|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|11 Jan 2004||Your parent||What is the boundary between art and psychotic breakdown? You fuckers are sick... After reading some of this shit, I think I will go to church this Sunday. Just a thought, probably sleep my ass until dawn. Yes, you fuckers are evil. This mouchette bitch is the grand whore sitting on a pile of feces and 13 year old fuck heads. Go to hell. At first i thought some artistical thoughts are not too bad. But it just getting strange. Damn... May the Holy Mother of Jesus cleanse your soul with her innocent vagina. So you can taste the fruit of life and the body of the lord.|
|11 Jan 2004||Joe Lee||Hi, I am Chinese here to recommand a film for you kids to watch "Big Shot's Funeral" with Donald Sutherland, Xiaogang Feng, You Ge, and Rosamund Kwan. So you kids can learn how Chinese people taking death very seriously.
find it, watch it, share with your friends.
|11 Jan 2004||Elaine|| I don't want to kill myself, not really, No. Sometimes all i really need are a few sleeping pills - i can sleep my life away until better times come, because they always do, i Know. And it's days like These that i remember Lucy Cortina and how she made us all laugh and how she helped cry away my tears.
I've been here years and am breaking a precedent - Listening is always so much pleasanter than partaking so I've never before posted. I guess tha'ts how i live my life and I've got now to assume that that's my problem and why days like these bring me down in ways like this.
Billy, i'm glad youre still around some, with Lucy's sudden departure i begin to feel like the rest of the world has moved on past this phase and I'm still stuck here in my sick desperation. I wonder, does she still check in on us?
Life, friends, family, school, strangers opress and judge all the time... this is my haven. Do you realise, my darling Mouchette, the importance of what you have created? I think you say it best yourself in an old post about our dear Lucy...
And as long as Lucy Cortina writes her daily story, I shall want to live one more day to know what she will write next.
... I think this marks the end of my stay on Mouchette.org. Seeing my own words tarnish the thoughts of others is more than I can take. Maybe this is all i need to move on. I am forever raptured, ruptured.
|10 Jan 2004||Chris||Hello my little children. After doing some soul searching at the beginning of the new year I discovered who I really am! Do you not recognise my Gothic script? It is me, your dear, dark, companion Lucifer (better known as the devil). Forgive me for intruding into your daily monotonous lives out of the blue like this. In the olden days my traffic on earth was quite a normality and I had a hell of a time transmogrifying myself to my (and your) heart's desire. People then had this fertile imagination and would conjure me up in the most imponderable of guises. Nowadays, sad to say, I dare not appear anymore for fear of being laughed at. My only remedy is to send these messages by e-mail to your personal computers. And what an invention, my little friends. I must congratulate you for surpassing even my wildest expectations. You have aspired to be like God himself and you seem to be succeeding even better than I.
You are growing up so I have decided to let you into a secret. You can check out all that I will be saying with many authoritative literary sources that are now available on the internet. Because in reality my secret is not so much a secret after all. It has been known all the time by people who had the sense to understand the phenomenon that I represent.
Western mythology, as you will recall, begins with that foreboding trinity of characters: Adam, Eve and Myself. He is the first Man, she the first Woman and I am the Serpent. Now, have you ever asked yourselves, why I should have dressed up as a snake of all animals? Well, you see, ancient peoples considered snakes a bit of an enigma: they have strange, sleek bodies for a start... but above all they seem to renew themselves every now and then. In fact they shed their skins, as any naturalist will know. It will not be hard to realise that snakes then represented the very essence of life itself, because life is in a wide sense indestructible and renews itself constantly by shedding one skin and putting on another. Not by chance one of the authors of Genesis has me wound up the Tree of Life itself!
In another account, however, I climb up the Tree of Knowledge and invite Eve (and then, of course, Adam) to grow up and become moral beings by knowing good and evil. This account is even more interesting than the first, because here I am actually helping mankind rise from its innocent, animal condition, symbolised by Eden, to become thinking Homo Sapiens. Snakes are wily, crafty and terribly intelligent creatures- pretty much like you- and it was fitting that I should lead your ancestors symbolically over the threshold into human-hood.
