|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|01 Apr 2008||Megan.||I'm only 14 and you probebly wont believe me when I say it but, I would say the best way to kill yourself is to not. Trust me, its better. I've attempted suicide 13 times and for some reason I'm still alive. When I think about it, I realize what I'm leaving behind me, my friends, and the people who love me. Sometimes I feel like they dont love me, and I often feel that way all the time. I dont want to whine about whats happened to me, whats happened, happened, its how I feel now that makes it worse. I hate waking up every day and seeing the smiling faces of everyone, you see how they really feel, you can see if there hurt, or if there happy, but for some reason, my best friend cant understand how i feel. I told her how I was feeling, she cant tell I feel it now. Its not even been a year since I told her. She doesnt understand that I'm asking for her help. Now I know killing myself cant help, but just thinking about how nice it would be to not feel any of this. I still stand by my statement, just dont, just imagine how you will leave your family. Like some people stories tell of how bad there family life it, imagine how they would take it, your family would go deeper into there bad habits. I find it would be horrible to leave my family in a worse state than now, but anyways, just think about it.|
|21 Mar 2008||Javier Duran||Well, the last time I posted on Mouchette, I was pretty much an asshole.
I have a beautiful girlfriend now.
And I'm turning 14 in June.
Life got much better for me.
Much, much better.
Then, I got arrested for Possession of Marijuana.
I still felt life was boring.
I have all these girls that love me.
I have my whole family that love me.
I have all my friends that love me.
And I let them all down...
I just wanted to try it out, 1 joint cant hurt?
I got caught by miracle, long story, don't worry about it.
But I qualified for Civil Sitation and I'm doing my hours as we speak.
Life got really bad after that, again.
Everyone thinks differently of me now, as if I'm the worlds biggest pothead..
None of my teachers trust me now..
I still have all the girls in love with me..
But I can't do anything about them because I have a girlfriend and I love her to Death.
And, idk, life seems pretty empty now.
I look back in life and I remember seeing myself in the future being something.
And now I can't see that anymore..
I feel like I'm going to fail in life.
Thats not what I want....
I'm pretty suicidal now
Really really suicidal...
I just need someone to talk to besides my girlfriend, or my family and friends.
Someone who might understand what type of mind fuck I'm going through in my life right now...
Please, talk to me
MSN : Ultimatesin380@hotmail.com
AIM : Purplesinmonkey
In all that is good, grand, and peace,
|16 Mar 2008||Vicky||At the age of 6 i was in and ou of hospitals than the fukin nurses were.. trust me... im only 16 now. and life is getin really hard, just split up with my 17 year old boyfriend, i now have a 26 year old... hes hard to please, but hes gorgeous and everyone really likes him, before he came along i tried to kill myself, walked str8 out infront of the 26 year olds car.. ended up in hospital. then he told me how much hed always loved me since he knew me.. now im happy.. gettin married.. expectin a bby.. nd livin with him.. yes i know im only 16 but trust me... if u even consider killin urself.. think wot could be said or happen tu yu .. sumthin good could cum out of it after... x|
|16 Mar 2008||Zack||Hey guys my name is Zack, i have tryed to kill my self several times and failed. i have had an extremely painful life from being abused from my father after my mother and sister were killed in a train accident that i was in and seeing them left me cold. and not even a month later i watched my cousin kill himself infront of me. there is alot more that has happiened to me and i am willing to share it and help other people that are tihnking about killing themselfs, i am here to help email me please and it may save a life..|
|12 Mar 2008||totally doing it||from time to time i enjoy coming to this website and reading posts. does this make me sick? should i consider suicide? and if i do consider it, how will i know its the right choice for me?
from time to time i spank myself and choke myself. i dont really enjoy it. i dunno why i do it. ive always wondered wtf is wrong with me. its just what is wrong with me has this overwhelming sence of apathy. im not sure if suicide is for me yet. definite maybe though. and im still contemplating the method. however i know when/if i do, previous to doing it im going to put like 10 toy cars in my anus so the coronor will be all wtf??? im sure they will laugh. maybe not right then. maybe later when they are about to go to bed.
