|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|04 Aug 2006||mandy||why would you whant to know are you stupid
its not a game for children at all and i will help you call the samaritans you need help your self
|04 Aug 2006||muriel||hi there.
I've read almost all of the messaged that have been posted on this site. Some people approve of this site and others don't, but people will always have different opinions on almost everything.
Ever since i was 12 i have had suicide thoughts. I thought about committing suicide and i even dreamt about it. Now i'm 16 and 2 weeks ago i was so desperate i slitted my wrist. I had had a fight with my boyfriend and i had just received a message on my cellfone, coming from my best friend's parents, telling me that he had died that very night in an accident. after reading that i could no longer think reasonable and i went straight to the kitchen where i picked the biggest and sharpest knife i could find.
the next moment my clothes were covered with blood and so was the floor. I started panicking because this was not like the usual cuts i make. I could not stop crying and my boyfriend wanted to take me to the hospital because i could bleed to death... he was so upset =(
then he bandaged up my wrist so that there would be pressure upon it. 2 hours later i felt very weak and at that moment his dad came home. Luckely for me his dad was a nurse and he stitched my wrist so i didn't have to go to the ER.
The first thing my boyfriend said when he saw all that blood and my wrist that was literally sliced open was that it was over, that he broke up with me. he said he had warned me many times before that one day i would go too far. Afterwards he told me that he had only said those things because he was angry at me at that moment and that he loved me so much and didn't want to lose me.
But still... i was shocked.
shocked by his words and shocked by what i had done. This made me realize i didn't want to die and it's sad that it had to come this far before i realized it =( so please... and i'm saying this to everyone who's reading this right now.. it may look like you have nothing left to live for, but just think that if you're feeling bad now, it can only become better... if you need somone to talk to.. i'm here, you can always add me on msn or send me an email.
I'm not saying i don't want to die anymore, because i still do and i don't know if those thoughts will ever fade completely, but all i can do is try.
i'm thinking of all of you.
-*x*- muriel -*x*-
|04 Aug 2006||x becky x||i dont know wot the best way 2 kild urself when ue under 13 but i am 14 abd i have tryrd 2 cut my wrists an took 3 overdoses of ibprofen and i am stiil here i would take it with alchohol but i underage and try 2 het sleeeping piils they wony sell me them i have dpnt know wot 2 do ifany 1 lives in Glas go leave a message and get boze i can leave my crap life|
|04 Aug 2006||the angel of death||i am 13 and 2 of my friends have commited suicide i have been self harming for over a year now, i have been hospitalised twice, just before i started self harming i was anorexic and since i got over that i needed to hurt! i needed to feel pain. i deserve this pain, i am not going to comit suicide because i don't deserve to die, i deserve to live on in pain for the rest of my life, i can't explain why i feel like this. i think it is because i let 2 of my friends die. i didn't realise something was wrong with either of them!
i should have realised but because i didn't i deserve all the pain i caused
paul and jennys pain that they were living with, the pain that everyone felt after they died id now my pain and my punishment!! i want to die but i can't i need this pain to rid myself of the guilt but i need the pain for selfishly ridding my self of the guilt that i deserve
|04 Aug 2006||there is a light at the end of the tunnel||there is no best way to commit suicide!
i am 13 so i know that you are probably thinking that a 13 year old doesn't have a clue what she is talking about but in the past 8 months two of my best friends have commited suicide! i don't know why they did it but i do know that i will never forget either of them and how it felt for me to loose them, at first when paul killed himself it wouldn't sink in then when it did i became severly depreesed and started self harming then i was angry with paul for leaving me then i tried to kill myself but my friend jenny helped me through it and i became happy again and forgave paul and made my peace with him, i got on with life and it was ok fr a while but then 3 weeks ago i found out that jenny had killed herself aswel, now i can't cope i have started self harming again and feel exactly the same as i did when paul died but know jenny has gone there is no one to help me!
what i m trying to say is no matter how bad things get suicide is not the answer because you leave everyone else feeling 10 times worse than you did before you comited suicide!!!
|03 Aug 2006||Terri||Further thought on the subject...
