|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|11 Nov 2003||Leanne2Chris||I think about you too.
But things are getting hard. I've spent my days taking tablets (not attempts). Punishing myself for being unprepared. Unprepared at the fact I can't take it lying in bed wondering what the fuck is happening to Mauvais. When I thought she went, it was just like the time I thought Just A Girl went (and thank christ she's still here). It's also just like the time when Gay Punk and Will among others decided to disappear off the face of the earth.. I mean... WHERE ARE THEY?!
I figured 'Leanne, HELLO!- It's a fucking suicide site. Whether I like it or not, these things are going to happen. People will come and some will go.' I can't take it.
I cherish the fact you Chris are still here, and you Mauvais, but it also breaks my heart you guys and others want to fade away, in the same way I want to fade away... I almost did... if only I increased the dosage.
I'm losing the will, the energy and the love to live. I put pressure on Just A Girl when I told her how much I loved her entries. I'm not prepared to do that again to others. It puts pressure on me in turn.
I'm in a desperate search to restore my faith in myself. I wasn't strong before, but I'm even weaker now.
I'm trying Chris, but as you all know, it's hard all on your lonesome.
|11 Nov 2003||rey||I throw up so much maybe i should stop taking 12 sleeping pills a day and look for help.|
|11 Nov 2003||Rey||Hi i am rey i am a girl. I really need someone to talk to that i can relate to, i really dont want to be alone enymore. i am scared to be alive, my mother never stops making fun of me and i find myself talking to no one. i use to live for playing guitar but my mother took everthing i had to live for away . i fantasize about swallowing a cup of razor blades and never waking up.|
|11 Nov 2003||dribbles||it's painless and absolutely great.... lock yourself in a caravan and make sure everything is shut up.... then turn on the little gas stove and just leave it.. u will get gased out and just fall asleep and never wake up :)|
|11 Nov 2003||Excuse me im mizzie||forget to breathe is my suggestion. by not breathing you are cutting of the oxygen supply to your lungs which pumps oxygen to the heart which pumps oxygen into the blood. the blood then bring oxygen to your cells, so with out oxygen your cells die, and eventually you die. you have to be very good at this stop breathing, because if you suck then you're breathing in, and you defeat the whole purpose. Thank you for your time, and i hope that you will be successful with my method.|
|10 Nov 2003||amorvincensculpa||Forget about suicide. Read my treatise and die of boredom. Sorry folks.|
|09 Nov 2003||Chris||Rejoice, Mauvais is still with us. For a change I could remove a burden off my shoulders so I e-mailed at once but she never e-mailed back. What's wrong luv? I see you are asking us if you should try again. Can you just hang in there some more, we love you. How do you hang in there? er, just think stupid thoughts, read and memorise stupid information and do stupid things. Sounds complicated and stupid? I'll try to explain...
There are two types of mind, one which absorbs knowledge selecting it and sifting the incoming information, retaining the really useful stuff for later retrieval and appreciation in order to become wiser and more successful in life. And then there is brain-type two, which for no known reason does the opposite, dumping anything useful or worthwile but hanging onto other pieces of useless rubbish it encounters. The reason I will never drive a Jaguar, dress French expensive suits and take my holidays in the Bahamas is obvious... I have a type-two intellect, desperately clinging onto the useless while promptly losing any knowledge which could be translated into hard cash. For a while a few years ago, when the game Trivial Pursuit was launched, the fact that I could churn out useless information was quite handy and I enjoyed a brief period when the pursuit of the trivial seemed like an achievement, but sadly the craze soon died down. Recently the internet has played an increasingly big role in the lives of people like me. It is a bottomless pit of the most useless information imaginable, and rarely a day passes that doesn't see the influx of more absolutely useless information into my mailbox.
Here are some that arrived the other day. Read them and then ask yourself if you would like the type of brain that told you that they are worth committing to memory... The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flinstone. It's impossible to lick your elbow. The first novel ever written on a typewriter was Tom Sawyer. If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes. In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase: "Goodnight, sleep tight".
It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based this period was called the honey month. Today we use the phrase: 'honeymoon'. In English pubs, ale is ordered in pints and quarts. So in old England, when customers got unruly the bartender would yell at them to mind their own pints and quarts and settle down. It's where we get the phrase: mind your P's and Q's...
Still have not got it yet? Well it can take your mind off suicide for some time. Er, can't explain further! Just hang in there some more Mauvais and please tell me that you got my e-mail and if you want I told you how to get mine!
