|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|18 Oct 2004||Andy Griffith||Implosion.|
|18 Oct 2004||noone||Suicide isn't so bad, give it a chance.
Thinking about suicide but you're not sure if it's the right thing to do? Here are some tips to help you decide whether or not killing yourself is a good choice:
1. Do you live at home but your parents are always making you clean your room and do your homework? It's a sure sign that they don't love you and that they want you to kill yourself. Why else would they make you clean your room? What are they going to do next, ground you? Make you wear braces? Don't kid yourself, the message is clear.
2. If you just got out of a bad relationship and you feel like things are never going to get better; you're right. Everyone knows that suicide is the only option, stop procrastinating. Look on the bright side, at least your ex will feel guilty for a couple of minutes--but don't count on it.
3. Depressed? Don't have any friends? I guess nobody told you, but being depressed and feeling lonely isn't normal. Everyone else is happy, and has lots of friends so there must be something wrong with you. Put the prozac away, what you need is rat poison.
4. Spill a drink at a party? Drop a plate of food in a restaurant? Nobody else has to live with that kind of embarrassment; you know what you have to do.
5. Flunked out of college? Don't know algebra? Here's a question you should know the answer to: Flunked out of college + Don't know algebra = Time for _____. Chances are you still don't know the answer, so here's a hint: it starts with an 's' and ends in 'uicide'.
6. Traffic jam? Sometimes bad luck isn't a coincidence. Do you really want to sit in traffic for another half hour? Look on the bright side, if you're a viking you'll be going to Valhalla. Then again, you're probably not, but eternal damnation in hell is probably the next best thing.
7. Telemarketers keep calling? It's easier to hang yourself than to get rid of a telemarketer, am I wrong? If you're lucky, Home Depot might be having a sale on rope. After all, you don't want to die letting people think you weren't frugal.
8. Flu? You realize that there's no cure for the flu, right? Well, no cure that doesn't involve painting the wall with your brains.
9. Flat tire? Do I have to spell it out for you?
10. College application get rejected? Take the hint.
Hope you found this guide helpful, mention it in your suicide note. On second thought, why bother? Nobody will read it.
|18 Oct 2004||Aurevoirbyebye||Wait until you're the only one in the house. Heat up a nice warm bath. Get a knife, the sharper the better. Start at the top of the wrist and cut down toward the elbow. Repeat on the other arm. Cut deep, mind you. It might be a little painful, but not for long. Then close your eyes and relax. The combination of warm water and blood loss will soon make you pleasantly drowsy, and you'll want to go to sleep. Don't be afraid, just let yourself drift off.
La mort est un sommeil eternel.
|18 Oct 2004||X||Don't. You're thirteen, you don't know anything about the world. Live your present, don't anticipate the future. If you have problems, have the courage to deal with them either by yourself or with the healp of others. You have no experience with anything, let alone life, so your only real alternative is to let the years move forward and stop trying to justify your lack of knowledge by blaming it on a world you refuse to let yourself live in. Your life is pitiable in comparison to the real anguish that is a given part of living. Your website destroys the credebility of any legitimate desire to do yourself in. The inquisitiveness of it is a weak cry for help, a desperate cry for attention and as hollow as the wind through a dead tree. Sorry, but it's the truth. You can only help yourself and if you can't do that then you should stop asking everyone for permission because the only failure in life is that of not living and this is a CHOICE.|
|18 Oct 2004||Trevor||Angst|
|18 Oct 2004||jen||<b>Hey. Clue up. It's called GROWING UP. Try not wallowing in your misery and go for a walk. Listen to happier music. Stop convincing yourself your life is terrible, you'd be better off dead, etc. And for those of you actually giving suicide advice to children, I have one question for you; what the fuck? How could you possibly encourage small children to do this?! And one more question... You think life is so hard right now, your life is terrible; what's worse? A measly 65-80 years of working through it and making it all the way until you are suppossed to go, or killing yourself right now and spending a damned eternity in hell? There's a reason people don't just kill themselves because they don't like how things are, there are <i>consequences!!</i>
this is pathetic, if you need attention or help or whatever... go to social services, get a shrink, talk to someone that isn't going to tell you suicide is the answer. Bunch of cowards if you back out of life after getting this far... Even thirteen years is a good distance to have come... You're just going to stop now?</b>
|18 Oct 2004||Sharing is caring||Cop assisted suicide. Don't just end your misery by killing yourself, make someone else misirable too !|
