Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.

Date Name/email

What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?

Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
19 Apr 2003 Lucy Cortina Life as a teenage SSSS spy agent is sure tough work. Maintaining ones breasts in itself is a big (boob) job. As I was getting ready for my latest mission, my tiny tot sister ran into my room laughing "Lalalalala I'm a Minogue!!" She had been listening to Kylie, of course.
She then begged me to take her "out dancing". I said no, I'm busy. She then said she wanted to come on my mission with me. Just as I was lifting my heavy-weight new rubber strengthened bra, she yanked it from my hands, the little mite, and ran off with it. So I pursued, my boobs shaking and wobbling side to side all through the house. I expect the neighbours got a nice surprise seeing my bosoms bobbling about like that. They probably think my parents run a part-time nudist camp as well as Breast HQ. My sister ran into the bathroom, and held the bra dangerously over the toilet pan.
"Me come", she said. I had no time to negotiate so.... I lied.
"Look sissy, Mr Piggles is going for a fly in the garden!"
"Where? Me see, me see!!!" she screamed. She dropped the bra, which thankfully landed with a sharp thud on the bathroom floor.
I grabbed it and ran off to my room, where thankfully my Danny had parked the new SSSS Cortina Mobile a few minutes earlier.
My sister thinks Mr Piggles is our neighbour. Sadly, the only truth to that is our neighbours hidous facial features.
Do expect my sister to enter this website by the age of 13. I don't think it will even take that long before she wants to discuss suicide. Just look at what hell members of the Cortina family are put through...
19 Apr 2003 dDan Have sex with five whores a day. In two weeks you'll have every single konwn STD and might have even developed some undiscovered ones! :-O Now you'll die happy AND you'll have a disease named after you.
19 Apr 2003 cat killer mincing yourself to death
19 Apr 2003 Toine jump from a big building and fly the longest you can
18 Apr 2003 The otherside Im here to WARN you !

18 Apr 2003 Monster Mash Well fuck Me !
What a site !
Truth, most do not want to kill themselves, just want to threaten others and even themself, some go thru with it and Id say its usually an oops when they accomplish it !
Keep expressing yerself, get louder about it, tell people even though they do not want to hear it, fuckem, tell'em anyway !
Thats yelling fer help, I did it, when I was 13, Im now 37, so I guess it some how worked, hang on to yer ass, learn shit, killing yerself shit may never leave your mind but the seriousness of the thought will, your mind is a fucked up place to live, its where all evil begins !
Point is loosen up on how serious you take your own thoughts, keep talking to people, write the shit down, read some info on it, dig thru web sites, go to the book store, you may actuslly find a bit of humor in it all, you may find your a bit more powerful than your comittee up stairs (yer mind and the shit you think ) believe it or not most people have sick weird shit in there head as you might, some know how to ignore and deal with it, some have done shit in there child hood that burns in there mind and feel condemd to there mind, and listen/believe how they are screwed and there is know one one to discuss this with and they are simply fucked, doomed, well these like myself are the ones that need to work abit at it and really its not work at all, its simply learning or discovering, opening that fucking contraption up for possibly finding some info that could make some sense out of what it is I have been through or going through and why I feel like I want to die !
What the hell do you got to loose other than possibly yer damn life.
Thats what I did, and Im still here, life certainly has its very sucky moments and at times I wonder what the hell ! However I get thru it, I learn things to do to get thru it, sometimes I just sleep, may even get drunk or rent a movie, I do keep reading up on stuff that makes sense to me, that gives me help an upper edge on this commitee in my mind, fuck them Im in charge, not them !
Sounds nuts but hey do some reading and you may find its no so unusual!
18 Apr 2003 Ling Death brings no solutions but only sorrows and hurt to people who loves you. It only shows your selfishness and ignorance. Never make a decision when you are at the lowest of your life. It is always rash and makes you regret. Step back from your life and look as a bystander. Are all the problems bothering you really that big a problem? studies? relationship problems? confidence? family? Before you chose death, give yourself time do one thing you always wanted to do and never have the guts or chance to do it. After all you are going to die, nothing should stop you. When all hopes left you, you have no expectations, no fears, no disappointment, no pain, no hurt, no tears.
17 Apr 2003 Felicia The Hollow Chocolate Bunny

There’s the chocolate bunny,
sitting on the shelf,
looking oh so yummy,
I laugh in spite myself.

