|Reading these suicide pages you will find people seeking help and people offering their help. Some witness about suicide from real life experience, others who play along with me would pretend it's a children's game. Some make sick and cruel jokes about it, and angry people blame me for even mentioning the subject. You might also want to read my favourite answers. If you want your answer to be included here, fill in the form.|
What is the best way to kill yourself when you're under 13?
Quelle est la meilleure forme de suicide pour les moins de 13 ans?
|02 Dec 2004||Religious Maggie||Do you know, I have 2 pairs of lips. Only women have 2 pairs. I suppose with all the talking we do we have to have two. I end up on my back a lot you know my darlings. It happens when the weather is wet outside, and I fall over. I'm a little frail I must admit. My boobs sort of squash against the wet pavement, which I admit is a little exciting.
Oooh it's Advent now isn't it! I have 25 days of poosy stuffing to do. You would love to know what happens at christmas my darlings wouldn't you?
|30 Nov 2004||Religious Maggie||Oh Cryss darling that is so true. When Jesus died on the cross he did indeed have me in mind. My lovely boobs and my holy poosy. I sometimes wonder if I actually deserve God, especially when we sing "What did I do to deserve you?" at church. In my case it means that I am saving myself for the lord. So in saving myself for him I then deserve him.
There's also another song we sing, that goes like this: "Here in the love of Christ I stand". It means with the love of christ I stand erect. But my poosy stands erect too you know my darlings, yes it pushes my knickers foward. Sometimes they split in the middle.
|16 Nov 2004||Uber Fucky aka CeZ||I fucking love this site! Just fabulous. I love the Christian arseholes who tell us that life is worth living, that GOD loves us. It amuses me in my stoned state. Used to come here a lot, and then didn't... no idea why. Haha. But I'm back now to cheer you all up with coffee and cake.|
|09 Nov 2004||Sherry||You have your whole life ahead of you, you should not let anything bother you to where you want to take your life, sure life has bumps, you have heartache, but when yoo committ suicide you are hindering yourself from eternal life. why would you end your life just to burn eternally . if you are a christian i urge you to read your Bible i am sure that there is an answer in there. suicide is not a game this is real. you must wise up and realize that once you committ suicide you can not take it back youre gone your are no more. there are hotlines and peoplae that are willing to help you with your situation.|
|01 Nov 2004||mauvaissouhait||CHRIS, its me again.. mavais and u need to e-mail me at my new name alright? im feeling as tho things are at an end and we need to talk.|
|03 Oct 2004||Temple||Je vais te donner ma recette personnelle, même si elle a échouée pour moi, elle est vraiment belle et amusante à expérimenter. Une aprés midi, il faisait beau, j'étais dans la maison de mes parents, il y avait juste mon frère avec moi j'avais à peu près 14 ans. J'ai regardé par la fenêtre, je me suis aperçue que le vent soufflait dehors, c'était triste et beau, alors j'ai voulu faire une chose triste et drôle : je suis allée chercher la boite du petit chimiste que j'avais eue pour Noël. J'ai commencé à mélanger les produits aux noms les plus impressionnants dans un tube à essai bien propre. Ensuite, je suis déscendue dans la cuisine, le tube à la main. J'ai regardé par la fenêtre, le soleil brillait, les arbres commençaient à perdre leur feuilles, le vent soufflait et j'ai vu mon chat marcher tranquillement sur la terrasse. Alors, j'ai pleuré doucement et j'ai avalé très vite le contenu du tube. J'ai mangé une banane pour que les produits restent dans mon corps et me tuent. Malheureusement, j'ai très vité été prise de vomissements, et alors que j'avais ma tête au dessus des toilettes, mon frère est arrivé effrayé et m'a demendé ce qui m'arrivait. J'avais des larmes sur les joues et je lui ai répondu en riant que je n'arrivait pas à me tuer.|
|22 Sep 2004||Marc Aka Fatherxix||I've already posted my suicidal life story, but I just wanted to say thanx to everybody else that posted, because it put me back in line. When I look at it My problems arent jack shit. I've never been raped before, I've never been beaten before. My only problem is me, and my parents that expect to much of me, I still cut myself, and pray for death, but it might not ever be anything compared y'all. I wanna thank everybody that prayed for me.
