|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|24 Nov 2000||gm9||Are the ways are supposed to be different for a 13 years old? But maybe you could commit suicide in a Toys-R-us, by a bloody way, like making a deep cut in your neck from one ear to the other with a razorblade (or a very sharp knife). With this way, they would speak of you on CNN.|
|21 Nov 2000||chris||Get a houseboat on the canals of Amsterdam and dress sleazy. Then do rude things to your customers, you know, really rude things, they will kill you. It is sort of like suicide.|
|19 Nov 2000||Melody Lovejoy||With the Christmas season arriving, you could create a memorable holiday by hanging yourself from the tree. Maybe tie a card around your wrist, and hang mistletoe from your mouth? Your mom won't forget this one!|
|17 Nov 2000||Christopher Cohen Haffly||You're a complete lunatic if you think I'm going to potentially incriminate by 1) contributing the deliquency of a minor and 2) assisting in suicide. Freedom of speech does not extend to the transmission of criminal data and, fortunately or unfortunately depending on how you look at it, attempting suicide is illegal.|
|31 Oct 2000||christophegerbault.com||you make your guinea pig almost starving to death ( for 1 or 1 and a half week). Then you put your tiny little head in the cage in order to kiss it.|
|02 Oct 2000||christ||stab yourself in the head with big ass knives. straight through your skull. then if that doesn't work eat mom's pills. lots of them. munch'em down.|
|02 Oct 2000||coatner||There is no best way. You are better off if your pray to God. Pray to the Father in Jesus Christ's name. Ask for salvation, understanding, and deliverence. Read the Holy Bible.
Don't let Satan fool you as he is always trying to do. Trust in our Heavenly Father. Ask Him for help in Jesus Christ's Name. Watch Out! Do not let Satan deceive you. Satan wants you to destroy yourself; don't let Satan defeat you. Get into God's Word, the Holy Bible. Study the Holy Bible from the Hebrew and Greek manuscripts. Learn about the Truth. The is only one of you. God made only one of you. You are very special to Him.
Turn to God; He loves you. He wants your love. You are one of His Children.
|25 Sep 2000||Çhriß||To go to the pixelated cat and DO NOT KILL IT. IT WILL EVENTUALLY KILL YOU. Even though you didn't kill yourself, you let something else kill you. It's kinda like suicide?|
|02 Sep 2000||Mr Tug||Melt down some crayons in the microwave. Pretend its hot cider at daddy's lawyer christmas parties.
Pretend it doesn't burn.
With a wax coating covering the insides of your throat swallow several boxes of safety pins, thumb tacks and razor blades.
Wait. (This could be the boring part. Be sure to have a good book or friend to keep you company while you wait to die.)
|07 Jul 2000||J Graham||As this originated on your Christmas page - listen to what Jesus said: "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."
John 10:10 That is THE Christmas present!
|03 Jul 2000||christof||hmmm... jumping from a high tower, the tour eiffel. and leaving a letter: 'i can see the world dying. and i wonder you don't'|
|31 May 2000||Christian||get run over by your own parents|
|10 May 2000||Chris Wright||look at yourself in the mirror|
|24 Apr 2000||chrisis||First of all, you have to keep in mind that the closer you are to 13, the quicker you'll have to die, otherwise you'll not have killed yourself when you're under 13. Based on this, you can have different suicide kits for different ages.
Of course children must be over 3 years old, because the kit may contain small (possibly hazardous) parts. The kits range from "the third birthday kit" (very slow death: self induced terminal illness, etc.) to "the day before 13th birthday kit"
(very quick death: common gunshot, wound to head, etc...). The kits in between are the most fun, because they're noticable from the beginning, and still last long enough to enjoy!
|13 Apr 2000||christian||Becoming sexually curious, shoving mother's vibrator up your rectum, and dying of internal bleeding.|
|06 Apr 2000||Godpoet||Speak Death and it happens. Be God and come back.
What better for Christmas present past-and-future?
|05 Apr 2000||Chris||Take lots of ibuprofen. About 30 tablets of 200mg each. The ibuprofen will not kill you, but it will give you the whole excitement of being taken to hospital.. getting fed liquid charcoal (which tastes nice) and generally getting the whole near-death experience with none of the pain.|
|13 Feb 2000||Christine||If you want to make a mess, force yourself to vomit over and over until you finally get the bile left in your stomach that burns your throat. Then keep on barfing. You will probably die.|
|26 Jan 2000||Chris||Pretend to be an adult.|
|20 Dec 1999||JULIE ELLISON AND TAYLOR JEWELL HENSLEY||The 101 Best, Most Clever, and Most Disturbing Ways to Kill CREATED AND PRESENTED BY:
~JULIE ELLISON AND TAYLOR JEWELL HENSLEY~
C 1999 Happy Days Inc.
1. Slit your wrists.
2. Drink cleaning supplies.
3. Put your dad's rifle in your mouth and shoot.
4. Cut yourself along several major arteries and slowly bleed to death.
5. Fill the bathtub up with hot water and get in. Go underwater & breathe until I say stop.
6. Give yourself a homemade tattoo with toxic silver pen.
7. Fill the bathtub up. Grab a toaster & plug it in. Get in the bathtub and bring the toaster with you. Push down the button & enjoy!
8. Boil several gallons of water on the stove and "accidentally" spill it all on yourself.
9. Bash your head in with a hammer.
10. Get an axe from the woodpile & split yourself in half.
11. Use your telekinetic powers to make the house fall apart.
12. Tease the elevator by not letting it close until it buzzes loudly. Stand in the door's way and let it close.
13. Break a mirror. Take two sharp pieces of the glass and shove them in your eyes, hard and deep.
14. Shove a Chef's knife up your butt.
15. Kill someone else and plead for death by lethal injection.
16. Break a bottle of wine on a table and shove it in your stomach.
17. Have your best friend run you over with a steamroller.
18. Turn on the iron until water dances on surface. Put it on several places on your body, keeping it in each place for at least 45 seconds.
