|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|29 Oct 2003||Annette||ugh someone please just tell me something besides jump off a bridge or shoot myself.... cause i obviously won't do that. i already tried ODing so many pills so many times and slitting wrists definitley don't help.... so any suggestions, please they are greatly appreciated :)|
|29 Oct 2003||Annette||im not under 13.... and im not new to this site. of course im starting those stupid thoughts again. i kept thinking that i got over this stupid suicidal bullshit.... but i guess not. if it keeps coming back to haunt me to make me keep trying..... im obviously not over. but i think its a sign probably telling me i should do something already to just end it. i know this sounds stupid but what really is a good and easy acess to kill myself. i already tried the ODing and cutting wrists methods plenty of times so that's not possible.... if anyone can give me some good ideeas besides jumping off a bridge or taking a gun cause i obviously won't do that, it'd be helpful. thank you|
|28 Oct 2003||Felicia||This is a message for Caleb.
Yes, I truly understand why you feel like ending it all, especially under the treachery of cruel people... especially ones that you call family or friends.
As in regards to family, which is the most draining, you feel that you are the black sheep and portrayed as a failure. A misfit of some kind. You feel that your family is always... "Want... want... want... Me... Me... Meeeee!" or "You're good for nothing! You're a failure! I can No longer forgive you for what you did?" Because of this kind of upbringing or environment, you think everybody out there is cruel and selfish as well. Everywhere you go, it seems that people are against you, talking behind your back, calling you names, having bad wishes against you in which you can't progress in this world. I had a friend on this website named Lucy Cortina, who sufferred much so because of this.
I am not influencing you to take any personality subscription drugs here Caleb, and there are times I wish I can go on Zoloft, but I can't stand the side effects. (You know, the type of side effects that they use in commercials after advertising the drug: "Warnings may include sexual dysfunction, migranes... ect... ect..")
Maybe you can try this, because I am using it on myself right now. Has it ever occurred to you that you are more powerful than you think you are? The brain can do so many wonderous things. My suggestion to you Caleb is keep a journal of the things that bother you, write it down, and try to be your own advisor. If you visualize somebody else writing for you for help, offer back advise in how they can overcome it. Do it in your journal. I did. I'm doing it right now.
Caleb, my friend, you are not alone in this crummy world full of selfish bastards and skanks. They will receive their wonderful reward at the end. This place is wreaking of assholes everywhere. But remember that you and I can change it to our liking and not use suicide as the last resort. If someone tells us otherwise and say "Go ahead do it! Kill yourself! It will lead to more justice in this world!" Whether they like it or not, even if we are here or if we are gone, the world turns. And if these people remain toxic to us otherwise and don't change their ways, bad things beyond our control will happen to them. It's called payback kiddo. But don't rely on it as a form of revenge. Never wish harm on anyone as a rule because it will come back threefold. Just let things be. Forgive. Let people be people, because in the long run if you do the things you love, I am advising myself to, the more you will be a success, the happier you will be, and it will attract the people that you mostly like to hang around with.
Hang in there Caleb... You are not alone!!! In this crazy world think of this day of a rebirth of new beginnings.
For today is the first day of the rest of your life.
|28 Oct 2003||whitney poston (sinner)||im 16 but ill tell ya what i would do i would cut my head off with ax and get my friend to put a water house down my trough and cut the water on then take my body out to the woods hang my body upside down from a tree and let all the bloody water drip out|
|28 Oct 2003||elo||regarder pikachu manger sensuellement un baton de reglisse (ça destroy n'importe quel jeune cerveau) ça tue plus vite que son ombre|
|28 Oct 2003||lucie||se taillader avec une petite cuillère et verser du sel dessus ou alors laisser pourrir pour choper la gangrène et mourir lentement dans d'atroces souffrances accompagnées de convulsions spasmodiques (hors jours fériés)|
|27 Oct 2003||Caleb||So why is it always the purest of people who are forced to suffer such tremendous, indescribable pain? Why is it that while the other wretches of society continue to walk the face of the earth, belittling whom they please and crushing whatever they desire while we are forced to receive all negative repercussions. Yet they are the ones permitted to continue living in bliss, living in the ecstasy derived from the pain of others. As I read the posts here, I can't help but feel an emotion I forgot so long ago, sympathy. Not in some cheap way were people say they "feel sorry" only so they can attempt to earn your trust only to stab you in the back a moment later.