The box is oh so yellow,
wrapped in cellophane.
With lips curled up to eat them,
I felt a hunger pain.

Diet, oh forget it!
I wallow in my shame,
I stare at my protruding mass,
I think that I am game.

Monkeys eat bananas.
Horses eat just hay.
Humans eat just anything,
and find there’s hell to pay.

Screw the resolution,
I’ll exercise tomorrow,
My calorie intake,
Ole Billy’s bike I’ll borrow.

Lucy and her boobies,
The boys stare as we state,
I’ll think I’ll cook some chicken
and just use "Shake and Bake".

Forget about the chocolate.
My willpower's just bad.
I ate the chocolate bunny,
It’s the best I ever had.

Happy Easter all you folks,
Boil eggs, have fun,
Color them real carefully,
And dry them when they’re done.

The End

Don’t forget to indulge on that chocolate hollow bunny, and promise me you’ll eat the ears first.
...Because that’s the best part.

To all my friends at who celebrate or don't celebrate Easter.
The ones who don't...
think of all the candy.
17 Apr 2003 Lucy Cortina Yeah I have been offered this website. Appealing to my greed of this site is something Mouchette knows will work :)
Alas, I am too busy with mundane activities like living and powdering my breasts to bother running a site like this. And my SSSS missions do take up a lot of time, it is by no means easy tracking down Britney's breasts. I know I know, they ARE big, but at the time my fat neighbour had stood up and his huge ass had covered the moon.
Just wait. I'll save Britney's career. yes, we have produced the world's first voice implants! Britney is going to be able to sing pretty soon, so grab those earmuffs....
17 Apr 2003 Chris I know you want to kill yourself but I also know that you feel relieved and satisfied when you hear about other people dying. I just wrote this story especially for you. Read on if you've got the guts. Here's...

The Three Little Piggies

The Wilsons needed to go out
So they left Andrea about
She had to look after two boys
She had to put away their toys
If she got hungry she could eat
She could have anything indeed

They would be back by half past one
And she would do all to be done,
She played with the boys (and put away their toys)
She gave them to eat (and left everything neat)
She put them to sleep (and they slept very deep)
She then was relaxed (and could do what she pleased)

Stepping out of her red shoes
She went in the kitchen to have some booze
There was wine, brandy, vodka and beer
And then there was whisky, so bright and so clear
She chose Jack Daniels, you know it's the best
But then she mixed it with some of the rest

She sat relaxed by the warmth of the fire
Sipping her drink with no other desire
She began feeling tired and was thinking of bed
But then there was ringing around in her head
't was the telephone, so noisy, so damned
As she picked it up, the other end slammed

It was a wrong number, like she wished it would be
For she didn't want to talk, not to you, nor to me
But then sleep had gone, she switched on the T.V
Where there was sound,life and a sweet melody
Things became cheery, but then became eery
For the phone rang again and again and again!

Hello. This is Five-seven-four-double two...
Can you please tell me who the fuck are you?
An insane laugh came came down the phone
It chilled every nerve and chilled every bone
"There were three little piggies, Oh what fun!
Two were disembowelled, then there was one!"

"Go to hell!", Andrea screamed
The other voice laughed, the other voice beamed
She began feeling nervous, said she needed a smoke
She believed it will help you in avoiding a stroke
Something good, something great, perfect and smooth
Marlborlo, nicotine, cover your lungs in sooth

The phone rang again, Andrea felt mad
She felt very sick and she felt very bad
When she picked up the phone there was the gruff voice
He told her "I'll get you, you just have no choice!"
She slammed down the phone and started to yell
"Why doesn't this pervert go somewhere in hell?"

She picked up the phone, dialled the operator
"Can you please trace a call of a damned perpetrator?
My number is five-seven-four-double two five
And I wish that this pervert just wasn't alive!"
"I am concerned" Mrs.Operator was saying
"But you're paid to work, not concerning or praying!"