There are many way in which to commit suicide, some are much more effective than others. To list them here would be incredibly irresponsible of me. Those who are serious about taking their own lives will be able to find all the information they need elsewhere on the internet. Trust me, I've looked numerous times.
I used to want to kill myself.
Sometimes I still do.
However, dealing with the aftermath of my Grandad's suicide changed my view on the whole thing.
My sister having cancer also prevents me from acting upon my thoughts. How can I throw my life away when she is fighting so hard to keep hers?
Doesn't stop me from injuring myself though. What a loser I can be!
CHEESECAKE AND OTHER ANIMALS WILL COME TO HAUNT YOU IN YOUR WAKING NIGHTMARE.
I wish I'd never admitted that I was right.
|03 Aug 2006||N/A||i have read your story and i want to teLL you i bet your not as ugLy as me!
I wiLL teLL you why?
PeopLE have always judged me by my apperance! and actions!
If i go out shopping i have had peopLe Burp in my face, Start there car upon me on purpose, and
PeopLe in my family Are ashamed of me and i don't know what to do about it anymore!
( dam i did not know i was so ugly) i have had people laugh at me,
i have had people look at me funny, when i have been shopping that is how bad looking i am.
I will tell you some thing, when i was a teenager i has someone backstab me and told this boy i fancied
him ( when i did not) he laughed and said what that really ugly girl who has nasty hair...!!!!!!!!
I have also never had a real friend or relationship with anyone!
Also once when i was at a computer once i was typeing to a boy pretending to be someone i was not and
they came down the computer room and they wanted to know who this person was then some boy said HA HA HA HA ITS HER!
tHEN I said no that person is not me then they beileved me and left!!!
so thats how much of a loser i am to other peoople,
When i see other people with pretty kids i just want to die!
And how i have to be such a loser with no life! i cant understand why i am here alive!!
i have been buLLied sort of in a way for being a uglt loser On this planet!
I am pointless being here,really!
So what can i do?????? nothing so there you go, and i bet i can make everyone feel better with this story!
I do go alone with what people tell me becasue i know i am ugly! And if i was pretty i would not be wasteing my time on line
in the summer wrtieing this would i??
Also i have had people stir troulbe asking do you like her, and they said NO!
i JUST am the biggest freak around! and actions..
i look like a ugly boy when i am A 25 YEAR OLD LADY!
i even have been in shops and had females laugh at me and be nasty to me!
Also i have had people in othe shops serve me be rude towrads me!
so what can i do since i am a full grown adult with ugly features!
So whats going to happen to me.
I have had people push me in the back anf treatme like shit!
But i don't think its bullying i think its because i am a loser!! to everyone around me!
i hate going places now i still do but i don't enjoy going placed these days because of all the shit
behaviour i get!
I once had someone stick there finger up at me in the street passing by me in a lorry!
Also people um have just given me dirty looks, i remember once when i went to see some one i was given dirty looks to!
the best way to kill yourself would be to STAB your self in the heart!