I have felt the devastation of betrayal, abuse, and loneliness from everyone I have ever come in contact with, family absolutely being no exception. What purpose is there to living in such a world? Why live when there is no future except more pain.
I know my death would bring nothing emotional to my family except maybe relief. I have no friends so that limits the playing field. I simply wake up each day and go to class, come back, sleep, and repeat the process. I have become so mechanical lately that I don't even feel alive. Every passing day seems like a split second in my desolate world, a world comprised of emotionless actions followed by nothing more than a harsh reality of despair constantly staring back at me. Why couldnt I have lived a happy life, void of such misery? Nooo, I had to have so many fuck ups that I am destined to be alone for the rest of my life even if I dont want to. This used to be fine with me, but that was also a time when I had become a horrific shadow of the former kindness I once held in my frail heart.
I am sure that every one of you would make such excellent friends, as would I. We are all too familiar with pain and betrayal (one in the same.) I wish I could meet you, if nothing more than to talk, to be understood and not looked at as some monster. I almost shot myself when I was merely 11 years old, and then some times after that. I cut myself to relieve the unrelenting psychological pain, but now I cant even do that, for there is far too much pain, physical and mental. Most of my past I dont even remember, probably because I dont want to. I still want to calmness of death, yet I keep blindly following this maybe it will get better philosophy which is nothing more than a lie, an extension of mankinds will to survive. I probably will go through with it soon enough. I am going to stick it out . just a little longer. Foolish optimism but I dont want to die knowing that if I had waited one more day something would have changed.
I dont know what I can do, but if anyone would like to e-mail me, if nothing more than to talk, go right ahead and do so. People like us are driven into a life of darkness, which contradicts the purity of our actual being. We were not born for such misery; the other assholes who are enjoying life are the ones who should be feeling the pain. Not us.
I may have reached my dead end, but I want to at least help someone find a new course in life that will bring about happiness, if for nothing else than to hear them out. Maybe that way I can feel like I actually lived.
|27 Oct 2003||Felicia||Suicide is only too easy of a way out. It is a cruel world out there. Take for instance my new job. I feel unappreciated and realized that it is such a dead end job. Some higher ups use the state of the economy as a crutch to cut down your hours or lay you off. Later, you read between the lines. No eye contact is the first sign, especially when someone looks to the left and their feet seem to point away from you, not towards you. The same thing goes for broken relationships.
It seems that I work from job, after job, after job and go from relationship, after relationship, after relationship. It's sad to know that people out there haven't seen our talents or ambitions and never love or like us for who we are. Some inadvertently make our lives a living hell even if we care about them. But in all aspects, if we cant make a job better, change it. If the relationship isnt working, change it or change friends.
As a result, those of us feel that living day to day is close to dying. Literally, dying is the only option in getting rid of the pain.
I can go on forever talking about this subject on pain.
But we have to remember "LIFE IS PAIN!! GET USED TO IT!!"
We have to remember to go forward before drowning.
And keep pushing to move forward,
Life is one long street fight and we have to learn to deal with the bruises of its unsuccess.
We have to learn to be tough. I say that to all my friends, especially my gay male friends and lesbian female friends. I say this to myself too and very often.
Suicide is no resort. Never have this as your last resort.
And to Lee, if you feel that your friend is still alive buried in that box, six feet under, most likely he is not alive. Mortuaries do not bury live bodies and usually dead bodies are in the regamortis stage meaning absolutely not alive. Working with a Mortician was an odd job, but at least the customers didnt talk back to you. Whats so funny is I even talk to them and once in a while. During preparation, all I hear is a deep groan.meaning the air is finally out of the body.
For your pain, I feel it. Cry if you have to, scream if you must. But remember that this grieving stage in your life, which will take time, too shall pass.
As for every dead end job, it too shall be a former job. For every bad relationship, we too will remember that one day, these people will all be a part of our past. Time can be a cruel in the saddest stages of our life, yet it can be a good friend because most of the time it heals all wounds.
|27 Oct 2003||lee||this past may, my best friend in the whole world killed himself. he took an overdose of prescribed morphine (he was hording pills for this occassion). he had recently talked about suicide, but this was his first attempt (wildly successful, i might add).