im a lil antisocial too so if u email me and i dont email back for a lil bit its just cuz im argueing with myself why i should get out of bed to brush my teeth, but if i dont maybe they will all rot out and i can starve to death instead of doing it myself.
i ussually end the argument by telling myself this is stupid and begin laughing in a high pitch tone thats not quite a laugh but not quite a deep crying sound like a child getting beaten. i made a lot of those when i was a child.
all i know is i was on the bridge sitting on the edge and a big truck pulling a trailer came flying by and the wind almost and then i got real sad cuz it didnt knock me off. didnt matter though. prolly wouldnt have killed me just broke me up real good.
sometime i wonder if i just rub shit all over me if people would leave me alone.
i saw a woman in my dreams last night. she was naked and squating in a corner of a room eating her menstrual fluids. i remember thinking in my dream i wish my mom did that to me. the dream was silent. i remember i could hear my tear drops falling. i woke up laying sideways on my bed. i felt queezy.
oh yeah dont email me if your gonna say a bunch of crap about hope or living or relatives. seriously i already have problems.
|10 Mar 2008||amelia||so ive wrote to this before but it wasnt posted??
nway so i was suicidal and i kinda rite got passed that and im jus feeling down but nothing i kant handel rite?
somthing goes wrong w/ my bf and i then yea ill prolly go thro with it..
but jus recently my bf cheated on me and i hate my parents who lock me in my own house i sneak out and go get drunk till let loose
its not a good thing but i do it and i usually jus make a complete fool of myself and get mad at the world more less im an emotional bipolar drunk lol but otha than that its fun sum nights.
Nway so i decide that suicide sounded good it was very selfish but hey we all can be at times.
but jus recently my bf and i discussed and i mite be preganant and that gives me a reason to live. if iam or not jus the thot of a baby and my bf soon to be my husband together and we both want this than life is wonderful :]
i need to live to be there for the ones i love you
I hop u think about that too wen it comes to your life!
|06 Mar 2008||Aimee||LISTEN PEOPLE!! I AM A 17 YEAR OLD GIRL AND IVE PROBERLY BEEN THREW MORE SHIT THAN GOD HIMSELF! (I AINT RELIGOUS) I AM HIGHLY DISABLED (ARTHRITIS) IM ON CHEMOTHERAPY AND HAVE TO TAKE 17 DIFFERENT PILLS A DAY!!! IVE TRYED SUICIDE 4 TIMES AND IT NEVER FUKING WORKED!!! MY EX BOYFRIEND HIT ME AND THEN LEFT ME FOR MY BEST MATE 2 DAYS AFTER WE SPLIT UP! WE WERE TOGETHER 6 MONTHS MY DAD TOUCHED MY BEST MATE BACK IN 1998 AND I HAVENT SEEN HIM SINCE MY MUM IS A ALCOHOLIC AND MY BROTHER HAS ADHD MY STEP DAD HAS HIT ME AND I USED TO GET BULLIED!!! GUESS WHAT HELPED ME?? MY MATES I WOULD GIVE THEM A CALL TELL THEM HOW I FEEL AND THEY WOULD BE THERE! SOME OF THEM HAVENT BUT I NOW KNOW WHO IS MY MATES AND WHO ISNT! LISTEN TO ME IF YOUR THINKING OF DOING SOMETHING LIKE THIS CALL SOMEONE! DONT WORRY ABOUT THE TIME!! IM SURE THEY WILL B HAPPY THAT YOU WILL STILL BE ALIVE IN THE MORNING!!! MY NAN DIED WHEN I WAS TEN AND I CANT GET A JOB BEACAUSE NO1 WILL HIRE ME!! I SLEEP WITH BOYS TO MAKE MESELF