Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.

Date Name/email

What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?

Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
05 Aug 2003 Lucy Cortina Wow Mouchette, 2 holidays. Who is paying for the babe-filled trips to Barbados? I expect you have a day-job as a pornstar or something.
Meanwhile, for Lucy, it was one of those nights.
I had invited my bezzie mate Felicia over for a girly evening, so she hoisted her hefty new bosoms over to my place. It was a bit of a a squeeze getting her through the door, but we managed.
We had the Doritos out and Pachamama wine. In approx 40 minutes time we would be as trollied as skunks and doing dares involving root vegetables.
"Look at my new bag!!!" trilled Felicia. I stared at it. It was sort of pink and frilly, with a leather strap.
"What about it?" I said, which was when Felicia grabbed my head and shoved my nose right into the bag. After regaining my composure, I stared at the bag for a long time, as I knew that you have to let Felicia have her way or she gets a bit ratty and can steal your underwear.
So I kept staring at the pink bag.
It looked like a lesbian overnight bag.

Uh oh, I had thought too soon. At that moment, Felicia said "I love you Lucy!!! I love you!" and tried to kiss me.
I managed to fend her off with a french baguette in the end (french men make very nice baguettes, as Mouchette should well know).
Once she was out of my front door, she started making a fuss out in the street, but people probably dismissed her as a drunk coming home from a heavy night at the corner pub. She kept yelling and yelling in the street, asking me to look outside or open a window for her.

But nothing in the world would make me open my glistening curtains to her.

The moral? Lucy doesn't do lesbianism.
05 Aug 2003 Lezard Valeth I'm 17 and I hate my life, I have depression since I was 5, I never had friends and people only aproched from me when they wanted to tease me or wanted a favor or something from me, even my family hates me, I never had a girlfriend, never kissed anyone, no one never cared about me, my whole life is a failure, i feel down all the time and i'm always thinking on suicide but I'm such a coward that I'm a failure in even that, I just wished to know why god hates me so much, if anyone knows a fast, and painless way to suicide tell me cause I'm starting to get enough courage to end my pityful life...
05 Aug 2003 the gay punk omgod. another one of those fucked up things. this time, it's mouchette. what's up girl? (oh my god am i turning into rupaul, not that there's anything wrong..) vacation, boyfriend, those fucking evangelist bastards that won't let us die so that more people in africa get food that we are supposed to eat. i hate evangelists. they bug the shit of of me and yes, dear will.

anyways last friday there were no plans, no parties (not that i'm in the mood or right mind to go) ana nicloe was on. that bitch i want her to die.

so yeah three whole weeks eh. so yeah here's what i did. i went to the first suicide advice page that you have since 1997. and the first one said: "devenir un adulte". i don't know what that means.

uggh there are kids outside the fucking building that like shouting "rain rain, go aya..." and they are so annoying. i'll shoot them. and yeah some bitch left her baby here, the baby crying and all... poor kid!

?bye? i advise all of those kids who don't deserve to die, half of everyone who writes here to not kill themselves, but i might be three weeks late.
05 Aug 2003 Mike Dewfort First take a large knife or sword, then wack off about 10 people in a busy place and before the cops can reach you either blow ur brains out if u packed a gun, or slit ur wrists. Enjoy.
05 Aug 2003 iza somebody please help
hi. i went outside a few minutes ago, i was wandering down the street and thought about a suicide. it seems like the only way out. but then i remembered, that today is my mother's birthday and it would be nasty to kill yourself on your mum's birthday, right?
but i'm so much tired of this motherfucking life. right now i just really want to die. there is absolutely nothing in this world that i could live for. i wish someone would just kill me. o god what the hell did i do to you???? why do you have to hate me so much?

for somebody in slovenia:
crt tole je zate:
ce bos enkrat dozivu to kar sm jst s tabo, me bos razumu. ce ne, me verjetn ne bos. tist obdobje,k sm bla s tabo je bil nedvomno najbl hepi obdobje mojga lajfa-ce ne celo edin. brez tebe nimam nc! vse stvari so nepomembe in mi ga cist zvisijo, tko kt jst teb. zelim si, d bi me meu tok rd kokr mam jst tebe, pa me nimas.jst pa tud nobenga druzga nm mogla met vec tok rada. kva nej pol se delam? zajebala sm k sm sploh kdaj bla s tabo,k od takrt naprej je vse drugac.k si mi dal sreco pa upanje pa vse, pol si mi pa vzel to nazaj in zdej je se huj!!!lubm te.ampak sam se potihem in sam se jst to vem...
everything is fake. enjoy people!
05 Aug 2003   Go fuck yourselves. You don't know anything about the world. You're just brat kids who are looking for attention. Go home to mommy you fucks.
05 Aug 2003 Sonora Why talking about suicide? Life is cool. It's awesome. I am very lucky to be living. My whole family died because of Pol Pot, the Khmer dictator, and somehow I got to live and come to America. I got another chance. I am very lucky and happy. So life should be a blessing, not a curse. Its only a curse if you treat it like one.
04 Aug 2003 Chris So I hear that you are on holiday dear Mouchette. That's wonderful and I want to congratulate you about it! I know that life remains suicidal but at least you can escape from the boring day to day suicidal stuff and maybe relax and forget a little...