|03 Aug 2006||CT||Seriously I'm 18 Ithink I might have mouth cancer I chewed for two years havent in 8 months but this isnt the fist time I questioned life I've triend to commit suicide twice but each time realized the importance of life.... I sit here now crying in my bed on my laptop because I dont know what to do but if I can tell you nything it is not to give up! I will live until my time comes! Wait until you experience something like me. Living every day afraid to tell your parents and family feeling as if I want to chop my lip off. I pray every day that its not true (I have friends that claim to have the bumps in their lip too) but dont let it happen. I'm going into college next year 25 credits ahead and have already taken calculus 3. I played varsity hockey at a huge school and couldve played soccer but quit due to a marijuana addiction. Drugs and alcohol are my only way out of this nonsense. What I am trying to explain is that every person in my city (about 60000) want to be just like me. Little do they know my secret. My main point is that no one knows what comes after life and it is not worth it to risk it! i actually think this is a website designed to make people tell their stories which is why I will not give you my email or name but if it is legit... DONT DO IT! I may have cancer yet am too afraid to tell people but im still goin... wait. i forgot to tell you that the week i was ready to tell my parents my dad took us out to dinner... at the end of dinner he proceeded to tell my sister and i that 3 weeks earlier he had been diagnosed with prostate cancer! shit hits ya but push it out of the way and recognize the gift that has been given to you! Have a good night and take this to your heart because i am the only one not talking about a friend... this is my life abd I know exactly what you are talking about|
|03 Aug 2006||Burnt, Scalded, Scarred and NOT DEAD||Guyz, i am somebody who doesn't matter in the part of the world where i live, but that doesnt matter. Even i want to die, but what is point? The real question is do ya really wanna die? if so, why can't i ever work up the gutz to do so? Well, it is simple, yes or no for the question 'Do i really wanna die?'... but for the question 'why can't i work up the gutz to do so?', it is slightly more complicated. Everyone thinks about, you may not think so but they DO, why, because they r going through a rough time, and sumtimes they r serious enough (like u all and me) to look for how to die. but the answer is that everybody has a self concious part that takes over when doing sumthing bad to yourself, and to actually commit suicide, you would have to work for weeks (and practice really hard) to boost your will power. once u do that u can join the list of ppl who commited suicide (like the man who jumped onto the rails at Penrith station, Sydney...(btw, i dun live there, i heard it in the news)). If anyone needs someone to talk to...im here.... and tho my name is different, i have posted tonnes of times. And all the ppl that wanna commit r dumb, they say u r selfish, arrogant, but in their on self concience mind, they came here to find out how to die. I shouldn't be telling u this, but believe it or not, im only 14, how i know this? i have suffered for soooo long and have learnt through thousands of the hardest ways and am hoping u dun have to learn the same and the hard way.i worked for years to get my will power and i lit myself on fire, what good did that do, i just ended up in hospital for 2 years with damn aching burns, all for what?? i didnt even die?? just relax and ease the pain by talking on this site. and i dun mind if u thro insults at me but the true appreciation comes from ur heart to mine. PEACE TO YA HEART!! Farewell, ill keep posting and i hope i have helped ease atleast a small amount of ur pain. and i think ill use this same name from now on. PEACE OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!|
|02 Aug 2006||UGLY PEOPLE SHOULD KILL THEM SELFS!!
Beauty is in the eye fo the beholder
Well this beholder sees no beauty
All I see is ugly people
Ugly face plain and simple
Ugly hair, ugly noses, ugly teeth
Ugly people, is even ugly the way they breath
Ugly bodies, ugly eyes, ugly stare
Ugly people look ugly everywhere
Ugly people think ugly
Ugly people even smell funny
God don't like ugly people why should we
Ugly people should find another place to live
Ugly people should wear a mask with a pretty face
That way the rest of the world would be spare form the
Ugly look of their face
Ugly people are so vicious
Ugly people do things that are so ridiculous
Ugly people are so stupid
Ugly people will never get struck by the arrows of cupid
Ugly people should just die
Ugly people are the reason is so scary to be alive
Ugliness is somthing you can't hide
Ugliness is not physical but how you are on the inside.
UGLY PEOPLE PUT PEOPLE OFF THERE FOOD!!