19. Jump off a building, aiming carefully to impale yourself on a lamppost.
20. Drive a wooden stake in your heart.
21. Induce vomiting until you black out and slip into a coma. This coma should last for several months, in which time your family will certainly decide to pull the plug.
22. Put your pinky, as well as any other digits that will fit, into an electrical socket.
23. Purposely catch your clothing in the escalator at a local mall and fight off anyone who tries to help. Enjoy the ride!
24. Swallow vanilla bath beads.
25. Drop a lit match down your throat.
26. Eat three tubes of toothpaste - and I'm not talking about trial size.
27. Hang yourself in your closet with an electrical cord.
28. Unbend a coat hanger and slowly & carefully shove it up your nose.
29. Crash a car into a department store window displaying a nativity scene. Merry Christmas!
30. Lodge your head in the toilet bowl and flush mercilessly.
31. Get your hand caught in the CD-ROM drive and attempt to cut it off with a dull pocketknife.
32. Make a pipe bomb and blow up your house with you inside, of course.
33. Stuff toilet paper down your throat until you choke.
34. Eat baby powder.
35. Eat deodorant.
36. Take a walk in the ghetto with a giant boom box blasting Vanilla Ice.
37. Anger a cannibal.
38. Drown yourself in a spoon full of water.
39. Get a friend to throw a few CDs Frisbee-style at your stomach and throat.
40. Swallow fifteen razor blades.
41. Drink 2 bottles of cough syrup.
42. Lock yourself in a room. After you've eaten the carpet and peeled the paint off the walls for a snack, you'll eventually starve.
43. Swerve into the left rear wheels of a moving transfer truck on your bike.
44. Break a battery open and pour it into a glass of Dr. Pepper and drink it.
45. Live on top of an active volcano.
46. Piss off O.J. Simpson.
47. Eat a string of Christmas Tree lights.
48. Give yourself a million paper cuts--if the paper cuts don't kill you, the counting will.
49. Nail yourself to the side of a federal building.
50. Scalp yourself. If you're not dead, make photocopies.
51. Cry your eyes out:literally.
52. Burn plastic and breathe in the toxic fumes.
53. Charge into a big screen TV.
54. Lag behind when participating in a Bull Run.
55. Walk around in downtown New Jersey with a Target store shirt on.
56. Smash your head in the safe door again & again & againÉ
57. Spray a bottle of air freshener up your nose and inhale at the same time.
58. Eat a dog with heartworms raw.
59. Strategically place yourself in the middle of a very busy intersection at rush hour during daylight savings time while wearing a tight, black jumpsuit, being ever so careful to hit every car you see.
60. Go to a horse race and jump out in front of the leading horse screaming at the top of your lungs, "I'm a pony! I'm a pony!"
61. Make like Sonny Bono when on a skiing trip.
62. Get run over by an ostrich.
63. Get naked and lay on 12 150-watt light bulbs, then flip the switch.
64. Cut off all your fingers then write a ten-page report on "Polyester versus Cotton Fabrics" with the stubs.
65. Get pregnant and then have your mother perform an emergency C-section just for kicks.
66. Jam a toothbrush in your bellybutton.
67. Brush your teeth with a MACH 3 razor.
68. Drill a hole in your head.
69. Find a huge pine tree. Cut it down with a chainsaw while standing in its falling path.
70. Skinny-dip in a shark tank with your favorite rubber ducky.
71. Drive with a rabid monkey in your back seat.
72. Play NASCAR with an unsuspecting fellow driver.
73. Jump off the balcony in a school auditorium.
74. Smash your head through a wooden door, making sure you get plenty of splinters.
75. Jump in the way of a moving subway train.
76. Drip hot wax all over your body, then light matches and light your feet on fire. The flames will rise and consume your entire body, but before you do that, make sure you drip hot wax in your eyes & let it harden.
77. Do back flips in a mosh pit.
78. Attempt to leap tall buildings in a single bound.
79. Jump out of a moving bus window and do shoulder-rolls across the highway until you get run over.
80. Always use the wrong tool for the job.
81. Float on your back in the Anaconda River and wait.
82. Get in a pool with piranhas and have them tear off your flesh bit by bit, eating you alive.
83. Wedge yourself in the doggy-entrance on the garage door and have a friend press the "garage open" button.
84. Use a chain saw to cut out pictures.
85. Shove a TV antenna in one ear & out the other.
86. Strangle yourself with your best necklace.
87. Bite your arm and suck & swallow the blood. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.
88. Perform self-quadruple bypass surgery.
89. Take out your own spleen, cook it for 2 minutes in the microwave, and eat it.
90. Cut yourself up and feed as much of you as possible to the family dog.
91. Cut off your limbs and put them in the crock-pot for your family to find. If your crock-pot isn't large enough, put extra flesh in the freezer for later.
92. Swan dive into the 10-gallon fish tank.
93. Give yourself a buzz-cut with bush shears.
94. Gather up a group of friends to push all your pressure points at the same time.
95. Make believe you're in a psychiatric facility with padded walls when you're really in a steel cage.
96. Straddle a neon sign. Don't let go, no matter what people tell you.
97. Go swimming in an oil spill. Don't forget to open your eyes under water!
98. Smash your porcelain "Precious Moments" dolls in the middle of the street and consume the large pieces left over.
99. Roll around nude in the street at noon.
100. Drink paint. Eat the stick you stirred the paint with. Drink paint thinner to wash it down.
101. Take all the pills in your medicine cabinet, along with at least one shot of every alcoholic beverage known to man and take a little nap. Don't bother waking up.