One of the things that really makes me want to put a knife to my wrists is all my fuckimg teachers at my perfect ass christian high school. More times than ever, I really just want to bring a uzi into the school and just splatter all the people's blood that ask me why I cut myself (and or wrists) and soak the stupid stuck up bitch slut amy in her stupid bitch friends, and stick the gun up the angel principles ass fire away. the only person who I couldnt kill would be my stupid stuck up brother, only because he's blood. then I would finish the job by taking myself out, and I could rot in hell with everybody who called themselves christians.
That's what life's like through my eyes now
|02 Sep 2004||no hands||Dear Dan Garrett,
Um, I haven't studied your religion in depth (despite laughing at how fucking stupid the bible is) but you say, "Jesus is the one true god"
Um, was that the stupidiest thing anyone could say, or is it just me? I thought that "god" was the one true god and Jesus was his son... uh. I haven't studied gentics, or family planning, in detail, but, I think, basically you are a fucking dick.
But anyway, I hate religious people. Seriously, why don't they take their crap some place else! Did you know that gay people aren't allowed into heaven? That's not bullshit (and I'm not anti-gay in any way, shape or form). My mom was a full on Christian, and she hated those fucking niggers and homos!! Ya'll hear that? You have to be straight to get into heaven! Better watch out ya'll gay and lesbian people trying to get some type of goverment recognition. Uh-uh, you might as well give up, because you are going straight to hell!
I love beating the shit out of religious people, just to get back at them for all that anti-abortion stuff they did. Heheh, that's MY idea of a good night out.
|02 Sep 2004||Jesus Fucking Christ||Fall into Sin|
|31 Aug 2004||valerie||ookay im 15 and yes some of you may have horrible lives.. but honestly all you need to do is pray & i promise something good will come eventually. im 15 and i`ve made sum pretty dumb mistakes and i`ve never been a really big christian which i hope i get to be .. because wenever smething is bad in my life i turn to GOD and he is always there for me.. need anything just email or IM me|
|27 Aug 2004||saul||lock your self in a room and listen to christine aguillera at volume 11 until your head explodes, or maybe thats the worst way.|
|25 Aug 2004||Li Dao||Af ter much thought, and research, I have decided on the "perfect" way that I am going to use to end my life. Why do I want to end it? Well, after countless years od abuse, therepy, prayer, meidication and everything else under the sun, I as a christian since birth, believe that, even at 14, one has the choice and right to end whatever is torturing them in this world and move on to the promises of eternal life in heaven, where there is total peace, contentment and love that I have never had here. For anyone else contemplating finding that peace that I am, here is how I am going to go about it, and recommend you too also.
First I do not want to make it any harder for those that find me then it will be, as if they really care but i know they do to a point. That is why i chose a non violent way like not shooting or hanging myself. What I (you ) need to get for yourself is very simple. A large kitchen drawstring garbage bad is all that is needed. Optionally who may alos want a large outdoor leaf drawstring bag also and maybe a cord or belt.
You can proceed in the cofort of your own bedroom very easily, that is what i will do. Make sure no body is home for at least 1 hour. Ideally a friend would be great to help you out, nut realisitcally not many people are into doing such a thing.
First, you may want to drink a bit of alcohol if you are extremely nervous. This will help you relax and not make mistakes and will also speed up the time you will lose conciousness. Also you may want to take 3-4 over the counter sleeping pills but that is not for me.
Be absolutely sure to go to the bathroom shortly before you end your life. I am not being funny here, as your body dies, you loose control of your function and you do not want to leave a mess for whoever finds you, this is just plain courtesy.
Take the large kitchen draw string bag, and loosely put it over your head to the area of your shoulders and neck. You will have plenty of air to breathe at this timeso it is not a frightening experience. Optionally you can put the large leaf sized drawstring bag over your head also it should come to about your knees.
Next lie down on the bed if you want to or you can sit in a chair,but i want to lie in my bed as i go. again you will still be ableto breathe with the bag not tight so you can lie and reflect,pray or whatever you wish.
When the right time has come for you, sit upright and sinch the bag as tight as you can around your neck, turning your face away from the front of the bag to make it wasier to have your last breaths. Lie back in the bed and DO NOT allow yourself o reach up and loosen the bag as your body starts to crave oxygen.that is why you may want to fasten a belt around the neck to help prevent loosening it. In about 15-20 seconds,you will begin to feel faint and your breathing will be very rapid. If you have used alcohol/sleeping pills this will happen very quickly nonetheless you will begin to pass out. That is ok, just let it happen. you will lose conciousness first and then your dying body will slowly shut down and in about 3-4 minutes you will have finally found the peace that you have so very longed for.