So why all the fuss, you might ask, with the Old Man getting angry over a forbidden apple, when all it meant was that humans started to think and make value judgments? You do that all the time and pride yourselves with the edge it gives you over all the other animals. So what was old God so angry about? Didn't he make you in his own image in the first place?
The truth, my dear friends, as your illustrious Darwin guessed, was that there never was an Eden, a golden age of innocence, when the wolf slept with the sheep and the lion with the gazelle. The very idea, from an evolutionary point of view, is absurd. Humans were never innocent, naked babies like Adam, but descended from apes and behaved pretty much like troops of baboons. You all know the story of course.
The problem for the Jews who wrote the Bible however, was not the duality between Innocence and Sin, but that between Freedom and Civilisation. You must realise that the ancient Jews were nomads, like the Bedouin of Arabia, who tended their flocks and roamed the desert in search of waterholes. They were free from the shackles of civilian authority, from manual labour in the fields, from sedentary slavery and interdependence. Eden for them symbolised the perfect waterhole, the oasis of their dreams where they could rest in the shade, count their animals and laze about to their heart's content.
When their scriptures were written, the Jews had come along from this idyllic existence and had been forced by the accidents of history and their own ethnic evolution to adapt the ways of the world; they had become civilised. Now they had mud houses, farmed the land, built temples to their God, erected walls around their cities, created social classes, bureaucracies and appointed their own kings. Yet in their heart of hearts they still yearned for their long, lost freedom and never more so when they were conquered and enslaved by their enemies.
So for them the 'first fall' was not from innocence, but from freedom. Cain the farmer killed his brother Abel the goat herd because God was displeased with his fruits and cereals, and preferred the smell of the kid's blood from his brother's altar. There you have the quintessential myth that explains the 'sin' of the Agricultural Revolution and Civilisation. And all throughout the Bible, the Jews were constantly reminded that commerce with the civilised world will be punished.
All this left me, as you know, in a bit of quandary. Of course I had to go out with the bathwater, and so I- the snake, Lucifer- became the antagonist of God. From harbinger of Knowledge and Fertitlity, I was transformed into the very essence of Evil. And Evil was everything that had to do with civilisation: idolatry, pestilence, war, sexual perversion, gluttony... you know, the lot. All my images- the snake, the goat, the bull and the mother goddess- became false gods, demons. Some of my symbols, like the crescent moon signifying the cyclic recurrence of time, the trident symbolising agriculture, the pig, the very mainstay of animal husbandry, were rendered evil and forbidden.
Women, my traditional allies in the lores of agriculture, became my evil accomplices: witches, whose fertility dances around the equinox fires condemned them as my sinister and soulless collaborators.
Because of women, sex, which is the very essence of life, became a by-word for bodily corruption and degeneration. Instead of a healthy exercise in propagating terrestial life, it became the symbolic exercise in procuring spiritual death.
So here I was, as you would say, thrown into the gutter, divested from my true noble role as personification of Civilisation and calumniated continually as a devourer of humans, a perpetrator of evil, the great Tempter, the great Destroyer. I know that in this day and age there is little space for such abstract anthropomorphisms like me. You have science to illuminate you in the secrets of mother nature. But remember this, my dear little friends, that your Original Sin is not a blot which you somehow inherit in your genes, but the very culture that has been transmitted down the ages and which you call Civilisation. The baboons and chimps from which you have descended are smart enough to know right from wrong even though in a limited way... but it was only you, Homo Sapiens, who invented that most original of ambiguities: civilised life, which has fucked you all up and disppointed you and made you all suicidal because of your too high expectations for life.
I have been called many names: Leviathan, Xaitan, Kali, Beelzebub and my gifts have been varied: fertility, life and death, life after death, intelligence... but one thing I am not: abstract, absolute Evil. Good and evil are abstractions fabricated in your cerebral cortex, like love, logic, mathematics and music.