P.S Leanne, are you still there? You used to write often and it has just been some time since you last wrote. I think about you. xxxxxx
See ya great thinkers!
|09 Nov 2003||Chris age 12||Well ive bin considerin followin all this advice on haow to kill yourself and i wanted to put my own advice in!
1. Ride yor bike head on with a semi.
2. Bake Anti Freeze in your Christmas cokkies.
3. Spray Wasp Spray in a plastic bag and stick it over your head with an elastic bag.
|09 Nov 2003||ronwelthy2mauvais souhait||Of course no, do not try to kill yourself.. because if you do, we won't be able to read your message on mouchette's site, and you see, you are a very interesting girl, so don't do it...|
|09 Nov 2003||amorvincensculpa||I have some trouble with words. Words of existence. 'Your' is a word of posession (sp?) nothing else; it means somebody else owns something, as in 'your life' not mine, not the government's, not my lover's, not a god's, yours and yours alone, to have or not to have. As you so choose. As I so choose. 'You're,' on the other hand, is a word of existence, meaning you are, and nothing else. It was Mauvais' choice. I respect that. It's my choice. Words can't touch what you are going through or what Mauvais is or was going though. I'm sorry, very sorry that happened. Between I and You, Chris? I know what that feels like--how horrible that is, when you have to trust that the other person won't saw you in half because they can. When they can give and you can give and somehow this other thing like light and common blood (even if there's no physical contact) happens.
I am sitting here and I realize that I can't tell whether that's the sound of the fan over my bed or the wind going through my soul, if I have one. He's at work, and I'm at home. I am alive because I don't want to hurt him, and I have somebody to hold, but beyond all reason with a knowing I can't explain, I must be dead. It feels like a waste of resources; I feel like it is my destiny to die by my own hand.
What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore-
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over--
like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load
Or does it explode?
What do you think, Chris? I think I could kill myself the best just by being me. Either way I'm gone, or it's all gone, or you're gone, or we're gone, my question is: now or later? I don't know if I'm dead inside or not. Where did my dreams go?
ee cummings said dying is perfectly normal, reasonable, "but death, oh baby i wouldn't like death, if death were good."
Chris, you can't Do or Say anything to anyone that can really make them change their mind if they've decided to do something or say something or feel something. But I love regardless. I can't help it. I wish I could. I did die, physically and otherwise, once, by my own hand. It's not that hard, really, easier to do than you would think. When you stop thinking and feeling, that is. Or when you feel yourself into being dead. I think I can remember what happened. I just pressed a few buttons on my insulin pump, lost my mind, hallucinated, screamed over the phone at some poor guy I had met at a flea market, lost consciousness, went into seizures, and died. Someone found my body. I was brought back, somehow. Probably with glucagon--it's a hormone--anyway.
Edward Fitzgerald said, "The moving finger writes, and having written, moves on. Nor all your piety nor wit, can undo one line, or change a word of it." Timothy McVeigh said that, before he was put to death. Bill Clinton said that when he gave a press conference.
I will die soon. But matter can neither be created nor destroyed. That is the law of the universe. I choose DNR (look it up), but I'll always be a smear on somebody's back porch. Or a shadow in a cement apartment, dying alone, having planned it that way, among all my books and years' worth of matter. My question is, why do people who end their own lives have to die alone? Mauvais wasn't alone Chris--she had you with her. I would like someone with me when I go. I thought that was tonight. I feel like I'm being toyed with. But I don't want to go alone. I liked what you said, Chris. I'm sorry that Mauvais, or you, is hurting. The you chose to go, and the I chose to live. Or do we choose such things? The choice is ours. I don't think we choose to love. Love complicates things. My heart, as it is, is with you both. Take care in whatever you choose. To die by your own hand or to stay alive by your own hand, either way, you are living.