When you are discovered, they will see you exptremely peacefull looking and not gross. All they have to do is remove the bag.If you have someone helping you, have them hold your hand while this is going on until it is over.
I am not crazy or out of my mind. I have been gurenteed a afterleife for which i need to experience, for I have done everything possible to make my life here better. I was never meant to be here. Pleas e-mail if you wish, i will be here for a while yet as the time is not right until about a month. What a joyous reunion waits us who seek heaven. If i can help you with any questions please feel free to ask me. thank you....Li Dao
|22 Aug 2004||Kieren Allen||I have been thinking of suicide for a very long time now. I'm not 13yo, but have suffered with depression since I was at least 4yo. For me there is now little reason or drive to go on with this game called life. After my parents divorced when I was 4yo, I was brought up in 9 different forster homes. I was abused as a kid both sexually and physically by "straight" people who were supposed to protect and look after me. I have had to live with the memories and shame of this all my life! I survived a very violent gay hate attack just before Christmass 2003, after which I was in hospital for 6 weeks. This has cost me my job where I earnt very good money, and has pretty much destroyed my life! I now cannot trust "straight" people at all. I have no family, and few if any friends, no one will really miss me! People should understand that this alone is my choice! I have given it alot of consideration! I have also looked at other options! No one can live my life for me, or solve my problems or take away the fear, panick attacks and nightmares I now have to live with each day. Remember that I said I have no family, and no one will give a damn when I am gone! I am not lying, I won't even have to wright a letter when I end my life. I am not trying to stop you from killing yourself, that alone is your absolute right, and it is your life. But before you decide to end your life, do what I have done, and at least stay around long enough to consider fully the ramifications of your choice! It will be final and absolute! There is no going back, and there will not be a chance for things to get better or even for your loved ones to help you. Think also, long and very hard about who your going to leave behind, and who might find you. Sometimes the pain for those who live on after you are gone is too much for them to bear. They never really forget or get over it! Remember that things can get better. Hard times can pass! "Suicide" is a very permanent solution, to what can sometimes be only a temporary situation! If you have close friends or a family member you can really trust and love, then for God's sake, do the right thing and tell them how you are feeling and ask them for help before it's too late. You owe yourself that much! Remember that suicide is only to ever be considered as a decision of last and absolute final resort. Think about this very carefully, and don't make a quick decision. Give yourself at least "6" months of very careful consideration, and explore "all" other options first. I did! Time can heal, if not help a lot. Remember there is no turning back from such a choice! Quite apart from any thing else, and of extreem importance, you must have the correct information! You simply must know what you are doing! Trust me, you don't want to end up as a vegetable or be totally paralysed with brain dammage! That would be a living hell, and would really piss your loved ones and friends off! If you really want to know how to suicide, then do what I did, check out the "how to" pages on the net. The Hemock society in the U.S is a good start. It is not the only one but be sure to "get it right" and you can even make it painless! If you, like me are pretty much alone in life, and don't have loved ones, then the choice will be that much easier. You still should consider all the other options first! Remember I said I have thought about this for a very long time, and I know that my life is now just too messed up for a real, and happy future! But if you have loved ones, or very close friends, then you owe it to yourself, and them, to seek help before going any further!|
|09 Aug 2004||Go to Jesus Christ in prayer, things will get a lot better if you try.|
|31 Jul 2004||scott||instead of laughing, y doesnt neone do the "christian" thing to do and actually help, u call us sick and u just throw shit and hate our way to make it worse, the sick are not as "sick" as those who abuse the sick, think about it "sicko." u fucking disgust me.|
|20 Jul 2004||email me plz||wow guys i cant believe i lived w/o this site before... jesus christ, i dont even no y i want 2 kill myself so bad, i feel bad for all yall whose lives really do suck and i no im selfish but im just searching for something more but i cant seem to find it... have u ever heard the song mad world by michael andrews?? well thats exactly how i feel... its like okay what the fuck am i doing, school is hard and we're just going nowhere, everything u do it doesnt even matter because ur just gonna die in the end anyway so why wait... y not just do it now and get it over with and spare urself all the shit ur gonna go through in the future... im sry im not trying 2 tell anyone 2 kill themselves, and i dont think its a weak thing 2 do all u fuckers who say that, b/c it takes strength to go through with it, hell, maybe suicidal ppl r the only ones who've got life figured out...plz ppl email me cuz i seriously need 2 talk 2 someone.. yep time to go cut myself, mwa|