|18 Oct 2004||Jason||How about NOT killing yourself? I'm not going to spew off some happy-go-lucky psycho-babble and try to tell you that you have so much to live for, or some crazy shit about God. Instead I'm going to tell you that you're a fucking jerk-off. You're under 13 and you're seriously thinking about killing yourself? What the fuck do you know about life at age 13? So many people have it so much worse than you do and you don't hear them bitching. Here's a better idea - instead of taking the easy way out and becoming a tool for rejects everywhere, how about getting a fucking grip on reality and enlisting the help of some yuppy psychiatrist. Yes, you've got to PAY them to be your friend, but at least you're establishing loyalty. Don't get me wrong - I really don't give a fuck if you die or not. I just think it's pathetic that a person not even 13 years of age thinks they've got it all figured out. News flash: there's more to life than you will ever, EVER know. The least you could do is wait it out a bit, get laid a few times, and maybe experience a few mood-altering substances before you say fuck it all.|
|18 Oct 2004||Don't Kill Yourself||You kids are so messed up. I am pretty sure that alot of you are just saying this stuff because you want to fit in somewhere so you become this goth/satanist/nihilist thing. Seriously, you need help. Life is not that hard, especially in non-Third World countries. I watched my father shoot at my mother. I watched her get beat. I watched my dad beat my aunt. I have been fairly poor for about half of my life. I can hardly pay rent right now. Its still good. You only get one shot at life. Live it. Quit being little pussies and taking the easy way out.|
|18 Oct 2004||bob||one time i tried to kill myself by watching nbc prime time but that only blinded me. want a real mind fuck? how am i writing this if i am blind?|
|18 Oct 2004||Shit Eater||I would drown myself in my own Urine. If I failed to die then I would plug up my nostrils and throat with endless amounts of human feces.|
|18 Oct 2004||tubgirl||this site is the gayest thing since web logs. i would tell you to go kill yourself but u would never be smart enough to figure it out. fucktards!|
|18 Oct 2004||TellMeYourName||Reading too much somethingawful.com, it'll make your will to live drop low enough that your heart just stops beating. Happened to me twice, so far. Thank God for that tesla coil I used to jumpstart it.|
|18 Oct 2004||No One in Particular||Well, guys, I have heard that carbon monoxide poisoning is painless and efficent. Just park your car in a garage and leave it running until you are sleeping forever. Or, I recently heard of a group sucide in Japan last week where 11 people rented a van, sealed the windows with tape, left the van on and also burned coal burning stoves. They are all dead. Good luck, but maybe you should look into living and not wimp out and kill yourself. Either way, I hope I have helped someone.|
|18 Oct 2004||JimmyTango||Why not let someone rape you? That way you win because your whining, angsty, altogether annoying cunt of a self is dead, and some middle aged japanese businessman gets to fulfill his twisted desire of having a child deficate on his face while he jacks off with tabasco sauce.|
|18 Oct 2004||Joe Louie||Tie a length of piano wire around your neck, and a slightly longer rope to your waist. Super-glue your hand to your head, and jump from a bridge at night. In the morning you will be found hanging and holding onto your own head. If you are feeling adventurous, replace the rope around your waist with another piece of piano wire and glue your other hand to your hip.
Guaranteed to get plenty of attention.
|18 Oct 2004||Roderick Gutierrez||Ok, this can be done with a frisbee.
Its a totally sweet way to die.
First, you have to get realy pissed off. I mean REALY pissed off.
Then you take the frisbey, and fold it in half. Since your under 13, you have to be extremely pissed off to be able to fold a frisbey.
Are you pissed off? Good. Now take the folded frisbey, and cram it down your throat. Continue cramming, untill you are no longer living.
|18 Oct 2004||Anon||You people are 13 and under? Jesus. While you are young you can find help for the suffering you are going through - just dont turn to drink or drugs as it will make it worse. The thing is you are recommending killing yourself with this site - dont you know thats the cowards way out? Just dont do it you weird screwed up american people.|
|18 Oct 2004||sleepless in ltown||You know... i went out in search of a way to kill myself tonight and i'm glad I found this site. Am i still sucidal... yeah... but i'm still breathing right now. What really struck me in this site was not all the endless preachy 'don't do it... you have so much to live for... light at the end of the tunnel' shit... what really struck me was the rest of it. I find the only people that can really talk about depression are people who are truly depressed themselves. Even people who 'used' to be should shut up... i heard somewhere that the brain cannot remember physical pain... sure.. you remember it was unpleasant and you can recall a fraction of what it was like but u'll never be able to remember how the pain actually felt. I think it's the same with depression... people who have somehow gotten out of it can remember it was shitty... but they can't really 'feel' it again without becoming depressed and suicidal again. The only postings that mean anything are the people who feel like they want to die... truly want to die.. .not seeking attention. I am one of those people... but i'm a wuss. If there was a 100 percent sure and painless way to kill myself sitting here right now i'd do it. Thats what i came here looking for... but after reading through the endless postings on here... and killing a defensless fly... i'm not going to kill myself right now... maybe tomorow... I look forward to reading more posts... that's what you have to do i guess... find something u want to do tomorow night and just breathe till then.|
|18 Oct 2004||chuds||you are all posers|