Andrea sat back, feeling calm and relieved
Buit she soon got to know that she was deceived
The phone rang and rang; the gruff voice again
He wished her bad luck, he wished her some pain
"There was one little piggy, oh what fun!
Her throat was slit, then there was none!"

Lighting up a cigarette, Andrea paced the room
She was watching the phone, she was waiting for doom
Finally it rang, but it was Mrs.Operator
She wanted to ask a question as an investigator
"Do you have another phone in the house where you are staying?"
"Why, yes, there's one with the boys, but what the fuck are you saying?"

Mrs.Operator talked in a frightened tone
"Whoever has been calling has been using that phone
Run out of the house, there's not much you can do
It can be a joke, it can be very true!"
Half stumbling and half running, she went on the way out
Opening the kitchen door, she gave a real, big shout

The sight which met her bulging eyes
Sent her vomiting in surprise
A huge man looking grotesque
Was nothing but very picturesque
Like wading through a flood
Of very red, hot blood

He was spluttered and stained with a blood spattered chopper in one hand...
Something steamy, hot and with a sticky smell in the other hand...
On the top of the stairs, the boys (or what was left of them)...
They had been disembowelled and their insides completely cleaned out...
Slowly the man moved towards Andrea, leaving behind a trail of blood...

What a pervert I am for writing this, and what perverts you are for reading it, but wait- Isn't this exactly what American and British soldiers are doing to little Iraqi childrens. Imagine it the other way. A small Iraqi child disembowelling Bush & Blair and then slitting Saddam Hussein's throat (those three little piggies-you know that everything they do is out of greed). Oh, what days of glory I dream about...

See ya!
17 Apr 2003 Suicide?_Hell_ill_Kill_ya I have just one final comment i care not for the opinions the of the lamen and the weilders of your common serenity to forge on to make no mistakes convince yourself of such things to make your mind REAL (good boy) your last choices pain, suffering, death... you may ask yourself what will i accomplish bye killing myself...?
Well let me ask you: what are you really accomplishing by keeping your self alive?(click) bullets...
17 Apr 2003 Ashley Garner jump out in front of a speeding eighteen-wheeler
17 Apr 2003 dave if it possible 2 overdose on tylonal? i tried and it didnt work
17 Apr 2003 Hell_ill_kill_ya Jus stab yourself repeatedly in the face with a saudering iron
(dibs on the spinal fluid
17 Apr 2003 Suicide_Hell_ill_kill_ya Id just like to say how funny i think it is that so many people write in just to tell you how much they hate you and how sick they think you are(if not only for the purpose to make there own voice heard)id just like to ask one question what ever made them go onto a search engine and look for a site such as this.
I find such petty insults and remarks to be a complete waste of time that they could have been using trying to make the world a better place(yeah right) so in conclusion
this is an excellent and hilarious site
keep up the good work pal
16 Apr 2003 john jump off a bridge with a thin wire around your neck attached fifty feet up to the bridge. Can you say "Slice"
16 Apr 2003 adree voila ce que j'ai retenu :
-reperer une voie de chemin de fer ou le train ne passe pas trop souvent : ainsi vous aurez le temps de prendre (trop) de somniferes et de vous endormir sur les rails
-commettre un crime dans l'Oklahoma (ou un des 30 etats des usa ou on pouras vous soulager)
-insulter un chasseur
-overdose de drogue dure (classique mais son avantage : facilement realisable)
16 Apr 2003 ILLaToMiC (Preachin' da WERD) WORDS, So fukin many WORDS, FUCK WORDS! Fuck all the WORDS on this site, Fuck all these WORDS I type! WORDS are cheap thaz why there so miserbly plentifull, WORDS aint shit! ACTION iz Benificial so Stop reading and kill yo self Bitch! Say WERD...
16 Apr 2003 ILLaToMiC Jump off a really high building, I'd suggest at least 6 storys and not much higher because U want it to be quick.
16 Apr 2003 Monique did anyone else recieve an email saying that mouchette wanted to give up the website to them?????
i'm a little confused, someone help me out here :s

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