FEEL GOOD! BUT NOW I KNOW LIFE IS WORTH LIVING!! IF YOUR YOUNG THINK ABOUT THIS FOR A SECOND... DO YOU WANT KIDS? DO YOU WANT TO BE A NANNY? GET MARRIED? GET A HOUSE WITH 6 DOGS? AND IF YOUR OLDER WITH A FAMILY JUST THINK CAN YOUR KIDS SURVIVE WITHOUT U? WHO WOULD TAKE YOUR KIDS? WHAQT ABOUT YOUR HUSBAND OR YOUR MUM OR WHOEVER? LEMME TELL YOU THIS THEY WONT COPE YOUR FAMILY MEMBERS WOULD BREAK DOWN AND FEEL SUICIDAL!!! WELL THATS ALL I WANTED TO SAY BUT SERIOUSLY CALL SOMEONE! CHILDLINE OR ANYONE! THANK YOU XX AIMEE|
|05 Mar 2008||Marisa||There is no best way... I'm 18 years old and I've always struggled, sinced I was little. My dad would cheat on my mom and take me with him to that skanks house and her kids would call him dad... then when my mom was dumb and took him back he made us move up north away from everyone all my friends and family just because his dumb mistake. Well, me and him never talk, we don't have a relationship && I feel so so bad for my mom who's worked all her life just so he could sit on his ass and cheat on her. He moved out on us twice, one to this apartment and then another time all the way to California for 5 years. I hated him, for leaving and hurting my mom. In those 5 years my brothers starting selling things they shouldnt doing things they shouldn't && everything got worse. He finally came back after again cheating on my mom. He never talks to me, theres never a happy birthday, merry chrsitmas or even a hi. He doubted me in everything, he thought I would never graduate, that I would never have a life and still treats me like shyt. My mom works to much to have a good relationship with me but tries to have one soooo hard with him when he just uses her. I couldnt have a job till after i graduted. I graduted and still havent got my job. Also this year I was diagnosed with signs of lupus and rheumatory arthritus, also mild tourretes. ((I'm only 18)) I get sick easliy and my diseases can persist to get worse. I stay in my house often passing the day in my room, thinking I'm not shyt because of all that's happened to me && how my life is now ((extremely depressed)) yea I thik at times to not be here becuase what reason do I have? I have no life, I don't have money no transportation I don't even now how to drive because my parents were too busy for me. My favorite brother is about to go to prison for 5 years for sum bullshyt. I try so hard to keep it together it's hard but I do it because in stead of reaching out for sumthin to end it all, all I have to do is reach within me and I get strength... I ask for help and I get it, and that helps. I've lost friends and close relatives and hell no it's not easy especially when they're so close to you, but never doubt yourself and no matter how much you go through there's always a reason to live. I don't think I would be here today if I hadnt reached within myself for strength and talking helps. I still continue with these problems but Im stronger than them, than all their shyt and It can't bring me down. Your young like me and even though it seems so hard already it gets better because now I'm enganged and In love and I wouldnt end my life for that. I hope you find your reason soon to and you will && you can always e-mail me... please do.