|09 Nov 2003||Steve||I'm surprised that I'm not dead yet. I was pretty sure I'd have killed myself by now about a month ago, but I am still here. I don't know how much longer I'll be around though. I'm on Zoloft and though it seems to make me more calm and relaxed, it doesn't prevent me from feeling really low at times and wanting to end my life sometime in the near future. I'd like to speak to some of you, as I'm bored most of the time, so please email me at the address provided if you're interested.|
|08 Nov 2003||Steve||If you feel you must kill yourself, then do it. Though the thought of inflicting deadly pain on yourself may be horrifying, it's the only way you're going to succeed, because pills on their own or even with alcohol are pretty useless. They'll most likely just leave you with some damage to your organs if anything. If you actually want to end your life then you're going to have to use something more reliable than pills.|
|08 Nov 2003||mauvaissouhait||I'm ready yet again to die. shall i try?|
|08 Nov 2003||dewy||I must admit that I am way above the age of 13 (by 10 years) but I too have the dream of suicide. My prefered choice of death is hanging, though I have not mustered up the balls to do this. But a way I have yet to try is asprin. I have read that 65 regular strength (not baby) asprin will do the trick. Shoot for 70 just to make sure. And good luck to all who try.|
|07 Nov 2003||The one||Ok, go to psychiatrist with the parents, tell them you are depressed and obtain a prescription for Anafranil a potentially lethal tricyclic antidepressant. Make sure to get at least one pill for every pound of body weight, wash down pills with ice cold Grey Goose Vodka (Flavoured Vodka can add an air of tastefulness to the experience, I used citrus). Anafranil is hepto-toxic and painless but unfortunately juvenile livers have a remarkable resilience and thats why so many pills are called for. I did this but am obviously not dead, although I couldnt walk or contract any muscles for a while and was on a respirator. Damn pinche doctors always fighting to save your life so you might want to wait until you body will not be found for at least 12 hours. Peak plasma for Anafranil is obtained in about four hours at which point you will pass out and slowly stop breathing, a peaceful, painless way to go and your family can still have an open casket funeral. On the upside the Anafranil OD seemed to hardwire my brain differently not so depressed anymore however, I still firmly believe that your life is your own and no one has the right to tell you that you have to live if you dont want to. Just make sure you really think about it, theres no going back. Oh and remember to fill out a living will before attempting suicide (only 1 in 10 suicides succeed) with an Advance Medical Directive and DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) order if anything goes wrong you dont want to be a vegetable ad infinitum, this will ensure prompt death. Of course this is rather selfish as your organs will not be fit for transplant as they would be with the old gun in mouth.|
|07 Nov 2003||666DeathChick315||After seeing for yourself that life isn't what your parents say it is (and seeing that they lied and they really do hate life) sit there and think very carefully about what they said to you through the years. Then when you decide that you really do want to kill yourself, think, do I like gory things or pleasant things? I myself like gory things so I would do it slow and painful. Just sit there and think about ways other people have done it. I've tried pills, cutting myself, hanging myself, and many other ways. But for some reason I just can't find the way that suits me. I think I need more ways. If you think about it, what's this world coming to everyone does if the same way? Why can't people come up with new ways. So I guess I'm not the person to ask but I would really like to think of some ways that no one has thought of yet. Yes, I got it (if you have seen the Texas Chainsaw Massacre you will know what I mean by this) take a nice big hook and hang it on the wall, get something to stand on or someone to lift you up, and the just ram yourself into the hook but make sure that the hook goes into the center of your middle to upper back, and (last part) sit there until you just bleed to death. HINT: make sure that you are alone for a few days because you know you don't want your parents or siblings to walk in and "save your life". That would suck. Just like life. But hey make the best of it and think of new ways to kill yourself and once you think of the perfect one go ahead have fun that is the best advice anyone could truely give you. Hey I can't tell you not to at least try because you wouldn't be the only one to try it. But one thing, just remember this, look at how things are in your life, how you want them (is what you want realistic?), and remember whether you know it or not someone always has it worse and think about how worse it could be and how good you've got it compared to that person. But if you really think it can't get worse then whatever have a ball.|
|06 Nov 2003||nisha||i cant take the pressure no more.
so do you know easy and pain less way to die. im open for any options.
|06 Nov 2003||REALITY||YOU GUYS DONT REALLY WANT TO DIE BECAUSE IF YOU "REALLY" WANTED TO YOU COULD OF. SO, ALL OF YOU WHO HAVE TRIED, you Suck cuz You cant even do that right. Oh i tried 3 times oh, i tried 5 times what is that.... Get over it and do someting with your life.(you guys are soooooo dramatic ..... SNAP OUT OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!|
|05 Nov 2003||peach||hey mauvais, u tried and u failed. . . maybe it means ur not supposed 2 go. ur needed 4 sumthing else? hold on a lil longer things get betta they do, how much did u take anyway?|
|05 Nov 2003||Destinee Martin||hang yourself from a tree, and then kick the chair from under your feet.|