|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|23 Sep 2003||jean||la mejor manera hermano, no la tiene nadie.|
|21 Sep 2003||will||well LEANNE, id willingly buy a gun off you. i would have pleasure in pulling that trigger. and yeah, the walls would be splattered with blood and fragments of my brain. cool eh! dont judge others!!!|
|21 Sep 2003||Steve||I like to sit in my room all day and listen to Nine Inch Nails. There's nothing better for my depressed, suicidal mind.|
|20 Sep 2003||damon||Male: cut off your sexual organ and swallow it making sure not to chew.
Female: take a tampon and tie the string to your tongue, swallow, and drink some water
|20 Sep 2003||Steve||I don't have a life. And soon that may be true in a literal sense as well.|
|20 Sep 2003||leanne to steven||Oh,Steven,we can be losers together. i'm a minority in every place i go, even at times when i may not look like one, i sure feel like one inside. when i walk the streets (a rare thing) and i see people smiling... it makes me sad, i want to smile, so sometimes i fake one, but it hurts,it fades, so i dont bother. im starting college on monday, im dreading it... enrolement day was dissapointing... i was surrounded by sheep... people who dress the same, act the same, walk&talk the same. these were exactly the kinda assholes i was hoping to escape from at high-school which was the whole point of leaving, but it seems the 'clone syndrome' is spreading more rapidly than i thought. i think what this place needs is a little less of the normal, acceptable & ordinary and more people like us. we need to spice things up a little with more nut-cases ,loonatics, freaks, mental-head-cases. i'd feel more at home then. im a goth/grunge girl myself, everyone stares and my family ask why i dress in black, well its coz i feel like im in darkness 24/7. its like everybody else radiates with health, their colourful inner-selves shines on the outside and im like the background of a painting... or a dull shadow or a grim wall. im noticed and i stand out but i feel invisible and get ignored. im like the side dish at the restaurant that nobody orders so it just gets pushed to the corner of the table, or it gets sent away.
i was doing a bit of thinking one sleepless night, and i thought.... hmmm, if we get 100 depressed suicidals and give them a gun, i wonder how many would actually pull the trigger? i admit i'd hesitate. i wanna die so much but still i find myslef hanging around for something.. i dunno... maybe waiting for my package of happiness to be delivered, but still it hasn't arrived. i dont think it will, so why am i still lurking around? i feel pathetic most of the time saying to myself, 'oh just stop wallowing in self pity for fuck sake, accept that life equals loss, stop embracing and indulging in all your flaws and imperfections!'' why isnt it that easy? i wish it were. i wish i could take my brilliant mate's advice and 'lighten up' 'smile' or 'cheer up.'
this is coming from a 17 year old who first attempted to retreat on a permanent vaccation at the age of 13... im crap at this suicide thing... useless at living and hopeless at dying. is there anything i'll ever get right?!
|20 Sep 2003||Steve||Bye, will. I think I must die soon as well.
|20 Sep 2003||jane 0388||I need help i dont no what to do anymor. whenever ig out i ither get terrorised, get started on or people ask me for money. im having boy troubles to. i no all girls get depressed about boys but i really cant put up with it. if you were me you would fee like shit. my mum and dad hate me, my mum locks me in my room my dad gets violent and so does my boyfriend sooner or later i wont need to kill myself, sum1 will do it for me. the other night i ran out infront of a car it stopped to early i want a painful death, my skin splitting apart, my body gettin run over or sum1 stabbing me. anything to get me out of here so i can feel myself gettin hurt, punished slowly for the shity person that i am.|
|20 Sep 2003||ronwelthy||hey steve what a good philosophy. Thinking everything is planned and that because you think about something worse it will always happened. It's like what I think there are the happy people who can make choices and the other who always end doing things they don't want to or things they are obliged to do because there are no more solutions.
Well that's a good idea but please Steve tell me what exactly Tylenol is because it could be useful in my case too
|20 Sep 2003||Phil||Why am I still here Steve? Well, why is anyone still here, posting on the suicide kit?
I have my reasons for being alive still, and they are nothing to do with this website at all. I do have a life, even if it's not much of one. I have been suicidal for a while and soon, let's just say soon, I may be dead. I think it's ok for me to post here still in my days before my demise. Lucy Cortina is dead, at least in name. I have to go now cos Beyonce is on the TV, shaking her...um....
Yes Steve, I'm gay, but have some strange obsession with breasts. I don't actually understand the point of them - they're so soft and gooshy and just lie there, doing nothing.