If you want to save humanity (and it's about time, it's bloody 2004), you must not take me for granted anymore. There is only one enemy you must fight: yourselves. Go shoot yourselves! Bye for now.
Cya all in hell!
|10 Jan 2004||Alexa!||Put your head in a plastic bag (i call it death by Walmart), Lock yourself in a freezer, Pretend you're a fish while you're in your pool/tub, Sleep UNDER your matress, Wait for the light to turn green then try to cross the street, Drink the liter fluid, Jump out your bedroom window. I have more, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org I have attempted suicide many times. it's fun!!|
|09 Jan 2004||Crack Kid||Smoke some crack. Get really high. It feels good. Don't it?|
|09 Jan 2004||Boaz||the best way to kill yourself is to lock yourself in a car AFTER you plug up the exhaust pipe close all windows, start the car take a few Tylenol PMs and go to sleep. The Carbon Monoxide will back up into the car and you will feel no pain as you go to sleep forever! Thats what i am gonna do after i put all my Affairs in order and Mail out letters to all my Family and Friends!|
|08 Jan 2004||Will||Does anyone remember me? I havent been here for ages. Thankfully, im now online again, yippee.|
|08 Jan 2004||sokol||Thinking I am not under 13.|
|08 Jan 2004||don't ask||if ur 13.. and are suicidal.. just think.. that's all you have to do.. is think.. however u feel it will come.. there are lots of things.. just be calm it will come.. hanging myself came to me.. didn't work.. beam in closet broke.. so that one wasn't the one.. just think.. it will come to you..|
|07 Jan 2004||Laura||Slitting your wrist or hanging yourself!|
|07 Jan 2004||Jasonifer||This is to all the people who complain about this site:
1) Suicide hurts, but so can things like sex / childbirth / taking a shit, so pain doesn't equate to wrong.
2) How did Samson in the bible die? He fucking killed himself. He pushed the pillars apart, causing himself and a whole lotta dicks to die with him. Wanna bet on where he ended up?
3) Suicide is a symptom of a disease. It's natural and normal to feel suicidal. And homicidal. You're based on ape DNA, like it or not. Ever watch apes in the wild? They rape, they murder. Except they don't have the moral overhead we do. (well, most of you anyway)
4) god is a fairy tale. Without man, god wouldn't even be a concept. Man made god. Life is pointless, and we are utterly alone. Enjoy the scattered moments of happiness you get, for they are the only reason you've not killed yourself yet.
5) I desperately want to die. I can't keep a girlfriend, a job, or even a plant alive. I make $40 a day. There are no jobs. I have bills. I can make a computer walk, can program artificial neurons in assembly language, and have no formal education. (9th grade dropout, 26 now) I'm the only person I know that has a thourough understanding of the theory of relativity and have read it in its native form. I have also studied the bible in hebrew and greek. I can bench 265, I can run a mile in 4:10. I am tall, dark and handsome I'm told. In short, I am better than you, and even I don't have a clue.