DIE DIE DIE DIE!!
|02 Aug firstname.lastname@example.org||mouchette you are sick. why are you sending me sick emails with rude pictures your minging|
|02 Aug 2006||GOD**<<||onli a crazy bitch would wanna die at the age of thirteen now forteen on the other hand might be ok but onli if your name is jon Carmona the third and then it would be ok to kill yourself because your worthless and no one likes you other then someone very stupid named sara but if your anyone else dont do it you can meake a difference and not be worthless so dont commit suicide because i know everything anf its not the right thing to do and yes thATSmeans im and....GOD**<<|
|02 Aug 2006||Robbo||i think u are sick the older people that write on here should not be telling youngesters thats its a good thing to end thier life, it not you only get 1 chance at life and its not worth throwing it away. we all have problems its just finding your own way to deal with them.
who ever runs this site i hope the police catch u and lock u up for a very long time!!!!!
|02 Aug 2006||sas||Precious
You have chosen to open my book
In my mind you are taking a look
You have opened it up costing me to bleed
Bleed these words written in my plead
These words are written in my blood
My blood is black
black absorbed from dark hollowness inside me
So as you read this momentous book
Just remember I put my hart into it
Take good care of it please
The salty liquid falls down my cheek
Falling down as I follow
I have fallen from my peak
And now my tears will shed as my eyes leak
Leaking till theres nothing left
Till all I am is depressed
Everybody went and alone I was left
Left alone shrivelling into nothingness
The nothingness that leaves a hole in your heart
But for me nothing is ripping me apart
Tearing and ripping and pulling away
As Im screaming and crying and shouting for help
But help is too busy to care for my needy soul
So I must wait
Wait for nothing
I have a present it is for me
I have a present
I wonder what it could be
It could be a toy troll
Or it could be a doll
It could be paint to put o my face
It could be a pretty necklace
It could be a game that uses dice
It could be some money for something nice
I have a present
It is for me
I wonder what it could be
I guess Ill have to wait and see
I dream of being fed
I dream of a shelter over my head
I dream of sleeping in a bed
I dream of clothes to wear
I dream for someone to care
I dream of a nice warm fire light
I dream of ending this fight
I pray to the sky
But my prayers are too weak to fly that high
Im so skinny my ribs stick out of my skin
Im so weak my lip sinks down to my chin
Im so empty I cant even cry
I wish I could just die
I did it to let my feelings out
I did it to prove my existence
I needed to open a door
A door that would let out all the shit Ive taken in
I need to occupy myself
I need to take my mind away from my depressing thoughts
I need to feel it
To feel the pain of my flesh being ripped apart
And my insides flowing out of it
I need to now I still have insides although I feel empty
I did it to let my feeling out
I did it to prove my existence is reel
So I know Im not already dead
So I know there is still a chance you dont exist after you die
So I know I can end this
I am going to die
But I do not want you to cry
My presents is with you though its hard to find
Just think in my piece of mind
And the mystery will soon unwind
Murdered my best friend
My heart is suffering
Fighting to keep blood pumping through my veins
Fighting to keep me alive
The only thing that stood with me throughout my whole existence
Without it I could not love nor hate
It exists only inside me
And its dying as a result of my actions
But still I dont peep
I just sit
Watching the blood dribble out of my wrist
As my companion desperately pumps it
But it just exits through my skin and onto the floor were I lay
Fresh blood created and waisted
Just like the life I received
It was given to me to nurture
And I abandoned it
I dont deserve to exist
And so I must move on
My heart and soul must separate
And so we will stay cold and lifeless forevermore
These words dont mean anything
These words written in black
Black like the way I feel
But black doesnt sum it up
These words cannot tell you how I feel inside
They cant show you the black flames
That burn beneath my skin
They cannot make you understand
These words mean nothing
The sun reveals a lot
As it hovers over our blackness
The blackness that it covers up
Leaving only whats underneath
Giving us no choice but to look below
As it shines so bright in a attempt to hide itself
So ask yourself when the sun rises over the dark
Is it revealing or hiding?
Have you heard the one why did the chicken cross the road?