And yes gay punk, I may have been posting as someone before, lets just say. My boyfriend has changed his name now though, so don't worry about that ;)
And Naomi, we do care, more than you could imagine.
|20 Sep 2003||Steve||Wow, I was just having some intense thought and reflecting on things and for the first time I actually accepted the fact that "I have to commit suicide". Deep down I'm reluctant and I'd prefer not to die of my own doing. However, it's becoming more clear that perhaps there's no way for me to appreciate life in its current form... and my urge to commit suicide seems to have a mind of its own. I can try to stop it, but it keeps on coming.
Still, I don't know when or if I'll end up doing it. Tomorrow? Next month? Three years from now? It's not something I can predict, but from experience, whenever my mind becomes set on something serious, I usually end up doing it soon after and with little preparation, so I'm prepared to go at any time. I don't know what the afterlife will be like..... assuming there even is one, but I sure hope it wouldn't be something I'd be made to regret entering. As for my prospective weapon, I think I'll use various pills, mainly Tylenol #3's with a strong alcoholic beverage.... if that'll even work.
I should still be around for a while at least (well, possibly)... but I'm afraid my fate may be sealed. I hope not, but it's not something I can control.
|20 Sep 2003||Steve||Ugh, I hate my fucking worthless life now more than ever. All I can count on everyday is more pain and the seething anger and depression that results from it. I've become morbidly obsessed with death, especially that of myself. This has to end soon, somehow.
Sometimes I'm even in disbelief at how low I've sunk, but it's beyond my control. Whenever I see happy people whom I perceive as having it better than me, I simply desire to hurt them. I want them to feel pain like I've felt for so long and continue to feel everyday to no end. I know at least one way to make it end though, and it's a prospect that seems to be growing stronger everyday.
|20 Sep 2003||will||ummm, im now at that point in my life, where i cant go on anymore. i just cant go on for anyone. im just sick of my existence. i have felt that desperate, i was willing to try anything. so i wont be here soon, and i will be finally at peace. arrgghh fuck, a ruddy great big spider ran across the curtain.|
|19 Sep 2003||the gay punk||hey, phil, are you PC me, coz the guy's name is phil too and he's gay (soooorry for being dumb).|
|19 Sep 2003||Felicia||True useful facts:
1.) The majority of the world uses and abuses some type of drug. The number one drug in this world that is used most is caffeine. Not to forget, its legal.
2.) Suicides result from the impact of heartbreak and grief. Some people believe that it is all in ones head. No its not! Suicide is caused by the result of unexplained circumstances beyond somebodys control. It can be chemically and mentally induced. The best prevention against suicide is to communicate.
3.) In the world today, most crimes are caused by misunderstandings that often involve conflict of religions or strong beliefs.
4.) Prejudice is a preconceived idea that leads to hatred. The same goes for discrimination and bigotry.
5.) It confuses me that some religions tolerate some notion of living in peace with one another and later turn around stoning somebody because they were different. This does not portray love and obedience in making things right under their gods eyes. Its manipulation.
6.) Its a fact that what goes around comes around happens constantly. If you have revenge on someone, it comes back threefold. Later down the road you say to yourself that pay back is indeed a bitch and that is not good.
7.) Never manipulate or force anybody to love you. If they chose to leave, it is their will and decision. If you try to manipulate and force anybody into loving you against their will, it can only lead to one outcome and that would be a recipe for disaster, along with a restraining order.
8.) Loneliness can only be resolved by mingling with others, such as going outside to see the world, even if it is your own front or backyard. If you are mad at the world and see an injustice, dont sit there and complain. Do something about it! Just make sure that it is not manifested into violence. Learn when to draw the line.
9.) If something hurts so much to the point that you are pining over it, get out of the situation. It would be like prodding your finger on a rusted nail and doing it ten more times, while you are screaming that it still hurts. Some people mutilate themselves for a living doing this. Bad gets to worst, make it a goal to be a stunt man or stuntwoman. You might as well get paid for it!
...Snuff boy and snuff girls, please leave yourselves out of this. This is a website to prevent suicide, not condone such behavior.
10.) Live like there is no tomorrow because today is the first day of the rest of your life.
|19 Sep 2003||Felicia, The Full Monty||Malicious violence in this world is much too common. Angry people run amok and there is no way to stop them. I believe mouchette.org is for the common folk that want to find out the true meaning of life before ending it. Please, my dear people, ease on my friend "Lucy Cortina". "She's" the best that ever is and did save my life at one time. Folks, whether or not you believe that she is unreal, so be it. Her (or His) infectious humor has made the mouchette.org world laugh even if he or she tries not to be funny.
And "Lucy", no matter how tiring it is to be a true comedian, you are in fact a true original. (MAKE NOTE OF IT!) Don't change and keep those boob and Kylie Minogue jokes intact.