When did we in Western Europe become such wimpy scaredy cats? Every time I open a newspaper or switch on the TV I am confronted by images of deserted departure lounges at most airports and miles of empty beaches in all of our favourite holiday haunts. I can't say that these are not things that I have not wished for in the past, but not for the reason that people are terrified of going away since September 11th 2001. We should be ashamed of ourselves (this does not go for you people who would gladly go on a plane and let it crash into some building killing you and thousands of others!), especially when we consider what past generations endured to secure the freedom to come and go as we please. Personally I refuse to be terrorised out of my holidays and if anything I want to travel more than ever before. In fact I never really harboured any deep yearning to visit the USA but I would jet off to New York City without any hesitation (given the cash and the opportunity of course) even though they have just banned smoking throughout the whole city! Come on, ask yourself this question: Where would we all be now if sixty years ago everyone decided that the world was just too scary and decided to stay in the cellar for five years? Probably we would have ended up with no computers and no Mouchette (God forbid!) If you get the chance to take a look at a newspaper from between 1939 and 1945, you will be amazed at how much 'normal' activity was going while the whole world was at war-movies, dances, prize days, garden parties and yes, even holidays were all still part of people's lives, so why should a few fanatics be allowed to make us all cower at home now, more than half a century later?

Sadly the media plays the greatest role in instilling so much fear. We now get to see everything live in our living rooms, but only what the broadcasters choose to show us. For instance SARS. Yes, I know a new disease should be a worry but try to get it into some sort of perspective. This is something that has killed a few hundred people world-wide, which doesn't really qualify it as the plague, but if you believe what you read and see on TV, then you would be forgiven for thinking that the end is nigh. The fact that people are terrified of it is entirely due to the fact that someone has decided that we should be. Compare the SARS outbreak with the fact that 3,000 children die in Africa every day from malaria, something that we do have a cure for but not the will to do anything about, and all governments should commit suicide or be killed for not doing anything (take note Mr.Bush, Blair, Chirac, etc), and you should get some idea of how scared you should really be! The sad fact is that the mortality of African kids doesn't make such dramatic TV pictures as people going to work in surgical masks. Let's take reasonable precautions by all means, but don't let terrorists and TV rob us of our feedom and sense of adventure!

So congratulations again Mouchette for having the guts to go on holiday! And for the rest, just go for it! Being on this site means that you are all suicidal, so go on holiday to forget your troubles at least for a short time and you never know, luckily a terrorist might board the plane killing you and a lot of others (if the terrorist isn't yourself after all!)...

