.Thinking of death is the only sane thing, the only thing that will help you escape from how you feel. You will not be able to suffer or feel this pain anymore if you end it all. If other people will suffer as a result of your death is not real, if you are in this state of mind. If your life is no longer important then how can other people's suffering be important. You need to feel for people who see suicide as their only option, because it is a living hell in that big black bleak hole.
ITS CALLED DEPRESSION GUYS. I KNOW BECAUSE I FEEL IT AND ALTHOUGH I HAVEN'T BEEN DIAGNOSED I'M SMART ENOUGH TO KNOW WHAT IT IS.
And yes there is medication for it, and yeh maybe things will help if you look for a solution and yeh maybe suicide does feel like your only option.
Just remember, whether you are suffering as a result of someone who has ended their life or you are thinking of killing yourself, you are not alone. Hundreds of thousands of people are going through the same thing every second. There is no right or wrong, but at the end of the day if you try and help yourself and it doesn't quite go the way you want it you can STILL KILL YOURSELF. So maybe theres no harm in trying to get help. But what would I know. Because these are just my words, my thoughts and my feelings.
|25 Oct 2007||Just Trying To Help||if you kill yourself i will kill myself. just because i have a shitty life with shitty friends that do nothing for me or treat me good doesnt mean i will kill myself, sure some of you may have a worser life than me but until i meet some of you i think mine is in the top range of worse life category. i wont give many details but i will say ive been through alot, parents divorce, cps, foster care, protective custody, group homes, sent out of state, homeless, been on numereous medications, loner, wanderer, gothic, cutter, suicidal and have suffered depression for as long as i can remember. i want to give up so bad and shoot my fucking ass sometimes because of k.c of utah. but just because shes a bitch and makes my life a worthless shitty living hell doesnt mean i am going to do it. yeah life sucks when treated bad, or whatnot but please dont give up there has to be some happiness out there for you just like somewhere there is some for for me! lets do this together i promise not to kill my self if you promise not to kill yourself!!|
|25 Oct 2007||Kaye McClintock||This is not pretend, this is not a game... this is real life situations!!!Why would you want anyone, especially children to play suicide games? You should be asking what is the best way to live not the best way to kill yourself! These people have severe emotional problems and they feel they have nothing to live for. They are hurting and your are not helping them. I am posting because I want to help these poor lost souls and because I care about them. Listen, all of you who feel like you want to die and you think there is no hope or anything to look forward to. Life is the answer!
There is hope for a better life and hurting yourselves and death is not the answer. God is your answer and your hope!! It is God Who can set you free from all your pain and sorrow. Turn your hearts over to Jesus Christ our Lord. He saved me and He will save you! The Bible says; "I lift up my eyes to the hills-- where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1-2 I also am putting a website on here where you can get professional help. There are more out there, like this one.....please, search them out! I do hope and pray all that I write gets posted on this website. I want all of you to know you are in my prayers. God loves you so much, please let Him take control of your lives and drive those demons from you. God will make your life worth living, He did mine! He saved me from killing myself, He saved me from continally hurting myself, He saved me from my sins!! Please let Him save you!! With Him, all things are possible!!
Love in Christ, Kaye
|23 Oct 2007||Mark||Tired and Beaten, i dont know if it will help you but just telling somebody how you feel wont cost you anything, and might help you see a different way forward?|
|22 Oct 2007||Aloise||No the rain won't go away. But that's the trick of it, you see. Because the world is darkness. It's already there. The only thing you can bring is light. Are you going to bring something or are you going to give in? Giving in is denying who you are, which is light. Even if your light is incredibly dim, almost out, you are still light. The only way you can lose this light is to choose to die. But as long as you're still alive, you do have it. So hold on, or better yet, do something unneccessarily kind. Laugh at how stupid you are. (You are stupid, you know.) Watch the light grow, just a little. Then try to make it bigger. It's an intoxicating, powerful feeling. It can become your pet project, your chia pet on the window sill. See how big you can grow your light.
Another thing I'd suggest is sprouting a sweet potato:
I'm still too obsessed with killing myself to try this, but they say its fun.
|21 Oct 2007||16||I have tried suicide once before and I have thought about it as of lately. I've come to realise something. Its permanent. And I'm grateful that I didnt complete suicide the first time. I was only in grade 6 when I tried it. I would have missed so much. I would have never found true friends, or my own identity. I have also become a little more secular over the last 4 years, I'm 16. Before I thought that if i commit suicide I'll be in heaven. But now I wonder if there is a heaven, and If there isnt and there is nothing after life, then what's the point of me going black. The thing is that life does get better, and sometimes the really hard events, such as having no friends, feeling unloved, ignored by the world, or dealing with complete morons for parents, does help you to see it. There is always another alternative to suicide, and no matter what it is, and what some of the consequences are, you have to do it. Just stop caring about the people who make you feel down and do it.|
|17 Oct 2007||someone||i've been depressed since i was 8 but i thought about commiting suicide until i realized it would'nt help me i asked for a punching bag for christmas when i was 12 to turn my depression to aggression and anger and turned the bag into a pile of sand and rags and became one of the best child boxers in the state...please don't commit suicide|
|17 Oct 2007||dead inside.||there are people all around me, yet i feel so alone. i miss being hugged and feeling like the person was hugging me cause they actually cared about me. i don't know how to explain it really, just been feeling alone. a little confused. a little frusturated. stressed. worried. nostalgic. numb. pessimistic and optimistic all at the same time. sensative. weak. so so weak. alone. lonely. alone. lonely. depressed. intimidated by the world. rejected. restless. tired. so tired. melancholic. empty. drained. stupid. pathetic. worthless. ugly. dirty. indifferent. contemplative. nervous. discontent. lethargic. sad. hopeless.
so many words. just one truth. i'm alone. i'm alone. i'm alone.
"I am unbreakable but it looks like I could sometime soon
And you are unreachable about as possible as me touching the moon
I am unraveling unbearably empty
and if this ground gives way I just hope that youll catch me."