He was sick of being called a chicken
Every day he would sit alone
While everyone else would smoke and talk on there mobile phone
Theyd do all stupid and daring things
While he was smart and didnt risk doing a thing
his smartness led him to being alone
While chicken was called out in a bullied tone
So he took a step out of bounds
And splattered everywhere he was found
The bullies now respect him more
But its too late
His wings were clipped and now his gone
I sit up as I drown
In the tears of my friend
And I pat her on the back
These words are not that of my heart
They are the words of my empty soul
Scrolling its hovering hand over this thickless piece of paper
As he writes
As my soul writes these words
He sobs tears of nothingness
Tears from an empty being
Tears that cannot be known
Cannot be seen
He writes about the pain he holds
Unable to unclench his fist
As he deals with the hate as well
He writes about his thoughts
And how he is unable to work them out with the lack of a brain
He writes about the hollowness he feels
Not that of being organelles but that of being empty
The place inside him that is hollow like the others but not alike
This place is reserved not for needs but for wants
It is reserved for his true self
The place inside him for him to keep
The place that is not taken up by organs
The place inside him for a soul
These are the words of my soulless soul
Open your eyes and you will see
The life beyond you and me
Nobody knows what they truly are
They could come from near
They could come from far
They could be living things
Or they could be spirits with wings
They could be my hallucinations
Or just my imaginations
Or the cold be more real then you and me
People dieing al the time
Leaving only the faintest shadows behind
But the light that hovers overs over us all
Disguises these shadows
So only the people with the widest eyes
Can see that this world is not so nice
They can see the fear that this world holds
And the tears that this world cries
You can see these tears if you look out from peers
You cant see how far it goes
For nobody truly knows
A salty pond is more than enough
But a world full is just too much
We can help if we actually try
To teach this world not to cry
Instead of letting yourself worthlessly die
All you need to do is open your eyes
It doesnt even mater if you are blind
Just open your eyes
And you will see
The shadows that lay there waiting to be seen
My tears are not like yours
They are not see through
My tears dont pore from my eyes
Its because my tears are not cries
Just because its not crying
Doesnt mean they dont follow the same lead
My tears still represent sadness
But they also represent hate
My tears are not like yours
But I wish they were
Footsteps that travel in pair
Over here and also there
Footsteps scattered everywhere
Footsteps implying feet have been there
Feet that are fat
Feet that are thin
Feet that are long
Feet that are short
Theyre all imprinted in our land
Uniquely placed in mud and sand
Travelling with your every move
Racing with you leaving a trail of hooves
Theyve followed you through good times and bad
Theyre your memories
Happy and sad
They have been beneath you all the way
So if you fall theyd catch you any day
They are your imprints in the world
They will always last
They are you memories
They are your past
My quest for love is nearly done
For I think I have found the one
She is really sweat and extremely neat
She really makes my heart beat
God if I am wrong
Make my life short not long.
Step by step
Last night I cut myself
It wasnt very deep
Last night I cut myself
I couldnt get to sleep
Today I cut myself
I went into a deadly sleep
Tomorrow I will cut myself
My life is soon complete
This is my poem
I dont care what you think
I dont care if you like it
I dont want you to change it
It is my poem
You cant tell me how to make it better
You cant tell me that it is wrong
You dont know what I think
You dont know what it is to me
This is my poem
It contains my mind, my heart, and my memories
It is my poem
And that is what it shall remain
I have a place inside me
It has no organs
Though its not empty
It is full of soul
A peace of glass
From the mirror that she once stared into
A puddle of blood
From the heart that once was full
Pail blue lips
On the face we deceived to be colourful
She fenced her face with a smile
We never noticed the other side
We never looked over the other side or ever cared enough to do so
She was our friend
The sound of black
I hear something
It scares me
I scream for help
But no sound
I cry in my own thought
I fear what will happen next
I hear footsteps moving closer
But all I can see is black
Now everything is red