i often wonder what he would think if he could see his boxed body in the cold ground. i wonder if he was really dead when they buried him, or was he just so unconscious that they thought he was dead - i wonder if he awoke a week later to find himself in a dark coffin, knowing that his only escape was a slow claustrophobic hell. i wonder if he had second thoughts about it all as he was so doped up he couldn't raise an eyebrow, and panicked for his life but was unable to rouse anyone else in the house to save him. i wonder if he could forsee the darkness and pain he left behind to all who loved him - i doubt it, because i could never have forseen how broken-hearted i'd be without him. i wonder if there was anything i could have done or said to save him, and i'll take that torment with me to my own grave. i wonder if i killed myslef, could i catch up with him and spend forever with him? i wonder where he is now, does he maintain any cosmic consciousness, or is it all a big black nothing, or has he been reborn as a puppy, or broken out of his egg as a baby wolf spider.
all i am left with are memories. little about suicide makes sense to me, except that people who kill themselves generally do NOT want to die, but accept death reluctantly as the only way out of - what they perceive to be - a hopeless situation. whatever. i miss him. i wish he knew that while his misery is gone, the people who loved him and cared about him are just beginning their misery - the guilt, the heartache, missing him terribly.
if he could see his broken-hearted mother as i have, bent over in sorrow, would he put his arm around her and try to take away her pain?
|27 Oct 2003||MauvaisSouhait||Silent tears fall from my eyes, rolling down my cheeks onto my lips. Pain and sadness has a salty taste. It's upsetting to believe people care about u when they don't. I wish someone cared, i wish someone wanted to be w/ me. I wish a lot of things but i have to realize that's a fantasy, i have to understand that in my reality i will not have anything that which i wish. In my reality I walk as though i'm dead, as though i have no life. Maybe i should make that true. Maybe i should finally end my meaningless life. Would anyone miss me? No one knows me, they know of me but no one knows the real me, so how could anyone miss me? No one is at a loss. Maybe i'll finally not wake in the morning. So many questions, what is my fate? I wish i knew, i wish i had someone to talk to. I wish i wasn't alone. But like i said... i never get my wish|
|26 Oct 2003||Gary||Hello Leanne, Chris, all of you, I feel like I wandered into the right wrong room, imagine you all here like chicks in the nest, mouths wide singing distress, eyes shut. Pretty scary I can tell you. There are no answers are there, at least it means something to not feel quite such a freak. I've had some dark times and never feel so bad when I realise it's more common than I thought.
I've never thought that it's true that the devil has the best tunes, it's the ones suffering from depression who have the best tunes. Happiness, mostly, begets nothing, depression takes you to the depths and pops you back up like a cork. My only solace is making art about the journey and from what I've read here alot of you are doing the same. It's a real pleasure to hear people so eloquent in their distress, and no, I'm not trying to be facetious. Good luck to you all and how come I don't meet people like you in real life?
|26 Oct 2003||pierre||La mort, cette dernière inconnue que veulent découvrir tout les hommes, le grand mystère de l'après que veulent élucider bien avant l'heure tout ceux qui ont fait le choix de se suicider.
En effet, le suicide est le plus grand, le plus responsable et quoique que les gens bien pensant veuillent bien dire, le plus libre des actes quun homme puisse envisager. C'est d'ailleurs pourquoi j'ai choisit de faire l'apologie de cette manière de finir sa vie.
Pour commencer nous pouvons remarquer que le suicide repose sur le jugement négatif que l'on porte sur une situation, sur des problèmes qui nous dépassent et que l'on sait ne jamais devoir se terminer un jour, c'est donc en toute connaissance de cause, après avoir envisagé la portée de son acte et les conséquences que cela peut avoir sur sa famille que celui qui décide de se suicider passe à l'acte. C'est donc une certaine forme de choix, ce qui revient à dire que c'est une forme de liberté, un geste par lequel on se rend libre de refuser une vie que l'on a pas réclamée, c'est pourquoi, ceux qui veulent se suicider et qui mettent fin à leur jour n'agissent jamais sous la contrainte mais plutot après avoir choisi librement de mourir.
D'autre part, nous pouvons également dire que le suicide peut se placer en une sorte de philosophie. En effet, qu'est ce qu'une philosophie sinon un choix délibéré de pouvoir mener sa vie comme bon nous semble, de pouvoir placer librement ses règles, ses droits et ses devoirs. Le suicide peut se placer dans cette optique là, en effet celui qui veut se suicider s'arroge le droit de mourir et se donne comme devoir de faire changer une situation qu'il juge assez intolérable pour mettre fin à ses jours.