|09 Jul 2004||Lil mike||To Angel of Darkness: I stumbled upon this site by pure accident. I read your post earlier in the day and couldn't forget you.. or any of the others. So I had to come back and post to you.. first. I hope I can post to others later. But since yours was the first post i read i will post to you first.And because you have found your calling and dont realize it. Someone relies on you.Wakes up looking forward to seeing you..needs to see you each day. And even says thank God for you.You have found a reason to live because you are special to someone. My parents devorced when i was about 3.I was blessed by getting a saint for a step dad. But when I went to visit my dad it was Hell. Not like any of you went through. At all. Just fighting for my dad through the step mom..step brothers and half sister. My dad always took up for them. Of course.. he had to live with her. But theres alot of pain i still carry for it.But none like all of you feel.When i finally moved with my dad at the age of 14,I only lived there 3 years before he wanted to charge me rent because he was trying to get rent from my step brother who was 21 still living at home.Of course if you go after the step son you have to do the same to your own son. Bull.I moved out.Finally I got my own place and married my high school sweetheart.We have been dating since we were sophmores.Angel of Death.. dont let me loose you with all that yet. I'm getting to what I wanted to tell you. We now have a son who is 17, a senior in high school.He is a god kid. Anyway, I was always raised to help others. And I have tried to do that.And we have taught our son that. About 7 years ago my wife learned that there were 2 kids homes in our small town (pop of about 12,000)small for me since my mom took us to cal when they divorced.It was at Christmas and I'll never forget her crying and saying I dont want anything but to help those kids.Let me side step for a minute. 11 years ago I owned 2 houses a machine shop and built storage buildings in our town. No.. I'm not rich. If one person stopped a months payment we would be in big trouble.Our neibors at the time were not a good influence on my son. So we started looking for a new home. We found a house with 4 acres. When I say it i asked God that if he would let me be able to purchase it I would share it with all the kids that needed love. God answered my prayers. We have helped the kids homes all these years. They are all like you all.They have been abussed,sexually, mentally and phisically. Taken from theirs homes for those reasons. Kids just like you.We love them all so much. We have them over fishing in our pond, took them to a local Country music show where they had a blast, and have even rebuilt a Merry go Round for them at the home. What I'm getting at is this.. ANGEL OF DEATH... You can be ANGEL OF LIFE to that one kid, no more than that one kid... many more. Maybe your calling is to work with kids like you...to comfort them, hug them when they are crying. You know thier pain. Who better to help others send than someone that knows the all the pain first hand. GOD WORKS IN MISTERIOUS WAYS!!!!. I know. Because I am helping kids like you in my area...AND I LOVE THEM AND I Love YOU!!AND I CARE... ABOUT ALL OF YOU.!!! I had to stop typing and cry.. No.. I'm no fake.. I'm not bull shit!!!I do care. We were all created for a purpose.. I know mine. To help kids like you. No I'm not one of those councelers, they are just college kids trying to make a grade. Yeah.. I told you I know the system.But I'm not one of them.Angel of death...You can make a difference in the world...in kids lifes. You have felt it in that one feeling you got when that boy said Thank God you are there everydaY...Please... look at this as a chance in life. Real life. I think you have a great oppertunity to help others thru your life.TAKE THE CHANCE.. Help others, its an awesome feeling. I LOVE life. I thank GOD every day for it.And for the chance to help others like you.You are a caring person.. I can tell from your post. What do you want to do with your life?... End it... Or help others who are in the same pain. I read whre you all are cutters to ease the pain... Try reaching out to others that feel the same way to help them to live... not die. THAT EASIES MY PAIN. Try it. Ibeg you all... Try it first. Listen to each other. Help and be there for each other to support each other.
ANGEL OF DARKNESS... help keep others alive....Please. dont let others die... tell them what you have felt. Enough preaching to you all... I will not give up on kids like you...dont give in to all that hurts you.Help others. Angel of death.. I hope you change your name to ANGEL OF LIFE. Help other kids like you. The feeling is better than death.. or bleeding.I promise.Thats how i heal myself of the pain. If you are interested in talking to me angel.. I will give you my email then..Angel... YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE!!! I know you have been through alot.. But use it to help others. Its a feeling I cant discribe. TRULIE.Believe me. Post again.. I PROMISE I will reply. Lets teach others how to treat and love each other as Gods children. Please reply to me.I'll watch for your reply. They call me Lil Mike since my step brother that I loved was named Mike and he was Big Mike. He passed away 2 years ago. They say it was Pneumonia. That was just to throw family off. He was lonely and did drugs to fill the loneliness. I'll be thinking of you Angel... Pleas post..