Red dark evil liquid forced out of my veins and through my skin
Then clear sparkly flowed melting from my eyes and trickling down my fair skin
As all the good and evil are drained out of me for it is all I am and without it I am no more
You made it
You took the lead
You got taught
You got torn
And now youre gone
Now everything for you a nurse has to do
It was all you
Express your feelings
They all say
Let it out
But I do
So they dont know
I let my blood run loose
I express my inner feelings
I show my inner self
I watch myself escape
I watch as I run down my arm
I suffer severely
I cant handle the ropes of this world strangling my neck slowly killing me
Everyday I wake up and remember my existence
Witch I tried so hard to forget the night before
Everyday the same
Everyday the worst of them all
Everyday I try to part the arms of god further
To tighten the ropes secured around my neck
But I am nothing next to the being of he
I am nothing
And nothing I can do
So I am forced to live on as an invisible being
And wait to suffocate
Poison can fill my mind, my brain
On my lips it can leave a stain
It can flow through every vein
It is something my heart will maintain
But my blissful soul will stay sain
Tears are running down my cheek
Slowly trickling towards my hart
My heart gradually breaking as the tears get nearer
Blood rapidly pumping out of it as it disintegrates into nothingness
The blood turning rock hard and ice cold as it flows out of my soulless body and onto the flour
For I have no purpose
Knocked out and won
He stood there
Without a care
Just an evil stare
The bell went dang
His fist went bang
Into his opponents ribs it sang
His opponent then got him in the jaw
He let out a huge roar
You could tell he wanted more
He tried to get him back
But that freed his ribs and wack
Then all off a sudden the fight was on
He started throwing punches that were so random
It was like he switched off but at the same time on
It was like he turned into a lion without claws
Or a bear that stout on all fours
It was like pouf and he was a Wolfe
I miss your kiss
I miss your smile
I miss the way you act
I miss the way you keep in tact
I miss your thick long strands of hair
I miss the way youd always care
I miss your fun yet responsible set of mind
I miss the way your presence shined
I miss the nice warm hugs you gave
I miss our cozzie cave
But most of all
I miss you
His family is a drunken mess
His only friend is his dog Tess
His left to run the house alone
He has to earn money and pay for their home
He eats cheep scraps every day
He wants to leave but has to stay
He sits in bed every night
And cuts himself with a knife
Not enough to kill himself
But enough to take away the pain of everything else
Now he had to give his only friend away
He sits and prays to find a way
But every way he turns is black
Now his boss has given him the sack
Now he lives on the street
And eats thrown away meat
He cannot deal with the pain any more
His heart is so empty and sore
He cries one tear
And cuts himself for the very last time
Now he lays in the alley way
In the dark
No one knows or cares
They just walk past
I like bear
It takes away my tear
It signifies my fear
I like bear
Last night I cut myself
It didnt really hurt
It takes my mind of my brain
And puts it on the pain
It wont stop bleeding though
I guess I cut it really low
In my blood I see my reflection
I watch myself as I go
I woke up in the hospital
Told every one I fel
Last night I cut myself
But nobody knows
Today I cut myself
Now it really shows
Going going going gone
He new it was coming
He was running
Running running running away
Running away from his memories
Drifting drifting drifting thither
Drifting thither apart
Drifting away from his heart
Fading fading fading absent
Fading into nothingness
Sinking sinking sinking deeper
Sinking in his tears
Sinking in his fear
She shed a tear
Of what is yet to come
Horror, fear, and sadness all trickling down my cheek
As in the mirror I take a peak
My blue eyes gazed upon themselves
Then they slowly wondered towards my wrist
Were I hold a sharp razer blade in my fist
With one flick of her wrist
She slit her wrist
Blood pouring out
Pouring into the mist
She didnt even gloat
All she did was hope
Hope she didnt have to spent
One more minute praying to the pope
She could not take the pain
That filled her brain
Then with her last glance
Fixated on a tree branch
Her head tilted to the side
Her eyes open wide
But just before she passed off dead
A little grin shed
The syringe of the cold winter wind
The sniff of the particles in he air
The unique leaves covering the garden
The high of being exhausted
The drug of life
Hair covering her soft beautiful face
Why dues she covers up such beauty?