|03 Mar 2008||Cori||I got a threatening email too. The person asked if I realized what I had posted to. Yes... I do realize what I posted my story to. The moral is I watched a friend attempt suicide and it was horrible. No matter what killing yourself is only a sign of weakness. I told that story on this website because I want YOU to understand what others will feel through your actions. I hope everyone who has ever had a suicidal thought reads my posts. Its NOT the way to deal with issues in your life. Everyone has ups and downs throughout life.... EVERYONE! Rather than contributing to this website, go to one that is a support group who can help you sort your thoughts into a more positive manner and hopefully help you continue your life forward rather than ending it.|
|28 Feb 2008||Cori||I want to share something that I went through today. I received a phone call from a good friend of mine saying goodbye and telling me to tell his children how much he loves them and that he just couldn't take the pain in his life anymore. I immediately called 911 and drove over there without stopping for red lights or stop signs. The paramedics barely made it there. He was almost dead... Now if you are someone who is thinking about committing suidcide please listen to my thoughts as being someone on the other side and going through what I went through today. My friend did have a lot of issues going on in his life of which aren't changeable overnight, but everything can be worked through. When I got to the house today the paramedics carried him up the stairs and wouldn't let me go near him. They sat him down on a chair and asked him what his name was and he didn't know. They had to hold him up just to get him into the chair to give him some sort of a shot. I finally was able to walk over to him and I looked at him in his eyes and didn't see my friend anymore. He was almost dead and I could see it!!! I could see it!!! I promise you that no matter what your going through in your life at least one person loves you... Imagine the feeling they would feel if they looked into your eyes and you weren't there.. I was lucky enough that they saved him and hes in the hospital now getting help Please... get help!!!|
|22 Feb 2008||Eden||I understand that when some people say and think that suicide is a selfish act that they mean it, i understand, I've been there...But also I think that they need to wake up. Suicide (for me) isn't about hurting any one else of making them feel guilty. suicide is a way for me to express emotions that are too dangerous to feel. Suicide is a way to get even in life. I'm 16 years old but i feel 82.
I don't blame anyone (maybe my "father") for my life, but there's no reason i still need to live in it when it tries to kill me everyday. This way i beat it to the punch.
|22 Feb 2008||sarah-lou||this site should be removed! my friend committed suicide last week, her parents found her hanging in the attic!! its awful but u guys dont understand what it does to everyone u know! she left no suicide note, she left nothing, no reason, i mean she was sooo happy, well seemed to be~! its a cowards way out!! u need to be strong!! love yourself!! dont just think about yourself! think about everyone else it will affect, gran , grandad, mum, dad, cousins, auntys, friends, everyooooone!!! its hard!! and dont ever use it to gain attention, people will just think u r crazzzy! just get a job and a life and u will be fine|
|20 Feb 2008||Dakota||dont kill ur self
i no this jus makes it sound lik a normal give advice but its not
i am 14 i actully jus turned 14 i cutt and cutt and cutt its the only pain i can control but its not the way i recomend to live out your life its miserable nd sad jus think if u grow out of it or things brighten up for u then ull b glad u didnt kill ur self
im your age i no how you feel but its only a way to run from ur problems wether your poor, rich, geeky, popular it doesnt matter everybody feels this way from time to time i mean im a cheerleader and i wanna kill my self every moment but its not something i want somebody else to go through because its jus a sad sad sad way to get out of ur trouble..... please please please dont kill urself please
|15 Feb 2008||lucy||my friend just the other day tried to stab himself to death - he was just depressed he is 12 and he survived some how. about a year ago my sisters friends sister hung herself. it was an accident. her mum wouldnt let her go to a sleep over so she mucked around with a rope on her bunk bed and killed herself|
|14 Feb 2008||Bob STROZEWSKI||LET ME TELL YOU ALL ALITTLE SOMETHING// SUICIDE IS FOR COWARDS. LET ME SHARE ALITTLE STORY.. REAL LIFE STORY..HOPE IT CHANGES YOUR MINDS.
FOR MANY YEARS MY TWIN BROTHER AND I WOULD GO FISHING TOGETHER, TALK EVERY DAY ECT WE WERE SO CLOSE..MY LIFE WAS HIS AND HIS LIFE WAS MINE.. I COULD NEVER HAVE IMAGINED WHAT LIFE WITHOUT HIM WOULD BE LIKE.. UNTIL 06/25/08 ..
THIS DAY I DIDN'T HEAR FROM HIM, I COUDNT GET AHOLD OF HIM.. THIS IS THE DAY THAT CHANGED
MY LIFE FOREVER..