For Billy The Freak, my burly haired man, I want you to bring on the fun like you used to and make the world smile as always. I know who you are, and will keep it a secret between you and me, as far as my breasts are concerned (No kidding, the last time I looked, they were real!)
Anyways, Thanks Lucy for the "Boob implants!"
|19 Sep 2003||Steve||I was curious, so I had to look up the word "pap" after reading your message. Another breast reference, how fitting. Thanks for the response though, if anything there's a slight comfort in knowing I'm not just talking to myself here.
Ok Phil, so was the part about you going off to commit suicide part of the story, because you're still here. I figure I don't have too much longer to go. Well, sometimes I'm not sure if I'll ever commit suicide at all, but my suicidal tendencies swing like a pendulum: I'll think I absolutely have to kill myself and then the urge will disappear for a while, and then it will come back with even more strength, and all the while, the space in between urges is getting less and less lengthy. Some day in the not-so-distant future (could be days, could be months, maybe even years) I'll probably finally become fully set on killing myself and go through with it right then and there. I'm feeling kind of scared and anxious right now, because after weeks of not having any strong urges, I feel as though I'm entering into a really suicidal state again and I may not make it through this time around.
It's unfortunate really. If I were speaking in my position a year ago, I'd have a great self-esteem, high hopes and no suicidal tendencies, but I feel completely different now. I feel as though my existence is a joke and I'm running out of reasons to continue. I'd love to go back to the mindset I had a year ago... perhaps I was ignorant... perhaps things were simply better... but I'm afraid I never can. Something in my mind clicked and ever since then I've been spiraling downward with no control.
|19 Sep 2003||Steven||ALL YOU PEOPLE ACT LIKE SUICIDE IS A JOKE.!!!!!!, I know it's not, getting the courage to walk to the edge of a bridge and leap is hard no matter how hard life gets dieing is the hardest. I'm not thirteen I'm sixteen and i feel that life hurts too much. The only thing that scares me of death is the wondering if god really exists and if so how i will be treated. It's not fair that my life is shitty and the only way out is a sin. It's not fair that in order to fix the few things i hate i must die. Being sixteen and having the life i have is not fair, i know there are probaly umpfteen thousand people who have it worser than I do, but the strain it mentally and physically puts on me is unfair, some may say boo who stop crying but you try being an overweight bastard who nobody loves not even your parents who try to get rid of you or at least keep you out of there hair. And being "seperated" not divorced "never married" one having 10 back surgeries and lives 30 miles away, and the other who bitches about his own life every fucking chance. Everybody in school just a tad cooler than me making me a loser. I have my friends but it seems like they use me every chance they get. I'm just a toy, with no feelings, like I'm someone that can listen to you but when I need help nobody cares. I hate that i'm poor no car, I live 1 hour 30 min. walk from the slightest bit of anyone i know with civilization 2 hour 30min away. I'm sick of living in a shit hole where a new thing breaks down a day. I fucking hate it. Some say be thankful for what you have why be thankful for life when it sucks us or my health i'm sick like every month with a damn cold, once again im 100 pds overweight the only i look halfway decent is i'm muscular so i look like a buff football player with a beer gut. I'm a gothic punk person who everybody but my 10 friends hate... there are 2,700 kids in my school 10 sucks. You make suicide seem like a joke when it seems like the best thing for me yet i can't cause i dont want to burn or not exist for the rest of eternity|
|18 Sep 2003||naomi mikamura||dear "just a girl" and "lucy",
i wanna commit suicide cuz..... welll..... when i was born my dad died of something, and my frustrated mom who couldn't hold things together abandoned me and my brother masami. after that i got drafted into the military in kyoto, japan... now im a bodyguard... i can't tell u who but the motto here is "u protect the host with your life, or we will kill u instead"... to someone who wants to kill themselves, this is like "heaven"... but where i am... it's serious HELL!!! u get raped and ruthlessly beaten up daily... and u can't let anyone who tries to help you out, will get killed... then they'll kill u too! that's why i'm not telling anyone where i am... i don't want anymore people getting killed... besides... u probably dont believe me anyway... no one ever does... that's why im still here... cuz no one cares... so i really wouldn't be surprised if u didn't care... i don't know where my brother is... anyway... that's why i hate this fucked up world... cuz here in kyoto... doing this kinda stuff... ISN'T AGAINST THE LAW!!!!!!
at the tip of the most deadly assault weapons imaginable,
|18 Sep 2003||naomi mikamura's back! unfortunatly...||...i feel... like its been... a long time... since... ANYONE... ever really cared.. .about me...? its like nobody cares... what i have to say...? its like im an invisible nobody... what do i do... nobody to go to...talk to... why is life do this to me... why do people do this to me...? they enjoy tormenting me like this...|