Maybe she doesnt want you to be deceived by the glow se tries so desperately to hide
Maybe she wants you to know the pain
She wants you to see the darkness that the glow hides
Maybe she hides her outside so you can see in
Im sitting in a concrete room
It has no door
Just a curtained wall
The room is also very small
Im sitting in a concrete room
I call it my home
In my home I sit and wait
Wait to leave this home
Wait to find a different home
A home were I am free to roam
Im sitting in a concrete room
Dreaming of a place
A place on a nice landscape
A colourful place
Were on the grass I can sit and laze
And watch the sun rise
Im sitting in a concrete room
I am crying tears in this concrete room
Tears in fear of what is to come
Im sitting in a concrete room
I lift the can up to my mouth
And tilt it upwards
Forcing the fizz to slide down my mouth
It flows in
Drowning my tastebuds in its playful taste
I swish it round to spread the flavour
Then let it voluntarily slide down my throat
I feel it run through my veins
I feel excited and odd
Like two wrongs that making what feels right
Like a sort of abnormal abnormal
I look at my hands
I dont see them
I see pours
I am turning into a bear
A red bear
Oh have a cry
From your eye
Im crying too
But Im not crying with you
Wile you sit there and cry
Just remember Im the one who may die
Because you bombarded me with your bullied thoughts
And swelled up my hate
Which led me to the razor blade
You blocked away my light
Ive fought with you with all my might
But now I am too weak to fight
Your horrid words punctured my heart
Leaving me to bleed
Shedding my blood till I am drained
For it is the only thing left
You took my confidents and happiness away
And now youre taking my heart
My most important part
Without my heart I do not work
It is my engine
Now I am gone
You rejected my soul
Now I am just a shadow in the dark
Why did this happen to me?
Why am I so empty?
Why cant I make any friends?
Why cant I go to sleep?
Why did I run away?
Why am I so ugly?
Why cant I change?
Why am I holding a razer in my hand?
Why did this happen to me?
Why did I do this to me?
I have received a gift
A generous gift
A gift to take care of
A gift to have fun with
A gift to treasure
But I dont want it
It is the gift of life
All bottled up
Full of harm waiting to happen
Slowly decaying past its used by date
When broken so sharp and feared
A jail for its insides
A jail that is locked until someone opens it
I lay there
Eyes sealed shut
My family around me
Telling m stories
It is my funeral
I cut myself
I need to reassure that I am still alive
I need to know that blood still runs through me
Even though it may not be pure
I need to feel my pain to prove to myself I still have feelings
I need to show myself I am not a wuss
And that I can feel and bleed
And I am alive
Even though many people think not
My soul awaits a meaning
It waits for a purpose to exist
It has no reason to be
As it lets itself drown in to forgotten
|01 Aug 2006||jenny||Hi there I'm back. I don't think my other answer got posted but anyway I have some things to say.
First of all did you know that your family will be the one cleaning up after you? If you make a mess, they'll be the one cleaning out your brains from the corners, and pulling the drain and then washing the bloody bathtub you left behind. Someone has to do it, and NO, cleaning companies will NOT do it for you. That's all for this part.
Now if you want to kill yourself, be considerate. Remember you're hurting your family by doing this, might as well not make them clean up after you. Anyway last time I posted a lot of tips about killing yourself, but apparently it wasn't posted. So yeah. Here is a tip though.