See ya on a plane, hopefully with mask on face and gun in hand...
03 Aug 2003 Valerie unprotected sex
03 Aug 2003 will No messages til 27th:( hope im still here. im soooo depressed, i wanna die. i will try and be good gay punk. im 40 by the way. pretty ancient, but not as ancient as Mick Jagger. gee he is ugly. poor sod. their music ie Rolling Stones is rather naff. i could write something better myself on my music software. byeeeeee
02 Aug 2003 Socialistic, moralistic, non-imperalistic friend Move to Sweden you all.
Here are almost no biggots, racists, homophobes or such. Instead the majority are nice people who respect each other. Come here and you won't feel alone anymore. It's called Socialism (no not Communism for all you parents who read this). For all I know USA is just one big imperalistic race track where the good guys finish last and the successful, good looking, smart, rich, inventive etc. get everything they want.
Although Sweden is a small country, we are ranked #4 on the world's best countries to live in, presented by the UN. Our neighbor Norway ranks #1, the UK #15 and US #6. It's strange. When I visited New York 2000 I saw people begging in the streets. Uhm, people had to beg in the streets in order to live? Where the hell was I... Hell?
A man tossed a coin in the face of a beggar - who was black by the way. As I picked up the coin and put it in the poor mans hand, he looked me in the eyes and said: "thanks brother".
Yeah, I know, I'm being a stupid moralist, but listen: No man nor woman in Sweden has to beg for cash on some lousy street where people pass by, not caring whether the person lives or dies. The reason for this is not that everyone in Sweden is born rich. Instead high taxes (highest in the world) are used in order to give every citizen a decent life. Among many things we have public health care, just like Canada.
So people live on contributions in your country you say? What a bunch of lazy slobs, what have they ever made for your country? This is where tolerance enters the picture. It's not easy to stick to, since you have to make sacrifices yourself, but it's humane.
There are those in Sweden who wish a more capitalistic state. They can present many good arguments about why we need to remove the public (gov.) sector and make room for the private sector. Arguments that leave room for GREAT economics (for some people), but no mercy for the ones who are retarded, lazy, poor, lazy, poor, lazy, stupid, retarded, homo, on the edge of society, poor or suicidal for that matter. They say everyone will gain profit from a privatized community. Is that so? Well, compared to Communism, in which everyone has to live on the same low level it sure is great... for some people.
How about a land where everything is equally good for everyone? A land without prejudices? Nah, that won't happen in a long time. But I feel we're well on the way here though.
From the middle of the 19th century to the beginning of the early 20th, Swedes immigrated to America seeking better lives for themselves.
Now I say: immigrate back to Sweden! Or even better: fight for justice and equal rights where you live. It's your call.

Best wishes/

Me, a guy who your parents doubtlessly will call a red f****** commie scum and condemn to burn forever in Hell.$file/join_english.pdf
02 Aug 2003 Joe If you're a girl,
go to a biker bar and ask some scary looking dudes if they could be your daddy and make you feel really good.

-Let me know how it turns out.
Good Luck
02 Aug 2003 Mouchette This page won't be updated before the 27th of August. Meanwhile, I'm keeping all your messages and will publish them after that date.
02 Aug 2003 doesn't matter your ways are shit, if i'm not here tomorrow mine are better. i thought i'd at least have something interesting to say but no my life was that crap, nothing to say & no one to say it to, bye.
01 Aug 2003 the gay punk omgod. just a girl is still here!!! yay. um i don't know what to say and why i am only reacting at this instant.

i'll explain. i'm very pissed at this moment, contrary to the gay tradition of busking out i the sun because it's duh, summer. i have no money and dad only gives me money in the school year (yes i am that young). so i have no money, but no job at this time either, therefore depression, watching tv, eating what mom cooked, and so on.

omgod the people who are supposed to be dead by now, aka the fucking rolling stones, had a concert with 450,000 people in attendance. first of all i can't believe that they're still alive considering the amount of dope and children they have done/made in their lifetime. second of all their music is shit. third of all it makes me sad that 450,000 people, most of them under 30, would pay 20 fricking dollars to see who could have been my grandpa. (note, imagine how miserable your life is if you are mick jagger daughter)

anyways, just a girl is still alive, (yeah what are you doing lately? second question, who are you doing lately?) and will meanwhile, honey please don't, okay. you are not ugly. gay men can never be ugly. i fucked 55 year old men who suprisingly i mistake for a paul walker lookalike (just with the white hair). and they're hotter than their twenty something counterparts who i can shoot one of these days.

and besides PC (i don't hate you) is prolly dead
that gay guy i told not to kill himself is prolly dead
don't be the third one.
coz i know i have to follow all of you
01 Aug 2003 samantha i have tried several times. my next way is to just to shoot myself in the head. i am in such pain all the time. nothing has went right in my life so why not end it
01 Aug 2003 The Supreme Possiblity of Das Sein You just have to know that your mother tried to abort you 13 years before. (It works)
31 Jul 2003 Joshua I hate my life. Ive been suffering from depression ever since i was about 6-7. Im 18 and have never felt as worse as i am right now. I constantly think about killing myself, the only reason i can think of, why im still here is because of my mum. I don’t know what she would do if she knew I killed myself.
Im 18 and i have never had a girlfriend or a job. All my friends are moving up and on, and i am going no where. I am an ugly pathetic loser. I dont know what to do. THis is not a message for you to sympathies to, i guess im just asking for help…
My life is shit and i have no reason to believe that it will ever get any better. Why cant i just die accidentally or something, then it wouldn’t be my fault.
31 Jul 2003 Guertrude Find someone else who is 13 laying somewhere dead that looks sooo much like you and fake your death and be reborn! hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!
31 Jul 2003 will i think perhaps i will gas myself, but i wont tell anyone im gonna do it. ultimate suprise!!! i shall enjoy doing it :) bye bye

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