|07 Jan 2004||Buddism Artist||This site sucks, spice it up a bit. Pictures of corpse will be nice. KIDS! if you gonna commit suicide, please take the before and after picture, so you will be famous after you die. Have your friend photocopy the death certificate. I am getting sick of all these talks with no actions. I might start to kill someone soon. If I know where you live, i will go over there and kill you in your sleep personally! Yes, i will cut off your head with a samurai sword while you are sleeping. No pain, simple end. Com'on!!! pussy shit, I want to set you free. You might even go to heaven, who knows. Email your address to me, leave your doors unlocked at night, I will kill you, take picture, and send it everywhere in the world. Be a sport, be an artist, be famous after you die. Don't worry, I am a sword master. 0.03 second to chop your head off. I am not even asking to get paid.|
|07 Jan 2004||anonymous||13!?! I'm not a doctor or professional and I'm not gonna tell you that everyone does understand what you're going through.. maybe they don't, but have you tried talking to them? I know sometimes life gets rough but there are always going to be the ups and downs in life... sometimes we just have to take in the bad with the good. Please listen to what I have to say. People love you. Even though i don't know you I still care about you and I'm sure you're just as special as anyone else. By taking your life you will only hurt others as well as yourself. I read in this one site that killing yourself won't make you happy it will simply make you dead! Do you realize that suicide is the 3rd leading cause of death in the us. Well believe it. There is no reason why anyone has to suffer from depression or why they need to feel un-loved, to the world you may be one person but to one person you may be the world. There are tons of people that are out there willing to help you to listen to you and to love you. If you are doing this for attention .. please there are other ways.. become a circus clown or something. With high hopes and a better outlook on life you will eventually realize that you may want to live after all. Are you positive it's better on the other side, is the grass really greener? Like a wise person said once you've hit rock bottom there's no place to go but up! Please smile for me I believe in you all of you out there who are having trouble in life and need a friend :) there are others like you, talk with them but do not, i repeat do not, do something you will most definitely regret later on... I can't stop you from doing what you want I don't even know you. The only thing i can do is hope and pray for you tonight to think of what you're about to try and help you realize it's not worth it. I have nothing more to say except please have faith and believe in yourself like I do ... don't let others drag you down with them Love-the world|
|06 Jan 2004||leanne||hi i'm 16 so i'm not under 13 but i have been suicidal for that long. i've read what everyone else has written and it made me realise just how many people feel the same as me. some days i'm really high and everything is great, other times i'm depressed and just wanna hurt myself. sometimes i just wanna slit my wrists for the fun of it and watch the blood pour down my arm. i laugh at the thought of it but deep down inside i really wanna do it. i have a great life - well so it seems to others but my pain is deep down and it won't go away|
|05 Jan 2004||LeyAnn||I think you are all selfish and inconsiderate. Not one of you have thought about the people you will leave behind or the people you may injure during your suicide. There is plenty of free help in the world because everyone needs help at some time in their lives. Please consider your friends, family or even getting help before doing something totally selfish. No one asks to be born but your life is what you make it and only you can improve it. I considered suicide due to being severely bullied at school, i'm very happy I didn't. I love my family and my life is now what I made it.|
|05 Jan 2004||ozz||steal your father's gun, take it to school and when all the little children are watching, blow your fucking brains (make sure they're watching) there you're dead and all the little shits around you are warped for life....|
|05 Jan 2004||Anibal...||es el encanto de la vida, el hijo de nuestro tiempo, de nuestro sistema, donde los medios cotidianos se emplean hasta en el más privado de nuestros tesoros: la Muerte.|
|05 Jan 2004||July||WELL I'VE HAD A LOT OF TIME TO THINK ABOUT THAT SUBJECT. I'VE BEEN LOCKED UP IN A PADDED ROOM FOR THE PAST 2 YEARS BECAUSE I TRIED TO KILL MYSELF. BUT I WAS SUPID I DIDN'T MAKE SURE NO ONE WAS GOING TO FIND ME BEFORE I WAS LONG GONE. I HATE MY LIFE I STILL FUCKING FO. I TRIED TO COMMIT SUICIDE THE DAY AFTER MY 14 B'DAY AND IT FUCKING SUCKS. I HAD NEEDLES IN ME I HAD TO GET A BLOOD TRANSFUSION BECUZ I LOST SO MUCH BLOOD. THINK ABOUT IT BEFORE YOU TRY. I WOULDN'T I REALLY WOULDN'T! THE PADDED ROOM FUCKING SUCKZ|
|05 Jan 2004||Adam||I really don't know what to say. To someone on the outside I may seem pedantic or as if i'm exaggerating, but they're not me and they don't understand what I am going through. I've thought about doing this for a while now, but there are always two things holding me back. How can I do it without having to experience the pain? And how will god judge me if I do it? Such hurt can't be sustained for a long period of time. I need to escape. Is the grass greener on the other side?|