Tylenol/Aspirin : Don't overdose on this, or you will get liver damage and die an agonizing death in a few weeks. Which sucks. Some won't mind I guess. It's very hard to save a person from this, as you will most likely need a liver transplant. You have to take very large amounts of this although I'm not sure how much exactly. If you really want to swallow pills, take prescription pills. A large amount. Most will kill you, just try to do some research on the web before.
|01 Aug 2006||Ivan||I have no idea all i know is that i encourage it im not a 100% sure why even i want to do it. its not even that i have a bad life its pretty good actually i use o be very happy but now every day looks much two similar to the last i dont have any goals its not like i dont have people that love me, i have good parents realy good friends and an even better boyfriend,its just that life seems so falible i dont even know why i was givin life,i guess im just bored with every aspect of my life im not sure its worth it to stomach another day.Idont want to kill myself i just dont see what alternative i have other to see whats on the other side|
|01 Aug 2006||Terri||1.Suicide hotline number e.g. Samaritans
2.Chocolate (makes eveyone feel better)
3.Number of a close friend.
4.A few stories written by the families of those who have commited suicide.
Anyone who wants to "play" suicide needs to seek help. It's not again and it destroys more than one life.
x x x
|01 Aug 2006||Privat||Actually, just buy a school tie, head down to the park, get a tree, and something to stand on, tie the tie to the tree and firmly around your nech, kick the stool over and ride free. But make sure that the tie has a bit left so your neck breaks when you kick the stool - painless. I have alot of pain. I have been pushed about, I have been bullied, I have no friends - just a girl and a get endless headaches everday. I have trouble sleeping and I am missing a big gap in my life - my grandad, who i had to see die. :-'(|
|01 Aug 2006||walter||man all u people sayen dat this site is bad then why the fuk are u on here go bak 2 ur normal lives us people on here are depressed we read and think SHIT there is someone worse off than me so go back to ur lives and leave us alone we will do wat the fuk we want ok so im nearly done and if a kid is looking on this site they need help and we are herE
SO IF U GOT A PROBLEM WITH WAT I SAY ADD ME AND ILL HAPPILY ARGUE WITH U
BUT FOR THOSE KIDS WHO WANT SOME ONE TO TALK 2 ADD ME I CAN HELP
|31 Jul 2006||a somebody whos a nobody||im 13 and i have cut myself 16 times becuase some how i think its good for me. they weren't big cuts just little ones except for one. i told my family that they were just cat scratches. ive told so-called-friends that i was going to commit suicide and only one believes me or at least cares about me. she told the counsler at school and i got called down to her office durring first hour. my counsler at school was also my basketball coach for 7th grade (i guess shes going to be the 8th coach next year too, so i get to see more of her, which isnt a bad thing neccessarly) so she knew me pretty well. all the time that i was in her office i just kept thinking how stupid and retarded it was, and how that isnt like me to be in the counslers office. so she asks me questions and more questions. and finally we were done and i went back to class. but than later that day she had a counsler from outside of the school come to talk to me. it sucked. the whole time i was wondering what my mom would say or if she would say anything after i got home from school and she got home from work. that night she didnt say anything about that topic, but in the morning after she dropped my sister off at school she asked if i knew who told my counsler i did but i said that i didnt and she left it at that. a couple days later i was called down to her office again and she asked how talking to the outside counsler was. and really it was stupid because what did she expect me to say that it was great and the best thing the happened to me, it wasnt it was one of the most uncomfortable things because i hate talking to people about my problems i keep them locked inside of me. so she let me go. than a couple more days passed and while i was in gym she came in a talked to my gym teacher and after we were done with the activity my teacher told me to go to the counsling office to see mrs. schippers. this time she asked me what i thought about outside counsling. when she asked me this it made me feel like i was a crazy maniac who wanted to die so bad. i didnt say much (like usuall). it sucks to know that ur mom, sister, friends, and basketball coach know that you want to commit suicide because i think that they think im going to do it at any time, when i know im not because i dont have the guts or a plan on how to do it. and that totally sucks. its been a couple of months since i talked to my coach since its the summer, and once i get back to school i know that shell call me down sooner or later, so ill be waiting for it. i just hope i dont snap some day and actually do it because ive never tried and honestly i dont really want to right now (but i know thats goin to change). so i hope none of u snap either.
~a somebody whos a nobody~