MY TWIN BROTHER WAS FOUND AT HOME HE HAD TAKEN NUMEROUS TYLENOL PILLS, SLEEPING PILLS AND ALCOHOL.. HE WAS BARELY ALIVE WHEN THE AMBULANCE ARRIVED.. HE WAS TAKEN TO THE TRAUMA UNIT..FROM THE LOOKS OF HIS BEDROOM YOU COULD TELL THAT HE SUFFERED TREMENDIOUSLY.. BLOOD AND VOMIT ALL OVER THE ROOM. HE COULDN'T EVEN FIND THE STRENGTH TO REACH HIS PHONE 2 FEET AWAY FROM HIS HEAD.
THE AMOUNT OF SUFFERING IN THE TRAUMA UNIT SUPERCEDED HIS OWN PAIN. WITH THE AMOUNT OF THINGS THEY DID TO HIM TRYING TO SAVE HIM.. THE LAST THING HE SAID TO ME WAS I AM SOO SOOO SORRY. I SAID I LOVE YOU BILL.. HE WENT INTO A COMA. HE WAS AIRLIFTED TO THE BEST HOSPITAL 3 HOURS AWAY.ALL HIS ORGANS WERE SHUTTING DOWN..FOR 5 DAYS I WATCHED HIM LAY THERE AND SUFFER HORRIBLE PAIN. HE WENT THROUGH A LIVER TRANSPLANT. DIALYSIS AND SO MUCH MORE. FINALLY AFTER 5 DAYS, I TOOK HIM OFF LIFE SUPPORT. I HELD HIM SO CLOSE AND SO TIGHT FOR 5 DAYS. I TOLD HIM EVERYTHING I WANTED HIM TO KNOW, I PRAYED, I BEGGED, I PLEADED WITH GOD.. I EVEN TRIED TO SELL MY SOUL TO SAVE HIS.. THE TIME HAD COME I WATCHED HIS BADY OVER THE 5 DAYS FILL WITH FLUID, HE GAINED ABOUT 50 POUNDS. WHEN YOU HELD HIS HANDS OR RUBBED HIS ARM WATER PURED OUT OF HIS SKIN. THE WHITES OF HIS EYES FILLED WITH WATER.IT DISTOURTED HIS ENTIRE BODY. THE TIME HAD COME TO SAY GOOD-BYE.
JULY 1.2006 HIS WISH CAME TO LIGHT. MY TWIN BROTHER WAS PRONOUNCED DEAD. I DONATED WHATEVER ORGAN COULD BE SAVED TOHELP SAVE THE LIFE OF SOMEONE THAT WANTED TO LIVE SOMEONE THAT WAS FIGHTING TO LIVE. MY TWIN LEFT BEHIND A 16YR AND A 3 YR OLD. NOT TO MENTION ME.
HIS SUFFERING NOW BECAME MY SUFFERING . FOR 19 MONTHS I HAVE SUFFERED SEVERELY. I ATE ,MYSELF SILLY GAINED MORE WEIGHT THAT I COULD HAVE IMAGINED. IM ON DEPRESSION PILLS, HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE PILLS, AND HAD A HEART ATTACK 9 MONTHS AGO..NOW TELL ME HE IS FREE OF PAIN AND MY HAD JUST BEGUN. I DIDN'T WANT TO DIE. I HAVE 5 KIDS.. I DIDN'T ASK FOR THIS NOR IS IT FAIR THAT I HAVE TO SLOWLY DIE THIS WAY. PART OF ME DIED 07-01-06 BUT THE REST OF ME IS FAILING SLOWLY EACH DAY.
SO YOU ALL REALLY NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE ALSO KILLING OTHERS WHEN YOU TRY SUICIDE.. GO TO WWW.BILLSTROZEWSKI.COM OR TYPE IN BILL STROZEWSKI AND WITNESS THE SUFFERING OTHERS DEAL WITH WHEN U SUCCEED HOPE IT CHANGES YOUR MIND.
|11 Feb 2008||George greece||Hi again guys. This is the second time I am writting here. My last time was at november 2006. Remember myself reading for hours these posts to find comfort on them. My problem was a lot more lighter than others. Anyway, here I am now, enjoying life...|
|01 Feb 2008||I have a heart diesese, I know I will die eventually thanks to it... :(
I tried suicide... I failed at doing that...