Pourtant de nos jours, cette philosophie est contestée et le suicide reste dans la plupart des société un sujet tabou. Pourquoi? Tout simplement parce que la société dans laquelle nous vivons refuse que certaines personnes décident pleinement de leur existence, aussi bien de leur vie que de leur mort. L'Etat cherche à controler l'individu, à forger une société ou même s'il existe des communautés, il y toujours le fardeau des lois qui fait ployer les hommes et les forcent à courber le dos. La liberté n'est pas cela, la liberté, c'est de pouvoir choisir ce que l'on veut faire, de pouvoir juger de nos actes, de notre existence et, lorsqu'elle devient un fardeau pour nous ou pour les autres, de pouvoir la supprimer sans avoir de compte à rendre à une quelconque morale
C'est pourquoi, si certaines personnes, certain jeunes hésitent à passer à l'acte à cause de certaine valeurs, il n'ont qu'à les oublier, à les dénigrer et ainsi se tuer librement.
KILL YOUR GOD
KILL YOUR MOM AND DAD
|26 Oct 2003||MauvaisSouhait||I'm not so sure that I can continue trying to live life. I know we all say.. today's the day and all that bs but idk. I finally started cutting on a place other than my arm. It hurt worse on my thigh but atleast this way i can wear short sleeves again. Cutting isnt much of a good way to die tho. Just to feel pain. but if u do cut, take it deep from ur wrist upward to atleast the middle of ur arm. but make it up and down, not side to side. why not try something dramatic though? There are bound to be snakes outside.. why not go to the woods.. find a snake take ur shoes and socks off and let it bite u.. make sure its poisonous. sounds fun huh? very interesting. Not that anyone really cares if i die or not. if they do care, they dont show it. oh well. i was apparently just a mistake, as i've been told numerous times.|
|26 Oct 2003||becky||take a bunch of sleeping pills then fall asleep on the train track thats what i wanted to do|
|26 Oct 2003||Jose||Age dont matter when you want to commit suicide. i am 21 and life doesnt mean anything to me. my whole life has been nothing but pain, hurt , drama, when you have so much sadness for some people suicide is the only answer. i have tried committing suicide plenty of times and of course i have failed and was sent to so many different shrinks but i dont care i still see no point of life no pill or shrink cant take away your depression if is this how u are i think depression is my happiness i am just waiting for one time a big problem comes and i finally do what i told people. not everyone is happy, its the cowardly way out but you wont be here anymore. i have a fine wife and a beautifull 2 months girl and i still feel like world is nothing to me one good thing to say when depress is "f*** da world"|
|26 Oct 2003||Felicia||I am still alive. Unfortunately the spiders under my mattress don't think so. Been reading into Chris's posts which are quite interesting. He outbeats my sense of humor, and overthrows me with his genius. I have been reading into the Witchcraft stuff and casting spells on ex-boyfriend's by turning them into toads. There's one at my window sill right now.
Be right back....
(Smash!!! Accompanied by rabbit screaming!!)
Okay the bad spell is gone now.
Carry on my wayward wailing Banshee!!
Hail to the Gay Punk!
|26 Oct 2003||Oliver Hardwick||Fill a bath up with salt water then drop electrical appliances in it, then sit in it.|
|26 Oct 2003||talli||down a bottle of toilet cleaner|
|25 Oct 2003||Leanne2Chris||Chris, I'll quite happily sit next to you on the bus. You'd be the one I'd want to dance with in a club to a romantic song and if it were possible, my shoulder will always be available just for you. But this is the really real world and IT HURTS.|
|25 Oct 2003||ronwelthy||Yes it's me again, the new gothic. I wanted first to change my name, to make it sound more gothic, but if I do this, nobody will recognize me anymore so I keep the name of the offspring's drummer. A punk.
In away, punk and gothic are the same in a way, they criticize our world and want a change and I agree we really need a change, and not in 2000 years but now, but they are different on the way they deliver their message. I mean gothic are more individualist, more secret and just try to change their own personnality, to ameliorate their own life with no care for the others. Punk are more violent and are less individualist, they want to make everybody change, so they wear flashy clothes, torn trousers.
And those two movements are the only one who want a real change, who try to deal with the shitty world we live in. And I mean, people who want to kill themselve are like them, they are shouting at the face of the world, You see, you see where all this shit drives me to, now I want to see if it is better somewhere else. So, to all the people who want to kill themselve, just tell people why you really want to kill yourself, throw at their faces what you think, and you will make think about how they could change their lives in order to make the world a better place.
Suicide is in a way a real act of protestation and the greatest one you could do in your life: first it the choice you make yourself, then it is a protestation against the world you live in..
Let the revolt go on