|08 Jul 2004||angel of darkness||im 13 years as i write this, but when anyone reads this ill be 14. when some people think about their b-day---a party starts to form in their head. thats only some. for me- when i saw my b-day on the calender i thought- 'oh great, another shitty year come and gone'. for how long ive been thinking this--well i really dont know. there may only be 13 years under my belt--but i still know more of some things than others. well let me tell you why im writing all this. when i was-oh about 3 years- my parents divorced after countless fights and arguments. my mom had full custody of me--my dad was an alcoholic/drugie. one day- i think it was close to christmas- mom said i ws never going to see her again- boy she was right. she put me up for adoption. my life has been hell ever since. some old lady adopted me. all she ever did was sleep, eat and yell. then one day she brought me to the store- i was about 5 or so- she left me for a while in the toy aisle. then this guy came up to me-took me outside and- oh i bet you can guess what happens next- he raped me in his car. he brought me to a local orphanage and said he found me on the streets. a few weeks later this fairly rich lady adopts me. i had the time of my life with her- until she got married to this drugged up fucking son of a bitch. whenever she would go out he would make me his 'slave for a day'. if i didnt do something right- he hit me- whether it be with the back of his hand or a baseball bat. after about 2 years the chic puts me up for adoption. then another old lady adopts me. i live with her until she dies- then i go live with her son who has a wife and 2 snot assed kids. i became socially isolated at the age of 8. ive lived with this family until about a year ago. although these last few years have been better than usual, the pain wont go away. 2 years ago is when i joined the unfortunate cutters society. everyday i would take a knife and dig it into my skin until it bled. why do you ask? because i need to feel the scream inside of me-i need to see the blood drop to the floor. one day i just decided to die. i wrote a note in which it said that i was sorry for leaving if anyone truly cared and that i slit my wrists. of course- the one min. out of the years that someone comes into my room just has to be then. they rush me to the ER. i was in there for a few months while i recovered. i did that 1 more time. the other 2 times i slit my throat and stabbed myself in the stomach. each time someone found me before i could die. now i write to you in a psychiatric ward. here i get to talk to a counsellor 2 times a day. im able to talk to the people here cause they know what its all like. and after about a month here ive been thinking. after 4 times or so of trying to kill myself- something much more powerful and mysterious has kept me here. why? i dont know. but i have found out that everyone has some sort of purpose- small or big. like this one very scared (of everything) boy down the hall tells me almost everytime i see him- everyday i thank god that youre there for me to talk to- and honestly it brings tears to my eyes after thinking about how much i can help him. that small of a thing is my purpose for now. and maybe one day all of humanity can find the inner peace that some have already found. life is a constant adventure that will never end. i hope none of you go through the shit i did. and if you do- just remember that there's always someone else in your corner too.|
|29 Jun 2004||Mauvais||CHRIS, yes famous chris, the chris everyone knows and hears about. I know you've seen what i've put and i honestly need you to e-mail me. I need you back. Everytime i was suicidal, cut, i had you to talk to. Tonight i cut, tried to kill myself again. I have 3 bottles of my pain meds right now, If you can just e-mail me, i miss u|
|27 Jun 2004||mdcracker||why, hellooo ya'll!!
when you are suicidal whatever you do, don't suddenly become relgious!! I've got nothing against suicide but religion is the most fucked-up bullshit in the world. Seriously, it contradicts itself, it's irrational, it's distorted by human behaviour, and there's about 10 billion of them! Think about it: there's are billions of different religions and each religion has followers who truely beleive in that religion. Take the towel-heads for example. They beleive in it so strongly that they kill themselves just to get to heaven. And so with that in mind, if each of the ten billion different religions only believes in one god, then 99.999% of all of them my be wrong. Why THE FUCK should you believe some Christian because he says he's right and THEY'RE wrong?!! Perhaps there is a god, but there sure as shit isn't any religion. As if someone so perfect (which he would have to be) would create something so completely faulted and hypercritical as the bible and modern (and past) Christianity. Like the inquisition, that was in the name of god. So what the fuck? has his name changed so much in 400 years? I doubt it. Anyway the point of this is to say don't let your state of mind allow you to be convinced into a religion. It's so damn wrong how the religious people pray on depressed people. And they do, as far as my personal experience goes.