Why I am here?
... Guys ...
... I realized in the months outside of the world, that a crush I had was the only thing I had left...
One day she called me... Curious, she was the only one there...
... Everyday I fell the pain, the lack of energy and my heart going crazy.
Being dizzy, hardly able to stand up...
I found love.
I live for her, and when she dumps me...
I will hug her and thanks her, I will let her go, I owe her so much...
But... Guys... Will I suicide then?
Damnit... Life is so great...
Don't take it away... you have the chance...
... You think your pain will go away?
There is no god, there is no hell.
We only have now.
So give yourself a chance.
PLEASE... someone will see it... that real you...
Love is stupid and it's great.
Find a crush, Find a dream...
Live for it, and then live for staying close to it.
When all it's lots don't give up hope!
|30 Jan 2008||MH Loves You||I met my best friend on this site almost a year ago to only recieve an email today while waiting for my class to start that said my best friend is dead!! im pretty sure it was not suicide but am waiting to hear from another friend to find out more info. we worked through her issues and i shared lots of my personal life with her. i helped her with many things. i do know that even if it was a suicide that she will be better off and that a piece of my life, heart and soul goes with her as she enters into a peaceful rest! RIP Hellen and may god be with you! Thank you for giving me your friendship and am so happy I was able to give you mine! People please understand and realize that death is permanent and that if you need help there is always someone waiting to listen and/or help you! Need to talk talk email please!|
|22 Jan 2008||Jen||I was suicidal at 13 - it was a horrid time. I am now 36 - three 13 year lifetimes have almost passed, and I am BLISSFULLY HAPPY with myself and my life. Life is very hard but we must be patient. The deeper our capacity and understanding of pain the deeper our capacity and undrstanding of joy. You can't even begin to imagine how amazing you will become and how much you can actually love yourself.|
|19 Jan 2008||Phillip||Well from what experience ive had its unclear whats the best way. When I was 13 I went through alot of shit with a girl who I loved (foolishly of course) and she lay ruin to my life, when I brought myself to it I tried slashing my wrists but stopped before I even bled. When I think about it I wish that maybe I had killed myself then, although I know now that wrists slashing has a 5% success rate... -_-
Ever since then I went very dark, everything was depressing, I did things intentialy which brought pain and suffering to myself. I became very paranoid where small things were suddenly attempts at making me sad and the thing is when your paranoid these things seem so realistic.
I become much more emo/goth but it was all because of my emotions. After an incident at my school where I was bullied very badly alongside a friend I hated myself and had to get rid of the emotional pain, and the best way I found was through inflicting physical pain. Many people including my parents have asked me since I first started self-inflicting (after my suicide attempt, im 15 now) where I get some of my poorly covered injuries from and I manage to hide the truth although I suspect people back-chat me and reckon I do.
I thought I was alone for a long time and life seemed very down, as I didnt know what to do or what I was going to do or could do. Things seemed to brighten after I met a girl a few weeks back, who was my first girlfriend for 2 years, she was sado-masochistic and I found that I was too, although she dumped me 2 weeks in.
Since then I find even the most un-sexual pain stimulating, its gotten to the point where I dont know if im burning myself through depression or sexual release. I thought for sure that I was mentaly unstable and that I was so different from everyone. Then I met another girl, whom due to my "raging" hormones I become very strongley attracted to her.
When I told her she was very sorry because she didnt like me but she talked to me about stuff, and I found out that she too had tried commiting suiced on many occasions, and self-inflicted. Were friends now (not good friends because she avoids me so im not hurt so much cause I still like her) and I feel like there is some hope. Her life was pretty fucked up so she tried overdosing. It feels good to be able to tell someone how you feel and they've been through it all aswell. I realy love her and im so worried that she will kill herself.
So realy, if your going to kill yourself, make sure you succeed because if you dont, its hard to hide the scars, both physical and emotional.